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What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? - Romance - Nairaland

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What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by lavila: 3:06pm On Jun 26, 2009
I dated a virgin(19yrs) 4 about 6months and although with no talks abt marriage 'cos i bliv we were stil young n had a lot more to think about. However, her parents want her to marry early. Her mum asked her to leave me 4 a man that claimed he wanted to marry her. The guy used her and jilted her and she wants to come back. I dnt trust her family anymore and they are very ashamed. Is it wise to give her a second chance afta they betrayed my trust
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by whitelexi(m): 3:14pm On Jun 26, 2009
No. . .  Seriously. Leave her for her family, they will still come into the picture again and again. I also have a problem with the girl doing as she was told - dating someone she didnt even know anything of, simply cos mummy and daddy said so. . .  She's obviously still dependent on them and at 19 will remain so for a long while.

Girls who cannot utter a complete sentence without mentioning something about their daddies or mummies are still kids and need to be left alone
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by Feelitx(m): 3:28pm On Jun 26, 2009
I am very impatient with children.They can't make a decision and stand by it.
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by biola44: 3:38pm On Jun 26, 2009
ow many adults stand by their decisions? grin
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by frank317: 4:12pm On Jun 26, 2009
what do u mean by the man used her and dumped her?

well go back and confirm if she is still a virgin, if she is not, good for u. now u have a woman and not a girl.
the man only came in and did what u wouldnt do for 6whole months.

u must go back and recapture u lost moments with her. I promise u that by the time u are into her this time, u will forget weather she left u b4 or not
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by lavila: 5:38pm On Jun 26, 2009
, but she wanted someone that wd marry her to disvirgin her bt she gt it all wrong n is now paying 4 her naivety.
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by frank317: 7:36pm On Jun 26, 2009
i just think she is more useful to u now than before. moreover she has gotten more experience, her hearts been broken unlike when she was suffering from the ignorance called virginity virginity
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by ashaby(f): 7:46pm On Jun 26, 2009
@frank
Wonder why i can resist answering ur posts. Seriously, when last did u visit yaba left?
@post
No one can make the decision for u bro, u have to take the bulls by the horns and decide what u want. Take care
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by Nobody: 8:04pm On Jun 26, 2009
lavila:

, but she wanted someone that wd marry her to disvirgin her bt she gt it all wrong n is now paying 4 her naivety.

Too bad for her cry
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by lavila: 2:02am On Jun 27, 2009
Too bad 4 her! Why?
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by Nobody: 2:09am On Jun 27, 2009
I feel bad for her cuz her family drove her to it.
If she stood by you, her family would have disowned her.
Then, would you have taken care of her, take her in, be responsible for her expenses etc?
Its not so easy, you see. I'm sure she wanted you.
But age 19, she still lives under her parents umbrella.
Her parents is who you should be angry with.
I mean, did she encourage her parents decisions?

We musn't be too quick to judge na
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by ikamefa(f): 2:16am On Jun 27, 2009
@ topic

the question is do you really still love the girl? can you forgive and overlook her past discretion/s?

if yes! then take her back!

whether she is still omo mummy oh! grin or omo grandma oh! those issues are irrelevant


FL Gators:

I feel bad for her cuz her family drove her to it.
If she stood by you, her family would have disowned her.
Then, would you have taken care of her, take her in, be responsible for her expenses etc?
Its not so easy, you see. I'm sure she wanted you.
But age 19, she still lives under her parents umbrella.
Her parents is who you should be angry with.
I mean, did she encourage her parents decisions?

We musn't be too quick to judge na

gbam!
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by lavila: 2:30am On Jun 27, 2009
But i dnt even have a job because i just graduated. Is that why they can't wait? Besides, i dnt bliv that i hv to rush into marriage.
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by Nobody: 2:44am On Jun 27, 2009
lavila:

But i dnt even have a job because i just graduated. Is that why they can't wait? Besides, i dnt bliv that i hv to rush into marriage.
First of all, you shouldnt even be in a serious relationship if you dnt have a job.

2. How old are you? Maybe its your age that made the parent reconsider another marriagable man for her.

3. If her parent still insists on marriage, then you better leave the girl alone cuz you dnt sound like you're ready for marraige.

4. Don't expect her to say "NO" to her parents. No responsble girl would leaver her parent's house for a jobless young man. (NO offense intended) smiley its just that you're both too young.
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by lavila: 2:56am On Jun 27, 2009
Am 24? Are u tryin to say that money is the driving factor in a serious r/s.
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by Nobody: 3:03am On Jun 27, 2009
lavila:

Am 24? Are u tryin to say that money is the driving factor in a serious r/s.
What am saying is, no man that can't take care of himself financially should get a girl.
What? You think she'd want to play suga mama and take care of you?
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by Beaf: 3:08am On Jun 27, 2009
lavila:

Am 24? Are u tryin to say that money is the driving factor in a serious r/s.

Money can be a crashing factor in a serious relationship. Take this thing like a man, its experience.
Take her back if you still value her (except she has older sisters, in which case run! The parents have done it before and will do it again).

. . .But I suspect that manly pride might be the real obstacle (someone was there first in what was rightfully yours).
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by lavila: 3:16am On Jun 27, 2009
She's the only girl. He younger sista died a few years ago. Bt not all r/s lead to marriage.
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by 190: 3:44am On Jun 27, 2009
oooh plss,
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by lavila: 4:39am On Jun 27, 2009
Ooh plss, ?!
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by TheSeeker(m): 5:29am On Jun 27, 2009
@Poster

I do not think she's the right girl for you. First of all, she's 19 and I don't see why a 19 year old should be pressured into marriage by her parents unless of course they don't have better plans for her. There are parents who want their daughters to succeed and be a good, established and successful woman before they get married but in her case I see otherwise.

I am almost confident that her parents are looking to make off some financial gains from shipping her to a matrimonial home. Force marriage on a 19 year old is way too absurd! Who does that these days?
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by iice(f): 12:24pm On Jun 27, 2009
Feelitx:

I am very impatient with children.They can't make a decision and stand by it.

People in general cannot stand by their decisions.  Sad.

TheSeeker:

I am almost confident that her parents are looking to make off some financial gains from shipping her to a matrimonial home.  Force marriage on a 19 year old is way too absurd! Who does that these days?

It's so normal around a number of countries around that world that it's scary.

Since you feel too young.  .  .you focus more on yourself now.
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by TheSeeker(m): 12:27pm On Jun 27, 2009
iice:


[color=#9900ff]It's so normal around a number of countries around that world that it's scary.

What is so normal around a number of countries? Forcing marriage on a 19 year old girl? Or making off financial gains from marriage?
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by iice(f): 12:32pm On Jun 27, 2009
TheSeeker:

making off financial gains from marriage
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by tommy2k2(m): 1:08pm On Jun 27, 2009
whats the educational background of the girl? is she not a student??
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by asha80(m): 1:44pm On Jun 27, 2009
frank3.16:

what do u mean by the man used her and dumped her?

well go back and confirm if she is still a virgin, if she is not, good for u. now u have a woman and not a girl.
the man only came in and did what u wouldnt do for 6whole months.

u must go back and recapture u lost moments with her. I promise u that by the time u are into her this time, u will forget weather she left u b4 or not

grin
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by frank317: 2:23pm On Jun 27, 2009
Guy take back the the girl like i told you, especially if u still like her. she is now a woman, well baked for you, no more excuses. Infact u now have the real thing. I wish u all the best.

Dont mind anybody telling you that the fact that u dont have mony u shouldnt have a girl. Thats complete bullshit. Allu u need to have a girl is selfesteem, confidence and ambition.

even touts on the street have girlfriend, what more of a graduate. the only thing u need do now is to define the relationship, solidify it. dont let your financial condition determine your role as a man.

you see, if u had slept with her is the first place she wouldnt have left you that easily for the other man. but now u have the chance to make her ur woman.
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by izeek(m): 2:31pm On Jun 27, 2009
@ 19, she's too young to have her say, dat age girls are stil scared to admit to thier folks about having a bf how much more challenging thier authority on choice of a hubby. Like most have said here, b rest assured that taking her back would have its issues. Like xta change, nd more interfarance from her parents. I think you should just let her be cos u are niether ready or capable to the challenges ahead.
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by Nobody: 10:09pm On Jun 27, 2009
24! You just a year than me men you ain't financially sound.There's boyfriend material and husband material and you are the former leave her for more serious suitors if they sent her packin how would cater for her.Am sure you haven't done service that leave you with max of a 40k job.Better face your career you too young.Peace
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by lavila: 7:57pm On Jun 28, 2009
R u asking me to go 4 sum1 younger than her?
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by Secretz(f): 8:32pm On Jun 28, 2009
This is a prime example of why 'parents are not always right'. Too right , they should be ashamed of themselves.
I'm sorry but at 19 , she should atleast 'some' independent thoughts, well atleast I know I did. As much as my mum can rant about me being 26 and no husband, she can NEVER make me do anything.

I feel sorry for the girl too, but just because she has been 'broken into' does not make her a 'woman'. That family for now, will be forever in her life until she stands her own ground. To make matters worse, you yourself are not even ready to settle down, leave her for them.
Really, her parents are the people you have an issue with.

FL Gators:

First of all, you shouldnt even be in a serious relationship if you dnt have a job.

2. How old are you? Maybe its your age that made the parent reconsider another marriagable man for her.

3. If her parent still insists on marriage, then you better leave the girl alone cuz you dnt sound like you're ready for marraige.

4. Don't expect her to say "NO" to her parents. No responsble girl would leaver her parent's house for a jobless young man. (NO offense intended) smiley its just that you're both too young.



I agree with you cos I certainly would not! lol, but should the girl at 19 be even thinking about marriage? Hence why her parents shouldn't have married her off in the first place. They should let her get on with her education and other important things. wink grin
Re: What Can Be More Stupid Than This In A R/s? by iice(f): 2:54am On Jun 29, 2009
Secretz:

This is a prime example of why 'parents are not always right'. Too right , they should be ashamed of themselves.
I'm sorry but at 19 , she should atleast 'some' independent thoughts, well atleast I know I did.

No many people are of independent thoughts. . .some even at 30 still have no independent thoughts. And well with parents, sometimes it's nearly impossible.

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