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Igbo And Benin, My Pains - Romance - Nairaland

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Twitter War Between Igbo And Yoruba Over Who Has The Most Beautiful Women (pics) / My Pains.... My Regrets / Pics Of Beautiful Girls From Igbo And Hausa/fulani Tribes To Help Decide. (2) (3) (4)

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Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Kimberly60: 11:37am On Jan 14, 2016
I met her when she just graduated from Madona okija, she is from Edo state and lives in Benin, she was all I wanted in a woman, am ibo, I live and work in Ph, I will make it brief, we have dated for 2yrs now, her mom is aware of my efforts and struggles towards this relationship, to be sincere I have loved this girl with all my life, sometime in August 2015 I engaged her in her church, she accepted to marry me only to get home and her mom asked her to return the ring, she can't marry me cos am ibo and she is Benin, secondly am not very rich, and I practically have nothing to offer her, finally she is the only Gurl, Hmmmmm she never wore the ring for one day after d engagement, I kept complaining but all to no avail, she never made me see her put effort to be with me, I kept complaining, I can't count the number of times I drive to Benin just to see her, if I say 40 times God knows it's too small, I have introduced her to my family and making arrangements for marriage only for her to chat me up saying the relationship is over, she cant continue, am in deep pains, deeper than you can imagine, telling me she is the only girl of her mom, am trying so hard to move on, her mom knows so well my efforts, she never stopped the relationship all the while, when her daughter was posted to delta for service I drive all the way from ph to Edo to pick her and take her there, I can boldly say through out her service year not for once did she go to her PPA alone, all of a sudden I have nothing to offer, God will Judge them all. They deceived me: they will forever struggle and at the end have a worthless end, I write this in pain, I just need an advice on how to move on, is it wrong loving a girl who isn't your tribe?

1 Share

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Abatsam111(m): 11:40am On Jan 14, 2016
Touching! Take heart bro

1 Like

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Jhymrod(f): 11:43am On Jan 14, 2016
Such is life, you don't have a choice than to move on. Ur wifey is on the way.........
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by whirlwind7(m): 11:52am On Jan 14, 2016
Don't take it so hard. just try to move on.
To her mother, you were obviously good enough to shag her daughter, but not suitable to marry her.

In this day and age, many unenlightened people still consider tribe when marriage issues are broached. I have witnessed this several times,
It's so painful.

On the other hand, consider this as a blessing. If after all your sacrifice and devotion, and this girl terminates the relationship JUST BECAUSE HER MOTHER SAID SO, then you are better off not getting married to her, because her parents interference would have become much more unbearable if you guys had gotten married.

You have probably escaped a lifetime of pain and anguish narrowly.

2 Likes

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by fibial: 12:03pm On Jan 14, 2016
he he he....tired of advising niggas neva to fall n luv,cool you learnt the only way you choosed to.
she's done nothing wrong bro,life s all about choice and seems any form of investment with you would yield lil profit so she did what was best for business.
Move on dude cus ts ur only wise choice.

2 Likes

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by StefanSalvatore: 12:10pm On Jan 14, 2016
U av 2 stay strong bro sh!t happens

It might b a blessing in disguise who knows

Dats y it's gud smtyms not 2 put all ur eggs in one basket, one has 2 diversify

Gudluck

2 Likes

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by tonychristopher: 12:17pm On Jan 14, 2016
Kimberly60:
I met her when she just graduated from Madona okija, she is from Edo state and lives in Benin, she was all I wanted in a woman, am ibo, I live and work in Ph, I will make it brief, we have dated for 2yrs now, her mom is aware of my efforts and struggles towards this relationship, to be sincere I have loved this girl with all my life, sometime in August 2015 I engaged her in her church, she accepted to marry me only to get home and her mom asked her to return the ring, she can't marry me cos am ibo and she is Benin, secondly am not very rich, and I practically have nothing to offer her, finally she is the only Gurl, Hmmmmm she never wore the ring for one day after d engagement, I kept complaining but all to no avail, she never made me see her put effort to be with me, I kept complaining, I can't count the number of times I drive to Benin just to see her, if I say 40 times God knows it's too small, I have introduced her to my family and making arrangements for marriage only for her to chat me up saying the relationship is over, she cant continue, am in deep pains, deeper than you can imagine, telling me she is the only girl of her mom, am trying so hard to move on, her mom knows so well my efforts, she never stopped the relationship all the while, when her daughter was posted to delta for service I drive all the way from ph to Edo to pick her and take her there, I can boldly say through out her service year not for once did she go to her PPA alone, all of a sudden I have nothing to offer, God will Judge them all. They deceived me: they will forever struggle and at the end have a worthless end, I write this in pain, I just need an advice on how to move on, is it wrong loving a girl who isn't your tribe?

Stop These cries beacsue of woman ...us her toto gold...igbo men are known to be hard ...I doubt if you are igbo

You are a disgrace

What happened to igbo women from Delta , anambra enugu and imo

Guy man up

You are not igbo but ibo

That has been noted

A lot of wanna be

3 Likes

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Penssuwa(m): 12:27pm On Jan 14, 2016
Understand this, marriage is not a do or die affair. It's not all about marrying who you love but staying mutually in love afterwards. Love can blur your vision from seeing ahead. Don't you see she had made up her mind effortlessly. She has her reasons. Just move on and stop reading the book of Lamentation and reminiscing on all the emotional & material "investments" made... better one awaits you.
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by prettymina(f): 12:28pm On Jan 14, 2016
Hmmmm story that touch...so guys too dey feel heartbreak Eeya sorry bro jst take a bold step nd move on
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Nobody: 12:47pm On Jan 14, 2016
This is really sad. Some ladies sha, when they start crying later about spiritual forces that are attacking them they won't know they are the architects of their own problems.


For the love of God why lead the guy on only to dash his hopes later?


My dear op, pick yourself up you will indeed survive. There's nothing wrong with loving sum1 from another tribe, its just dense, unprogressive illitrates and bigots that feel otherwise. You'll meet a better woman that deserves u and in no time too. Cheers!

2 Likes

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by xp17(m): 12:50pm On Jan 14, 2016
Boss, i feel your pain, all you need is the heart of a Yoruba man grin

The problem with most guys is that they try so hard. Reading through your post, i discovered all you did was trying so hard to create a good impression. You were too available, even when you were not needed. You had to drive from PH to benin in other to take her to delta. Between Benin and PH which is closer to delta? It's like 1hr from benin vs 7hrs to benin, then back to delta, I call that desperation.

You have not done wrong in loving her. i bet you thought loving her was good enough, far far fowl! grin
On a serious note, you have to love and watch. Watching is very important, i no some say love is blind, but you need observations to know wether she's reciprocating whatever you give in, otherwise it's never going to end well. You gave in 100%, that's trying too hard. next time try to give in 60% and let her give at least 40% on the start, later on it should go for 50/50.

Principle is better than common sense. You gave her an engagement ring which she never wore and common sense told you to keep your cool and listen to her silly excuses, but set principles would have told you to have her wear that ring regardless of what extraordinary excuse she's come up with.

A piece of advice for your future relationship. never leave anyone with the impression that they're doing you a favor to be in your life. Secondly, don't try to hard to always be available even when you are not needed and finally, you seem to be a nice guy, don't let this one bad apple change your good personally. Go out and have fun, now you have a better chance of meeting someone better.



[size=15pt]Give more time to yourself and get your phone battery charge
Good luck[/size]

4 Likes

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Maxi112: 12:50pm On Jan 14, 2016
sori bro.. U need to move on
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Nobody: 12:53pm On Jan 14, 2016
This is bad. I feel ur pain bro but it's better u let her go. She's gonna regret later, believe me. It's not gonna be hard to move on, it will be like forever but hard times don't last. Focus on other things to wine away time. Don't delete her on ur social media's, let her know u ar happy without her even if it's fake. Moving on is d hardest but u will scale through, it's just a matter of time. Take heart bro
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Nobody: 12:57pm On Jan 14, 2016
Sorry ur love was blind,now eye don open
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by iHustle(m): 1:03pm On Jan 14, 2016
My brother, it's not a tribal issue. Their problem is that you are not as rich as they want. Don't be pained, rather thank God for saving you from gold diggers. When you are rich, people won't even mind where you're from.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by cyprus000: 1:14pm On Jan 14, 2016
[size=13pt]
What do you expect we tell you?.."sorry" or "your Gf mom is wicked", So it can feed your sense of self pity.
Only weaklings expect that, and I will not be part of that.

It is provoking that a self acclaimed man will turn himself to a "weepy cushion", over sundry things.

I mean, why on earth will you dignify a GF with that sort of attachement and importance when it is evident that the feeling isn't reciprocal, from a girl who claimed to love you and can't stand her ground against ethnic barrier for your sake.

Hey bro, learn to prepare for the worst and pray for the best.
Nobody apart from your family should be accrued this type of importance.

This is why I tell guyz not to love in a relationship. Let her do the loving while you reciprocate to be on the safe side., while at it, make sure you prepare yourself for betrayal,disappiontement...the world is cruel and you have to learn to live in it to avoid something abysmal.



[/size]

3 Likes

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Barram: 1:19pm On Jan 14, 2016
Lalasticlala

1 Like

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Derawiz(m): 1:35pm On Jan 14, 2016
My late aunt was married to a benin man,maybe the story would be different if you try bringing ur family along to visit hers.Try letting them understand that this is the 21st century and no longer during d inter tribal wars days..Hopefully Good would see u through..

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by ifeanyi83(m): 1:38pm On Jan 14, 2016
Gosh...and i'm just about to tow that line...i'll take my chances...

2 Likes

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by menabae(f): 1:45pm On Jan 14, 2016
Very sad.... angry

1 Like

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by kaziblake(f): 2:06pm On Jan 14, 2016
Tribalism in nigeria,will it ever end?
It's not 2day it started.
My friend mother told her never to bring home a certain tribe for marriage,can you imagine?
My youth leader father swore he will never endorse her marriage cause she found love in another tribe.
Take heart,its sometimes Like dat.

1 Like

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by franzis(m): 4:08pm On Jan 14, 2016
funny how some parents take decisions over their children, am ibo,my dad was telling the other day not ever bring a woman who is Yoruba, benin or calabar and he couldn't still give me any reasonable reason,

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by wyman3: 4:51pm On Jan 14, 2016
Barram:
Lalasticlala
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by tpiah2: 4:53pm On Jan 14, 2016
Kimberly60:
I will forever struggle and at the end have a worthless end

ori elepe lepe nmo.

back to sender
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by tpiah2: 4:53pm On Jan 14, 2016
franzis:
funny how some parents take decisions over their children, am ibo,my dad was telling the other day not ever bring a woman who is Yoruba, benin or calabar and he couldn't still give me any reasonable reason,

what is wrong with you dating and marrying your fellow Igbo?

1 Like

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Jackrich: 5:02pm On Jan 14, 2016
Mumu boys are just like MTN these days - Everywhere you go.

See toto wey you dun dey jam since wey go taya you tomorrow na im you wan die put ? grin grin

Kaman commot for road make I see road.

Olodo op. cheesy
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by 247notire(m): 5:44pm On Jan 14, 2016
Kimberly60:
I met her when she just graduated from Madona okija, she is from Edo state and lives in Benin, she was all I wanted in a woman, am ibo, I live and work in Ph, I will make it brief, we have dated for 2yrs now, her mom is aware of my efforts and struggles towards this relationship, to be sincere I have loved this girl with all my life, sometime in August 2015 I engaged her in her church, she accepted to marry me only to get home and her mom asked her to return the ring, she can't marry me cos am ibo and she is Benin, secondly am not very rich, and I practically have nothing to offer her, finally she is the only Gurl, Hmmmmm she never wore the ring for one day after d engagement, I kept complaining but all to no avail, she never made me see her put effort to be with me, I kept complaining, I can't count the number of times I drive to Benin just to see her, if I say 40 times God knows it's too small, I have introduced her to my family and making arrangements for marriage only for her to chat me up saying the relationship is over, she cant continue, am in deep pains, deeper than you can imagine, telling me she is the only girl of her mom, am trying so hard to move on, her mom knows so well my efforts, she never stopped the relationship all the while, when her daughter was posted to delta for service I drive all the way from ph to Edo to pick her and take her there, I can boldly say through out her service year not for once did she go to her PPA alone, all of a sudden I have nothing to offer, God will Judge them all. They deceived me: they will forever struggle and at the end have a worthless end, I write this in pain, I just need an advice on how to move on, is it wrong loving a girl who isn't your tribe?
Bro, she never really loved you, co's uve been the one trying too hard to make her love you but she just does not. She used u all the while. If she really loved you she wouldn't care whatever her mom thinks about you. Chide urself a lil, drink or smoke or do wateva relieves ur sorrow for a while then pick ur fĂșcking self up and move on, taking the bitter lessons from this episode. There are other beautiful girls out thr trust me.

PS: If there's no fireworks from the start and she isn't deep into you, don't invest too much in it financially, emotionally and otherwise.

1 Like

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by franzis(m): 6:11pm On Jan 14, 2016
tpiah2:


what is wrong with you dating and marrying your fellow Igbo?
what is wrong with an an ibo dating and marrying from other tribe..
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by FTBOY: 7:12pm On Jan 14, 2016
tonychristopher:


Stop These cries beacsue of woman ...us her toto gold...igbo men are known to be hard ...I doubt if you are igbo

You are a disgrace

What happened to igbo women from Delta , anambra enugu and imo

Guy man up

You are not igbo but ibo

That has been noted

A lot of wanna be
oga, stop spewing thrash from the corner of your mouth! what do you mean by igbo men are hard......are igbo men no longer humans with flesh and blood? and is it compulsory that he marries from his own tribe? are igbo girls from delta, anambra, enugu or imo angels? wtf are you saying? maybe you've never experienced true love and heartbreak in your life.....i don't expect you to understand

3 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by FTBOY: 7:16pm On Jan 14, 2016
cyprus000:
[size=13pt]
What do you expect we tell you?.."sorry" or "your Gf mom is wicked", So it can feed your sense of self pity.
Only weaklings expect that, and I will not be part of that.

It is provoking that a self acclaimed man will turn himself to a "weepy cushion", over sundry things.

I mean, why on earth will you dignify a GF with that sort of attachement and importance when it is evident that the feeling isn't reciprocal, from a girl who claimed to love you and can't stand her ground against ethnic barrier for your sake.

Hey bro, learn to prepare for the worst and pray for the best.
Nobody apart from your family should be accrued this type of importance.

This is why I tell guyz not to love in a relationship. Let her do the loving while you reciprocate to be on the safe side., while at it, make sure you prepare yourself for betrayal,disappiontement...the world is cruel and you have to learn to live in it to avoid something abysmal.



[/size]
i like your contribution but u fell out flat when you said guys should not love in their relationships. love doesn't work one-sided. it has to be reciprocal to work
Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by tonychristopher: 7:25pm On Jan 14, 2016
FTBOY:

oga, stop spewing thrash from the corner of your mouth! what do you mean by igbo men are hard......are igbo men no longer humans with flesh and blood? and is it compulsory that he marries from his own tribe? are igbo girls from delta, anambra, enugu or imo angels? wtf are you saying? maybe you've never experienced true love and heartbreak in your life.....i don't expect you to understand
Igbo men are forbidden to even cry when they lost their parents ..here you are crying for a girl that is not your wife


You are ibo not igbo

2 Likes

Re: Igbo And Benin, My Pains by Eleganza33(f): 8:15pm On Jan 14, 2016
So so sori u wil get ova it soon pls cheer up

1 Like

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