Why is the bride and groom required to read different vows in some churches. While the man is required to say "love, with my worldly possession", the bride is asked to say "obey, forsaking all others".

Shouldn't it be same vows no matter where you're getting married?

going by biblical writing, woman is told to submit to the man while the man is told to love the man. in other words, woman is told to obey/sibmit while man is expected to love. when they are making the vows, they are expected to be serious about it and not just mouth mere words, but with the ills that has befallen our families and marriages, we tend to wonder if we actually vow truthfully or if we actually listen to what we say and do them.

The idea of submission is one I find very laughable.

Seun:

The idea of submission is one I find very laughable.

laughable huh? why is that so? because you think the women cannot heed that advice especially in this age or time or perhaps because the men tend to use that as meaning suppression. pls, do tell, why do you find the idea of submission laughable

If you say man love, woman obey; how come men scream wolf when their wives don't love them?

How come nobody ever talk about honour. The Bible did ask men to honour their wives. The last time I checked my dico honour meant "higher kind of respect". Submission, reverence, respect etc is mutual.

I still think vows should be the same; what is good for the goose is good for the gander.

About being serious with the vows; maybe it should be said from the heart instead of read from a book or may be as some people suggested have horns and axes or better still lace it with blessings and curses in Deuteronomy then both parties will know its no joke.

A woman can only be submissive, if there is love from the man

Seun:

The idea of submission is one I find very laughable.

submission doesnt mean crawling on your hands and knees like some guys interprete.

For better for worse ----------------- Some churches


For better in the future ----------------- Some churches

these days its for better for good. corny as hell! 

Ha its better oh cos no one is praying for worse.LOL

whether you pray and fast, you are promised temptations which God has already given you power to overcome so why change the vows?

Those churches in my view are encouraging men to only try to give women material things and expect her to lick their asses and not poke her nose into his affair taking what ever he does as her lot.The man will say dont i give you what you want as the priest said?why the hell are you questioning my authority you should respect me

hannydarl:

Those churches in my view are encouraging men to only try to give women material things and expect her to lick their asses and not poke her nose into his affair taking what ever he does as her lot.The man will say don't i give you what you want as the priest said?why the hell are you questioning my authority you should respect me

hmm! reminds me of the debate most people have with the bride price paid in eastern part of Nigeria. some claim it gives the man the right to do anything to the female since he already "bought her" per se, and of course a wide group of people disagree with that

spoilt:

whether you pray and fast, you are promised temptations which God has already given you power to overcome so why change the vows?

LOL.Who made d vows?

9ja4eva, is don't a joke or some churches actually type out "for better in future"?

Yes, who made the vows and who is expected to keep the vows?

9ja4eva, is that a joke or some churches actually type out "for better in future"?

Yes, who made the vows and who is expected to keep the vows?

Are you guys serious?

Am serious


@Nite Angel


Its nt a joke some churches do it.The Vows were made by humans right.

well ur vows matter alot cos ur life is as a result of d things u said or didnt say.so saying 4 better,4 worse then u shud xpect suntim worse ur way cos u asked 4 it.suntim better is u agree to stand against sivkness,poverty,disease,lack or want in d name of Jesus.its according to God's word.

I'm sure those who came up with for better for worse had their genuine reason but with all these complexities isn't it better for the couple to say a vow that comes from their hearts maybe then you'll actually hear some men saying "as long as you obey me there won't be trouble" and some women saying "as long as you keep it in your pants, I'll love you forever."

What ya think

ewo.U wan use laf kill me.It cant get there though.

Nite Angel:

I'm sure those who came up with for better for worse had their genuine reason but with all these complexities isn't it better for the couple to say a vow that comes from their hearts maybe then you'll actually hear some men saying "as long as you obey me there won't be trouble" and some women saying "as long as you keep it in your pants, I'll love you forever."

What ya think

Nite angel you are funny, but that might work though

I dont think so.Only if a new religion springs up maybe.

Really it's all about being sincere, who keeps the vows anyway? For richer, you stay, for poorer you quit.

A man pursuing green card once asked his bother to attend his wedding on his behalf and of course read the vows in his place and sign for him while he ensured he phoned all day to register his loyalty. Years down the line he looks the woman in the face to say I signed no contract with you. I don't know but the loop holes in our laws is the only thing that allowed for a stand-in at a contract signing of that magnitude. Men grumble about women not adopting their names but women actually sign their maiden names not the Mrs name on the contract, they use their maiden name signature. So the contract is with the Miss but you live it out with the Mrs.

Try writng your own vows on this thread, let's see what you come up with,

lmao

Hmm makes sense

Nite Angel:

I'm sure those who came up with for better for worse had their genuine reason but with all these complexities isn't it better for the couple to say a vow that comes from their hearts maybe then you'll actually hear some men saying "as long as you obey me there won't be trouble" and some women saying "as long as you keep it in your pants, I'll love you forever."

What ya think

I actually support your point.  I've attended weddings where the couple wrote their own vows and some of it did not even include words like 'for better for worse I think marriage vows should come from the heart and not mere words of mouth which is not honored. Vows are meant to be sacred, if you love your man/woman, it will not cross your mind to break your vows but eh, how many love each other?

Debbieolat,
Great now let's start with you. If you were to write your own vow what would it be?

Whydid you pick on me mate? Anyway, I'll give it a try as I'm getting closer to my day. If you get me.

Olaniyi, I am honoured and privilege to have come to know you
Loving you is the greatest gift of lifetime
Loving you is the joy and treasure of my heart
Loving you is my dream come true
Thank for opening your heart to me
I've dreamt of this day
And I'm so proud and lucky to all you
The love of my life
Thanks for being you
And for being mine
I take you as my brother and a part of me
To cherish, honour and give you my heart
For ever till Jesus comes
With the help of God,
I will love you till the end.


All right now, I'll leave it at this for now. Let's hear from y'all

lmao

Debbieolat, thanks. I hope Olaniyi will have something great to write as well.

9ja4eva,
Why the laughter? This is serious business and straight from the heart.

If I were to write my own and not have a mortal do so for me it will be simple; something like -

Grow old with me
Let's learn the junk
And enjoy the joy of love
Daily

if you consider this dry, simply provide yours and wait for a better version.

Kai y nt pass it into law.Its so funny a vow

Yours please,