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6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children - Family (3) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children (28538 Views)

Different Types Of Nigerian Mothers (MEME COLLECTION) / The Girl Child And Sex! Mistakes African Mothers Make By Ayeni Faith Damilola / The Girl Child And Sex! Mistakes African Mothers Make. (2) (3) (4)

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Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by bishopdave(m): 8:09am On May 16, 2017
mikool007:
You can't escape that slap even if d vistiors spend one year with you dat slap will be in ur account balance grin
Lol you made my day.....Your account balance of slap is still intact... no service charge remove
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Wishaky(f): 8:13am On May 16, 2017
Waoooo, its remind me of ma loving mother of blessed memory, she departed 2yrs ago nd can't just stop missing her on a daily basis.

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Nobody: 8:16am On May 16, 2017
pressplay411:
Caning while sleeping is the worst rude awakening. Only 9ja mothers are specialists in this dept

My mum didn't even do this. my mum never canned me.

It was my dad who did this to me. angry
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by dangotesmummy: 8:17am On May 16, 2017
pressplay411:
Caning while sleeping is the worst rude awakening. Only 9ja mothers are specialists in this dept
but it's not healthy at least to the mental health.

It can cause schock and some other traumatic experiences that cab affect the child's mental growth and self esteem

1 Like

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by queenitee(f): 8:17am On May 16, 2017
AustineCJ:
1.I didn't kill my own mother so you will not kill me.
2.If I hear wii from you,you go hear whyn.
3.Why won't I drink water n drop cup in peace 4u.
4.All those your friends how many of them have visited you in these house??my friend go inside.
5.Mum am hungry,Smiles come and eat me.
6.Mum I need money,come and sell me foolish boy your mates de work already.
7.Wake late in the morning she will remind you there's no food for a lazy man.
8The worst na when you write n fail jamb my brothers n sisters your case is different, she will torment you every morning with your jamb score.
God bless you, esp the no. 4 it's so true. Mummy I'm going to visit a friend.
Mum: that your friend, how many days has she come to visit you. Hun? Answer me. Before I open my eyes, you have gone back inside the house. See her, ole. She knows nothing else but to play. That's where waywardness starts from.

But all the same I love her.
Or when you are on vacation or the school is on strike and you refused to go home. Mehn, just don't pick her call when she calls, if not, the things she would say, you will wonder if it's not kuku good to start being wayward. To her, you are still in school because you are wayward and when you eventually get home, you are in for preaching. Bible verse upon Bible verse .

I love her so much tho

9 Likes

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by dangotesmummy: 8:18am On May 16, 2017
grin
AyamConfidence:
When you think you have grown up and you say "mummy leave me alone joor, can somebody not have peace again?"

Your mum:
grin
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by queenitee(f): 8:19am On May 16, 2017
lonelydora:
One thing I love my mother is they she wasn't using food denial as a form of punishment, no matter the offence committed
Mine too, she never deny me food but when she cook and you complain about the food that you don't like it, that's your cross. She won't cajole you to eat

1 Like

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by dangotesmummy: 8:22am On May 16, 2017
grin grin

This is so my mom. grin

I have mastered her tricks.if she says yamilowo I usually be like miolowo.you know I just finished buying xyz grin
SealTeam6:
*Modified*
I came home during a break from my NYSC one day...my mum wanted to buy card to subscribe, but she could not get card her Etisalat card in the neighborhood cos it was sunday. So I volunteered to use my Skye bank for her upon the agreement that she will give me the cash. After I had helped her recharge 1000 naira Etisalat... She came back 2 minutes later that I should help her recharge another 1k that she need to call somebody making 2k that she will return to me in cash that evening...foolish me I agreed !
O boy...later that evening I asked her for my money, na so she started the story of my life right from when she give birth to me to when she sent me to Unilorin. Mehn, I just give up.
E pain me gan...but I learnt my lesson : NEVER EVER BORROW YOUR MUM MONEY THAT YOU CANNOT FORGET.

Shout out to all single mum out there...my mum with just her miserable civil servant salary single handedly train the 3 of us up to University. And even collected all her life savings to send our biggest bro Abroad to complete his professional course. God pls...let this woman be my mother again in the next life and the next and the next. kiss
but if I usually give her the money I know I can comot face from
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by lonelydora: 8:25am On May 16, 2017
queenitee:

Mine too, she never deny me food but when she coins and you complain about the food that you don't like it, that's your cross. She won't cajole you to eat

Exactly
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by daintyprincess(f): 8:34am On May 16, 2017
RillJ:
All the food you have been eating in this house nko? U think I stole them?

the clothes, you are putting on nko?
you think they just appeared in your wardrobe?

2 Likes

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by ioreth69(f): 8:35am On May 16, 2017
AyamConfidence:
When your mum borrows that money you have been saving to buy gameboy with and when you ask her she says "all the food you have been eating in this house, how much have you paid?"
grin grin
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by AyamConfidence(m): 8:40am On May 16, 2017
quote author=dangotesmummy post=56564316] grin grin[/quote] iya dangote ekaro ma cheesy
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by kuuljay(m): 8:49am On May 16, 2017
Histrings08:
Lol... I thank God for my mother, she never did any of dis.. She only start preaching nd praying or sometimes report me to my big Brothers..
mumu!!! Your big brothers took the brunt,just ask them and they will tell you how lucky you are

2 Likes

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Nobody: 8:50am On May 16, 2017
Naija mums don't do that, the op must be frm Zimbabwe angry

Naija mums never starve their children, no matter what sad

90%+ would agree with me on this angry
lonelydora:
One thing I love my mother is they she wasn't using food denial as a form of punishment, no matter the offence committed

3 Likes

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by MARYchiells(f): 8:50am On May 16, 2017
OrestesDante:
borrow money they will never return.





Quite on the point. Whenever you ask for your money she will ask you to calculate how much food you've been eating since you were born. I trust granny with money then, she will hide it inside an old book and put it where even you cannot find.
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Histrings08(m): 8:52am On May 16, 2017
Guy, I no be mumu o.. Maka why now
kuuljay:
mumu!!! Your big brothers took the brunt,just ask them and they will tell you how lucky you are
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by kuuljay(m): 8:55am On May 16, 2017
Histrings08:
Guy, I no be mumu o.. Maka why now
grin grin grin nor vex
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Nnwannsukka(m): 8:56am On May 16, 2017
dangotesmummy:
but it's not healthy at least to the mental health.

It can cause schock and some other traumatic experiences that cab affect the child's mental growth and self esteem
What is this one saying.
Traumatic expression ko, Mental illness ni
My mama go flog poverty away from ur LinageLin :Dage grin

2 Likes

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by kuuljay(m): 9:00am On May 16, 2017
ajepako:
Chai.... Mama Titi own Na omorogun ( turn garri spoon)

Offend my mom and you go chop omorogun or slippers for back..

And she no dey miss....

Kudos to mama Titi of life....
grin grin grin grin
bross there is one slap my mum mastered,it lands at the centre of the back,...my guy you go open mouth to cry but no audio ,only whistle

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by fpeter(f): 9:01am On May 16, 2017
AustineCJ:
1.I didn't kill my own mother so you will not kill me.
2.If I hear wii from you,you go hear whyn.
3.Why won't I drink water n drop cup in peace 4u.
4.All those your friends how many of them have visited you in these house??my friend go inside.
5.Mum am hungry,Smiles come and eat me.
6.Mum I need money,come and sell me foolish boy your mates de work already.
7.Wake late in the morning she will remind you there's no food for a lazy man.
8The worst na when you write n fail jamb my brothers n sisters your case is different, she will torment you every morning with your jamb score.

I can relate...No.4 and 8, God help you after failing she comes home early to catch you playing or watching vcd.
that No.4, she would never allow my friends visit me. It was a crime to even have friends back then.

1 Like

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by menwongo(m): 9:07am On May 16, 2017
xwin:
Ghanian Spotted!
Lolz. Na Indomie generation lad
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Nobody: 9:13am On May 16, 2017
Tiny23:
I can't remember experiencing any of these from my mum.
how will u experience it... You that they gave birth to.. oct 7 2001..
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Shollarh(m): 9:19am On May 16, 2017
Hehehe

Mama Sola where are you o!!!
grin grin
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by delishpot: 9:21am On May 16, 2017
lanre316:
What of mothers shouting and calling you from very far away in the house only to come and change TV station using a remote control sitting right in front of her. Mothers. Gotta love them.

Because they don't know how to use it na grin grin or they are too lazy to scroll through the channels

1 Like

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Nobody: 9:25am On May 16, 2017
ajepako:
Chai.... Mama Titi own Na omorogun ( turn garri spoon)

Offend my mom and you go chop omorogun or slippers for back..

And she no dey miss....

Kudos to mama Titi of life....
grin grin grin grin
ajepako... I sight u... Ur own is always unique... Always catching fun with u.
Mine is when talking to my mum, she would say na ur fada u dey talk to, no be me.. Lolz.. God bless u mum.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by ajepako(f): 9:30am On May 16, 2017
kuuljay:
bross there is one slap my mum mastered,it lands at the centre of the back,...my guy you go open mouth to cry but no audio ,only whistle

Whistle eh.... My mama get name for it sef..

She go tell you, l go nack you this omorogun and you go whistle like agonyin people...

Till date l still wonder how Agonyin people in Togo dey whistle..

God bless our mothers... grin grin grin grin

2 Likes

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Nobody: 9:38am On May 16, 2017
Not all borrow money without paying
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by babadem2much(m): 9:49am On May 16, 2017
My mum na case ahswear...
At my age working i visited home, i know my mum cooked my deli as i told her in 5 hours time i will be home.... So i reached parked my car bring out all i bought for her and my younger one from the booth, when i entered i said chai mum i de hungry like i go die!

She looked at me and smile she said me no de use gas o na firewood and kerosene stove oya na you been de cook for this house before you get work, me i no born woman pikin so alele peel yam and start. I said haba! Mama i know say food de but why na she say e de untop my head come carry am now...


Later she went inside and call come carry your food jare abi i don turn ya wife??

I laughed and said if to say my food no de i for pack everything wey i buy come give you..
She say you no fit as firewood still plenty for this compound.

Mama you de best

3 Likes

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Gabriella24: 9:52am On May 16, 2017
My mama own no be to beat oh, she will just wake you right at that moment when the sleep is 'sweeting' you, point to the door and tell you 'go and stool down there' just go jeje.
Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by Hopefulman: 9:57am On May 16, 2017
At 18 thinking I was all grown then, there's was this particular girl who was older than me but sneaks into my house when both of my parents have left for work, but my mom's job wasn't far from the house, so there was this amebo woman at my street then who was giving her every vital information whenever this girl sneaks into the compound to collect the D.


So this particular day I ran out of luck and the next thing I heard the main gate swung open only to peep from the window and saw it was my mom, I quickly took her into my room and hid her in the wardrobe, for my mind we were both safe, highest maale go just pick something discharge cos I have pulled this stunt once before, pikin wey wan bad.


Only to open the door for my mom and I was surprised as she got in she didn't even look at my face or answered my greeting, she just begin do Ultimate Search like say she dey find one missing treasure, from room to room, kitchen, toilet, my body begin hot by force, heart begin beat fast, cold begin catch me cos I know say e don red for me


Like play like joke, she got to my room, I just sat in the seating room sweating, at first I was hearing little noise of "mommy please" before it started becoming clearer, maale don drag this babe from wardrobe where I hide am dey drill her with slap reach my side, as she dragged her to where I was she was like "Tochi what is this, this is the study you are suppose to be studying abi?" , omo my own drilling started





But I thank God Sha, she didn't let my dad know till date, the drilling for bad, cos James Bond dey learn work where em dey.



I am 30 now, that young lad has come of age and I remember her visiting and the discuss came up, come and see laugh na


I love you mommy, you are the best

5 Likes

Re: 6 Hilarious Ways Nigerian Mothers Make Conversation With Children by timmydahpeace(f): 10:08am On May 16, 2017
Tiny23:
I can't remember experiencing any of these from my mum.
then i can say you don't have a good mum...or maybe she's not a nigerian

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