We were friends first, met at work, worked together for a while, got to know ine another over time, got closer, she was in a long term relationship, 15 years, no love, no common likes or wants, just there for each other, I was 6 years seperated, not lloking for a reltionship at all. Our friendship grew closer, began to get closer, a lifetime of common goals, wants, desires, pasions, problems, and so on. We like all the same things, have all the same desires and passions in life and love. We are like solemates in so many ways, our palm lines are the same, our laugh lines are the same. We have the same personal problems, her children, my step children, same financial problems, work for the same company, bsaically the same position, we both feel used and abused, need to move on, career wise that is, but now she is hinking of the life she left behind. Mind you, the time we were together, she never let be known to her past life, and I only wanted to boast about her with mine. Keep in mind, I met her children, and got along great, but no one else. She, met my step children, faimily, and friends, and all loved her. She needs time to think about what she wants, what she needs to do, where she wants to go. We see each other every day during work, are best friends still, weekends now, we talk, but don't see each other. This is killing me so, and her as well, as I hear it in her voice, in her vtears, as she hears mine. I don't know what to do, I feel like a caged animal. When we talk I smile, when we hang up I cry. In between, I can't function, and cry alot. This is the one love of a lifetime, I know. yes, i do, as being married 3 times before. the first was what I thought I should do as the age was right, the second, well, only lived together, she asked to marry, I said no, and the third was just an escape from the 2nd. Always said after those 3, no more. Well after 6 years, i met this one, friends for months, anf then it grew and grew. I wish i could tell you the feling I get whaen I just think about her, hear her voice, look into her eyes. Okay now, help!!

she was in a long term relationship, 15 years, no love, no common likes or wants, just there for each other

15 years, no love, heh? You mean she's married, right?

No, she was not married, then nor now.

Passionate, what is the "koko" of your question?

Alheri, right on! Make you tell us the Koko, cos your write up is kinda confusing!

Ohh common u guys! You don't see the koko in this??

The guy is in deep Confusion.. he is in love. He don't know wat to do.

He has been married threee times. He said no more to marriage, but a particular woman is killing him right now. He cant stop thinking about her. The woman has kids too. But she is not married. He sees in her eyes that she wants him. But she's just not sure if what she wants is what she needs.

They've known each other for so long, been talking for soo long. He's in love people. Help him. Advice him. I feel this story like a cup feels the water in it.

Ohhh.. i feel so sad for you passionate.

Well from the look of it all, you are like waaaaaaay older than me. So forgive me for whatever it is that i am gonna say that might seem childish. Well my 'lil advice' is that. You should tell her how you feel maybe. Since you are older, you should know the ways to talk to a lady. I see that you really love her. Just tell her and i pray everything works fine.

Don't let your past relationship be the judge of the future ones. Your past three could be.. yuck.. but this kinda sounds like real. U should give it a try.

assuming the title of this topic is your question, we are confused as to your problem. You kinda mention that all you have met is her kids and not friends or other family. I'm assuming that this is your frustration and the "past" you mention is hidden from you. Well, you have been in three marriages. Did the other women steal your tongue and balls? Open your damn mouth and ask her about her family, friends, and past.

Thx Hotta! I will think up a solution

I trust you fabian.

i think my solution works just fine

[topic will be trashed if 'pasionate' doesn't respond']

passionate,please respond. i want to understand your plight and help if i can. dont let UNCLE seun trash u oh!!!heeeheee

his plight is easy to understand, read the title

two people in love, the past stops one. The one being stopped is obviously him. he goes on in his post to mention he only has met the girl's kids, not her family, friends, or anyone else who would know more about her. Is there something here that only super super nigerians can see that I'm missing. The solution is obvious to me, the man should open is mouth. I cannot understand how he can claim to have learned so much from three bad marriages or not want to be hurt, and yet he refuses to find out about something like this. What is the point of his question then. Its not like we are mind readers and can tell him what he wants to know. We are not going to go out and investigate this woman for him. If he will not take the initiative to ask the question himself, then there is nothing we can really do.


Something must really be wrong with me this week. . i've had to modify so may harsh posts. . .

This is just a silly post