pretty050:
individual differences (home training) , @op there nothing wrong with saying thank u ma
growing up we were not taught to say thank you after a meal.
But I noticed our family friends especially those from the eastern part of Nigeria say 'thank you mummy 'thank u daddy ' after eating, so as visitors I thank my host,
we still don't practice that in our family .

I rmb visiting frnds when I was younger and see them say thank you after meals, I got home and tried it the first time and my parents wia looking at me like what is wrong with dis one. Eventually one day my dad told me to stop he cldnt understand why I would thank him after every meal. He said something like will I come and thank him in the office if I ate and he was not around.

After reading all the advice given, you will think most Nigerians are the most courteous of people.

They will push you on the street and ask if you no see road.

Everyday the same people go dey curse President wey fit be dem Granpapa.

Hypocrisy.

pocohantas:
Will you be asking this question if it were your mum?
If no? Then the question is unwarranted.


On Jan 23rd, your wife was about putting to bed
https://www.nairaland.com/3588885/tb-joshua-undoubtedly-one-gods#53065688


Jan 24th, you were already sucking your helps' boobs?
https://www.nairaland.com/3589656/wonder-why-women-hard

Troll.

Oshey, federal bereau of investigation

FromZeroToHero:
Yes, it's necessary. She's your elder and courtesy demands you thank your elders after eating at home. It won't take anything away from you. Be respectful bro.

Why only eating? He should thank her for everything now.....abi?

If he finish drinking water he should say "thank ma"

If he finish watching television he should "thank ma"

pocohantas:
Will you be asking this question if it were your mum?
If no? Then the question is unwarranted.


On Jan 23rd, your wife was about putting to bed
https://www.nairaland.com/3588885/tb-joshua-undoubtedly-one-gods#53065688


Jan 24th, you were already sucking your helps' boobs?
https://www.nairaland.com/3589656/wonder-why-women-hard

Troll.

I think its a joke if not you were caught a day after delivery tasting something yet you can't say Thank you to your wife that did not pour hot water on you. This must be a joke but if it is culture I am hearing it for the first time.

In another view, your wife grew up telling mummy, thank you for the meal so after she prepared the meal and her mummy was there she rewined back to the days that it was disrespect not to say thank you to mummy. I think it should be to your wife and probably say thank you to your Mother in law for joining you in enjoying the meal.

alfredo4u:
House, just needed candid advise, my mother Inlaw is in my place for omugo/visit.

Just this evening my wife served me my dinner and after finish eating I left the parlour to the bed room, my wife came in and said why didn't I even say thank ma to her mother.

Pls kindly advise becos I nearly took offence about it.

lol i would have said next time be sure to understand the thought process of the person you marry but alas...no next time for you bro.

Nigerians and their love for unnecessary culture.

Newsflash!!: Being elderly does not absolve you from being and behaving like a normal human being. Regardless of your age or status, when you collect or receive something from someone, you are the one to say thank you. If God Almighty rewards us for our service which is obligatory in the first place, then why should you thank your mother inlaw for the mere fact of her presence in the room?

Why do africans crave honor so much??

As children we were taught to say thank you to the person who provided the meal, so if it was at home we would thank our parents and if it was an aunty's house, we would thank our aunty and uncle but not our parents.

At the end of the day though, OP, my advice to you is to prioritize the peace of your home. Say the thank you and let them glory in it.

mrjojo:
Lol, funny as this is, some years ago I was in a neighbor's house and they were eating, after they were done, the 3 kids knelt down and was thanking the parent, y'all need to see how surprised I was. I asked the eldest son why they were thanking, and he said "for eating na". Lol.
Btw they are from edo state.

Me no dey thank anybody o, except you serve me.

Ha ha ha .... Ninja nd comedy. Abeg make u con tel all dis Akata boys nd girls dem wey dey here dat kind tin....? Tnx 4 wa.......t isn't dat ur responsibility Jones....? Lol.........

ziga:
After reading all the advice given, you will think most Nigerians are the most courteous of people.

They will push you on the street and ask if you no see road.

Everyday the same people go dey curse President wey fit be dem Granpapa.

Hypocrisy.

Azin! I just dey laugh as i dey read their comments!

Hypocrites everywhere

I checked your references, you must be smart. Please commit your positive gifts to Nigeria

pocohantas:
Will you be asking this question if it were your mum?
If no? Then the question is unwarranted.


On Jan 23rd, your wife was about putting to bed
https://www.nairaland.com/3588885/tb-joshua-undoubtedly-one-gods#53065688


Jan 24th, you were already sucking your helps' boobs?
https://www.nairaland.com/3589656/wonder-why-women-hard

Troll.

It's called commonsense but in your own case it is not common. Get some sense bro.

LesbianBoy:


Why only eating? He should thank her for everything now.....abi?

If he finish drinking water he should say "thank ma"

If he finish watching television he should "thank ma"

Even in restaurant i will say "thank you" come and beat me then

.

Guess the "thank ma" should be an appreciation that she gave birth to a wonderful Cook.

Don't mind the thanks for what campaigners, I thank my wife after every meal together or alone at home.. even at the eatery I say thanks for the meal.

quote author=mastermaestro post=54917949]

Where are you from, Mr Joe? It's common table manners in many Nigerian homes to thank the elderly person near you after having a meal irrespective of who financed the meal. Unless you grew apart from a home of elder folks, this isn't news! At an eatery, it's unnecessary. But in a home, it's a norm. Obedience, love and honour are the pillars of a successful home!

An obligation? Never. It's a sign of honour. This world is easy! Men make it difficult to live in![/quote]

alfredo4u:
From what I deduce from all this advice.....

Is not by force to say thank ma, its by choice.

Thanks

Are u not from east?...
There is nothing there.. its no big deal to say thank u ma

in my tradition urhobo. we say thank you to elders even before eating not withstanding who foots the bill on the meal. In return the elder will say "Doh" meaning welldone . This is the tradition in most Niger Delta tribes.
But in some tradition its not so. OP it depends on where your mother in law is from, so simply give what is ceaser's to ceaser.

Sharap and say the Damn thank you even when its not from ur miserable heart

FromZeroToHero:
It's called commonsense but in your own case it is not common. Get some sense bro.

Youngman, its you that don't have sense!

Like i asked why say "thank ma" to her after eating only? He should greet for everything now!

There is difference btw "mumuness" and respect!

You can't show some respect to your wife's mother yet you would expect your wife to carry your own mothers matter òn her head !

If it wasn't the MIL that prepared the meal or served you, simple 'goodnight ma' should be enough. Wouldn't she even feel embarrassed when you thank her for something she had no input in? This is really awkward

Dis is a case of simpu cutsi saying the thank ma wouldn't hurt anyone but rather improve an already existing relationship

Wow! I'm seeing/hearing this for the first time. I wasn't taught this! I only thank those who prepared the food. But from the contributions I've seen so far I think thanking my mother-in-law after having the meal wouldn't be a bad idea even if she didn't foot the bill or prepare the meal. Afterall, she gave birth to my wife who prepared the food. Thanking her won't take a hair from my body.

Yes.

Woe betide me If I eat my Future mother in-law food and I don't say thank you ma!!

even if she footed d bill and made d food I wldnt even Tnk her for d food. rather I wld say "this is d best hv eaten in along while" and get d Tnk u instead.

on a second taught I feel ur wife wanted u to hv acknowledged her cooking skills in presence of her mother... A little "honey, swthrt,darling,bla bla bla. ur food was delicious, and to d "mother I'm glad u gracing us with ur presence" wld hv made u BOSS
Throw dem d bone Mehn!!!!!!!

lytech1:
Thanks ma...
For what?


Was the food prepared by her?

Was she the one who foot the bill of the meal?


Ayamu not understanding..

Oga please be mindful of what u post here. Courtesy demands that from him to her no matter who footed the bill. Please if u never had a proper home training, keep you ignorance to yourself.

alfredo4u:
House, just needed candid advise, my mother Inlaw is in my place for omugo/visit.

Just this evening my wife served me my dinner and after finish eating I left the parlour to the bed room, my wife came in and said why didn't I even say thank ma to her mother.

Pls kindly advise becos I nearly took offence about it.

Courtesy demands that you say THANK YOU at least. It doesn't matter if you provided the money. The effort she put in preparing that meal should be appreciated.
I foot the bills in my house but, NEVER leave the table without thanking my wife. Same goes for my mum and anywhere I eat. You will not shrink in size.

Thank you.

ziga:
After reading all the advice given, you will think most Nigerians are the most courteous of people.

They will push you on the street and ask if you no see road.

Everyday the same people go dey curse President wey fit be dem Granpapa.

Hypocrisy.

Infact, it's the same question I'm asking myself, where are all these respectful Nigerians? Definitely not on the road or in public places

@ Op, i believe u may not have known who among them prepared the meal from your write up. Even while eating you should have been able to tell if its your mother in-law that did the cooking. And as such, complimented her for the cooking and also the tasty meal. All these tales wouldn't have been necessary. Next time be more sensitive and act maturely. And moreover, an after meal 'thank you' will not hurt. Peace!

eph123:


Infact, it's the same question I'm asking myself, where are all these respectful Nigerians? Definitely not on the road or in public places

Imagine if a foreigner was reading the posts on this thread. He/she would be "hmmmm nigerians are very respectful people"

every day another rubbish...

how can my mother inlaw come to your house,you give your wife money to prepare meal,she was not the one who cooked nor served you,you are not in their house,its your house,after eating you dropped your plates and your wife say why did you not say thank you...

my question is what is the thank you for

1?eating in her presense??
2?helping in preparing the meal?
3?Was visiting and ate in her place?
4?contributed for the meal?
5?Thanks for coming to our house
6?Thanks for allowing me to eat in my house?
7?Thanks for giving birth to the daughter who prepared the meal?(abi na loan b bride price?)
8?Thanks for allowing me eat in piece and not in pieces...

We Nigerians just reason like goats...

There is nothing to say thank you for...

she practically did nothing that warrants any thank you...NOTHING.

Thats the mother inlaw...if your wife had said honey no thank you then that one is ok...baby thanks for the meal...it nor concern mother in law at all...

LesbianBoy:


Imagine if a foreigner was reading the posts on this thread. He/she would be "hmmmm nigerians are very respectful people"

Haha! Not knowing how very far away from the truth that is

Children of nowadays eroding our cultural values and turn around asking foolish questions. For the records it's not a must but courtesy demands it. Its the right thing to do. Think it the other way round let's see how u will feel if same is done to you.