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Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum - Romance - Nairaland

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Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by kejismuse: 3:16pm On Apr 21, 2017
So the talk about Serena being 8 weeks pregnant and winning the grand slam at the Australian open in January is what is hot right now. Her pictures are all over the internet and yeah I know, we all know, that the Queen-Serena is great, awesome, fantastic ati bee bee lo…
But what I want to even talk about is her gluteus maximus that’s bigger than Bombay.

Just when I was recovering from the Mercy Johnson pictures she took with Ebube Nwagbo, as in why didn’t Baba Lord give me a big bum naaa.
I wish!!!! He is all knowing oh and knew what he was definitely doing because if I had a big bombay most if not all of the following would happen;

1. I will name myself Asibong- Assy for short. Ha!…let me dissect, Assy(for obvious reasons, I gat a BIG BUM) -Bong (well because I need to lay claim to that region where their names end with -bong). To show I garrit AND can use it. cheesy grin angry

2. All this drummers at Owambe Parties will be on speed dial to follow me to every party while playing the gan-gan version of Reekado Bank’s – Your Problem dey for your back, I’ll drop it low and pick it up slowwww.
grin grin grin
3. I’ll definitely incorporate it at Corporate Affairs Commission. I need it to be able to sue and be sued, haters take note. #bigassdontcurr

4. I’ll become a problem in Danfo/BRT- Because my bum has weight and occupies space, it Matters….gerrit When people are complaining in the bus, I’ll be like “Make una no vex oooh, its not my fault,”, while pointing at my yanch and they’ll be like “Eyah Pele, is too mush”.

5. I’ll be that girl that suggest twerking as a solution for EVERYTHING… Need to raise cash for charity Twerk. Need to improve your grades? Please Twerk. The recession digging too deep in your pockets?? Twerk!!! Its your birthday? I’ll wrap my bum in wrapping paper, tie a pretty bow on it and Twerk,Twerk, Twerk, Twerk. tongue tongue tongue

6. When I’m older, I’ll call myself “Olori Kejimuse Idi-Araba” embarassed embarassed embarassed

Let me calm down here mehn. My imagination is making me go gaga. Till that miracle happens I will be hating and doubting the authenticity of big bums in circulation, as I lay down to convince the Lord that I will still maintain my plots of land in heaven if he just turns my figure 9 body to an 8.

Am I alone in this smiley

(C)KEJISMUSE!

3 Likes

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by LethargiQue: 3:23pm On Apr 21, 2017



What is this one yammering about?

3 Likes

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Oluwasaeon(m): 3:27pm On Apr 21, 2017
Nawa o
This Nairaland needs a reform
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Justeenaleo(f): 3:27pm On Apr 21, 2017
lmao that's the reason you don't have.
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by PettySniper: 3:28pm On Apr 21, 2017
cheesy na wah oh.... love yourself joo.. variety is the spice of life wink

1 Like

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by kejismuse: 4:36pm On Apr 21, 2017
Yeah I do, just playing around. wink
PettySniper:
cheesy na wah oh.... love yourself joo.. variety is the spice of life wink

2 Likes

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by serenegroup(m): 4:54pm On Apr 21, 2017
interesting
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Safiaa(f): 4:56pm On Apr 21, 2017
Im mad confused
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by megareal: 4:57pm On Apr 21, 2017
grin grin grin

You madt wella.

All the above points na reason why the Almighty no gree give you. cheesy
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Fernandowski(m): 5:38pm On Apr 21, 2017
If your ass doesn't shake when you brushing you teeth, your ass ain't shiiiittttttt!!! I

2 Likes

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by YeebosAreFools(m): 5:42pm On Apr 21, 2017
You are a useless fool with a miserable life!
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 5:51pm On Apr 21, 2017
..weed at work
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 6:09pm On Apr 21, 2017
That no2 is sooo me cheesy grin grin, tongue
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by PettySniper: 6:25pm On Apr 21, 2017
kejismuse:
Yeah I do, just playing around. wink
lol you write well...keep at it.
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by NeeKlaus: 6:37pm On Apr 21, 2017
kejismuse:
Yeah I do, just playing around. wink
So as you don't have the big bum now, are we to be held responsible?
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 11:37am On Aug 02, 2017
Kejismuse pls I love you,be mine.

2 Likes

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 1:16pm On Aug 02, 2017
Kejismuse,dump me n take all my stuff after 6 months,I don't mind.Just let me luv u.pls

1 Like

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 4:21pm On Aug 02, 2017
Manage the one you have.

1 Like

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 4:32pm On Aug 02, 2017
......

2 Likes

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 4:34pm On Aug 02, 2017
grin

2 Likes

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 3:25pm On Aug 03, 2017
LMAO

1 Like

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 3:28pm On Aug 03, 2017
Lalas247 u needed cheesy

Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Martin0(m): 4:01pm On Aug 03, 2017
Wow the solution has arrived for you..

Try using sperm a lady told me today it gives or help in the improvement the ''Yansheee''
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by stevecantrell: 5:43pm On Aug 03, 2017
never mind , all is not lost..

(1) (Reply)

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