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Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? - Family (7) - Nairaland

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Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Observer25: 5:26am On Aug 07, 2016
orgasticdance:

Probably. But why does anyone need more than a year to reach that conclusion? Even if my relationship ends today it won't change my larger perspective that when women are free it benefits society as a whole (men included)!I value the freedoms women in America enjoy. Economic and Social. Nigeria is one of the worst places in the world to be a woman.

My friend relax..don't let this your new found American love get so much into your head. How can you say Nigeria is one of the worst places in the world to be a woman? You serious? What you talking about? Even the ladies here in this forum will disagree with you.
And yes..one year is too soon to reach a conclusion about women in the US/UK. Give it sometime!

8 Likes

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by orgasticdance: 5:31am On Aug 07, 2016
.

3 Likes

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by macotrading72(m): 5:31am On Aug 07, 2016
Nancy2016:


You have just explained why some Naija men go home to get married. They don't want to marry their equals. They don't want exposed and enlightened woman who know their rights. All those posters saying that it's because the girls are promiscuous, this shows the calibre of people you guys are. You meet these "gold-diggers" because you don't interact with women of substance. All my friends are educated, independent women with good careers. A lot of Nigerian women are very successful and doing very well for themselves. This sometimes intimidates guys especially those who haven't progressed in life.
Also there are a lot of weddings between Nigerians based abroad.
on point
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Nobody: 5:41am On Aug 07, 2016
orgasticdance:

And listing extreme examples proves your point?! Anyone can play that game

those are not extreme examples - those are the norm /culture in the countries concerned. these are not extreme examples - it is what happens

stop highlighting your ignorance

women cannot drive or go about without a male escort in saudi arabia -
rape as punishment is a tradition in parts of india
honor killings are very big in pakistan and parts of the middle east
so is 'sharp water' - using acid on 'stubborn' women
you cannot say you do not know who malala is

so please stop this pathetic whining. you are a woman in nigeria who can go to school, switch boyfriends , Bleep around , trash talk, get pregnant out of wedlock, drive a car , own your company, rise within your employer organization. . .

yes nigeria is a patriachial society with a lot of power skewed towards men.

but it is nowhere near one of the worst places in the world to be a woman

that is hyperbolic, hyperfeminist ignorance of the highest order and you should be ashamed that you posted such tripe

28 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by eyinjuege: 5:43am On Aug 07, 2016
HMZi:
Green card.
White pussy's a different delicacy.
Mixed breed kids.et al

Are mixed kids better than full black kids?
Are you saying mixed men/half caste men are better than you?

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Naturalized(m): 5:55am On Aug 07, 2016
Mcjai:



Don't be surprised when you find out that amazon girl of his is actually a Tranny with real dick.

grin

You took it out of my mouth.
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by madridsta007(m): 5:56am On Aug 07, 2016
ojsmscom:
The answer is obvious. Many of them there have married their oyibo wives already... So if they also marry a second wife who also resides there... Their visa benefactor will dictate easily

Not really true. Many of the black girls also have the 'paper', that the white girls have. But the black guys prefer the white women or a black lady in Nigeria.

It's about character. That's what they don't have. When it's time, I will rather look for a Nigerian lady in Nigeria— and I do not care about the means even if I find her on social media— than to go for a Nigerian lady here. Unless that lady is brought up in Nigeria too.

They are just too arrogant and brash.

2 Likes

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by staffingx: 6:01am On Aug 07, 2016
waltinnovers:
Majority of Nigerian girls or ladies over there are runs babe, they fvck to live, and they don't hid it and these guys know very well what they are doing, so if they finally one to marry, the will come back here even though the ones here do fvck, it be seen as a local fvck still have some respect internationally but international fvcker don't have any more respect. They are it is finished as Jesus said.
Ka Chineke mesieee okwu
Saalam

Lol
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by MrPresident1: 6:09am On Aug 07, 2016
bigfrancis21:


The issue is not with typical Nigerian men not standing such 'rich', 'confident' or 'independent' lady but it is the totally different attitude or behaviour that comes with such women when they get to have these things. Most lose their humility, subservience etc. for any man and begin to have unrealistic expectations about their relations with men. With Western feminism being propagated worldwide via Hollywood movies, women in traditional patriarchal countries are catching wind of this. I am not against equal rights for women whatsoever. Women should be allowed to do the same things men do in the society but truth be told there are certain roles which are best played by men (leadership, innovation, development etc.) and some roles which are best played by women (raising the great men and women of the world, mediation, empathy, child rearing etc). To be honest, some women are not able to keep a cool head when they are in power or in possession of great wealth, and with the typical Nigerian man who is traditionally raised to be a man in his society and who knows his role as a man in the society, this is the major issue they have with these 'independent' women. Time after time, what women gain by being feminist or 'independent' in terms of financial or material success, they lose in their private life. 50-50. No man worth his onions (by this I mean who knows he is a man, knows his role in the society and takes pride in being a man) would want to settle with a feminist-charged woman who want to see the roles reversed in the house. This explains why most of them remain single, because they find it difficult to submit to a man in a relationship. Time after time, they have unrealistic expectations of relationships should be, with feminism all over the place. Of course, there are some men who are not too ambitious, who would have no problem pairing up with feminist women and not mind being house husbands and submitting to their wives who become the primary financial caregiver. In case you don't know, many ladies in America, especially black ladies, are so feminist that they want to be on top in a relationship, they want to be the man in the relationship instead, they are always right and never wrong, they would never admit to being sorry for anything even when they know they were wrong, they want to control you and order you around but WOULD NEVER TRY TO LET YOU CONTROL THEM, they view being a woman as being weak and they try to be men instead. They leave the women they were created to be and try to be men instead. Any MAN worth his onions would never want such a woman as a spouse and MEN go off looking for more traditional/submissive women as partners and the feminist ones-man-trying-to-be are left single for most of their lives. Feminism has been identified as one of the greatest destructive forces in the black american community. In the AA community, about 72% of mothers are single mothers, raising families single-handed. Most of them are unable to keep a man or barely know how to keep a spouse, barely know that relationships are mutual, barely know the sacrifices they would have to make as wives/female spouse to keep a relationship going, etc. They expect to be treated good all the time by their man, or as 'queens' that they like to call it, but never feel obliged to treat their man good in return. Many don't realize that you give to receive. Affection does not flow in one direction only, it goes both ways. With feminism, coupled with the unavailability of eligible good black men, most black american women expect to remain single for all their lives, having only boyfriends here and there as life goes on. In marriages many barely know their roles as wives, or the sacrifices wives make in a marriage, because they grew up in single-mom households and never saw their moms being wives to their dads or step-dads to learn from them, and the marriages they have, if any, barely last. Funny enough, feminism started with white European females but white American ladies till today are more subservient, womanly, and know their roles as wives than black women.

Honestly, if a woman can be wealthy, comfortable and still remain humble or submit to her spouse, cook for him, etc. most men would not have any problem with that. A good man will try to support such woman in her endeavours. No man wants a woman who tries to challenge his status as a man every time, who tries to be the 'man' instead etc. A good example of such women is Dr. Ngozi Iweala, a great woman with an international status who never rubs her success as woman on her husband's face or tries to challenge him or be on top of him because she is more successful than him. These women realize that outside their matrimonial home, they can charge up to men whatsoever but once they step foot in their house, their spouse is in charge and they submit. Check this out: the most successful marriages in America today, a country with high divorce rates where 50% of marriages end up in divorce, are still those ones that follow the traditional system of beliefs where the male is the primary financial giver and the female is the primary child care giver at home either as full time housewives or career mothers. That should tell you something.

Today you make sense well well. Anytime you write your epistles without bias against the Mighty and Imperial Yoruba, you make sense. grin
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by holluphemydavid(m): 6:30am On Aug 07, 2016
adorablevic:
They think most of d girls are spoilt....and so dey comeover here looking for fresh ones not knowing d ones over here are worse sad
Not all d girls here are dat spoil, B4 d guy will wnt to marry her here, he must av knw little abt her, or any of his relatives must av knw somtin abt d guy B4 any Nigerian man can come from oversea to marry a Nigerian lady. My thought
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by orgasticdance: 6:32am On Aug 07, 2016
.

1 Like

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Reference(m): 6:33am On Aug 07, 2016
I believe it is because there is a deep dichotomy between the quality of diasporans with high quality individuals in the minority. The first question that should be asked by a potential suitor is, why is the fellow there in the first place. The honest reasons most will profer will not make for good, lasting relationships if scrutinized properly.
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by humilitypays(m): 6:44am On Aug 07, 2016
I will advice Nigerian ladies living abroad to also start thinking like the Nigerian guys live abroad: go back to Nigeria and get yourself a sweet Naija guy in Naija to marry instead of living a lonely miserable life in abroad forming feminist that white ladies are getting tired of already, but will Nigerian ladies do this Hell NO! cheesy yyy

Because Nigerian ladies only think forward, never think back for good, it's not easy to be a Nigerian girl o, so much drama till death lol

8 Likes

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Nobody: 7:01am On Aug 07, 2016
Hmm to me, i think they belive the av knw evrytin abt dem.
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Deepfreezer(m): 7:01am On Aug 07, 2016
How can I get married to someone who is on the same mission with me?
U dey reason buy FORD SUV send back home Naija babe go dey reason buy Bugatti send too.
The ones that luckily hv good jobs are so proud of themselves. Pride equals Naija babes, they eventually end up getting married when they are old to a struggling guy back home thou.

1 Like

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by ultimate73(m): 7:02am On Aug 07, 2016
green card hustle
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by sweetilicious(f): 7:04am On Aug 07, 2016
DICKtator:
They travel abroad, start growing wings and are no longer submissive.

If the guy does anyhow they call police

When they divorce him ,they get all his stuffs

They become overexposed and carefree
They lose the African woman identity Fela spoke about

Not all though, some are just cool and virtuous.
And some of those that marry from Nigeria,they prefer leaving their wives in Nigeria so they don't have stories that touches to share!!!
Not all though,there are always exceptions to every case.



grin grin grin grin
Yeah i think you are right. You know African values are so different from foreign ones. Even some that Nigerian women here would go outside and see the freedom and go out of track of what its entails to build a family. Even some ladies here are pretenders. Its a 50:50 scenario.Like the story of a close relative whom got someone he wanted to marry but as he came back and saw his estranged wife who was so hot and charmy as he said. He left the other and went for the hotter one because he cared about societal preference. Just to be hailed by his friends. Without knowing the lady wasn't really family oriented but was looking for better life. She never liked him but was a wolf in sheeps clothing. She divorced him, now she has brought all her people there. So you see? Getting married to the ones here is also another risk because girls can be very good to any guy once he stays outside the country be it Ghana self. And its another challenge for those that wish to marry home based ladies too.

2 Likes

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by cyrilamx(m): 7:13am On Aug 07, 2016
adorablevic:
They think most of d girls are spoilt....and so dey comeover here looking for fresh ones not knowing d ones over here are worse sad
heheheh...are u one of the worst ones here @home?
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by sweetilicious(f): 7:18am On Aug 07, 2016
peter1994:
In America: I think it has something to do with a believe that they are often spoilt by the Gender equality thing (won't be loyal)

In Europe esp. Italy, Poland, Spain and Germany, There is a believe that our ladies do all sorts of illicit Jobs including Asset Marketing / Commercial sex work (Ash)

Those in Asia Any Single lady wen get mind to go Chinko fit do anything o smiley
Lol your analysis tho. For me o, Maybe i will not acceptable the word gender equality because men and women can never be equal but different. I just shun violence and abuse against women.I also think everyone should too because we all have those women we wish to protect sometimes. Just don't shrink a lady just because she is a lady. Just the same way for ladies too.

1 Like

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by swaggprofessor(m): 7:23am On Aug 07, 2016
SO if u aaaaassssskkkkk meeeeeeeee Na who I go aaaaassssskkkkk!!!!!! the mata u yarn sooo it tell wey e start.........
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Nobody: 7:28am On Aug 07, 2016
Bisjosh:
undecided
Cos naija men like ladies they can boss around but they can't do it with the ones over there grin tongue
so true..but the ball is in your court...be submissive and married or be stubborn and single...oya what is 'happily ever after' worth to you?
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by otipoju(m): 7:32am On Aug 07, 2016
bigfrancis21:


The issue is not with typical Nigerian men not standing such 'rich', 'confident' or 'independent' lady but it is the totally different attitude or behaviour that comes with such women when they get to have these things. Most lose their humility, subservience etc. for any man and begin to have unrealistic expectations about their relations with men. With Western feminism being propagated worldwide via Hollywood movies, women in traditional patriarchal countries are catching wind of this. I am not against equal rights for women whatsoever. Women should be allowed to do the same things men do in the society but truth be told there are certain roles which are best played by men (leadership, innovation, development etc.) and some roles which are best played by women (raising the great men and women of the world, mediation, empathy, child rearing etc). To be honest, some women are not able to keep a cool head when they are in power or in possession of great wealth, and with the typical Nigerian man who is traditionally raised to be a man in his society and who knows his role as a man in the society, this is the major issue they have with these 'independent' women. Time after time, what women gain by being feminist or 'independent' in terms of financial or material success, they lose in their private life. 50-50. No man worth his onions (by this I mean who knows he is a man, knows his role in the society and takes pride in being a man) would want to settle with a feminist-charged woman who want to see the roles reversed in the house. This explains why most of them remain single, because they find it difficult to submit to a man in a relationship. Time after time, they have unrealistic expectations of relationships should be, with feminism all over the place. Of course, there are some men who are not too ambitious, who would have no problem pairing up with feminist women and not mind being house husbands and submitting to their wives who become the primary financial caregiver. In case you don't know, many ladies in America, especially black ladies, are so feminist that they want to be on top in a relationship, they want to be the man in the relationship instead, they are always right and never wrong, they would never admit to being sorry for anything even when they know they were wrong, they want to control you and order you around but WOULD NEVER TRY TO LET YOU CONTROL THEM, they view being a woman as being weak and they try to be men instead. They leave the women they were created to be and try to be men instead. Any MAN worth his onions would never want such a woman as a spouse and MEN go off looking for more traditional/submissive women as partners and the feminist ones-man-trying-to-be are left single for most of their lives. Feminism has been identified as one of the greatest destructive forces in the black american community. In the AA community, about 72% of mothers are single mothers, raising families single-handed. Most of them are unable to keep a man or barely know how to keep a spouse, barely know that relationships are mutual, barely know the sacrifices they would have to make as wives/female spouse to keep a relationship going, etc. They expect to be treated good all the time by their man, or as 'queens' that they like to call it, but never feel obliged to treat their man good in return. Many don't realize that you give to receive. Affection does not flow in one direction only, it goes both ways. With feminism, coupled with the unavailability of eligible good black men, most black american women expect to remain single for all their lives, having only boyfriends here and there as life goes on. In marriages many barely know their roles as wives, or the sacrifices wives make in a marriage, because they grew up in single-mom households and never saw their moms being wives to their dads or step-dads to learn from them, and the marriages they have, if any, barely last. Funny enough, feminism started with white European females but white American ladies till today are more subservient, womanly, and know their roles as wives than black women.

Honestly, if a woman can be wealthy, comfortable and still remain humble or submit to her spouse, cook for him, etc. most men would not have any problem with that. A good man will try to support such woman in her endeavours. No man wants a woman who tries to challenge his status as a man every time, who tries to be the 'man' instead etc. A good example of such women is Dr. Ngozi Iweala, a great woman with an international status who never rubs her success as woman on her husband's face or tries to challenge him or be on top of him because she is more successful than him. These women realize that outside their matrimonial home, they can charge up to men whatsoever but once they step foot in their house, their spouse is in charge and they submit. Check this out: the most successful marriages in America today, a country with high divorce rates where 50% of marriages end up in divorce, are still those ones that follow the traditional system of beliefs where the male is the primary financial giver and the female is the primary child care giver at home either as full time housewives or career mothers. That should tell you something.

Big Francis...I had to gi check your profile cause you are an insider. You analyses is spot on. You know the system well....

from a married brother in the DFW metroplex.

4 Likes

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by coolviv: 7:37am On Aug 07, 2016
Na wa o. All d analysis here tire person. As someone who has a nigerian friend who went abroad and became a baby mama and still married a nigerian abroad, I can say most of u are wrong or heavily biased.

Fact is there are bad men and bad women and vice versa. Pray to God for a good spouse because there are now as many lonely divorced single men as there are women. Sleeping around makes one lonelier as ur heart knows they don't really care about u and won't be there for u if u fall to bad times. Truly, there is no joy as being with someone who loves u for real and has got ur back at all times.

It is well.

5 Likes

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Nobody: 7:39am On Aug 07, 2016
humilitypays:
I will advice Nigerian ladies living abroad to also start thinking like the Nigerian guys live abroad: go back to Nigeria and get yourself a sweet Naija guy in Naija to marry instead of living a lonely miserable life in abroad forming feminist that white ladies are getting tired of already, but will Nigerian ladies do this Hell NO! cheesy yyy

Because Nigerian ladies only think forward, never think back for good, it's not easy to be a Nigerian girl o, so much drama till death lol
even your scenario doesn't work; a feminist woman coming to marry a manly Nigerian man is a recipe for disaster...

2 Likes

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by WhatOnEarth: 7:42am On Aug 07, 2016
kyaagbanairaland:
How is a lady wife material. I don't get. Every lady is thesame to me. If a lady truly loves a guy she'll calm down for d guy. Even chronic runs girls end up becoming good wives if they see a man they truly love.

That is the silver lining, as they call it. But problem is most of them never find the one they truly love because they put their 'rights' ahead of their hearts.

1 Like

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Tobitrueman(m): 7:46am On Aug 07, 2016
These said it all

1 Like

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Nobody: 7:54am On Aug 07, 2016
martineverest:
....because,most nigerians men abroad are lazy illegal immigrants,who are looking for who to leech on and/or get green card/stay permit thru such ppl.....most times,nigerian women dont posses such qualites.other times,nigerian women who posses such qualities know nigerian men's ulterior motives.so they shun the them( nigerian men) so as not to fall victims.


FACT:in nigeria,women are the major gold-diggers.in abroad,nigerian men are better gold,silver and diamond diggers.
bro if you get chance cross to Europe, you no go cross?
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Nobody: 7:57am On Aug 07, 2016
The truth is I can't even allow my brother to marry a woman that lives abroad but I can and also encourage my sister to do so
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by gabbytabby: 8:04am On Aug 07, 2016
Most black men all over who do this tend to because they cannot get the quality of wonen they want cos they do not quite measure up. Occasionally a 50 or 60 something divorced man and often not gainfully employed wants a 20 or 30 something woman to look after him in his old age.

Often times a poorly or uneducated man wants to marry a very highly educated woman. They are only able to do this by going home to get a suffering and smiling sister that would like an opportunity to better herself. They are often times stuck with a despirado and come complaining after all I have done for you.

There are also the control warlords hiding behind submission to essentially bully. Often times they get their just reward even from the village girl.

Orubebe01:
Just wondering why majority of them always rush back home to marry when there are handful of Nigerian ladies where they reside. Does it mean that none of them are wife material or what.

3 Likes

Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Nobody: 8:07am On Aug 07, 2016
Wow!, now I know why,i have always wondered why myself, I have alot of them in my area married to men living abroad while they stay here and make babies.With all this analysis I am seeing, I for one won't advice my brother to marry over there but I won't advice my sister to marry a guy living abroad except he is willing to take her back with him, based on what I have seen
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by ClintonDal(m): 8:18am On Aug 07, 2016
Because we have seen it all. Plus the things they do over there, especially in Asia where the Asians hardly interact with the female blacks.
Re: Why Is It That Nigerians Abroad Hardly Marry Nigerian Ladies Over There? by Adefemiaderoju1: 8:31am On Aug 07, 2016
To me personally I think it gender equality thing and the welfare government giving to them due to this they know nothing men can say or do them, have seen lots cases where they threw out their husband out of the house its just so unfortunate that we men find ourselves in this

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