delishpot:
I will advice you to calm down, work on your anger issues and talk to her.

donbenedict:
Sometimes I wonder why couples change the moment they say I do.


Both of you lack understanding. Dats just it. I think u should adjust to her sexual needs. If she isn't the sex-needy type then you try to tolerate that. Afterall, u said it with your mouth "for better for worse" so please carry ur cross.


And as for wife, pls show this to her, there are a lot of demons out there wishing to destroy her marriage, it's left for her to allow that. If tomorrow u divorce her, please she should know it's entirely her fault, not her husband's.



I'm only tryn to be fair in my judgement!

caporia:


Thanks bro. Talking to her doesn't bring any change. We even end most of our discussions with crisis, sometimes we don't talk throughout the day.

caporia:


Thanks.

The only problem is that she doesn't like sex. When we first started our relationship, she sometimes wakes me up with sex. But now, touching her alone, if you see how she always throw my hands off her body? And if she agree, she only said yes to satisfy me not because she really needs it. Its so annoying.

Its makes me remember my ex and how we sex anytime anywhere! So you can imaging how it feels to now have a wife that doesn't like it.

caporia:
Am married with two kids.

Problem 1:
We always urgue as if we are forced to marry. I took time to study what the problem was and I discover that we have the same attitude (we get angry easily).

She's the type that doesn't want her opinion to come as the second choice. When she shout at me, I get so angry like "who is really the husband in this house?"


Problem 2:
If we had sex yesterday, she believe tomorrow should be public holiday. Even if she wants to reject sex, she doesn't say it with love. I will be like "am I your bf or do I have to create time table for sex?"


Problem 3:
When I have money and the house is flourishing with all good things, she use e for me (Yoruba sign to show respect or something like sir in English).
But when things are down, the respect disappear sharp sharp.


My plan:
1) I feel like divorcing her but whenever I think of my children, I always changed my mind because of divorce experience my mum had.

2) Her parent are such a lovely people and really care for me a lot. Am scared to see them sad if I divorce there daughter

3) Lastly, am a christian and I think its a sin to divorce let alone having another wife.

THIS ISSUE IS WHAT MAKES ME CRY DAILY THAT IS THIS HOW I WILL SPEND THE REST OF MY LIFE? SO PLEASE ADVICE ME ON WHAT TO DO.

BEN

layla129:
1. When you're both angry,be the matured one to calm down. It could be hard but just try...you can leave the scene of the argument too, it helps.
Talk to her with love and calmly. It maybe that you always make her feel her suggestions are useless...most Nigerian men feel their wives don't have anything to offer when it comes to making decisions.Even when you know that her suggestions are not ok, tell her calmly and give her reasons it won't work.

2. On sex, maybe you're not being calm or romantic about it. You just want her to go naked because she is your wife and its her responsibility... like you said "is she my gf or expect me to make a time table for sex". If this is not the case, talk to her and ask her why( don't say it in a way it causes misunderstanding )

Solution
Divorce is definitely not the solution . You both need to communicate more...talk about everything. In addition, maybe you both should see a marriage counsellor... it helps alot.
I'm sure when all these are done, the "e" she uses for you when there's money will permanent.