creepsyme:
Ooh so simple my darling, just create ur own world and make it happen for u with so much happiness, show urself so much love
, make d best hairstyle, eat well, dress well, wen he is at home look sexy not for him but for urself and do ur tin, make phone calls with friends especially wen he is around and laugh ur loudest laugh, shift all ur love to ur child and make it very obvious. if u continue to be depressed he will continue to oppress u. Tnk me later.

Macgreat:


Jealousy has no link to love, people made it seem it is but it isn't.

Any level of jealousy is dangerous

Lovelywings:
OP this is Nairaland. The commenters here will blame you for the maltreatment simply because you are a woman. See how several people are insinuating that you trapped him with pregnancy That's what the (mostly men) do here. In their world view, men are naturally rational and sensible. Women are the opposite.

If you want real advice go elsewhere. Go to Bellanaija where the women are. All you will get here is abuse.

Caprigal:

Honestly, I was just reading and shaking my head. This site has many immature and sexist males its appalling. No one is even showing sympathy for the woman, they are all apportioning blame and asking her to solve the problems her husband caused.
If the tables were turned this thread will be 20 pages long with men insulting the wife for flirting outside and ignoring her husband at home.

favouredAda:
Gud pm nairalanders.

I'm a young lady in my early 30, married for 2years+ now... my issue is that my husband doesn't gist with me but when he is with other ladies, he can laugh & gist for Africa. He has never taken me out after our marriage. in short I look like a tenant in his house. if we are going out he will tell me to be in front while he will b far behind. if I complain, he will say I'm nagging.

I was sick last week, he just came dropped #10k for me to go see our doctor, he didn't even ask if I can go by myself BT same incident happened to his younger bro wife yesterday, with just a phone call, he went to the hospital & stood by d bro. over night ( sumtin he didn't even do wen I gave birth to our baby) I have been thinking he will change BT this days own his really worst, calling some girls in my streets "my love" why he shout my 1st name no matter where he is.

Pls advise me cos I am beginning to dislike him

Hector09:
Maybe its a forced marriage

Daboomb:


Some times, l feel like slapping th eheck out of some of our young men of today!
Among their list of "wife material" is that she must be working in a coirporate environment...when they themselves dont even have a job!

Foolish Gigolo, l call them.
Why wont their wife turn them to "collect-wrapper-hold-for-me"?

Everything is so upside down nowadays, it is so annoying.

Memories12411:
My sister you are welcome to "Men's World". The heart of men is desperately wicked. If you are not doing anything to generate income for the family is a great problem for you because anything about you irritates him. Check your financial life very well.
Secondly, it could be you have turned yourself to a different person after giving birth to your child. Check your looks.
Last but not the least. Check your relationship with your in-laws. They could be instigating your husband.
In conclusion, I encourage you to pray without ceasing.
Wonderful Post, Thanks for sharing this beautiful tips.
Have a Great Day.
http://www.teubeu.com

MhizzAJ:
Marriage is really interesting
Here to read comments and learn as well

alexialin:
Peeps blaming the op, do not understand what she's going through.
The mistake she made was letting his behavior slide while they were dating, maybe he is wealthy.

I know such kind of men. They are in the range of upwardly mobile young successful guys, who feels the world is under their feet. And any woman they date or marry is rubbish.
I Met a guy like the op's husband, while we went out on our first date. Immediately I notice his behavior, I sat him down and asked what's the problem? This is our first date and u are behaving so arrogantly? He looked at me and said I talk too much and women are meant to be quiet. I was like really? I talk too much. Then he looked away. I smiled at myself, I shook my head. I said seriously? He didn't answer o. Then I walked away.
That was the end, the relationship was dead on arrival. I won't allow any man treat me like I don't exist. To hell with what u have. He's still jumping in and out of relationship till date. So full of himself. Fucvk you! Fucvk your money! And fucvk whatever u think its scratching your brain.


Op, it's a pity u are married to. Such a jerk. Na to manage am remain. Or file for divorce if u can no longer bear his attitude.
The choice is yours.

lexy2014:
yeah u right.
Marriage is really interesting and much of it is about tolerance. what baffles me is y some folks seek counsel on nairaland 4 their marital issues when majority of people on nairaland are d most intolerant set of humans i have ever come across

GraGra247:
All the things you listed points to one thing and one thing mainly:

Your husband has developed chronic dislike for you.

Finding out the cause is now left for you.

Topestbilly:


Since we don't have his part of the story, I will advise you to be honest to yourself because it's going to do you a big favour.

*Check yourself if you've done something wrong that led to all this maltreatment

*Check if there are some particular doing of yours that irritates him.

*if you find any of the above, sit him down, beg him, tell him u wil make amends but if you truly check yourself and your hands are clean. Remember your life and happiness are your priorities.

May God help you.

buddie:
And you think or feel this number of men can all be wrong abi?

She had better wake up and start finding better means of improving her marriage before more damage is done instead.

favouredAda:
Gud pm nairalanders.

I'm a young lady in my early 30, married for 2years+ now... my issue is that my husband doesn't gist with me but when he is with other ladies, he can laugh & gist for Africa. He has never taken me out after our marriage. in short I look like a tenant in his house. if we are going out he will tell me to be in front while he will b far behind. if I complain, he will say I'm nagging.

I was sick last week, he just came dropped #10k for me to go see our doctor, he didn't even ask if I can go by myself BT same incident happened to his younger bro wife yesterday, with just a phone call, he went to the hospital & stood by d bro. over night ( sumtin he didn't even do wen I gave birth to our baby) I have been thinking he will change BT this days own his really worst, calling some girls in my streets "my love" why he shout my 1st name no matter where he is.

Pls advise me cos I am beginning to dislike him

BadLuckonmyGame:
how did u know d bolded... Have u heard from d man... U must be a bad judge... Please if u have children or u plan to have don't judge like that in ur home... U must hear from both parties before u judge... Remember who first judge matter, no dey ever do wrong... Op did not even say from d first year of marriage if d husband showed her love and care and how it started going down.. nothing... Just my husband don't show me love n care... Then u conclude d man is evil? Ask d op questions, u need more info to be able to draw a reasonable conclusion since u don't have d husband here to tell his part of the story...hence those plenty questions directed at d op... Unfortunately she has failed to answer any of the questions... That alone is a signal that d op is hiding alot of info

adaxxy:
One fact is that the illiterate ibo guys treats their wives like second class citizens or especially if you are not their from their tribe ..
You're finished

InvertedHammer:


It seems that you married late.

May be the potency of what you used to nail him for marriage has dwindled.

Perhaps, it is time to pay baba another visit.

Topestbilly:


Since we don't have his part of the story, I will advise you to be honest to yourself because it's going to do you a big favour.

*Check yourself if you've done something wrong that led to all this maltreatment

*Check if there are some particular doing of yours that irritates him.

*if you find any of the above, sit him down, beg him, tell him u wil make amends but if you truly check yourself and your hands are clean. Remember your life and happiness are your priorities.

May God help you.

Jman06:
The truth remains that more yoruba men than Igbo men treat their wives like TRASH, and this is regardless of whether they are literate or illiterate.

Newboss:
So the Bible told you that you can manipulate a person through prayer?

Wow! That's actually called fraud! I hope someone uses jazz on you and get you to wire all the money in your account to him!

MrBrownJay1:


FIXED

by the way, do you really think that contributing financially and helping that demon would change anything?! this man has absolutely NO LOVE for this woman, and dont even want to be seen by her side... a smart person would ask what is going on, and thus divorce the demon who treats her like common garbage. end of misery.

alexialin:
Peeps blaming the op, do not understand what she's going through.
The mistake she made was letting his behavior slide while they were dating, maybe he is wealthy.

I know such kind of men. They are in the range of upwardly mobile young successful guys, who feels the world is under their feet. And any woman they date or marry is rubbish.
I Met a guy like the op's husband, while we went out on our first date. Immediately I notice his behavior, I sat him down and asked what's the problem? This is our first date and u are behaving so arrogantly? He looked at me and said I talk too much and women are meant to be quiet. I was like really? I talk too much. Then he looked away. I smiled at myself, I shook my head. I said seriously? He didn't answer o. Then I walked away.
That was the end, the relationship was dead on arrival. I won't allow any man treat me like I don't exist. To hell with what u have. He's still jumping in and out of relationship till date. So full of himself. Fucvk you! Fucvk your money! And fucvk whatever u think its scratching your brain.


Op, it's a pity u are married to. Such a jerk. Na to manage am remain. Or file for divorce if u can no longer bear his attitude.
The choice is yours.

ImperialYoruba:


You and adaxxy should know ethnic bigotry is not to be taken out of politics and culture sections. Keep your Yoruba/Igbo stuff in those two places only. Please bro.

ivolt:


Please be reasonable, the man is deliberately ignoring her like some play kids
do when they quarrel.
Adults are supposed to voice their concern and not engage in cheap games.
It doesn't matter if she "trapped" him with pregnancy or if his family member
don't like her.

All he needed to do is sit her down and tell her his problems so they can
decide if to resolve it, stay together or separate.

This is one of the reasons I don't pity some men who are abandoned in
their old age because many have played god in their youths not knowing
that power is transient.

@favouredAda
Sit him down and also inform his closest family about his behaviours and if he does not change
after the discussion. You must start acting like he doesn't exist and stop expecting him to be
good to you. He is apparently enjoying his silly games. Find something worthwhile to do and not
kill yourself with thinking.

Exjoker:
Both of you need to for counseling...

Exjoker:
Both of you need to for counseling...

Daboomb:


This is real and very serious matter o!

- How was your courtship years like?
- Did you sound each other out at all?
- Did she cook for you before marriage and did you cook for her then?
- Do both of you do thing together and do oyu have "common interests" back then?
- Were you in-love with her before marriage (as in real passionate love that you cant do without seeing her for a day) and was she passionately inlove with you as well?
- What made the two of you to really decide you want to get married to each other? What was the conviction?
Finally
- Do you have children in the marriage right now?

I asked this question because l can "sense hatred" in this relationship and that is never a good sign because it does not get better!
Please dont get violent.
If things dont work out pretty soon and you dont have children between the two of you, l see that the hatred is sort of "mutual" (if she does not pick calls, does not cook for you, e.t.c ...l am not even sure two of you stii have sex with each other!). better to seek early divorce so that each of you can find happiness.
Life is too short to live in such poisnous atmosphere.