Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? - Romance - Nairaland
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? (1017 Views)
Can There Be Love Without Trust Or Can There Be Trust Without Love In A Relation / Is marriage without trust possible / Is It Possible To Use Finger To Dis-virgin A Girl? (2) (3) (4)
| Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by NwaanyiAnambra(f): 8:07am On May 20, 2018 |
My dear nairalanders, greetings to you all. Please I will want to know if it is possible to love someone unconditionally without Trusting him. I met this guy in my days at the University, I was so young and naive, I didn't really understand love then. But we became close friends, inseparable, and eventually became lovers. He took my innocence. I was so comfortable with him to the extent that I believed he wouldn't do anything to hurt me. I found out that he cheated on me. I was really hurt, but I forgave after he apologized promised it won't happen again. But then he had shattered the trust I had for him. It made me become curious, always wondering what he is doing when we aren't together. Fast forward to today. We go married last December, and I'm trying to build back dat trust I had for him cos I love him, but it ain't working out cos he is still cheating. D problem is that I love dis guy, I ve tried to ignore his unfaithfulness, but I can't. I don't know if I can continue loving him without Trusting him. I don't wanna scatter our marriage at dis early stage. Plz advice is needed. Cos he's killing me softly inside. |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by IamD18: 8:13am On May 20, 2018 |
It is impossible to love with trust, and because of that, there's no LOVE. 4 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 8:19am On May 20, 2018 |
You gave him your virginity because you was young and naive.. He cheated on you, he apologies and you accepted him back.. He still cheats on you, yet you got married to him.. Sorry op but i think you are old now but still naive.. It's like the love is only from you because you cannot love a lady and constantly cheat on her.. He don't love you.. my advice to you is to dumb him and save your self from stress all because of a cheating man.. Forget about the marriage, you cannot be in a marriage that is sucking your life gradually.. Your marriage is like tramadol drug, it is gradually taking your wellbeing unknowingly.. Don't worry, in no time, a good loving guy will love you totally. There are still good guys out there, while settle for a cheat? 6 Likes |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by chigoizie7(m): 8:24am On May 20, 2018 |
That is your family problem, deal with it 2 Likes |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by UDUJ(m): 8:25am On May 20, 2018 |
Love and trust are two different things. Yes, you can love someone without trusting them. Likewise, you can trust someone without loving them. The problem is that it’s very difficult to maintain a loving relationship with someone you don’t trust, let alone for that relationship to be either healthy or happy. The notion of loving someone we don't trust may seem odd or contradictory, but none the less, I believe it is definitely possible, and unfortunately way too common. To help put this possibility in perspective, let me ask you some simple questions to serve as an analogy. Can you feed someone, and make sure thy eat without trusting them? Can you take someone to the doctor and see that they are cared for and medically well and healthy without trusting them? Can you love and care for a wounded pet or animal that you don't trust and fear may bite you? If you answered yes to all three questions then you probably get it. My point is, we can do things like this (above) with and for each other as well if we choose, out of pure love for a person or creature, regardless of whether we trust them or not. So the simple part of my point, and this post, is that it's possible to love someone you don't trust. The complex part is that it is this very ability, or tendency, to love without trust, that complicates and prolongs unhealthy relationships. That is where the possibility lends itself to a potentially problematic cycle. Why is it that we are unable to fully love someone inside a relationship with someone we don't fully trust? The problem with being able to love without trust is this: we get in relationships with people because we love them (not a problem), BUT, we also STAY in the relationship because we love them, even AFTER we stop trusting them (problem). That is not healthy. 4 Likes 4 Shares
|
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by NwaanyiAnambra(f): 8:30am On May 20, 2018 |
DrinkLimca: DrinkLimca: He makese me feel he loves me even up till now. nothing really changed as regards to how he treats me.Dat is confusing me....how can he treat me like a queen and yet cheat on me. I'm currently 3months pregnant for him |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by NwaanyiAnambra(f): 8:33am On May 20, 2018 |
chigoizie7:I am dealing with it SIR 1 Like |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by LordKO(m): 8:33am On May 20, 2018 |
Yes, it's possible to love (whether the big love or small love) without trust - unconditionality of love makes it so. However, it's practically impossible for any sane person to stay in love without trust or experience healthy relationship where there's no trust. 2 Likes |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Lonestar124: 8:42am On May 20, 2018 |
As in he's practicing infidelity after marriage....Some men are born different. Sister don't let it be a burden to you, respect him as your husband, play the role of Christian wife, act like you don't know what is transpiring, see that as his imperfection Always censor any information you receive from friends Don't believe in hearsays.build your marriage in trust and don't delete the trust...No matters. Your husband is human being with conscious surely he will count his teeth with tongue..if only you're pure consciously. 1 Like |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Iamdmentor1(m): 8:44am On May 20, 2018 |
Just as the body without a soul is dead, so is love without trust |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 8:46am On May 20, 2018 |
NwaanyiAnambra:Hmm well there are guys like that but note, for the fact that he treats you like a queen do not mean he loves you very much.. As per your condition, he wants to take care of his child and the mother of his child. it's like you are a married baby mama, no offense.. Well for the sake of your child, stay with him till after you must have given birth, then talk to your parents.. Note there are many dangers involved in sleeping with a cheating partner.. What if he contacts sexual diseases elsewhere and transfers it to you? Some side chicks can cause harm to the original wife just to take over.. Look i am not trying to scare you from your marriage, i just want you to be happy.. 1 Like |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 8:49am On May 20, 2018 |
NwaanyiAnambra:Nawa ooo, this one serious oh, well there are sometins u cn't change in Life, you jst have to live with it... 1 Like |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 8:50am On May 20, 2018 |
Wetin concern us. For beta for worse. Y not divorce him. Ndi ara |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Headlesschicken(m): 8:52am On May 20, 2018 |
 Once a cheater, always a cheat... I guess u wia d one in love wiv him n not d other way around,d n!gga probably married u cos u wia very naive n can take any sh!t he throws at u,thats not love,i always say dix that whomever u cannot fix in Yuh relationship u cannot fix in marriage... I just pray he respects u enuf to actually use condoms....2 Likes |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by austyn0(m): 8:52am On May 20, 2018 |
If this was an ordinary lovers relationship it would have been easier,, this is your marriage,, a lifetime submission....Dear,, you gotta call on God, day in day out,, He is the number 1 solution,, then you can talk to your husband about your worries,, it appears you haven't done that,, it's wrong to bring it here whereas you haven't reasoned the issue with your husby. Finally,, seek counsel from relationship experts. 1 Like |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 8:53am On May 20, 2018 |
Sometimes men cheat not because they don't love their wives but because.... Hmmmm I really don't even know why they cheat  You already know he's a cheat and yet married him. Better you live with that fact and hopes he changes and don't over stress yourself. Life is short. |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 8:54am On May 20, 2018 |
"For better for worse" "In sickness and in health" "In poverty and in wealth" BTW this story is fake. |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 8:55am On May 20, 2018 |
yeyerolling:This early Sunday morning  |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by chinnyness122(f): 8:55am On May 20, 2018 |
men are hard to understand shaa. later they will say women are complicated....mtchw |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by chinnyness122(f): 8:55am On May 20, 2018 |
OP, nobody is perfect. it is our imperfections that make us humans. You caught him cheating, u forgave and married him. I think u should be able to live with it cos u knew wat u were getting into before u married him. try as much as u can to ignore him, build ursef up for the sake of ur baby and don't forget to always pray for him |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 8:56am On May 20, 2018 |
NwanyiAwkaetiti:yes. Some1 cheated on u , u still married him. Abeg carry ur cross. Advice him to be using condom |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by NwaanyiAnambra(f): 9:02am On May 20, 2018 |
austyn0:I have talked to him severally, each time we talk about how he hurts me, he becomes so emotional, proclaiming love to d moon and Jupiter and how he's gonna change bla bla bla. I ain't seeing the change |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Cutehector(m): 9:03am On May 20, 2018 |
I can't commit myself to you if I can't trust you to an extent. |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by 912(m): 9:04am On May 20, 2018 |
NwaanyiAnambra: It's because you love him that's why you can't ignore his unfaithfulness. If you truly love someone you wouldn't want to share him with anyone or even stomach the idea that he finds comfort in the hands of someone else. You need to have a frank talk with him. Let him know how you feel about him cheating and make him understand how badly it's hurting you. Then give him a sound warning that even though you really want the marriage to work, he shouldn't bet on you sacrificing your dignity and mental health for someone who doesn't deserve it. So it's either he puts an end to it all (with proof) or you walk. And one more thing, this is the most important thing to do. When you are talking to him about this show no emotions. I repeat, show no emotions. Men play on the emotions of people that love them whenever they want to get out of sticky situations. All we need do is act sad and remorseful, then call you all the love names we know you like to hear and even shed a tear or two. That works like magic. But if you really want result, do not show any emotion when he does all this. And don't let him touch you. If he tries tell him to let go immediately. Once he knows he can't play you he would feel your love is dwindling and understand that there is the possibility of him loosing you. 1 Like |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by BiafranBushBoy: 9:06am On May 20, 2018 |
You are gonna end up so miserable |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by NwaanyiAnambra(f): 9:06am On May 20, 2018 |
Hanseel1:U think I will just sit down and manufacture a fake story? I ve been following nairaland as a visitor for a long time and I've seen how people get help on daily basis. So if I seek for help, my story becomes fake? Mchw |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 9:13am On May 20, 2018 |
NwaanyiAnambra: Is this how you talk to people in real life? This post says it all.. |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by austyn0(m): 9:16am On May 20, 2018 |
NwaanyiAnambra:Just as I adviced earlier,, pray to God constantly abou it, and hope for change...Seek counsel from relationship experts,, start the fight to keep your marriage NOW! 1 Like |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by chinnyness122(f): 9:17am On May 20, 2018 |
Hanseel1:Mr. Perfect. why would u call her post a fake in d first place? and what exactly is wrong with wat she said? |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 9:56am On May 20, 2018 |
yeyerolling:I ain't the op biko |
| Re: Is It Possible To Love Without Trust? by Nobody: 10:00am On May 20, 2018 |
NwanyiAwkaetiti:  two option divorce or endure. D ball is in her court |
(1) (Reply)
I Hate Children! / How To Love A Highly Sensitive Woman / Boy Child Sexual Predators Share Your Experiences
(Go Up)
| Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 53 |