Elder001:


Greiboy sup?

Mum will always be no1 even in marriage.

One man said up there that there are things your mum can't offer you, LOL is there anything other than sex that a girlfriend can give that a mum can't give?
so you gonna choose a girlfriend over mum because of sex?
Mum is mum... you can never compare wife or girlfriend to your mum

Well said bro

My mom always stood by me and will always stay by me.

The only person that believes in me always.

The only woman that will always make me laugh when I am sad or down

The only one that will always provide a shoulder to cry on

Some ladies can do all these, but they are extremely rare. Thus, I will stick with my mom any day, anytime.

EzendiEgo1:
OK

nice to your advice

So do you live your man more than your father
Be sincere

My father is deceased. There is a different kind of love for a spouse than the love of a parent. The love for a spouse can be greater than the love for a parent, it depends on the parents and the spouse.

khiaa:


I know you are wondering how can a human being do this to another human being, well that is easy, take away the humanity. As long as they could convince themselves that Africans weren't human but a beast to toil the land they could treat them any way they wanted and that is what they did/do, treated them worse than their dogs. The sad thing is they haven't changed they are still treating blacks as a beast and not human. We are still considered beast in the United States Constitution, it hasn't changed or been rewritten and that's why they can shoot us down like dogs and get away with it.

it's sad so sad i never knew whites can be this cruel , I know that that they are racist,but this gosh! you know here in Nigerian, we see them as saints. See them as demi-gods . What the media show us ,it's what we see,and what we belive

I think u should created a thread about this, so that a lot of young people will have different views on how they see whites

khiaa:


My father is deceased. There is a different kind of love for a spouse than the love of a parent. The love for a spouse can be greater than the love for a parent, it depends on the parents and the spouse.

Sorry for your lost.

Different type of love or you mean level of love

EzendiEgo1:
Sorry for your lost.

Different type of love or you mean level of love

I mean a different type of love, the kind of love that you honor, and cherish, a romantic love sort of speak. A spouse could be your lover, your protector, your friend, your confidant, your ride and die, while your parent has always been a stranger to you and in some cases not even a part of your life, so who would your loyalty be towards?

khiaa:


I mean a different type of love, the kind of love that you honor, and cherish, a romantic love sort of speak. A spouse could be your lover, your protector, your friend, your confidant, your ride and die, while your parent has always been a stranger to you and in some cases not even a part of your life, so who would your loyalty be towards?

why should my parents be a stranger to me, I am alive today was because of how much they devoted in caring for me and you say they are always a stranger.
A spouse could be your lover, your protector, your friend, your confidant, your ride and die,

all this quality you mentioned can never be seen in 21st century wife.

I will always love my mom my parents more than a stupid girlfriend

EzendiEgo1:
why should my parents be a stranger to me, I am alive today was because of how much they devoted in caring for me and you say they are always a stranger.
A spouse could be your lover, your protector, your friend, your confidant, your ride and die,

all this quality you mentioned can never be seen in 21st century wife.

I will always love my mom my parents more than a stupid girlfriend

You are right, I stand corrected. You said girlfriend not wife.

khiaa:


You are right, I stand corrected. You said girlfriend not wife.

yes I did

Elder001:

But some women still care for their siblings and parents more than they care for their husbands and kids.
They love their siblings and parents more than their husbands.

Shouldn't their responsibility change to their husbands and kids too?

Yes it happens,
I agree and it is the same point I was making.
Your spouse should come first but everyone has an opinion.Personally I won't marry a man that thinks that way.

TonyeBarcanista:

On the contrary...

Once married, my wife is upgraded to the same level of my sisters being that she has by virtue of marriage become a daughter of my mother, and part of the family.

My mother owns me and all that I have. She has the right to come to my house and live as long as she desires without needing permission or approval from me. She us the ONLY woman in the world that I know will never abandon me even in my worst. But I can't say same of my wife, I can only hope. The sacrifices and prayer my mom (and my father too) has made for me shall NEVER be inherited by another woman called wife, however, my wife will be loved and treated like a queen. But my mom remains QUEEN MOTHER While my dad, my GODFATHER.

However, it is incumbent on my wife to learn to be a good daughter and not try to upstage my mom in the order of affection in my heart because it will NEVER work. In fact, disrespecting my mom is a divorce offence... Just as I can't disrespect my mother or father...

My mother subjected herself to my father's mother, she earned the love of my father's mother even more than my father. In fact, my grandma loved my mom more than she loved my father (her son). Hence, my mom inherited the place of my grandma upon her demise and has been enjoying it. So I expect same from my wife. Women should respect hierarchy!

As for my kids, they are my mom's grandkids and subject to the authority of my mom just as I was subject to the authority of my father's mom, my grandma of blessed memory.

Meanwhile, I can't marry a woman that disrespects her mom or one that show sign of "taking over" my life from my mom.

I'm not against what you said. You will see I said the place of a wife and a mother is different, so is the love you have for each of them. What am I saying is once a man realize this, he wouldn't need to start wondering who he should love most between his mother and his wife.
And like you said, once you get married, your wife becomes your mother's daughter, which upgrades her to the level of your sisters. Don't you sometimes disagree with your mom to agree with your sisters and at other times you agree with your mom to disagree with your sisters. Those times you disagree with your mom, does that make you love her less? Or is it your sisters you love less when you disagree with them? I'm only saying a guy shouldn't have a problem with who he loves most between his mother and his wife once he realizes the importance and responsibilities of the two of them in his life. He shouldn't even show one he loves her more than the other, esp when it comes to the wife, he shouldn't show her he loves his mom than he loves her.
And of course, a wife in her right sense would see her husband's mother as her own mother and wouldn't even try to compete with her. But seriously, most times self when a wife is competing with her husband's mother, the fault is likely from the husband, it's because the husband shows her he loves his mom more than he do love her. You might love your mom more than your wife, but never show it.
You need to understand that once you get married, there's a limit to which you can be a mama's boy. Some decisions are to be made by you and your wife and not you and your mother, some stuffs are to be shared with your wife and not mother, by so doing, you would even encourage a healthy relationship between the two.
And you also talked about your kids. No doubt, your kids belong to your mother, she's their grandmother, but do not forget your wife is their mother. The same way your mother taught you what's right and wrong, prayed for you, protect you, scold you, cared for you, is the same way you should allow your wife have a say over her kids. The truth is no matter how caring, awesome and wonderful their grandmother is to them, she would never understand them like their mother would. There's just this Natural connection between a child and the mother. Trust me, it's so easy for a child to hate the grandparents, even the father but you will agree with me it takes a lot before a child can hate the mother. So to me, your wife rather than your mom should have the first say when it comes to your kids. Even you, when it comes to your kids should have a say over them than your mother does. Yes, your kids are subject to the authority of your mother but that comes after they are already subjected to that of you and your wife.

queenitee:

I'm not against what you said. You will see I said the place of a wife and a mother is different, so is the love you have for each of them. What am I saying is once a man realize this, he wouldn't need to start wondering who he should love most between his mother and his wife.
And like you said, once you get married, your wife becomes your mother's daughter, which upgrades her to the level of your sisters. Don't you sometimes disagree with your mom to agree with your sisters and at other times you agree with your mom to disagree with your sisters. Those times you disagree with your mom, does that make you love her less? Or is it your sisters you love less when you disagree with them? I'm only saying a guy shouldn't have a problem with who he loves most between his mother and his wife once he realizes the importance and responsibilities of the two of them in his life. He shouldn't even show one he loves her more than the other, esp when it comes to the wife, he shouldn't show her he loves his mom than he loves her.
And of course, a wife in her right sense would see her husband's mother as her own mother and wouldn't even try to compete with her. But seriously, most times self when a wife is competing with her husband's mother, the fault is likely from the husband, it's because the husband shows her he loves his mom more than he do love her. You might love your mom more than your wife, but never show it.
You need to understand that once you get married, there's a limit to which you can be a mama's boy. Some decisions are to be made by you and your wife and not you and your mother, some stuffs are to be shared with your wife and not mother, by so doing, you would even encourage a healthy relationship between the two.
And you also talked about your kids. No doubt, your kids belong to your mother, she's their grandmother, but do not forget your wife is their mother. The same way your mother taught you what's right and wrong, prayed for you, protect you, scold you, cared for you, is the same way you should allow your wife have a say over her kids. The truth is no matter how caring, awesome and wonderful their grandmother is to them, she would never understand them like their mother would. There's just this Natural connection between a child and the mother. Trust me, it's so easy for a child to hate the grandparents, even the father but you will agree with me it takes a lot before a child can hate the mother. So to me, your wife rather than your mom should have the first say when it comes to your kids. Even you, when it comes to your kids should have a say over them than your mother does. Yes, your kids are subject to the authority of your mother but that comes after they are already subjected to that of you and your wife.

For clarification, the reason why this subject is being discussed is due to this argument by "wives" claiming ownership of the man over membership of his family, including his mother.

Like I earlier pointed, my wife will never be treated as second tier but she should zero every attempt to place herself higher than mother in hierarchy. That I marry wont stop gists and plays I do have with my mom and siblings. They will go on as long as it takes. However, I will ensure that my wife is properly integrated in the scheme of things and carried along. I trust my mother, she treats young people like hers and she will love my wife more than she love me.

As for taking decision as a man, even as a Bachelor I make my own decision and I believe it won't change in the nearest future. I am a man of myself not a baby elephant.

Now to my kids, of course, they are my wife's kids and she has the primary duty to love and care for them just like I do. She(and myself) has FULL authority over the kids, but the higher authority remains my parents, I trust my parents, they don't take advantage of things.

BTW There is nothing I can't share with my mother whether I'm married or unmarried except other room things

TonyeBarcanista:

That the Bible says a man and a woman become one flesh in marriage is not synonymous to a wife becoming more valuable than the mother of her husband. There is NO record of such Biblically. In fact, the Bible continuously commanded men to always be subjected to their parents so that their days will be long.

The wife is the flesh of the man NOT the mother of the man. She is the Daughter in-law to the man's mother not the godmother of the man. She is lower in status to the mother of the man, it doesn't mean she isn't loved. But we should recognize hierarchy

The Bible says that where it said that a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife. There was no other mention of a man being attached to his mum after he gets married.

TonyeBarcanista:

For clarification, the reason why this subject is being discussed is due to this argument by "wives" claiming ownership of the man over membership of his family, including his mother.

Like I earlier pointed, my wife will never be treated as second tier but she should zero every attempt to place herself higher than mother in hierarchy. That I marry wont stop gists and plays I do have with my mom and siblings. They will go on as long as it takes. However, I will ensure that my wife is properly integrated in the scheme of things and carried along. I trust my mother, she treats young people like hers and she will love my wife more than she love me.

As for taking decision as a man, even as a Bachelor I make my own decision and I believe it won't change in the nearest future. I am a man of myself not a baby elephant.

Now to my kids, of course, they are my wife's kids and she has the primary duty to love and care for them just like I do. She(and myself) has FULL authority over the kids, but the higher authority remains my parents, I trust my parents, they don't take advantage of things.

BTW There is nothing I can't share with my mother whether I'm married or unmarried except other room things

Fine, all I'm saying is encourage a healthy relationship between your mom and your wife. Don't give your wife reason to compete with your mom and also, let her have a say in issues.
I did not say you shouldn't share things with your mom, I only said you should make a decision with your wife and not her.

Saviour22:
it's sad so sad i never knew whites can be this cruel , I know that that they are racist,but this gosh! you know here in Nigerian, we see them as saints. See them as demi-gods . What the media show us ,it's what we see,and what we belive

I think u should created a thread about this, so that a lot of young people will have different views on how they see whites

No their not saints bro. The white man controls the Nigerian media and most media’s in the world. They do some of the cruelest things but because they control the media they can sweep it under the carpet and paint themselves as saints. They’ve done and continue to do so many heinous acts. For example they created AIDS and Ebola to kill our people, they destabilize and colonize and exploit many countries, they are spreading hatred towards Africans in the global media by painting us as as mud hut dwelling savages, they pit Black Americans and Africans against each other causing animosity between the two groups
Cc: musicwriter

Favor99:

No their not saints bro. The white man controls the Nigerian media and most media’s in the world. They do some of the cruelest things but because they control the media they can sweep it under the carpet and paint themselves as saints. They’ve done and continue to do so many heinous acts. For example they created AIDS and Ebola to kill our people, they destabilize and colonize and exploit many countries, they are spreading hatred towards Africans in the global media by painting us as as mud hut dwelling savages, they pit Black Americans and Africans against each other causing animosity between the two groups
Cc: musicwriter

Shut that your dirty mouth up

What nonsense are you saying

White controls Social media

Ignorance is a disease indeed

Imaima1111:


The Bible says that where it said that a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife. There was no other mention of a man being attached to his mum after he gets married.

That passage's context was about "divorce". The Bible never inferred that the woman owns the man by marriage, it simply say that the man and the woman becomes ONE (joined together) in marriage. It doesn't mean the right of the man has been taken over by the wife over his family. That's not the idea...

When the sons of Jacob married they were still subject to their parents authority along with their wives who were treated like daughters of their husband's parents not "Queen mothers". The status of parents and importance in a man's life remains till the parents depart the world...

AstroG:
Every body has his/her opinion,u cannot come and your opinion tinking it will be the same with others, HELL NO..

To me,my Mother comes First in Everything in my life even when I marry(if self I will marry),
After God,Jes[/s]us and Ma[s]ry,My MUM Is the Most precious BEING IN MY LIFE,
She is worth more than Gold,Diamond or Silver,
I can't trade her for Anything,
I can kill for her,
She is MY ALL AND ALL
MY ONE AND ONLY..
I will Choose my Mum to Live an Everlasting Life for me to Marriage
It is beta to be Single and take care of my mum than to Marry and neglect her....
MUM,MAY GOD BLESS AND FAVOUR YOU WILL GOOD HEALTH AND LONG LIFE FOR ME..AMEN



WHO GIRLFRIEND OR WIFE EPP ??

That's better.