http://manly.ng/nigerian-man-marry-a-virgin/

This virginity thing. It seems a big issue for you. And it’s generating awkward contradictions in you. It’s the hidden reason you’re struggling with your emotions. You’re conflicted inside because you know you have no standing.



Okay, here’s the thing: In life, you must learn to use appropriate yardstick to judge and determine issues. You don’t use a ruler for example to measure the purity of water. That’s an inappropriate instrument though a measurement. Neither do you use a stethoscope to measure the pressure of a tyre. It’s a wrong pressure gauge. In the same manner, you can’t use dutifulness in church as parameter to determine the suitability of a conjugal prospect. It can serve as corroborative factor or even corroborant, but it cannot be the primary basis of consideration. A good church worker is not necessarily going to be a good wife, though the word “good” is common. Two separate issues. I mean, that she can sing down the heavens doesn’t mean she will make you a good wife. Vocal dexterity is not qualification for coupling. Choir is not a marriage context. If you base your marriage decision on her ability to sing, you’re clearly using a wrong means of measurement. A singing voice for example cannot help you determine if she’s clean or a relative of Unhygienix of Asterix fame. That’s how people arrive at wrong marital decisions. They use wrong parameters. And such a mistake can prove very costly to a man in particular.

Now let’s come to your issue. You want to marry a virgin. But there’s an inherent contradiction in your quest. You can’t test her virginity unless you sleep with her, in which case she’ll no longer be and you won’t marry a virgin. The truth is, all you have is her word. It’s what she says she is that she is at this stage of your relationship. You can’t even verify her word without compromising your faith. Now, here’s the irony of your quest for a virgin wife: You’re not a virgin yourself. At some point before you embraced your faith you engaged in sexual congresses. In other words, you have a past. In the same vein, she also has a past. But you’re willing to embrace your past but not hers.

As per your wife you want to be the man who “hit it first”, but tell me, the women you hit first who’ll marry those? In essence you can’t take what you dished out. The idea of someone being there before you consternates you. You can’t handle it, ironically. The reason she’s not giving you the confirmation you want on her virgin status is probably because she’s not. She likes you, wants you, but you’ve put impediment on progress: demanded for something she can’t amend retroactively. And so she can’t lie about her past, and she can’t tell you the truth either. Stalemate. You somehow think that her non-virginal status is indicative of a colourful and flavourful past. Perhaps. Same applies to you I guess. But you’ve not told me who she really is, just her sexual history. You didn’t indicate if she’s a loving and kindhearted woman. Whether or not she’s caring. You’ve not told me whether she’s trustworthy, whether she’s someone you can entrust your life to. And it’s not as if you’re accusing her of promiscuity. So the broken hymen just indicates she’s had sex in the past.

What I’m trying to say is, virginity is really not a test of whether someone will make you a good wife. You’re using a ruler to measure tyre pressure. Now if virginity is a psychological barrier for you, I’d say don’t go into marriage with her. You’ll keep judging her in the present because you can’t deal with her past. I’ll advice you keep your imagination in check. Stop imagining someone in the past on top of her. It’s unhelpful. But you have to reconcile yourself to the possibility you may not marry a virgin. Being real! Learn to be real in life. Your generation is very experimental with sex, and sexual imagery is so pervasive. Your music videos are highly suggestive. Think Anaconda. You’re being conditioned to accept raw sexuality. That conditioning generates results. Makes kids want to experiment with sex.


Be careful that your quest for virginity doesn’t make you miss a very wonderful and loving woman. Perhaps the first thing you ought to consider is what you want in a wife, what should you want in a wife. If this woman meets your criteria of a good wife to you I’d say go for her. You don’t want to regret not marrying her. If you marry an alternate, note that the virginity qualification will end on your wedding night. Then the marriage begins. You don’t want a wife who qualifies for only the wedding night do you? What happens in the days and years ahead? The faith you avow is very much anchored on Paul’s immortal words: If any man (or woman) be in Christ, he or she is a new creature. Old things have passed away. All things have become new. It’s either you’re going to accept God’s word concerning this lady or not. The decision is yours.

If you don’t however, that will be most unfortunate. I’m sure you’ve read about Pharisees. They were fond of using differing standards- one for themselves, another for others. Jesus had a running battle with those guys. You’re not a Pharisee are you? You can’t judge this lady by one set of standards and use another for yourself. It’s pharisaic.


http://manly.ng/nigerian-man-marry-a-virgin/

I concur.. I'd like to add, the only men who want to marry virgins are hypocritical sons of biitches with no sense! I prefer non-virgins.. For lots of reasons.. Experience, honesty and whatnot..

.

Estharfabian:
if he's not A virgin and Won't marry a lady except she's one..

Then, he's A deluded, egocentric, dimwitted Scumbag!

And I Hope he gets hit by a car and falls Off from the highest point Of Mount.Everest...And breaks his head...and then DIES.!!

Sister Esther, How Stupid Art Thou? A Male Choosing To Marry A Virgin Female Is Now A Bad Thing Abi?

AnyWays..I Think The Shìt You Typed Above Should Be Directed To The Guy Whom DisVirgined You.
Thanks..

Thk u op, we wey no be virgin, no be man disvirgin us?

Story for d gods! Why would I be paying for her dowry when she isn't a virgin? What am I paying for? She has given it freely to sm1 maybe 10 or 20 or 50 how would I know? The best u can do for her is just give her belle and forget marriage. Thank God for my wife to be....I met a virgin and I will marry her even if she has a little shortcomings, no one is perfect even me.

Estharfabian:
if he's not A virgin and Won't marry a lady except she's one..

Then, he's A deluded, egocentric, dimwitted Scumbag!

And I Hope he gets hit by a car and falls Off from the highest point Of Mount.Everest...And breaks his head...and then DIES.!!

Brutal

true talk

Michellla:
Brutal

glimpse33:
Sister Esther, How Stupid Art Thou? A Virgin Male Choosing To Marry A Fellow Virgin Female Is Now A Bad Thing Abi?

AnyWays..I Think The Shìt You Typed Above Should Be Directed To The Guy Whom DisVirgined You.
Thanks..

she meant any guy thats not a virgin,yet wanna marry a virgin is a dimwitted scum_I.e.SlowPoke.
get it?

Estharfabian:
if he's not A virgin and Won't marry a lady except she's one..

Then, he's A deluded, egocentric, dimwitted Scumbag!

And I Hope he gets hit by a car and falls Off from the highest point Of Mount.Everest...And breaks his head...and then his Legs, And then DIES.!!

I can tell you read a lot!
Or you are a. Movie buff,from the way you write I can tell you have a brilliant mind...
Its nothing don't mention,
But still team #virgingalsonly

Estharfabian:
if he's not A virgin and Won't marry a lady except she's one..

Then, he's A deluded, egocentric, dimwitted Scumbag!

And I Hope he gets hit by a car and falls Off from the highest point Of Mount.Everest...And breaks his head...and then his Legs, And then DIES.!!

I can tell you read a lot!
Or you are a. Movie buff,from the way you write I can tell you have a brilliant mind...
Its nothing don't mention,
But still team #virgingalsonly..

glimpse33:

Yeah, I Got It Now. Thanks

yea dont just read.assimilate too ))

No be by V-Yansh abeg! To think that there was a time when I used to feel like "if my wife is a virgin ehn, I'd adore her in a special way"..Furk that shiit mhen! Feels like centuries ago. If I love you enough to wife you, then I'll always adore you in a special way..Where ma tigress at?

glimpse33:
Sister Esther, How Stupid Art Thou? A Male Choosing To Marry A Virgin Female Is Now A Bad Thing Abi?
AnyWays..I Think The Shìt You Typed Above Should Be Directed To The Guy Whom DisVirgined You.
Thanks..

Bros, you for cool down read wetin the babe write wella, con understand am before you comment. See as them dey use pupu rub you now. Take heart..

Estharfabian:
Big slowpoke!!,

You should Read what i wrote Again... Slowly this time..Or probably give Your phone to Someone who actually knows outta read to decipher its meaning to You.. Michellla Help him Out?

LoL! I'm really bad at pidgin English Buh lemme help your unfortunate poor self...

''i talk say if him no be virgin and him wan marry person wey be virgin by all means, then,make he die!!"

Get it now?? vivid enough? Oloshi!

he's out of his misery now.

Estharfabian:
Awwwee!

See?? I'm not that silly After all!
Truce?

YEAH TRUCE..



But...



VIRGIN GIRLS ROCKS

Estharfabian:
If You Are indeed A Virgin... Then, sweetheart, I have No problem with that...it's your right!

Buh if you're not... you know the rest?


nyways...I read a lot! mostly Romantic Novels and medical encyclopedias... And also watch lots of movies..
Buh uh...Thanks czarr!

I'll like to say this,
Just cause I'm not a virgin doesn't make me any less deserving of a virgin girl...that you don't have money(not you) doesn't make you any less deserving of a rich guy.

I keep telling people to read stuffs,especially novels it increases your vocabulary and your sense of humour.l just checked you out I see you have some sort of e-diary.

I'll check that out once in a while.

Seems jaunty Esther is vexing this morning lol! Seems we need to appease the gods.

Estharfabian:
if he's not A virgin and Won't marry a lady except she's one..

Then, he's A deluded, egocentric, dimwitted Scumbag!

And I Hope he gets hit by a car and falls Off from the highest point Of Mount.Everest...And breaks his head...and then his Legs, And then DIES.!!

cool down before u kill ya self.i pray you die soon.