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Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One - NYSC (1) - Nairaland

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Tall Male Corper & Short Female Corper: "The APC We Have Vs APC We Voted For" / NYSC Accommodation For Lagos Corper 2017 / See How This Lagos Corper Is Rocking His Khaki (1) (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 11:58pm On Apr 24
AwesomeDuru:
Come continue bros.

Good thing Mammy Markets have game stands. Because I can't imagine myself going full 3 weeks without PlayStation embarassed




I love meeting fellow gamers. In camp it costs N100 per game. If you get carried away or are an addicted gamer, you could spend N500-N1000 in a sitting. Picture the cumulative effect over a period of three weeks.
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by AwesomeDuru(m): 5:24am On Apr 25
waywardpikin:


I love meeting fellow gamers. In camp it costs N100 per game. If you get carried away or are an addicted gamer, you could spend N500-N1000 in a sitting. Picture the cumulative effect over a period of three weeks.
Haba N100 too cost na embarassed embarassed
N50 would have still fetched significant profit for them na. Me wey like to spend 3-4 hours untop sitting. E no make sense joor, I go just carry my PlayStation Portable join body, lol.

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Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by Kylekent59: 7:49am On Apr 25
waywardpikin:


Yeah man.. you are very right, friendly soldiers, endless shows, etc. Beht which one is cassava group again bikonu?

Dat soldier man that like woman. We call him cocoyam and cassava grin grin

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Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 8:07am On Apr 25
Kylekent59:


Dat soldier man that like woman. We call him cocoyam and cassava grin grin

You talking about a particular one? Bros na most of them like woman o.. You know that RSM, tall, fair and handsome? That one na woman wrapper to the bone marrow, but also mean.
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 8:10am On Apr 25
AwesomeDuru:
Haba N100 too cost na embarassed embarassed
N50 would have still fetched significant profit for them na. Me wey like to spend 3-4 hours untop sitting. E no make sense joor, I go just carry my PlayStation Portable join body, lol.

Problem solved. Funny thing is you might end up not having time to play it all that much, which is a good thing.
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by Kylekent59: 12:36pm On Apr 25
waywardpikin:


You talking about a particular one? Bros na most of them like woman o.. You know that RSM, tall, fair and handsome? That one na woman wrapper to the bone marrow, but also mean.
That fair one go dey toast onyinye. All of them like woman eeh. Dat fine fair girl for platoon 7
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 7:04pm On Apr 25
Kylekent59:

That fair one go dey toast onyinye. All of them like woman eeh. Dat fine fair girl for platoon 7

That lively female sojo bah? Can't blame him though, she's hawt! cheesy
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by Kylekent59: 7:38pm On Apr 25
waywardpikin:


That lively female sojo bah? Can't blame him though, she's hawt! cheesy
Men that girl is d most beautiful girl I have ever seen oooo.
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by Fairyprincess1(f): 2:23pm On Apr 26
waywardpikin:


Oshey my dear. More to come shortly..
please can you help me?? I want to serve in Lagos

1 Like

Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by Trinaxx(f): 7:16pm On Apr 27
waywardpikin:


That lively female sojo bah? Can't blame him though, she's hawt! cheesy
Oga continue jare. Your story is enjoyable; and you write with stylistic gravitas. Please go on.

1 Like

Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 11:59am On Apr 28
Fairyprincess1:
please can you help me?? I want to serve in Lagos

Have you paid the 3k?
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 12:00pm On Apr 28
Trinaxx:

Oga continue jare. Your story is enjoyable; and you write with stylistic gravitas. Please go on.

Awww thanks a lot sweetie. Needed the push. The next post is dedicated to you.

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Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 12:02pm On Apr 28
Dedicated to Trinaxx, in whom I'm well pleased cheesy



I was having a very wonderful dream when the sound of the bugle broke through my consciousness. It was a grating, annoying sound, and the last thing anyone would want to hear so early in the morning, when sleep is sweetest. I rolled around in bed, refusing to get up, as everyone around me hustled to prepare before we would be chased out of the hostel. The soldiers and Man o' War officials thundered through the hostels like there was a war going on, moving from room to room, shouting at the top of their voices and generally scaring and disconcerting more than a few of us. I was the last person to wake up from his bed, and this was to be my ritual till I left camp - I don't joke with my sleep. I went through the motions with a scowl on my face, ignoring one soldier screaming in my face 'Move it!! Move it!! Move it!!' What nonsense! angry

I got out of the hostel and headed to the parade ground in the midst of other PCMs all dressed up in our white on white. I felt so awkward in the outfit, my shorts were too small and I felt so exposed, my hairy yam legs sticking out and staring at me in the face. It took me a while to get used to the dressing, thankfully the white shirts and shorts I bought were of far better quality and bigger in size. I found my platoon and stood at the back, still confused about what was going on - wey be say na sleep I suppose dey sleep. The time must have been around 4am. We were informed on the dos and don'ts in camp, and told that we were still only just prospective corp members until we have concluded our swearing-in ceremony where they will swear for themselves and not me. They requested for volunteers for the quarter guard; these were the people who would carry the flags and really do the marching during the ceremony. I watched as a few people stepped out excitedly, and I wondered if terrestial forces were after them.

'This early morning na him I wan go dey volunteer to march... I dey craze?'

God! I just have to say at this point that my first week in camp was so horrible, and it really started from this point. My legs were shaking seriously, like I wanted to faint. We just stood there, from 4am till 7:30am listening to them drone on and on, marching, learning the salutes and other things. As it turned out, there would be morning drills everyday (apart from Sunday), as well as afternoon drills that would run well into the evenings. I started to envy those who came to camp with medical reports so that they could be excluded from annoying camp activities such as these. I stared at them longingly as they sat under the canopies with their legs crossed, watching us, while we the maloos, were made to stand for such long stretches. In camp, every 6am the Nigerian flag is raised as the bugle is played, and every 6pm the flag is lowered to the sound of the bugle. You are expected to stand at attention where ever you may be in camp until the flag is lowered and the damned bugle has stopped playing. It's amazing being in the outdoors when it's really dark and witnessing the daybreak as everywhere slowly becomes bright, heralding the arrival of the sun. It was quite an experience for me. One of the camp's objectives is to instill discipline in all corp members - for those wey need am. I was hating it so far.

After the morning assembly was over, our platoon officer asked us to converge so we could discuss some things. As we were converging, I saw this girl with the sweetest ass walk across (some metres ahead of me) to join other members of my platoon. It felt like something straight out of a Bollywood movie (ah never hesperretit); felt like she was walking in slow motion, her hair blowing in the wind. I was taken aback. Who is this being that walks with such poise, such grace, such panache; her ukwu swaying confidently behind her with little or no effort, on such a cold, cold morning? The orubebe in me was threatening to complain but I restrained myself as I walked up quickly to get a better view of her face.

To my surprise... it was none other than the stapler girl! You know, from that registration night at the platoon 7 canopy. The girl with the stapler.

When did this SU have such a big nyansh? She had hardly seemed worth a second look that first night. Or is this what she was hiding beneath that unassuming gown she wore? OSANOBUA! This white on white wey NYSC talk say make we wear go cause many things o... chai! Anyway, it was in that moment that I kinda sorta fell in love with Nifemi. The image of her casually walking across the parade ground towards where the rest of our platoon was is forever seared into my memory. For most guys, there is one defining moment, or imagery, that occurs in which we fall in love or decide that 'This is the woman I want. Or this is the woman I want to go for.' This moment was happening to me right now, and I could feel my heart racing as I walked up to join the rest of my platoon in order to hear what our platoon officer had to say...

Be still, my beating heart!

NP - Bad - Tiwa Savage ft Wizkid

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Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 1:16pm On Apr 30
The platoon officer informed us that there were a lot of activities lined up such as drama, debate, cooking, volleyball competition for ladies, football competition for guys, Mr Macho & Miss NYSC. In the meantime, she urged us to choose a platoon leader who would represent us. A guy stepped forward, nominating himself. Then I saw this really good looking fellow; he was dark, tall, muscular, hunky, with the cutest pink lips I had ever seen. I am definitely not gay, but I had stood there admiring his features. It was the first time I'd ever admired a guy like that. Nna, that is how I opened my mouth to say that "I nominate him," pointing in his direction. We put it to a vote and my nominee won. Needless to say, the ladies were intrigued by him as well. His name was Atela. After discussing, we were to write our names on a piece of paper. I stood strategically behind Nife. She was startled when she turned and saw it was me.

'Hi, you're that girl from the other night right? The one that gave me her stapler?'

'Yes, how are you?'

'I'm fine o... How are you enjoying camp so far?'

'Boring, but then again I've always been a boring person,' she said.

'Are you sure? Cos with all I'm seeing you cannot be a boring person,' I replied, referring to her sweet ass. She laughed and I promised to see her later, even though I wasn't sure when that would be. From there I headed into the hostel to meet my bunkie, Maintenance, who was holding a flask in his hand with his face set like he was going to war.

'Maintenance how far na?'

'I dey o, omo those people bin wan kill us today o,' he said, his slim frame shaking with him as he spoke. The hunger was real.

'No mind them jare. God pass them.'

'Dem go still pursue us outside for the swearing in ceremony o, man gast to chop before person die.'

'You mean we are still going to stand outside for hours under the sun?' I wanted to die.

'See you, you no hear when dem bin talk am?' Maintenance turned to Oyo man, 'Bros you never ready?'

'I dey come I dey find my spoon,' the Oyo man replied as he rummaged through his luggage on the top bunk right next to mine.

'Abeg na wetin dem dey chop today?' I asked. I almost forgot that I was starving.

'Omo na beans and pap o.'

Beans and pap! Who came up with such a deadly combination? God forbid!

'You no dey chop?' Maintenance asked, noticing the look on my face.

'If I chop that kain thing na mess I go use kill all of una for this room I swear.'

I quickly freshened up and headed out to the Mami market to get my khaki that was left with the tailor. I picked it up with disappointment - upon the exorbitant cost the idiot still sowed rubbish. Next I went to eat, and as I was eating, that was how they started blowing the bugle again, indicating that we needed to start getting for the swearing in ceremony. According to them, Ambode himself, Governor of Lagos state, was going to be there.

'Again' A girl eating beside me cried out in protest, echoing my thoughts.

Again Shey these people will not kill us? My legs were still aching from standing for over three hours, I was still unsettled from waking up so early, I felt like I was having an out-of-body experience, I desperately needed to find a bed to sleep in. Just then, the soldiers and Man o War officials started flooding the Mami market like termites amidst shouts of "Move it! Move it! Move it!" Some people stood up and ran, leaving their food behind. But me, Wayward Pikin, I remained there until I finished the food, then went to the shoe maker to pick up my jungle boots which had haphazardly been resized to fit me. Went to the hostel, changed up in my full NYSC uniform, and went outside to join the others.

I felt like an egg being roasted in a frying pan. Nobody told us that this khaki uniform was a great insulator of heat. See sweating abeg! As we stood there rehearsing, learning the steps before the governor and the rest of them arrived, I wondered what the point of this whole NYSC scheme was. I finally understood all those stories I'd read where corpers would be marching then some of them would suddenly faint. Not every one was strong enough to go through these rigorous exercises, much less under the hot sun. A girl in front of me, visibly exhausted, beckoned on a soldier to permit her to go sit under the canopy as her legs were about to give out. He asked for her doctor's report but when she couldn't provide any, he eyed her terribly and said "If you want to die, die", before walking away. Omo na gulag we dey o! Or Guatanamo Bay!

'Prey preyyyyyyyyy.... SHUN!!!' The soldier addressing all of us thundered. Translation: stand at attention. We obeyed the commands as they drilled us on what our responses to each command should be. Suddenly there was a shuffle to my far right as 2 boys carried a girl who had fainted in the direction of the clinic. Members of the Red Cross ran behind them. The soldier looked at them as they ran off, unimpressed.

'Some of you think you are here on holidays. That is false. We are here to drill you and mould you into something of worth. By the time we are through with all of you, your fathers and mothers will not recognize you. Your boyfriends and girlfriends will ask "Who is this?" You can all see that someone just fainted right? You haven't seen anything yet.'

That day, about seven people fainted. Legitimately.

Xoxo,

Wayward Pikin.

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Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 1:18pm On Apr 30
If you are reading this thread please I need you to actively participate. Comment, ask questions, whatever. It helps the writer as well. Thank you.

1 Like

Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by MarshRiley(m): 1:43pm On Apr 30
You're actually a good writer
A very good one.
Lagos was among my choices so this writeup is helpful.
Wait o,so to miss all dos parades I must have a medical certificate?
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 1:53pm On Apr 30
MarshRiley:
You're actually a good writer
A very good one.
Lagos was among my choices so this writeup is helpful.
Wait o,so to miss all dos parades I must have a medical certificate?

It's not a given but it certainly helps. Though there are situations in which they would completely disregard ur doctor's report.

Thanks for the compliment.
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 3:27pm On Apr 30
After the grueling swearing in ceremony, we were now officially Corp Members, no longer PCMs. I went to the hostel exhausted and rested till evening, then went to the shoe maker to pick up my white shoes. There I saw two guys from my room, I tried to greet them but I don't know if they didn't see me or they did and couldn't be bothered to respond. I wasn't really a clique person, and it seemed like quite a number of people had formed alliances and groups that would see them through the next three weeks. I wondered if this was how my life was going to be, but I couldn't force anything, it would have to come natural like minerals. That evening I buzzed a girl from the whatsapp group to come meet me so we could hang out. She obliged and came with two of her friends, and said she hoped I didn't mind. I didn't. Mami was electric as usual, the chairs were out, the speakers were blaring, and people were trooping in.

I didn't really need the girls for anything, just needed companionship. Soon our table was full, the ladies never experretit. Next thing I order chicken and chips for each of us. The lady with me refused my offerings, that it was way too much. But I was in Lagos camp, and you only live once, so I insisted and she agreed. I drank three bottles of Orijin, she drank three bottles of Snapp, her friends drank three bottles of small Stout each. It was a really swell evening and soon they were on their feet dancing, swayed by the music and the alcohol swimming in their systems, not to mention the chicken and chips. Me and the girl I called were engaged in idle conversation when my phone rang - it was Hajia. I looked around me in case maybe she had seen me but I couldn't see her. I hesitated and didn't pick her call. I knew if I invited her to join me she wouldn't, being a Hajia and all. So I was determined to enjoy myself and go see her when I was through. At the back of my mind I wondered where Nife would be at the moment. I had forgotten to collect her number ealier in the day.

Runtown's 'Mad Over You' started playing and the girls went wild, including the one I was talking to. They increased the velocity with which they gyrated while I sat in my chair watching them and feeling like a boss - like a young Hugh Hefner in his very own playboy mansion.

A few tables away, my roommates watched with their jaws touching the floor. A legend had just been born.

*******

NP - Leg Over - Mr Eazi

6 Likes

Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by RoyalSleek(m): 7:06pm On Apr 30
Kudos to you. I'm following with keen attention. Please, don't waste time with updates.

#PCM17A.

1 Like

Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by HashtagMoniker(m): 9:31pm On Apr 30
I have been reading but lemme comment, wehdone sir. It is a beautiful piece u r giving us here and for some of us still in the uni. It helps to set our plan and strategize... wink.
More ink to your pen.

1 Like

Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by youngforever22: 11:09pm On Apr 30
Nice writeup man... Following you very very well

Like how much will be sufficient to take to lagos camp as an average Nigerian... Plus will i be allowed to take my tab in

1 Like

Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by Missmossy(f): 11:33pm On Apr 30
Interesting cheesy keep it coming those soldiers have no chill. They would definitely want to reduce someone to a sack of bones which i don't want.

1 Like

Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by Neyoalao(m): 12:02am On May 01
waywardpikin:


A few tables away, my roommates watched with their jaws touching the floor. A legend had just been born.

*******

NP - Leg Over - Mr Eazi
Thumbs up man. With all these stories I don read for NL na to go save up well for the coming May service oh. How much you feel say go dey okay I flex well. And shey I fit run that your package how much fit finish am... I haven't paid that stupid 3k tho the stress is too much.

2 Likes

Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by annexes: 5:37am On May 01
Neyoalao:

Thumbs up man. With all these stories I don read for NL na to go save up well for the coming May service oh. How much you feel say go dey okay I flex well. And shey I fit run that your package how much fit finish am... I haven't paid that stupid 3k tho the stress is too much.
it depends on the kinda person you're. If you're the type that grooves a lot, just budget 4-5k per day. I'm sure you gon enjoy yourself well with that. Camp can be interesting depending on the people you roll with, look well...

1 Like

Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 11:19am On May 01
RoyalSleek:
Kudos to you. I'm following with keen attention. Please, don't waste time with updates.

#PCM17A.

Welcome on board bro. It's only gonna get better.
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 11:21am On May 01
HashtagMoniker:
I have been reading but lemme comment, wehdone sir. It is a beautiful piece u r giving us here and for some of us still in the uni. It helps to set our plan and strategize... wink.
More ink to your pen.

Oshey, glad I can be of help. Tori still plenty.
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 11:25am On May 01
youngforever22:
Nice writeup man... Following you very very well

Like how much will be sufficient to take to lagos camp as an average Nigerian... Plus will i be allowed to take my tab in

Lol @ very very well... that's the spirit!

As an average Nigerian, 30k will be very sufficient. You will get your first allowee while in camp too, #19,800. Most people blow it all in camp, some on the very day they receive the cash. I hope u wee not follow dem and join bahd gang. cheesy cheesy

Of course you can take your tab in, even your laptop, your car, etc. But of course, at owner's risk. You may not even have time for your tab. A small android phone that performs almost all the functions may be better.
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 11:27am On May 01
Missmossy:
Interesting cheesy keep it coming those soldiers have no chill. They would definitely want to reduce someone to a sack of bones which i don't want.

You have no idea babe. Just be mentally prepared for whatever. It's hard in the beginning but we all adjusted to the system eventually.
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 11:32am On May 01
Neyoalao:

Thumbs up man. With all these stories I don read for NL na to go save up well for the coming May service oh. How much you feel say go dey okay I flex well. And shey I fit run that your package how much fit finish am... I haven't paid that stupid 3k tho the stress is too much.

I think you can manage all your needs and still flex if you're prudent with money on a budget of 30k. For me, I think I spent between 50-70k in camp which may or may not be much if you think about it. Minus my allowee which I also blew.

I am really sensitive to issues concerning money especially on a forum like nairaland, but I'll put this out there for anyone who really needs the info. I paid 60k. 100% guaranteed.
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 11:35am On May 01
annexes:
it depends on the kinda person you're. If you're the type that grooves a lot, just budget 4-5k per day. I'm sure you gon enjoy yourself well with that. Camp can be interesting depending on the people you roll with, look well...

Lol @ 4-5k per day. Some days I made sure I spent less than 1k, other days I spent as high as 5k on a whim, so you're not far from the truth. Still, I don't believe you need loads of cash to have fun. I would have had fun either way.

Where did you serve?
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by Trinaxx(f): 1:46pm On May 01
waywardpikin:


I think you can manage all your needs and still flex if you're prudent with money on a budget of 30k. For me, I think I spent between 50-70k in camp which may or may not be much if you think about it. Minus my allowee which I also blew.

I am really sensitive to issues concerning money especially on a forum like nairaland, but I'll put this out there for anyone who really needs the info. I paid 60k. 100% guaranteed.
Osheyy baddest! 50-70k in less than three weeks? Well i'm a 2017 Batch A PCM o, wouldn't mind if you sow into my ministry smiley
Re: Nysc Chronicles Of A Wayward Lagos Corper - The Search For The One by waywardpikin(m): 9:53pm On May 01
Trinaxx:

Osheyy baddest! 50-70k in less than three weeks? Well i'm a 2017 Batch A PCM o, wouldn't mind if you sow into my ministry smiley

lol

Don't worry love, I'm sure you'll be able to find someone willing to die on top your matter in camp. cheesy

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