BeansAndBread:
I think this is caused because we've over adopted the Western Culture. I'll speak for Islam only; Islamically a woman bears her father's name even after marriage. So you'll find in many strict Islamic countries women despite after marriage still bear names like Zainab bint Mu'awiyah(Zainab daughter of Mu'awiyah).

So we need to do away with the Western Culture and adopt the Islamic one I know some people will pounce on me but that's the hard reality, we're still under the clutches of colonialism.

before the colonial masters, in Igbo culture, a married woman change hers to the husbands name.
So fvck u n ur islam.

Berlyn1:
I am Just here to read comments. ...ignore me

u r too beautiful to be ignore

Bahddo:
technically, women are purchased in Nigeria and many parts of the world. You are just being emotional about it.

Maybe for you but not me I am a human being and I have human rights and I am nobody's property.

BeansAndBread:
I think this is caused because we've over adopted the Western Culture. I'll speak for Islam only; Islamically a woman bears her father's name even after marriage. So you'll find in many strict Islamic countries women despite after marriage still bear names like Zainab bint Mu'awiyah(Zainab daughter of Mu'awiyah).

So we need to do away with the Western Culture and adopt the Islamic one I know some people will pounce on me but that's the hard reality, we're still under the clutches of colonialism.

Ironically Islam is not foreign to us too? If you want to go against "imposition" of foreign values then you give us the position in your native land. Don't you have native customs before the coming of islam to Nigeria?

BeansAndBread:
I think this is caused because we've over adopted the Western Culture. I'll speak for Islam only; Islamically a woman bears her father's name even after marriage. So you'll find in many strict Islamic countries women despite after marriage still bear names like Zainab bint Mu'awiyah(Zainab daughter of Mu'awiyah).

So we need to do away with the Western Culture and adopt the Islamic one I know some people will pounce on me but that's the hard reality, we're still under the clutches of colonialism.

This your argument is so stupid.
So as an african if I have to reject anything western, Islamic culture or whatever is the only alternative. What happens to the African way of life itself....

Ask those women who wants to keep their fathers name what surname their mother bears. Hipocrisy is feminism.!

Ladyhippolyta88:
Sister don't mind them imagine one was saying if you give women something they ask for more,like as if women are not human beings and have human rights.

Na their way.
Who are they even giving anything?
We are not asking unfortunately, we are telling them.
It's a choice, whether they like it or not.

ivolt:


If not slave mentality and bloated ego, why would you want your wife to adopt your name which is a British custom?
Even Islam that is so repressive of women recommends that women keep their maiden name.

Mr. Man please cut us the slack, how can you bring religion into this? Who told you adoption of a husband's name upon marriage is a foreign innovation in Africa? You're the one placing the foreign ideas too high. In Yorubaland from time immemorial, it has been the cusom that upon marriage a woman drops her father's name for her husband's.
Stop saying what you don't know, the fact that there was no formal documentation before the colonialists came doesn't mean we dont have it.


I wouldnt if you hold that we dont eat before the white men came.

ivolt:


If not slave mentality and bloated ego, why would you want your wife to adopt your name which is a British custom?
Even Islam that is so repressive of women recommends that women keep their maiden name.

Mr. Man please cut us the slack, how can you bring religion into this? Who told you adoption of a husband's name upon marriage is a foreign innovation in Africa? You're the one placing the foreign ideas too high. In Yorubaland from time immemorial, it has been the cusom that upon marriage a woman drops her father's name for her husband's.
Stop saying what you don't know, the fact that there was no formal documentation before the colonialists came doesn't mean we dont have it.


I wouldnt be surprise if you hold that we dont eat before the white men came.

Daeylar:


Na their way.
Who are they even giving anything?
We are not asking unfortunately, we are telling them.
It's a choice, whether they like it or not.

That is the simple truth.Our lives our business,it is part of fundamental human rights.

illicit:

This your argument is so stupid.
So as an african if I have to reject anything western, Islamic culture or whatever is the only alternative. What happens to the African way of life itself....

Leave him, as if Islam was invented by his fore fathers....just a case of a slave switching allegiance from Master A to Master B

FrenchWay:
...
Me wey be guy sef... If Dangote or Otedola gimme him daughter; I go even change my surname to their own.
My name Haliru Dutsinma go turn to Haliru Otedola

lmao ...see mad man

paulbets:

Exactly my view too.
I will not really care much if my wife takes up my surname. I will not object if she chose to answer her father's name only.
My main contest will be for my Children to bear my Surname only. They are free to fill their mother's maiden name when asked in a form.

The world is Patriarchal.

When it gets to the stage that children have to bear both their parents name; then their will be no need for ceremonious marriages as we have it today. What will be obtainable is for two people to come together to procreate and co-parent their offspring.

Still I often feel the concept of Marriage is unnecessarily overrated and over-demanded for... I think it serves no other purpose than to maintain the prevailing social structure.

Procreation, fertilisation, and reproduction occurs when a viable sperm meets a fertile egg.. it has nothing to do with ceremonies or legal agreement or traditional binding.

Am open to better expose though.

That is because the objective of marriage as it is meant to be, has been defeated.
Marriage was meant to be the union of a male and female coming together to become one, and become a creator. You become bonded in flesh and in spirit.
You become one spirit in two vessels.

What we have this days is civil union, because marriage is far deeper than what is going on this days.

But why the sudden campaign against it? How does it affect the woman or limit her?

Some if not most of the most powerful women in the world bear their husbands name. You only need to peruse the forbes most powerful list to see.

Most people don't even know Michelle Obama's maiden name till now. Obama has been her name even when Barrack was still unknown.


Anyway, i won't tolerate such insubordination in my house and that is what matters.

I don't care what hippie or new-age bullshitt other husbands do to look more modern which is more or less shallow.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Maybe for you but not me I am a human being and I have human rights and I am nobody's property.

I hope your people won't request for bride price.

If you see any woman who doesn't want to drop her surname when she marries, there's deep seated ego, brewing pride,Both would combine to wreck her marriage in no time. What she's doing consciously is clinging to the past while trying to move foward. And nobody who wants to run the race of life succeeds looking back.
Once two people come together to get married, the family they form is the most important, the families they left come second. But are feminist women are increasingly challenging the status quo of God that man heads a family. Small wonder divorce rates are spiralling out of control.

mylifeisagift:

All these plenty talks about keeping last name.
This is Africa and we have traditional rites that come with marriages..If it is the Husbands wish for the wife to keep her last name the prerogative is His..The wife has no claims to that..Except in very rare circumstances when branding is invloved..

lol it's not African tradition for a woman to keep her husbands last name .. it's western culture lol

fedorahat:


I hope your people won't request for bride price.

Don't worry about it We don't sell our daughters infact in my family we foot half of the wedding expenses .So I can categorically tell you that it is just the blessings of my parents,registry marriage or church wedding if money dey.We won't kill you and you didn't purchase me,I married you you married me simple as ABC.

kokomilala:
If you see any woman who doesn't want to drop her surname when she marries, there's deep seated ego, brewing pride,Both would combine to wreck her marriage in no time. What she's doing consciously is clinging to the past while trying to move foward. And nobody who wants to run the race of life succeeds looking back.
Once two people come together to get married, the family they form is the most important, the families they left come second. But are feminist women are increasingly challenging the status quo of God that man heads a family. Small wonder divorce rates are spiralling out of control.

It has nothing to do with feminism or religion it is just a fundamental human right.And in todays world your gender is not your determining factor.Which one is status quo it is always subject to change.

carinmom:
My family's name is equally important, I just can't imagine myself discarding it and adopting someone's name. What if the marriage did not work?

You re using ur fathers name now right.....ur kids will bear lets say segun mofedamijo,urs stella chukwe,u will have a hard time traveling out with those kids,ur name is different from theirs on the passport,secondly,ure recognised as mrs chukwu,ur kids a different name,its not flowing for the family sake,i believe ur mom used ur dads name,why d stress......its no biggie.

Mcnnamdi:
Ask those women who wants to keep their fathers name what surname their mother bears. Hipocrisy is feminism.!

None of the women in my family bears their husbands last name (both sides of my family )

BeansAndBread:
I think this is caused because we've over adopted the Western Culture. I'll speak for Islam only; Islamically a woman bears her father's name even after marriage. So you'll find in many strict Islamic countries women despite after marriage still bear names like Zainab bint Mu'awiyah(Zainab daughter of Mu'awiyah).

So we need to do away with the Western Culture and adopt the Islamic one I know some people will pounce on me but that's the hard reality, we're still under the clutches of colonialism.

That is not the point, after Zainab the daughter of who so ever gives birth, would her own children also bear Maryam the daughter of Zainab? Besides you do not need to Introduce religion to handle what rational thinking can handle. Islam is as evil as the colonial masters you . Islam is not free from political games too.


@Post, of the women like it, what is your own there?

Ladyhippolyta88:
Don't worry about it We don't sell our daughters infact in my family we foot half of the wedding expenses .So I can categorically tell you that it is just the blessings of my parents,registry marriage or church wedding if money dey.We won't kill you and you didn't purchase me,I married you you married me simple as ABC.

I said, I hope your people will not request bride price. Even if it is one naira.
Bride price and dowry are symbolic.

I hope they will not request bride price or they will reject it, if given.

What you just wrote points towards funding of marriage and marriage list.

This is different from marriage ceremony in our culture here.
If he gives you a ring on your wedding day.
You have been paid for.

cstr1001:
But why the sudden campaign against it? How does it affect the woman or limit her?

Some if not most of the most powerful women in the world bear their husbands name. You only need to peruse the forbes most powerful list to see.

Most people don't even know Michelle Obama's maiden name till now. Obama has been her name even when Barrack was still unknown.


Anyway, i won't tolerate such insubordination in my house and that is what matters.

I don't care what hippie or new-age bullshitt other husbands do to look more modern which is more or less shallow.

It is not your house alone but her's as well so it is our house.And you can't force her if she says she wants to keep it it is her choice to make.The time those one's change their names it was then but now it is their choice even Ivanka trump though married still bears her maiden name.And a lot of famous women too.

fedorahat:


I said, I hope your people will not request bride price. Even if it is one naira.
Bride price and dowry are symbolic.

I hope they will not request bride price or they will reject it, if given.

What you just wrote points towards funding of marriage and marriage list.

This is different from marriage ceremony in our culture here.
If he gives you a ring on your wedding day.
You have been paid for.

I say they would not request it haba and he did not pay for me or purchase me.And if I give him a ring me don pay for am.It is happening in my family we won't accept brideprice the blessings are enough.Nobody purchased me simple as XYZ.

Write2018:
It's a normal thing to have your hubby's name attached to yours for many reasons. Except you're a public figure what's the use of your father's name.

BTW, if you're a good content writer, send me a pm.

already did

mzfarayola:

already did

Did you get my msg?

Ladyhippolyta88:
Maybe for you but not me I am a human being and I have human rights and I am nobody's property.

then don't let anyone pay or receive any bride price or whatever, for you. Else, you are being sold and bought, whether you like it or not.

Doctorfitz:



Tell who pay ur bride price that. Here on nl I don't give a fvck booby doesn't give a flying fvck too.

Una go just come dey disturb person.

seriously who gives a Bleep me neither.....these over fed fools go just wake only to argue futility.............

The idea of perfect womanhood is perfect independence. Swami Vivekananda:

Write2018:
Did you get my msg?

yes I did. Thanks