harakiri:

Okay.

I'm probably the worng person to say this because a lot of people already think I'm the female version of Lucifer, but I think the guy needs to do a proper reappriasal of himself. Dropping the girl might not be a bad idea either because after dating him for 4 years, she should have being a better influence than she is! She has as much blame as he does because she had the chance to help him come up with a better plan and she never did . . .

Neways I better get going before Aisha and David starts a deleiverance session for me! lol!

This guy is a fool! stop lying here on nl

forget this girl, use your 4 million to invest in some thing meaningful, buy a land and start building your own house since you are still in your mother's house.
start another relationship that will be due for marriage in a years time and you see this girl come crawling and begging you for marriage even at a registrar without reception party. Am a lady but i hate people wasting money they are suppose to invest on wedding ceremony, 1.5 milla is a huge expenses for wedding, remember the ceremony does not make the marriage to last what matters is love

You have the answers written all over u, u had better flee frm her like Joseph fleeing from Portiphars wife.

To me this is a disaster looking for a place to happen. Oju to ba ma bani kale ko ti aro se ipin( The eye that will last through a life time does not emitt mote in the morning) Look around you there are lots of good girls that will share ur dreams, tis one na Ajegunle what the assurance she wont bail when the chips are down remember nuffin is constant. Best of luck

Its this kind of thing that makes man unstable and frustrated.Its better that she is manifesting now before u tie the knots.It quakes my heart when I hear that the female folks whom are supposed to be supportive are behaving like this.These are the kind of ladies that ends up marrying a pauper.I had a similar experience but I did not bother to ask if she was the one cos' I could see the handwriting on the wall clearly.I totally disengaged my self from her.To crown it all,if i could be as rich and comfortable as I am now and someone out there is not showing appreciative gestures,damn!what would happen to me if the table happens to turn around?would she be there to even assist with words of encouragement?
GOD please take away these kind of ladies away from my route!

@poster for four years you date this girl you don't really know her. she is currently not working and she is saying your budgets is small i really wonder what will become of you when you are married. beware of the hand writing on the wall LOVE ALONE NO KEEP MARRIAGE.

marriage they say is a do or die affair  it is only god who can tell wit whom your future will be alright. take heart if she really is the one God will bring hearth together.

wao, i wonder why guys care for today and forget about the future, how can u plan to spend all your 5years savings in a day just to satisfy her and forget about ur future even in this economic recession. who knows tomorrow?who knows who is next? i am sure you are aware of  what is going on in your bank. Think less about loving her and follow your senses. i wonder how u could be dating a lady for 4years without knwin her what. i advice you pray to God and filter all our comments for your next move.

Ujujoan:

I'm probably the worng person to say this because a lot of people already think I'm the female version of Lucifer, but I think the guy needs to do a proper reappriasal of himself. Dropping the girl might not be a bad idea either because after dating him for 4 years, she should have being a better influence than she is! She has as much blame as he does because she had the chance to help him come up with a better plan and she never did . . .

Neways I better get going before Aisha and David starts a deleiverance session for me! lol!

Who ever said Lucifer was a man?

i wonder y she said u a re not ready for marriage, if its that the money budgeted for the wedding is not enough, i think she should go to hell and marry EZE EGO. think twice my brother, marriage is not about money but love and support

Cut your coat according to your size !

4m? Chai , go and do something better with that money.

Those who fail to drink water from the well of experience will one day die of thirst in the desert of IGNORANCE , Read between the LINES

---

!!!

you guys are not in love. yes ke! kana money cannot come between two people if they really love each other. bros i know correct chics wey just go get belle for man just because the man talk say money for wedding no dey. court marriage nko. dat one na shap shap.

she must be one of those 18 - 24 year old wey weather never beat well well. i do not blame her o! there's a lot of pressure on people of that age bracket. their gaga gast 2 be the best or else. ngwa nu make you cut yourself because u wan measure up. make ur mama no hear this jist o. if not e go collect her car from you and sack you from the house.

my advice. i neva said u shouldn't marry her, cos am sure she dey service you well well. else why u go dey confused by now, na she we for dey confused when u don hala zulu slap for her facial frontal elevation. bros abeg, the truth be say coming from where i come from, no woman big pass any man, after all we go all die one day even if she send u to an early grave. a man is supposed to be able to handle any woman. but it is weeping and gnashing of teeth if you attempt marriage with this girl without first of all getting all battle stations ready and having them all ready 'till death do you both part'. it is neva very clear bros. i don marry. u fit handle this girl well she go become a better woman than the other married women wey 'no dey give problem'. but the bible made it clear that it will be better for you to live in the wilderness or the corner of YOUR ROOF (for God's sake) than to have such a wife as that. but u know kini, we are all already living on the battle field as far as naija is concerned.

but i remember what my friend told me, 'it is better that the wife he will marry love him more than he loves her'. easier said than done because you cannot measure love. but in your case, you love this girl more than she loves u. even though i think she is still not yet weather beaten.

if you cannot have her to be submissive, then you do not have a wife. when i said battle stations must be ready, i didn't mean just ready. live ammo should be fired in salvos every now and then. yes ke, na so we dey do for village when we land so that niggas go know say other neegers dey around.

if you loved her, you for mend am well when she said u were not serious. so that she will either leave or stay. that way if she stays, maybe even after leaving for 6 months and back, she will be staying for good. ha! ha! thats the way our fathers did it. shoot at sight!

if you break up with her, you might regret it in the future trust me. when u now have a lady that cannot be measured up to her. if you did have such a lady, you wouldn't be confused, you would have quietly shown her the door.

By the way why don't you tell her the same thing you are telling us here. that you are considering breaking up because you think she is dumb. some of these girls are just that, dumb. but they grow up later. she may just want you on the terms that you be a bigger man without knowing what money is all about.

Bros, if you love her, control her. period!

PS: please remember that with such girls u need to do HIV and ZIV tests for 6 months before any bare skin thing. am sure that doesn't count for you since u love her so much and invariably trust her so much.

bros, na out of experience and watching the fathers in our lives when we were kids.

thank you for sharing

Wazobia sure knows a thing or two.

my dear its a pity dat a girl u wants to marry is exhibiting such a behavior but on the other hand u ought to thank God for revealing it to u early enof. i agree with some of the post abt u not being blinded with infatuation thinking its love. wat does she mean by u disgracing her wit 1.5million wedding? beta think well now that u hav d opportunity to do so.

If you guys weren't so hypocritical you'd look beyond your sentiments and see the reasoning behind my post! I certainly do not subscribe to the girl's manner of approach and she definitely doesn't have the right to judge because she's as good as useless herself!

But how can a grown up man who has been working and earning a reasonable pay for 5 whole years not be able to plan his life properly? So all the while he never knew that a day would come when he would need to get married, leave his mother's house, buy his own car and take care of his family? What was he thinking? That he would marry Obasanjo's daughter?

Clearly he needs to cut his coat according to his size and he might as well dump this idea of doing everything at once because he's not that rich! He also needs to set his priorities right! Maybe he's not ready to get married afterall . .  

I thought you would have your head checked before making another post, instead you elevated your post to another level of  materialism and stupidity. What's is the correlation between living with his parents and being rich. Are you saying that had he lived independently that he would have saved huge money in order to throw a big wedding for his penniless girlfriend? Did he complain to us that by doing everything at the same time that it would be much to handle? Is the girlfriend saying that he should have bought a car before talking about marriage or that he should be looking for 2008 model instead of 2005? This is Naija where siblings live with their parents until they are ready for a new life. A man who has got this amount saved and still decided to live with his parents is humble and well raised, but Naija girls are not looking at your humility, but your big pockets even if they eat  0 1 0. Marriage is to them is like a Casino to a compulsive gambler

What do you mean that he's not that rich? How many eligible guys in Naija have saved up this amount  for a new life? I bet you that most  young couples in the west do not even have this amount saved.

Why crucify the guy? Anyways, it's Naija where Ibori and Yerima get  the youngest and  hottest chics. Wait for them cos they have pot bellies, dollars, pounds and  you will be made the 5th wife - still counting.Good luck

adconline:

I thought you would have your head checked before making another post, instead you elevated your post to another level of materialism and stupidity. What's is the correlation between living with his parents and being rich. Are you saying that had he lived independently that he would have saved huge money in order to throw a big wedding for his penniless girlfriend? Did he complain to us that by doing everything at the same time that it would be much to handle? Is the girlfriend saying that he should have bought a car before talking about marriage or that he should be looking for 2008 model instead of 2005? This is Naija where siblings live with their parents until they are ready for a new life. A man who has got this amount saved and still decided to live with his parents is humble and well raised, but Naija girls are not looking at your humility, but your big pockets even if they eat 0 1 0. Marriage is to them is like a Casino to a compulsive gambler

What do you mean that he's not that rich? How many eligible guys in Naija have saved up this amount for a new life? I bet you that most young couples in the west do not even have this amount saved.

Why crucify the guy? Anyways, it's Naija where Ibori and Yerima get the youngest and hottest chics. Wait for them cos they have pot bellies, dollars, pounds and you will be made the 5th wife - still counting.Good luck

You can say what you like, it only highlights your narrow mindedness!

If a man @ 30 is still whinning over the fact that his life is not well coordinated then I don't want to be a party to finding someone to pass the blame on. He dated the gilr for 4 years and you are here telling him how matereialistic she is. Isn't that just another indication of how daft he is? After four years he doesn't know who his GF really is!

And please whenever you feel like making a baseless conclusion about my personal life, try and exercise some restrain b/cos what you know about me couldn't even form a tear drop!

[b]Quote from: Ujujoan on Today:
You can say what you like, it only highlights your narrow mindedness!

If a man @ 30 is still whinning over the fact that his life is not well coordinated then I don't want to be a party to finding someone to pass the blame on. He dated the gilr for 4 years and you are here telling him how matereialistic she is. Isn't that just another indication of how daft he is? After four years he doesn't know who his GF really is!

And please whenever you feel like making a baseless conclusion about my personal life, try and exercise some restrain b/cos what you know about me couldn't even form a tear drop! Angry Angry[/b

@ Poster
If you have dispute with the Monkey, do not call the Baboon to be the Judge !

Uju sorry to say this but your posts are off points. A guy of 30 with about 4mil saved in this present naija is a success. Go figure!!!

lol i wonder why Uju is still posting. A girl who has no job and no savings of her own is complaining that N4m is too small for a wedding and a start at life? I'm glad God keeps women like you and the gf here away from my path.

davidylan:

lol i wonder why Uju is still posting. A girl who has no job and no savings of her own is complaining that N4m is too small for a wedding and a start at life? I'm glad God keeps women like you and the gf here away from my path.

Roflmao

@post
Excuse me but ur gf is completely bonkers. I hate beetches like her. Gosh

i don't know your situation. but i'll like you to know this.

a man is not a man if he ain't got not independence.

do whatever you feel is right. you don't need to leave your mum and neglect her. but get your own ride dude.

as for your bitch of a wife(-to-be)?

it would have been a different thing if she was bringing part of the bread.

sign ur marriage in a court.
get urself a ride
a place (maybe)
travel or honeymoon someplace nice.

keep the change and carry on with life.

i dont see a point in a freaking ceremony if you are flat broke the morning after.

live your life dude.
be yourself
and good things will come to you

I will not condemn the girl. If she's a top class beauty or has other options then maybe u were deceiving yourself. All I can advise is try and convince her if u really love her. If not runnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.

You can say what you like, it only highlights your narrow mindedness!

If a man @ 30 is still whinning over the fact that his life is not well coordinated then I don't want to be a party to finding someone to pass the blame on. He dated the gilr for 4 years and you are here telling him how matereialistic she is. Isn't that just another indication of how daft he is? After four years he doesn't know who his GF really is!

And please whenever you feel like making a baseless conclusion about my personal life, try and exercise some restrain b/cos what you know about me couldn't even form a tear drop!

I  don’t know you, but I have made deductions  from your post. The context of this discussion is premised on your attack on a guy who saved N4 million in relation to a GF who is penniless. Your argument is baseless because you sided with a girl who dated a man for 2 years only to find out that the man got a wife at home, while you are attacking someone who who's got no wife, wants to settle and really means business- your benchmark is that he's not independent. Your argument is also sheepish, because someone who has not had a car, now wants a 2008 model, so if  she were making these demands from the onset, this relationship would not have lasted for 4yrs or she would have been rolling with ballers and yahoo boys.
You are the one making an irrational argument here, because the guy in question is ready as hell, but same thing cannot be said of GF. Or if the penniless GF had insisted on N100 million wedding  4yrs ago that the boy would have stuck around?
I dont need more about your personal life cos this is faceless and nameless forum, but you have given us an insight on your values.  Folks like you should be up front about it " I need a sugar daddy husband"

Basically the girl in question here isn't being considerate. PURGE her like a CATHARSIS!

typical!!!!!!!!!!!

Another so called educated girl/woman that likes to demand money but she is jobless.

We are now in the 21st century. I beleive both man and woman should share the responsibilities of running a home be it financial, domestic, etc

This girl will make you steal one day to support her demands. She needs to get a job  for a start and start contributing to the funds.

But seriously bros until you actually leave the parental crib no matter how much money you save I cannot take you seriously. Do you plan

to marry then take your new wife to live with your parents for "a short time while you keep on saving??"

You are only asking for trouble. Actions speak louder than words, you need:

your own crib, learn how to support yourself, then you may just be ready to support a wife, children, etc.

It does not happen overnight, it takes practice, patience, prayer etc do not walk before you can crawl.

Most importantly know your budget discuss with wifey and stick to it. Do not overspend bros times are hard.

TOPE2000!:


@post
Excuse me but your gf is completely bonkers. I hate beetches like her. Gosh

madam TOPE na you be dis how far

abi oo. the girl better cool down jor and reason with the dude at least since she is a graduate she can always get a job and live the kind of lifestyle she visioned or better still go and marry one of dangotes son if he still have any left.

@ poster

I had something a little similar to yours. As soon as I made up my mind to marry my girl, i proposed then without telling her got a 2 bedroom flat. on the wedding plan, her taste was high into the sky but i stood my ground and told her what my budget was broken down to timetable. when she did agree, I told her she does not have that choice, i only informed her for her to coperate.

marriage is more inportant to me than wedding, maybe she is planning for the wedding and not for the marriage. you are the man here. the money comes from you, let her make input but take what is in line with your budget or rather mandate her to think and work within a certain budget.

Women are the same everywhere, with a few of them considerate to an extent. imagine uju's line of thought, thats how they are cut to be, just understand them and you can handle them. the line of thought for a few of them, is wack.

I have heard this same theory that women are the same everywhere but still refuse to believe it.

Ujujoan:

You can say what you like, it only highlights your narrow mindedness!

If a man @ 30 is still whinning over the fact that his life is not well coordinated then I don't want to be a party to finding someone to pass the blame on. He dated the gilr for 4 years and you are here telling him how matereialistic she is. Isn't that just another indication of how daft he is? After four years he doesn't know who his GF really is!

And please whenever you feel like making a baseless conclusion about my personal life, try and exercise some restrain b/cos what you know about me couldn't even form a tear drop!

There are only two kinda peeps on Nairaland;Those who make sensible contributions and those who only wanna be heard even when there deductions/conclusions are quite senseless and baseless,my dear uju,u fall into the latter category.
I fink there should be some IQ restrictions for some forums/discussions