Hi guys. k its my first time writing . I'd like you guys to critique my work do I can see how to improve it. thanks guys...

Chapter One
"Leave me alone!" she screamed as she ran for her life. Her pursuers two middle aged young men in blue jeans and nothing buy a black leather jacket on their torso paid her no heed. " Please...I wont tell anyone I swear" she pleaded as she kept running. "You better stop or we'l make it even more painful for you" the taller of the tei men threathened. she got to a bend on the street and darted into a bush part with the two men still in pursuit. still scared, her heart beating in her chest, it was midnight and it was a desert area. no one lived close by, no one to help her. she came to a crossroad and took her right. she sensed them getting closer. A tree she noticed was close by and his behind it crouching. she heard footsteps running past the tree and let out a sigh of relief. they had missed her she thought. still peeking from behind the tree, she tiptoed toward the dirt road, looking at the direction she thought she heard the footsteps run to. "they are gone" she thought.. gulping nervously she turned to GI back from where she came. A sound like a twig breaking made her jerk. she looked back at the tree. it was too quiet. cursed night. why did she ever go with Ebuka to "that" place...

an eerie new from a cat in the shrubs behind her made her turn around quickly...nothing there. suddenly she felt a blow on her head and blood trickle down her face..as she lost consciousness she turned to see her attacker...hammer. in his hands, she recognized him...the shock...the pain..and then another blow...and everything went dark...

guys please I need your contributions and ctitic if you are reading thanks

nice start up

devilmaycry1:
nice start up

thanks friend. more coming.