This thing called love is strong. I mean, is so mysterious that one just have to wonder how did it happen. You find yourself emotionally entangle to someone. And you both become friends.

You are happy. I mean, you can see happiness in the eyes of the person. And you are beginning to talk about the future. In the midst of the euphoria, the other person decide to pull off the plug and call it quit. No reasons, just like that the feelings disappeared. You are just left bewildered as to how and where it all went wrong.

July will make it a year the girl I love called it quit. It was hard, come-on this is someone I so so love dearly and made up my mind to spend my life with her. We are both in the same school.

Someone will say forget her and move on. There are so many girls who will love you unconditionally. Yes, I did. I moved on. As a matter of fact I got involved with some other girls. But I did it on playboy ground. Pretend you are in, play with her and move on. That's what I decided to do after I was hurt cos I see no reason why I should love any girl again till am set to settle down.

But one thing that refused to move on are the memories. Dam it. When am with someone else, her memories will be staring at me.

Recently she was back to the school whatsapp group I created in 2014. That's where we met actually. And all of a sudden, we began to chat and everything turns emotional. From both end, we could feel the feelings we felt back then. Walking down memory lane as if are still dating. And inside of me, I just wish we can get back again. But hey, she now has a serious date, she told me.

Today, I saw her friend she brings to the house then passing. and she came inside the house and have a meal with me. She couldn't stop talking how she missed my place, the food and the time we spent. We talked and she felt bad how the relationship ended and even asked if she can talk to her. But I said no. All of a sudden, the memories began flooding in that my head hurt.

Friends, how do I deal with it. Her memory just can't seems to go.

Wat u cant control will control u nd b ur master op i read a quote dat once u accept in ur heart dat somethings aint for u u will b free from all emotional pains forever

All these yeye Korean Love and mumu-like emotions



mtcheew..

**Rolls another Dank***

That's why I always love with my brain not heart.

halfricanadian:
Wat u cant control will control u nd b ur master op i read a quote dat once u accept in ur heart dat somethings aint for u u will b free from all emotional pains forever

hello

OP, perhaps you're not aware that there're people who'll get involved with an individual until he or she falls deeply in love with that person, then with a flimsy excuse or no reason at all, that person will drop the individual like a hot coal, leaving him to be lamenting. Then the person moves on to another victim. Such people are sadists who take delight in inflicting either physical pain or emotional pain or both.
It looks like you've encountered one.
She resurfaced, not because she loves you but in order to ensure that you're still under her captivity, i.e. still in deep love with her. She's just toying with your love . As a sadist, she derives immense pleasure in doing that!
The earlier you realize this and stop being her victim and forget about her accordingly, the better for you.
Life is too short to be wasted in Lamentations.

The moment she realizes that you're no longer allowing yourself to be her victim, she'll resurface with full force to get more involved with you, so as to recapture you and cause you the worst heartbreak in your life.
Beware!

obadizena:
The moment she realizes that you're no longer allowing yourself to be her victim, she'll resurface with full force to get more involved with you, so as to recapture you and cause you the worst heartbreak in your life.
Beware!

@ obadizena I wonder what you are not an expertise in


@OP Not an easy task though but U can try to always keep busy and when U find urself less busy and the tots rushing in U can plug in an earpiece listen to rock musics along side with playing game while Ure at it.

And avoid contact with her

Bad side is, as long as U still have something that links u with her the memory won't just go away.


Block her social media contacts,delete her no,if there is any gift she has given U try give them out........U know the rest

***blushing*** @Yewandequeen

obadizena:
***blushing***
@Yewandequeen

Yewandequeen:


@ obadizena I wonder what you are not an expertise in


@OP Not an easy task though but U can try to always keep busy and when U find urself less busy and the tots rushing in U can plug in an earpiece listen to rock musics along side with playing game while Ure at it.

And avoid contact with her

Bad side is, as long as U still have something that links u with her the memory won't just go away.


Block her social media contacts,delete her no,if there is any gift she has given U try give them out........U know the rest

Excellent tips!!!

There's even a more effective approach :
It works on the premise - Thought Generates Feelings
Behind every feeling, there's thought which matches that feeling. Change the thought and the feeling changes accordingly.

For instance, if he realizes and keeps affirming to himself, continually, that she's out to make his life miserable by toying with his love and keeping him lamenting perpetually, his feeling towards her will change.

I have been there so I really understand you but hey one year is long enough to get over it, nobody can talk to you about this, you are the only one that can talk to yourself and if you really wanna forget this girl you can, all you have to do is to make up you mind and remember there is nothing your body cannot carry just convince your mind and you are ready to go.

Avoid ruminating!

Yewandequeen:


@ obadizena I wonder what you are not an expertise in


...........

You know which field of knowledge I am inadequate for which I am seeking to be well trained by u, na...

obadizena:


You know which field of knowledge I am inadequate for which I am seeking to be well trained by u, na...

To the best of my knowledge,i have no slightest clue about what U talking about

Yewandequeen:


To the best of my knowledge,i have no slightest clue about what U talking about

Consensual friend-zoning.


**** disappears instantly ***

obadizena:


Consensual friend-zoning.


**** disappears instantly ***

Good u did

The lil chat between yewandequeen and obadizena sha

OP, I've been in ur shoes, I could say i was wearing a much more bigger size if u ask me. But then, if you like in my case did try your best to make things work and against your will things didn't. Calm yourself with the notion that she's not just meant to be the one. You dont really have to go all about trying to hate her, no, that process is almost always a futile one. Live your life hoping "the one" would come as long as you love and show love right.
On the case of deleting her contacts (both online platforms) uhmmm, well, i tried that, but then, what's the need? The number has aleays been in my head. You could edit her name and change it to her real name or something totally out of the whole romantic words and just avoid initiating conversations until you're convinced within you that your over her. It worked for me. Hope it does for you.

You could go through this my poem as well
https://www.nairaland.com/3167893/sometimes.

forandy:
The lil chat between yewandequeen and obadizena sha

OP, I've been in ur shoes, I could say i was wearing a much more bigger size if u ask me. But then, if you like in my case did try your best to make things work and against your will things didn't. Calm yourself with the notion that she's not just meant to be the one. You dont really have to go all about trying to hate her, no, that process is almost always a futile one. Live your life hoping "the one" would come as long as you love and show love right.
On the case of deleting her contacts (both online platforms) uhmmm, well, i tried that, but then, what's the need? The number has aleays been in my head. You could edit her name and change it to her real name or something totally out of the whole romantic words and just avoid initiating conversations until you're convinced within you that your over her. It worked for me. Hope it does for you.

You could go through this my poem as well
https://www.nairaland.com/3167893/sometimes.

Elaborate on the bolded pls

Yewandequeen:

Elaborate on the bolded pls

Lol, I should elaborate on that which you're fully aware of? It's like trying to answer a rhetorical question

forandy:


Lol, I should elaborate on that which you're fully aware of? It's like trying to answer a rhetorical question

Same old questions over and over again,,,,there are no special pills to heal emotinal trauma....it's just time....with time the feelings will ooz into thin air....trying mechanically to stop the feelins means you wanna fight nature, and you knw fighting nature is like throwing punches in the air....so, give it time bro and you will heal from it.

There is something called psychological deflection. You deliberately shut out unwanted memories by flooding ur mind with alternatives.
You should also avoid being idle or alone most of the time. Be involved in activities, hang around friends, join a social group (church etc), these would help in no little way