Hello everybody,

I Just need your advice on this matter bothering heart for so long,I Just want to be brief, since is a long story. I am a married man with 3 children and i base in paris -france, Last year june, i met this beautiful nigerian girl in the club, and she was invited by one of my Guy girlfriend, who came with us to the Club, so both of us introduce ourselves to each other, and we just keep it cool on the club and we exchange telephone numbers, i never toasted her, i just told her that i would like us to become friend, that i am married and she said that not a problem, as she will be glad to be my friend.

ever since we have been in contact constantly, almost everyday, and she lives close to my area in paris, and we where going so well as friends, as a dancer i always invite her to come with me to the club everyweek, to watch me do the lattest dance moves and she is always present with me in the club, after some months, she had a little problem and she told me her problem,and i thank God i was in the power to help her out, which i did and she was happy and move on.

so one day, as we where driving to the club, she ask me what have i done to her? if i used voodoo on her? i shouted God forbid what is voodoo, then i ask her what she meant by that, she says she is always thinking and dreaming about me, and ask me to forget it that she was joking,so because i was late to DA club i never even bother her to explain what  she mean by the word voodoos, so as a guy i understand very well what she mean

The truth is that i love this girl, inside of me and i never even say it, to her  because i wanted to keep to my promise as her friend, and each time we look at each other we always struck a big smile, i know from my heart that i love this girl and my heart beats for her and i dont know what to do, and it get worse each time i am with her, and i don't know what to do, because what i feel for her is so strong that i can not explain, and my heart is always on fire, i need help in this forum, on what to do, if i should go for the girl or just keep on silence the way i always do!

Also this beautiful lady is a Single lady, and she need someone to love and she has not find that special kind of person because of the way, the love game is too boring in Europe, guys just take it as a game, so we always see each other everyday, and talk over the phone, sometimes i spend the whole day in her house, just talking about life and more, my heart is always thinking about this girl, that i could not even sleep, sometimes i try to forget about her and get on with my life without her, but she calls and cry on the phone that she is missing me, and so on, this has keep me always with her and i don't know if i should break my silence, pls advice.

1) You have a wife, not to mention kids . . . where are u getting time to club all the time?

And what happened to your wife? you dont love her anymore?

You need to check your marriage, something is void for you to be looking elsewhere for love.


My advise, leave the clubs and focus on your family.

Would you want your wife to be doing this?

U are married for Christ sake! How can u run around wit someone who is not your wife n expect nothing to happen? Of course u are in love wit her wen u spend so much time wit her how won't u fall.

Whateva it is dat u call this tin btw u 2 break it off now! b4 u hurt urself your wife n d girl too.

Men u ought to wiser than this u ought to be making this girl meet other single guys instead u are selfishly keeping her to urself.

Let her go man! n save all concerned a world of hurt!

dude

Why dont you take your wife and kids to those clubbing outings? or is ok for you to continue being a bachelor while she slaves at home?

U re a married man y nt let single ladies be. OR u won marry her? N wat do u go doing in d club every wknd? Ain't u suppose to stay wit ur wife n kids. Better focus before u find ur self in disaster,
A WORD IS ENOUGH FOR DA WISE.

Sometimes I just feel it is when alot of people get married that they fornicate the more.

Poster you have a wife and 3 kids, yet you are being carried away by lust, I would not call it love, WHY?

Because it is very impossible as far as I know that you cannot divorce your wife and marry her.

You are only going to be feeding off your lust sexually, that is very wrong bro.

As I be bad boy reach, even though Gee's falls in love too, I pray never to cheat when am married till death do us part.

Satan dey try sha, him get balls, but baba God pass am. The highest wash-wash a man can not withstand to exempt na woman!! May God help us all.

PS: I fink poster works as dancer or sumtin else in the Club. Read his posts well.

Thank you everybody, I live with my wife at home and with my kids, and i am a dancer and i used to get calls to come and dance in the club, ( i mean black and white club) so from Wednesday's, i am always in the party, doing my thing.

My wife is not a party type, not because she does not want, but because of the stress taking care of children in Europe, she is always tired at the end of the day and can not go out, so i have all the time for myself.

I still love my wife very much and she is a wonderful woman, just that i can not stop thinking about this other girl and we understand each other all the time, and she is always around me during the day, but she know i am married and she said she is OK with that, we have never kissed, have sex, but i think it will happen soon, because she has a strong feelings for me and me for her too.

since every poster today is saying the same thing, that i should concentrate on my family, i am already thinking, and i hope i can by the grace of God, because this girl don eat my bone well well.

Dear Speedman

I wish you well and pray you will put some distance between yourself and your friend, let your feelings cool, weigh in your mind what you stand to lose if you start a relationship with your friend, likewise weigh what you would gain if you left your wife and children. She knows you are married so she must know its not appropriate to be taking up your time like this and should be avoiding temptation, and I don't think it is appropriate for you to worry yourself about her problems so much, its ok to be a friend but you have to draw a line somewhere.

Its very hard raising children, if you can make more time with your wife and get a babysitter, you might remember why you married her. I spent years being exhausted by the effort of getting my children educated and developing them into decent people. I must have made my husband feel neglected as he fell for the affections of a single lady who had time to put on makeup, do her nails, shop for pretty clothes and sweettalk him on the phone while I was so exhausted raising kids. See my thread "Brokenhearted and betrayed by my beloved husband" which I posted yesterday. I gave everything to my family selflessly, but my partner forgot to, forgivness may take forever and I cannot stop the pain in my heart.

speedman:

Thank you everybody, I live with my wife at home and with my kids, and i am a dancer and i used to get calls to come and dance in the club, ( i mean black and white club)  so from Wednesday's, i am always in the party, doing my thing.

My wife is not a party type, not because she does not want, but because of the stress taking care of children in Europe, she is always tired at the end of the day and can not go out, so i have all the time for myself.

I still love my wife very much and she is a wonderful woman, just that i can not stop thinking about this other girl and we understand each other all the time, and she is always around me during the day, but she know i am married and she said she is OK with that, we have never kissed, have sex, but i think it will happen soon, because she has a strong feelings for me and me for her too.

since every poster today is saying the same thing, that i should concentrate on my family, i am already thinking, and i hope i can by the grace of God, because this girl don eat my bone well well.

May your desktop or laptop crash instantly and ur sesnse of internet surfing vanishes off ya head
so that you wnt come here to seek help when you already know what you want to do.
POOF OFF GUY!!!

Thank you Rehana, for your advice i am very greatful, i am sorry about your problem at the Moment, dont worry trust in the lord it is well,

slowman~

ure married

concentrate on your wife

and leave young girls alone 4 yung unmarried guyz like us
aristo~lool

speedman:


I still love my wife very much and she is a wonderful woman, just that i can not stop thinking about this other girl and we understand each other all the time, and she is always around me during the day, but she know i am married and she said she is OK with that, we have never kissed, have sex, but i think it will happen soon, because she has a strong feelings for me and me for her too.

See ur mind. Pls for the sake of ur family if not urself leave this girl alone. Don't give urself an excuse "she don eat my bone" U'll only bring trouble on ur own head.

@Speedman. Well we've got wonderful counsellors on this forum and am sure they have said it all. Your greatest asset in life is your family (wife and kids). Your wife is taking all her time to invest in ur kids and u r so pre-occupied with the other lady that doesn't even care about ur family. What u feel for her is not love but lust. U feel that way because u see her alot, communicate with her alot, infact u give her precious times u shd be spending with ur family. Pls don't destroy the nice family God have given u (remember they are ur asset).
I think u shd try and spend more time with ur family, help out with the chores also, play with ur kids and just cut off from the other lady. I don't think she even deserve ur friendship because I doubt if u people can just be mere fnds with all the emotions involve. Anyway I trust u r a good man and u will heed to the voice of warning. Cheers.

It's obvious this poster is an aloholic, he must have been drinking again when he posted this crap. Will someone wake his drunk @ss up and tell him his wife needs some daipers and baby food for the triplets. Omuti, ashewo.

write in french maybe i can understand

@ poster,
pls quit anything u have with this girl,focus on ur family,stop going to the club.i beg u with Gods name.

Favor4all:

@Speedman. Well we've got wonderful counsellors on this forum and am sure they have said it all. Your greatest asset in life is your family (wife and kids). Your wife is taking all her time to invest in your kids and u r so pre-occupied with the other lady that doesn't even care about your family. What u feel for her is not love but lust. U feel that way because u see her alot, communicate with her alot, infact u give her precious times u shd be spending with your family. Pls don't destroy the nice family God have given u (remember they are your asset).
I think u shd try and spend more time with your family, help out with the chores also, play with your kids and just cut off from the other lady. I don't think she even deserve your friendship because I doubt if u people can just be mere fnds with all the emotions involve. Anyway I trust u r a good man and u will heed to the voice of warning. Cheers.

Thank you my brother for your advice and i am very greatful, and to every one who has contributed to my topic, thank you all for your advice and encouragement, it has really been of help to me and i sure i will do what you all have advice me.

speedman:

Thank you my brother for your advice and i am very greatful, and to every one who has contributed to my topic, thank you all for your advice and encouragement, it has really been of help to me and i sure i will do what you all have advice me.

Story!!

@poster you have taking your share in women world,she has 3 kids for you,but being a dancer will definitely put you up with other ladies,have you considered moving to another job for the sake of the kids and your lovely wife?

. .Go ahead. . .do it. . .take her now. . .you know you want to

sayso:

@poster you have taking your share in women world,she has 3 kids for you,but being a dancer will definitely put you up with other ladies,have you considered moving to another job for the sake of the kids and your lovely wife?

@sayso thank you my brother, i have not even thought about getting another Job, like in France getting a Job is not easy, and i only do what i do best and i am called to do, that is dancing! as a dancer i always come across diffrence type of ladies all the time, and i have done my best to put them off until i came across this nigerian lady, who is just not easy for me, anyway thanks you for ur advice, well done.

@poster,

I quite understand your predicament. But I can assure you that you feel the way you did because of your closeness to the lady. And because the two of you continue to have physical contact and also hang out together. The only way out is for you to stop hanging out wth her and limit your involvement with her to professional activities only. if you need to hangout with her, be sure your wife is around.

Give it a try and you will see that the lust you have fr her will gradually vanish,