The Nigerian Political Cinematography always has a way of resonating in my solar plexus as an absurdist theatre. Yet Nigeria is replete of assiduous men and women, who, ordinarily, if they had found themselves in saner climes, would have transmogrified their immediate milieu and send multipliers across international boundaries. Imagine the Phillip Emeagwalis, Wole Soyinkas, Chinua Achebes, Emeka Anyaokus, Fela Anikulakpo-Kutis, and other great minds from this theatre of the absurd, called Nigeria?

Today, some of them are merely tolerated occasionally to entertain Nigerian audience in some grandiose public lectures or to deliver some ethnic or tribal association lectures to the home people. Even at that, the messages from such lectures are left behind in the venues after the clapping of hands and thunderous ovations from the invited eminent scholars. No lesson is learnt. Society continues groping in darkness.

This is the dilemma and an agonizing one at that of the new and latest fad in town called Project Re-branding Nigeria, which the current Minister of Information, Professor Dora Akunyili is currently prosecuting with the perfervidness of a blistering tomahawk. With Akunyili’s re-branding campaigns, I immediately provoke into consciousness previous national publicity blitzkriegs, such as the Andrew, I am checking out stunt and others before and after it. Great publicity stunts all of them. Now the fundamental question: why is Nigeria still a pariah state today in spite of all these monumental efforts at image-burnishing? Why are Nigerians still vilified, pilloried and scorned at international airports across the globe? The truth of the matter is that all previous approaches at moral re-armament just like this newfangled project, has adopted a “bottom-top schemata” rather than a “top-bottom” module.

If Nigerians must take Professor Dora Akunyili and her spin doctors seriously, it appears to me that her primary and first target audience should and must be the Nigerian Philistine political and rapacious elite class. Can Nigerians re-brand when the gap between the rich and the poor has assumed the status of a Mason-Dixon Line? Whilst would Nigerians not see the efforts of the Minister of Information as mere vacuous pontificating when the political class and its elites have not demonstrated practical commitment to rescuing the ship of state from avoidable cataracts and ox-bow lakes? Where is the visceral commitment of those saddled with the levers of power to genuine and fundamental electoral reforms and constitutional amendments? How has the 7-point agenda (or is it 2-point agenda now as prescribed by the central Bank Governor?) brought bread and butter to the table of teeming Nigerians? Has the Nigerian political class and its elites condescended from its hobbyhorse of a modus- Vivendi, reeking with ostentatious display of wealth, crass opportunism and vanitas vanitatum?

These are the core issues and Kantian categorical imperatives inter alia that the Minister of Information must address as a condition sine qua non, if Nigerians are to be on the same page with her. In my interface with Nigerians at home and in the Diaspora, they have become tired and sick of the sheer power arrogance that verges on megalomania that has been in surfeit display by their rulers ( not leaders) since we secured flag independence in 1960. We seek for power for its own sake. Project rebrand Nigeria must inculcate it into the psyche of those in the chalets of power and its aspirants that power in all its ramifications must be used for and on behalf of the people’s welfare. We must get back to that state of affairs, in which Nigerians themselves will come to a realization that power has returned to its natural purpose. The motley kingdoms and empires that flourished in Africa in the pre-colonial era flourished because power was used to defend the people. We must get back to that state of affairs if re-branding is to have any meaning and impact. The truth is that today, virtually all sectors of our socio-political life can do with a purgatorial metamorphosis. I hold the view and very strongly too that it is that purgatorial process which we must subject our political and elite class to that must come first before the re-branding project can succeed and gain the attention of Nigerians. Thus the Information Minister must now move outside the pale of sermonizing and oil the re-branding engine by ensuring that our political elites, starting from President Yar’Adua, down to his cabinet Ministers and the leadership and members of the National Assembly and all the various state governors and the entire political class, show genuine and patriotic commitment to the Pax Nigeriana of our dreams.

mailmalc:


Today, some of them are merely tolerated occasionally to entertain Nigerian audience in some grandiose public lectures or to deliver some ethnic or tribal association lectures to the home people. Even at that, the messages from such lectures are left behind in the venues after the clapping of hands and thunderous ovations from the invited eminent scholars. No lesson is learnt. Society continues groping in darkness.

This is the dilemma and an agonizing one at that of the new and latest fad in town called Project Re-branding Nigeria, which the current Minister of Information, Professor Dora Akunyili is currently prosecuting with the perfervidness of a blistering tomahawk. With Akunyili’s re-branding campaigns, I immediately provoke into consciousness previous [b]national publicity blitzkriegs, such as the Andrew, I am checking out stunt and others before and after it. Great publicity stunts all of them. Now the fundamental question: why is Nigeria still a pariah state today in spite of all these monumental efforts at image-burnishing? Why are Nigerians still vilified, pilloried and scorned at international airports across the globe? The truth of the matter is that all previous approaches at moral re-armament just like this newfangled project, has adopted a “bottom-top schemata” rather than a “top-bottom” module.[/b]

If Nigerians must take Professor Dora Akunyili and [size=13pt]her spin doctors[/size] seriously, it appears to me that her primary and first target audience should and must be the Nigerian Philistine political and rapacious elite class. Can Nigerians re-brand when the gap between the rich and the poor has assumed the status of a Mason-Dixon Line? Whilst would Nigerians not see the efforts of the Minister of Information as mere vacuous pontificating when the political class and its elites have not demonstrated practical commitment to rescuing the ship of state from avoidable cataracts and ox-bow lakes? Where is the visceral commitment of those saddled with the levers of power to genuine and fundamental electoral reforms and constitutional amendments? How has the 7-point agenda (or is it 2-point agenda now as prescribed by the central Bank Governor?) brought bread and butter to the table of teeming Nigerians? Has the Nigerian political class and its elites condescended from its hobbyhorse of a modus- Vivendi, reeking with ostentatious display of wealth, crass opportunism and vanitas vanitatum?

[b]These are the core issues and Kantian categorical imperatives inter alia that the Minister of Information must address as a condition sine qua non, if Nigerians are to be on the same page with her. In my interface with Nigerians at home and in the Diaspora, they have become tired and sick of the sheer power arrogance that verges on megalomania that has been in surfeit display by their rulers ( not leaders) since we secured flag independence in 1960. We seek for power for its own sake. Project rebrand Nigeria must inculcate it into the psyche of those in the chalets of power and its aspirants that power in all its ramifications must be used for and on behalf of the people’s welfare. We must get back to that state of affairs, in which Nigerians themselves will come to a realization that power has returned to its natural purpose. The motley kingdoms and empires that flourished in Africa in the pre-colonial era flourished because power was used to defend the people. We must get back to that state of affairs if re-branding is to have any meaning and impact. The truth is that today, virtually all sectors of our socio-political life can do with a purgatorial metamorphosis.[/b] I hold the view and very strongly too that it is that purgatorial process which we must subject our political and elite class to that must come first before the re-branding project can succeed and gain the attention of Nigerians. Thus the Information Minister must now move outside the pale of sermonizing and oil the re-branding engine by ensuring that our political elites, starting from President Yar’Adua, down to his cabinet Ministers and the leadership and members of the National Assembly and all the various state governors and the entire political class, show genuine and patriotic commitment to the Pax Nigeriana of our dreams.

brilliant!!
_{(even though I had to consult my dictionary to decode most half of it)}

OMG i have laughed too much this night/morning

i have to go n sleep oooh

national publicity blitzkriegs

Now i feel like listening to The Ramones (Blitzkrieg pop)!

This man is the only genuine politician out there. The searchlight needs to be shone on the so-called elite and ruling classes, not some fake re-branding.
Patrick Obahiagbon might have his own unique style, but he has always been intelligent, radical; true to his morality and cause; I hope he won't be the next one in exile like Ribadu.

^^^^^ What does "Iyama" mean in Ijaw?

This is the best thing I've read in months. This guy is my idol.

Even though his English is suspect. This is the best piece I have heard form him.

There is truth and intelligence behind all this big grammar.

Truth or not  what is the point when more than 80% of the population don't have a clue what he is on about and  I doubt everyone has a dictionary lying around.
He should communicate in simple english. Bush man but great comedy value

@ post,

this is not about the political gramatigiology but is all about the content of the message,

where should the re-branding stuff start from ,

it should be closing up the gap between the poor and the rich, men am hungry

Brilliant!!!
The grammar was intersparsed with understandable words. The lexicogrammatical construct is simply superb, anti-incongruos and pro-humorous.

This sure is a brilliant piece. He was only being a realist here wiv regards the rebranding project but i mean he's got his own dictionary

A briiliant piece from the Master of bombast.

why is Nigeria still a pariah state today in spite of all these monumental efforts at image-burnishing? Why are Nigerians still vilified, pilloried and scorned at international airports across the globe? The truth of the matter is that all previous approaches at moral re-armament just like this newfangled project, has adopted a “bottom-top schemata” rather than a “top-bottom” module.

[b] I stopped reading after the bit above.

Apologies for picking on this little extract, but it is very important. Nigerians who purport to be intelligent ought to act more responsibly or select their words more carefully. There are no excuses for maltreatment of Nigerians anywhere. There can be no justification and certainly not the puerile one implying Nigerians are maltreated for their own good, which is the indirect implication one is forced to draw from the argument that the state of politics in Nigeria causes these unjust actions against our people abroad. Unless you mean the government does not protests on our behalf as vehemently as it should due to its ineffectiveness.

As an aside, I travel often and when I can, I make it known I am Nigerian but I have unfortunately so far not been maltreated. I say unfortunate because the person who goes beyond their rightful duty, informed by some harebrained attitude, would rue that day. But then again I do not habitually visit the barbaric and “lawless” lands of Africa- North, South, East or West of Nigeria - or those of Asia and Eastern Europe.
[/b]

@post

I believe there is no one that has the monoply of the usage of "heavy" Vocabulary however we cant all be speaking like robots.

dis Patrick Obahiagbon of a guy, na real showman. him been dey use grammer for attention since university days. him been dey use am like play like play, but de ting don become part of him fiber. de tings wey him talk here na common knowledge, even de blind man understand those facts wey him point out.

my question for Obahiagbon be dis: how many legislations you don introduce to address the issues wey you talk about. you dey there where you fit take action, and if ya actions bold, Nigerians go rally around you. people already like you because of de comic relief wey you dey provide.

as a legislator, wettin you don do? na pot dey call kettle black. methinks Dora dey more effective than you people for assembly.

As much as I agree that Dora Akunyili has holes in a campaign of rebranding Nigerian, I solemnly also believe that your write up Mr. Honorable has a lot of chasms.

The first is that the leaders of motley kingdoms you talked about are same ones ruling us now however indirectly. This heterogeneous people are well organized and can mutate into any state they like. They have their elite partner in other jurisdiction. If you send a Moses to them it will seem as if you are punishing then and they will begin to demand their rights.

They have agents as they themselves are agents of imperialism. The motley rulers fascist they are the same people that sold their people to slavery. They the rulers fed on the backs of the people. This moral gorge has not been corrected and restitution to the masses has not been made to the sons and daughters of the sold slaves.

The chief are agents of hardship to the masses. The tribe card played when something is about to be done right has the hand of all the Kings (ring leader) and Chiefs (thieves). The style of thievery of the traditional elite from all across the state called Nigeria is phenomenal. Mr. Honorable the political elite is an offshoot of what has happened in the years of slavery. If we did not have oil these Parasitic Elite will still sell human beings.

Until they the traditional elite pay back the monies or the equivalents of the people sold to slavery, I say it is an anathema to be called a king in any part of Africa. Restitution must be internal. Our kings were the ones that made it easy for us to be impoverished they same kings are the ones that this thieving political parasitic Elites run to when they are in the red.

Not until we have rudimentary law and enforcement systems that is moral and this can only be brought about a creation of a new type of Elite. The Elite of young under aged Nigerians that have not been corrupted by want. We must POLITICALLY ENGINEER THE SOCIAL HIERACHY of Nigeria.

It is looking like the old Nigerian is disillusioned to the point of no return. I must say at this point that to create a counter Elite we must be ready to die as some of those that did so before died. They say the children are the future so when does the future start? My friend it STARTS NOW.

What we must do is to link Education Directly to Work. The thinking of most Africans is that education Equals money. But we must reengineer our minds to say Education equals Work (service) equals wealth.


We must use our youth in

1) Policing
2) Building of houses and of new cities
3) Small dams for power
4) Irrigation dams
5) Farming
6) Cleaning
7) Teaching
Health care and education
9) Build of roads
I believe in “on the Job” training.
If the youth build they would have a sense of nationalism. To think of rebranding from the top is a waste of time. Every leader emerges from the sea of the people.

Lwkm!

Damn! I need a Webster-blitzkriegs Dictionary.

This is crazy!.

unfortunately we are just applauding his speech like he stressed and doing nothing about it

i feel your burden Honorable!
but come to think of it even though its hard for us to comprehend all the dictions he used but we all know he is very passionate with the Nation Nigeria he is always active in the house
come to think of those bastards who are in the House who dont talk at all or sponsor bills they are just bench wormers and never do-wells
i really appreciate him
i have an asshole in my constituency who for the past six years he has never spoken at the floor of the house also he has done absolutely noting for the community he came out from!
so lets praise honourable Patrick!

This man is in a world of his own.