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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum (1726 Views)
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Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by kejismuse: 3:16pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
So the talk about Serena being 8 weeks pregnant and winning the grand slam at the Australian open in January is what is hot right now. Her pictures are all over the internet and yeah I know, we all know, that the Queen-Serena is great, awesome, fantastic ati bee bee lo… But what I want to even talk about is her gluteus maximus that’s bigger than Bombay. Just when I was recovering from the Mercy Johnson pictures she took with Ebube Nwagbo, as in why didn’t Baba Lord give me a big bum naaa. I wish!!!! He is all knowing oh and knew what he was definitely doing because if I had a big bombay most if not all of the following would happen; 1. I will name myself Asibong- Assy for short. Ha!…let me dissect, Assy(for obvious reasons, I gat a BIG BUM) -Bong (well because I need to lay claim to that region where their names end with -bong). To show I garrit AND can use it. 2. All this drummers at Owambe Parties will be on speed dial to follow me to every party while playing the gan-gan version of Reekado Bank’s – Your Problem dey for your back, I’ll drop it low and pick it up slowwww. 3. I’ll definitely incorporate it at Corporate Affairs Commission. I need it to be able to sue and be sued, haters take note. #bigassdontcurr 4. I’ll become a problem in Danfo/BRT- Because my bum has weight and occupies space, it Matters….gerrit When people are complaining in the bus, I’ll be like “Make una no vex oooh, its not my fault,”, while pointing at my yanch and they’ll be like “Eyah Pele, is too mush”. 5. I’ll be that girl that suggest twerking as a solution for EVERYTHING… Need to raise cash for charity Twerk. Need to improve your grades? Please Twerk. The recession digging too deep in your pockets?? Twerk!!! Its your birthday? I’ll wrap my bum in wrapping paper, tie a pretty bow on it and Twerk,Twerk, Twerk, Twerk. 6. When I’m older, I’ll call myself “Olori Kejimuse Idi-Araba” Let me calm down here mehn. My imagination is making me go gaga. Till that miracle happens I will be hating and doubting the authenticity of big bums in circulation, as I lay down to convince the Lord that I will still maintain my plots of land in heaven if he just turns my figure 9 body to an 8. Am I alone in this (C)KEJISMUSE! 3 Likes |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by LethargiQue: 3:23pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
What is this one yammering about? 3 Likes |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Oluwasaeon(m): 3:27pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
Nawa o This Nairaland needs a reform |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Justeenaleo(f): 3:27pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
lmao
that's the reason you don't have. |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by PettySniper: 3:28pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
na wah oh.... love yourself joo.. variety is the spice of life 1 Like |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by kejismuse: 4:36pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
Yeah I do, just playing around. PettySniper: 2 Likes |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by serenegroup(m): 4:54pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
interesting |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Safiaa(f): 4:56pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
Im mad confused |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by megareal: 4:57pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
You madt wella. All the above points na reason why the Almighty no gree give you. |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Fernandowski(m): 5:38pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
If your ass doesn't shake when you brushing you teeth, your ass ain't shiiiittttttt!!! I 2 Likes |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by YeebosAreFools(m): 5:42pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
You are a useless fool with a miserable life! |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 5:51pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
..weed at work |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 6:09pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
That no2 is sooo me , |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by PettySniper: 6:25pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
kejismuse:lol you write well...keep at it. |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by NeeKlaus: 6:37pm On Apr 21, 2017 |
kejismuse:So as you don't have the big bum now, are we to be held responsible? |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 11:37am On Aug 02, 2017 |
Kejismuse pls I love you,be mine. 2 Likes |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 1:16pm On Aug 02, 2017 |
Kejismuse,dump me n take all my stuff after 6 months,I don't mind.Just let me luv u.pls 1 Like |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 4:21pm On Aug 02, 2017 |
Manage the one you have. 1 Like |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 4:32pm On Aug 02, 2017 |
...... 2 Likes |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 4:34pm On Aug 02, 2017 |
2 Likes |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 3:25pm On Aug 03, 2017 |
LMAO 1 Like |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Nobody: 3:28pm On Aug 03, 2017 |
Lalas247 u needed
|
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by Martin0(m): 4:01pm On Aug 03, 2017 |
Wow the solution has arrived for you.. Try using sperm a lady told me today it gives or help in the improvement the ''Yansheee'' |
Re: Why The Good Lord Didn't Give Me A Big Bum by stevecantrell: 5:43pm On Aug 03, 2017 |
never mind , all is not lost..
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