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3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by topday1(f): 2:08pm On Mar 21, 2007 |
Am really confused now and i need serious advise. This is a matter of love, family interests and money. i am 28, have a nice job and single, desperately wanting to marry soonest. i broke up with my boyfriend of over 2 years because we were always querelling over trivial issues. We met during NYSC and all through d 2yrs we dated he didn't get a job. He humiliated me so much with d way he treated me later on that i had to quit. 3 months after, he just got a job with one of d oil companies and is begging me to come back. we are of d same age, n with d way he treated me, am not sure if i want to marry him even though i luved him. besides my family didn't support because of his age. After i broke up with this guy in November, i was so devasted. i have been under enormous pressure 2 get married, from family and friends. i live with my brother at d moment n is no fun for me. my family would not let me live alone. with all these pressures i established contact with this guy, Temi who had proposed to me 7 years ago while we were in schl. He is crazy about me but i never liked him one bit. d moment i called him in december, he sent away his girlfriend and came after me. we were even planning our wedding, but d problem is, i am not attracted to him. He works in an oil company too, and he's offering me everything a girl would dream of in a marriage, but i find it difficult to love him. not even 1%. last week i told him my mind, that i don't feel something for him n i want him to give me more space, n halt d wedding plans. right now, d guy keeps sending money to my account, n i really don't want to marry for money. that would not make me happy. Now, am always online and while i was on skype 2 weeks back, i came across this guy Ben. It sounds really crazy but i fell in love with him. he is 38, lives a modest life in US. we kicked of so well, n he wants to marry me. He is a nigerian. In d course of our discussions, i realised he is from a typical polygamous home with all d demerits(my parents would have none of that). he has a son from a girlfriend before he left for US. his sons mother is now married to another man with 4 other kids. the woman's family keeps custody of the boy but he is always there to help when they need him. he calls me on phone eveytime, n his planning to have me meet his family n friends in nigeria. he's also planning to come meet me very soon. But his family background n d fact that he already has a 12yr old son really scares me. i might just have to run away with him because my family will never support my marrying him because of has background n son. Please guys am really confused. If u ask me, my heart goes out to this guy in US because he's much older dan i am n i think i need that kind of man 2 give me some security. am attracted to him, my heart goes out to him, n in 2 weeks, we've said so much about ourselves. i like everything so far about him just that we've not met face to face. Now am really scared because he already has a son who is 12yrs. what do i do? My family thinks that Temi is OK for me, but i don't feel anything for Temi. do i go ahead n marry a guy i don't love? for money? i can't even stand him looking at my eyes let alone make love 2 me. Do i wait till Ben comes from US n see if we get along? shld i marry Ben inspite of his son? Or do i go back 2 my former boyfriend? Will i get enough love n respect from him now that he has gotten a job(he said it was his joblessness that prompted his behaviour to me). Please i need honest advise as this whole thing is causing me sleepless nites. as i was typing this, my mum called my phone. i didn't pick because am not ready for more bashing from her. she is putting so much pressure on me. PLEASE HELP! |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by nkc(m): 3:39pm On Mar 21, 2007 |
my dear,to tell u d truth, d usa guy, will not work in d long term. d temi guy,well u said it, no way. but d nysc guy, i guess u loved him once and it still there, why not water it,if u really love him,make yur family see reasons and marry him. u said 3 guys,said u r d one. no,i disagree, u should have said , i made 3 guys say i am d one. thanks |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by cuteass1(f): 4:45pm On Mar 21, 2007 |
@ top_day I just have to say that my heart goes out to you, your story did pierce through my heart Dearie, one thing you should know is that marriage is not something you would want to run into because your family members are pressuring you, you might want to tell them that your happiness is what matters and their support and that their forcing you into marriage is not helping matters. Now you on the other side, you just have to calm down, you're 28, yes, and so what? your first boyfriend I've always believed in the fact that people can change, and deserve second chances, but what if he becomes jobless again, where's the guarantee that he wouldn't go back to his old self. Someone that changes for the worst in bad times is not worth being partners with because life is not a bed of roses Temi He would have made a great husband, but you don't love him. And love in my dictionary is one of the essential ingredients in a relationship/marriage. Now some people say people can grow to love someone they don't love. That's a 50/50 thing, are you willing to take the risk?? USA guy hmmm, what can is say? Well the fact that he has a 12yr old son has very little to say in the situation. What scares me is the fact that he might not be a serious one, he might just be playing with your heart, he might be very dangerous for all we care, you don't really know this guy, you've not met so there's no guarantee that the chemistry you share with this guy on-line would be there when you meet. And i find his story very scary, you might want to wait till you meet him face to face before making any plans and conclusions Sweetie take your time, "your own" might still be out there because in my humble opinion none of those guys mentioned is meant for you , but i have a feeling that your prince-charming is on his way. Just keep an open mind, you never know what's going to happen the next min. Good luck and may the Lord be with you |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by busygirl(f): 5:47pm On Mar 21, 2007 |
Cute-ass, u've said it all. Girlfriend, take ur tym, follow ur heart, it's ur world nd U RULE! |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by tocheli(f): 10:11pm On Mar 21, 2007 |
@ top day Girly, to tell you thr truth, none of those guys deserve you. You seem desperate why? Am sur youre a fine babe! My dear pls dont jeoperdise your happpiness because of pressure from you family members just bear them. Trust me i know how it feels, i went thru a similar thing. just wait on the lord, the results will be marvelous in you eyes. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Busta(f): 10:35pm On Mar 21, 2007 |
for some reason i'll say the devil u know is better than the angel u don't know. I think ur ex-bf for now is best for u. Moreover u claim u still love him. secondly, temi is out of the question since u feel nothing for him don't go into sth cos of pressure, u'll very much regret it later. Third, the USA guy is a no go area. U've neva met him and u're in love wit him?? trust me gurl, thats not love but mere infatuation cos all u do is daydream bout him. On the other hand, maybe u shld wait till he comes around, and see if the feeling is the same. he seems in a hurry to just get married at 38 and y'all been talking just 2 weeks. Finally, I'll advise that u don't rush things with all 3 men. . maybe ur mr. right is yet to show up! tough luck! |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by BlackMamba(m): 3:49am On Mar 22, 2007 |
Marriage is overrated. But if you must get married to please others, you should at least wait till you meet someone that can give you some measure of happiness while you suffer through the agony of marriage. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by ima1(f): 4:00am On Mar 22, 2007 |
why would you even plan marriage with a guy you can't stand, even for money hun its not worth it, but if you can learn to love him he might be the best candidate for you, the guy in U.S already has a kid he abandoned wats to say he wouldn't do the same to you and your ex is just out of the equation, you shouldn't be with someone that is gonna treat you bad. thats just my opinion |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by SweetT1: 12:36pm On Mar 22, 2007 |
Which ever one of them is good in bed, Sample them all and see which one is slamming in bed. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Bolarge(m): 12:56pm On Mar 22, 2007 |
And now that u're on Nairaland be ready to add @least 5 new guys to ur list of options. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Maneater1(f): 1:04pm On Mar 22, 2007 |
so, you dont like the way the first one treated you you are not attracted to the second one and you've never actually met the third one. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm! i say dont let desperation and pressure drive you to make a life long mistake, unless you dont mind getting divorced eventually. You have not said that u love any. i say God will bring ur husband to you, but never make the mistake of marrying anyone you do not love/ anyone you would not readily give your left eye for. material things come and go, but true happiness lasts forever. Be patient!! and Be Wise!! |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Greycells(m): 1:10pm On Mar 22, 2007 |
@Top_day ur boyfy of 2yrs seems to be d strongest contender still. Were u guys fighting all thru your two years 2gether? If so and u desire peace, move on. Temi, no story, u no love am. u no even get feeling for am Yankee man, wait till you meet him in flesh and blood. The first rule of Internet dating is never make a serious commitment to each other untill you meet offline. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by tinuade001(f): 1:36pm On Mar 22, 2007 |
Babe, i want you to forget about the 3 of them for now. give urself a break, dont let pressure from family drive you into unending problem. marriage is more than dat. the guy from US is out of it. you dont know anything about him. wat of if he's framing wat he's telling you? how are you sure he love you. relax. forget about the 3 of them for now, then pray to God to choose for you. Maybe your prince has not yet arrive. You will surely find him. But provided you can wait on God to lead you. Dont be in an hurry. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by MyPeace(f): 3:06pm On Mar 22, 2007 |
Personally, I see Temi as the right option here. If you dont love him as u calmed u wont have contacted him, and even started planning wedding after 7yrs of breakup. I think you must have started having double feeling after meeting this your online friend. I feel you shd prayer earnestly about Temi, if he is ur husband, God will naturally bring the chemistry need. Am talking from experience, now am enjoying every bit of my relationship. Its always better for a guy to love you more than you do. This is my personally belief as its working well for me. Give him a chance. 1 Like |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by ifylove505(f): 2:06pm On Mar 23, 2007 |
@top day, i really feel u.Personally, i think you should really pray and ask God to direct you. I really know how you feel especially pressures from the family,but you really have to thread cautiously. I think you should forget about your boyfriend for 2yrs.You have rejected him and so you don't have to go back to him.Remember, it's only a dog that goes back to its vomit. For Temi, you don't love him, u don't love.But,before you finally call it quit with him,ask God to make u love him,if truly he belongs to you.If there is still no feelings,then forget him. For the US guy, don't even make the mistake of commiting yourself into a serious relationship with him.Pls forget him. Above all dear,just wait on God prayefully to bring your own husband to you.He did it for me and so he would definitely do it for u. Cheers and wish you all the best. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by 1forall: 4:09pm On Mar 23, 2007 |
topday, at every stage life throws all sorts of situations at us. Dont let this one bog u down, just close your eyes & think into the future and imagine the days that youll be married with kids and would have forgotten this issue youre facing right now. Then you shall have other issues confusing you like 'which school should your kid go?' or 'where should the family go vacationing next summer?' This shall definitely pass so don't give yourself to confusion. Now no one can be perfect but of the three men you mentioned, the only relationship I believe is workable is with your NYSC squeeze. You loved him, still can, and he wants you back. Dont make the same mistake in https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-45504.0.html by marrying temi, you only called him to ease your desperation. Mr USA is also a bad idea except you have at least another year to for courtship in order to know him better, and given the distance constraints and current circumstances, I doubt if both of you can afford the luxury of spending 1 full year around each other. I will never recommend marriage without courtship because its basic. . .I mean you need to know if he snores in his sleep So for me, you have 2 options: your ex-boyfriend, or someone entirely different. The advantages you have with him are- you guys already know each other and have built a level of famliarity and rapport, you know some of his weaknesses (may not handle tough times well), he should appreciate you more now that youve been apart awhile (if he's a regular guy). Dont blame him too much- you had a job and he hadnt all through your 2yr relationship - and he would have been feeling extremely inadequate, mis-percieved and frustrated; and remember, you broke it off. I'd suggest you gave him another 3-6 month try while you keep your eyes open. Finally
Lose the desperation girl, don't let them hustle you o. Marriage is not a sign of 'arrival' at all, its just the genesis of another set of problems to solve. Making such an important decision under desperation only guarantees you'll make mistakes. Forget your heart, its time to use your head. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Ezinwannem: 5:11pm On Mar 23, 2007 |
I think your ex-boyfriend who recently got a job in an oil company is the ideal man for you. I guess he treated you bad cuz of inferiority complex, u know naija mentality, u got a job and he didnt and I guess he was in one way or da other living off u so power struggle came into play. Give him another chance and see how things goes, For the US guy, a no no ooo and the Temi guy, u said it already that u r not attracted 2 him so hez out of da picture. Itz either ur ex or sum1 entirely different. Good luck |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by akindayor(m): 8:11pm On Mar 23, 2007 |
read this it mait b of help Got this email, I have my issues with some of the content but it's got some truth. It is worth reading. Golden rules for finding your life partner by Dov Heller, M.A. A relationships' coach lays out his 5 golden rules for evaluating the prospects of long-term marital success. When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake. Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50 percent, it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr./Ms.Right! If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married,they' ll say: "We're in love." I believe this is the #1 mistake people make when they date. Choosing a life partner should never be based on love. Though this may sound not politically correct, there's a profound truth here. Love is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result of a good marriage. When the other ingredients are right, then the love will come. Let me say it again: You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone. You need a lot more. Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner. QUESTION #1: Do we share a common life purpose? Why is this so important? Let me put it this way: If you're married for 20 or 30 years, that's a long time to live with someone. What do you plan to Do with each other all that time? Travel, eat and jog together? You need to share something deeper and more meaningful. You need a common life purpose. Two things can happen in a marriage. You can grow together, or you can Grow apart. 50 percent of the people out there are growing apart. To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life bottom line-and marry someone who wants the same thing. QUESTION #2: Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person? This question goes to the Core of the quality of your relationship. Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The basis of having good communication is trust - I.e. trust that I won't get "punished" or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings. Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel emotionally safe with the person you plan to marry. QUESTION #3: Is he/she a mensch? A mensch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person. How can you test? Here are some suggestions: A) Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis? (B) Are they serious about improving themselves?( or do they keep on telling you that they'll never change) A teacher of mine defines a good person as "someone who is always striving to be good and do the right thing." So ask about your significant other: What do they do with their time? (c)Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement. There are essentially two types of people in the world: People who are dedicated to personal growth and people who are dedicated to seeking comfort. Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that before walking down the aisle. QUESTION #4: How does he/she treat other people? The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is the Ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure. Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they wrapped up in themselves and self-absorbed? To measure this, think about the following: How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as a waiters, bus boy, taxi driver,etc. How do they treat parents and siblings? Do they have gratitude and appreciation? Do they gossip and speak badly about others? Someone who gossips cannot be someone who loves others.You can be sure that someone who treats others poorly, will eventually treat you poorly as well. QUESTION #5: Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married? Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to"improve" them after they're married. As a colleague of mine puts it, "You can probably expect someone to change after marriage , for the worse!" If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them. In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart. It pays to be as Objective as possible when you are dating, to be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues. Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself in trouble because you didn't do your homework. Another perspective. , There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance. It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere relationships. Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention. Which ones lift and which ones lean? Which ones encourage and which ones discourage? Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill? When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse? Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know, or appreciate you? The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you, the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life. An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye." Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance , pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults aren't really that important. Once you decide to commit to someone, over time their flaws, vulnerabilities, pet-peeves and differences will become more obvious. If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve, you've got to learn how to close one eye and not let every little thing bother you. You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs, values, dreams, weaknesses and strengths. You are two unique individual children of God who have decided to share a life together. Neither one of you are perfect, but are you perfect for each other? Do you bring out the best in each other? Do you compliment and compromise with each other or do you compete, compare and control? What do you bring to the relationship? Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain? You can't take someone to the altar to alter them. You can't make someone love you or make someone stay. If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life" you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Manipulation, control, jealousy, neediness and selfishness are not the ingredients of a thriving, healthy, loving and lasting relationship. Seeking status,sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship. WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG IS: 1. TRUST 2. COMMUNICATION 3. INTIMACY 4. A SENSE OF HUMOR 5. SHARING TASKS 6. SOME GETAWAY TIME WITHOUT BUSINESS OR CHILDREN 7. DAILY EXCHANGES (a meal, shared activity, a hug, a call, a touch, a note) 8. SHARING COMMON GOALS AND INTERESTS 9. GIVING EACH OTHER SPACE TO GROW WITHOUT FEELING INSECURE 10. GIVING EACH OTHER A SENSE OF BELONGING AND ASSURANCES OFCOMMITMENT If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment, withdrawal, abuse, neglect,dishonesty and pain will replace the passion. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by akindayor(m): 8:21pm On Mar 23, 2007 |
now to my own candid advice : a guy who treted u badly cos he aint got a job is nbot a looser but can graduate in one when he looses his present job if u're confident he's not tell him ur fears and make sure he's repentant of it no excuse dou for treating u badli my mom was hurrying my sis to get married i told her to back off cos she might do more harm , than she meant to hurryin her to jump into the river witout the basics ask ur bro to plead on ur behave and make momsie and popsie bak off if dey dont ve d confidence in u dat ur know wat u re doin why den would dey want u married when u aint matured enuf or are dey passin on dier own responsibility to ur would be husband? it's nt fair to push u into married read wat i posted earlier and try to sink it in, okey? |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Nobody: 9:45pm On Mar 23, 2007 |
Now, am always online and while i was on skype 2 weeks back, i came across this guy Ben. It sounds really crazy but i fell in love with him. he is 38, lives a modest life in US. we kicked of so well, n he wants to marry me. He is a nigerian. My advice,strike the US guy off your list as quickly as you can say kpomo! At 38,I'm almost certain he has a baby or babies by an Akata woman. How can you be talking about marriage with someone you've only spoken on the phone with for 2 weeks to the point that you place this stranger in the same league as people you've known for years. He may be a criminal for all you know,anyone can be anything online. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by teemine(f): 2:37pm On Mar 24, 2007 |
Hey girl, u only met someone online 2 wks ago and u talking marriage!!!!!!!! girl u in dreamland. He is a polygamist and told u he has a son from another woman how r u so sure he won/t do d same to u. Wake up girl love wears recommended glasses now. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Ayenfe(f): 10:35pm On Mar 24, 2007 |
My dear falling in love sometimes make one go crazy, think crazy and sometimes do some nasty things. b4 I give u my own piece of advice i will want u to know that i have almost falling into d same case with urs, but thanks to God and pple that surround me that makes me wake up from my slumber. That is y it is good for one to always cheer his/her problem with pple that are close or surround him. 1st that so called guy in US is nothing to write home about, just erase that from ur mind he is just trying to cheat on you. Watch out And for Temi, does he think love is money not at all, your love should not be in exchange of money, cos money is not everything. For that fact u do not have any feeling to this guy, then u shouldn’t go 4 him cos there is no sign of love. Being 28 does not mean anybody should pressure u to get married God can give u the bone of ur bone in is own time. so my dear never be in a hurry to jump into marriage cos i believe u know its a life contract. Lastly give ur totality to God, trust and believe in him, he is the only one that can give u satisfaction, and definately he is going to meet u at the point of ur need. Just be prayerful and always be a good, neat and Virtuous lady/woman. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by watever(f): 11:50pm On Mar 24, 2007 |
teemine: |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by 9jarocks(m): 11:00am On Jun 07, 2011 |
The 3 of them wont work, Just relax, ur man cometh |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by kpolli(m): 3:27pm On Jun 07, 2011 |
even though by now u for don run follow yankee boy, i wud like u to re-read this ur post n see how wicked u sound |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by MMM2(m): 3:38pm On Jun 07, 2011 |
op what make u think dat d guy u have not seen is ur husband? |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by mrkels(m): 2:26pm On May 11, 2012 |
@poster this is 2012, who did you finally get married to? |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Dvampire(m): 5:09pm On May 11, 2012 |
For me, the first guy is it for you. Why do I say so? Certain things you mentioned about him reminds me of ME. Being out of work has a way of bringing out the ugly side in a guy. It creates a sense of being a failure. U begin to feel like others are more progressive than u are. It takes the grace of God, sheer determination and the warm companionship of family and friends to pull through. I suggest you give him a second chance. But do not fail to highlight ur observations in his attitude during part 1. As for the USA guy, I'm not a fan of relationships built over the internet and other electro or telecommunication devices. There is nothing like seeing what a person can do and how he reacts to circumstances or situations, in the flesh. I can paint pictures on the screen of a computer or chat forum that would make me an angel, but is that really who I am? No need talking about the other guy who left his girl for u. Money can't buy love neither is it a substitute for love. Finally, don't be pressured. Marriage is something that should be enjoyed and not endured. It is the only institution where the certificate is issued before lessons are learnt. Don't rush into it out of pressure. If u believe in God, do not fail to pray to him. I know he will make your sun shine in due time. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Dvampire(m): 5:11pm On May 11, 2012 |
For me, the first guy is it for you. Why do I say so? Certain things you mentioned about him reminds me of ME. Being out of work has a way of bringing out the ugly side in a guy. It creates a sense of being a failure. U begin to feel like others are more progressive than u are. It takes the grace of God, sheer determination and the warm companionship of family and friends to pull through. I suggest you give him a second chance. But do not fail to highlight ur observations in his attitude during part 1. As for the USA guy, I'm not a fan of relationships built over the internet and other electro or telecommunication devices. There is nothing like seeing what a person can do and how he reacts to circumstances or situations, in the flesh. I can paint pictures on the screen of a computer or chat forum that would make me an angel, but is that really who I am? No need talking about the other guy who left his girl for u. Money can't buy love neither is it a substitute for love. Finally, don't be pressured. Marriage is something that should be enjoyed and not endured. It is the only institution where the certificate is issued before lessons are learnt. Don't rush into it out of pressure. If u believe in God, do not fail to pray to him. I know he will make your sun shine in due time. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Dvampire(m): 5:12pm On May 11, 2012 |
For me, the first guy is it for you. Why do I say so? Certain things you mentioned about him reminds me of ME. Being out of work has a way of bringing out the ugly side in a guy. It creates a sense of being a failure. U begin to feel like others are more progressive than u are. It takes the grace of God, sheer determination and the warm companionship of family and friends to pull through. I suggest you give him a second chance. But do not fail to highlight ur observations in his attitude during part 1. As for the USA guy, I'm not a fan of relationships built over the internet and other electro or telecommunication devices. There is nothing like seeing what a person can do and how he reacts to circumstances or situations, in the flesh. I can paint pictures on the screen of a computer or chat forum that would make me an angel, but is that really who I am? No need talking about the other guy who left his girl for u. Money can't buy love neither is it a substitute for love. Finally, don't be pressured. Marriage is something that should be enjoyed and not endured. It is the only institution where the certificate is issued before lessons are learnt. Don't rush into it out of pressure. If u believe in God, do not fail to pray to him. I know he will make your sun shine in due time. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Dvampire(m): 5:14pm On May 11, 2012 |
For me, the first guy is it for you. Why do I say so? Certain things you mentioned about him reminds me of ME. Being out of work has a way of bringing out the ugly side in a guy. It creates a sense of being a failure. U begin to feel like others are more progressive than u are. It takes the grace of God, sheer determination and the warm companionship of family and friends to pull through. I suggest you give him a second chance. But do not fail to highlight ur observations in his attitude during part 1. As for the USA guy, I'm not a fan of relationships built over the internet and other electro or telecommunication devices. There is nothing like seeing what a person can do and how he reacts to circumstances or situations, in the flesh. I can paint pictures on the screen of a computer or chat forum that would make me an angel, but is that really who I am? No need talking about the other guy who left his girl for u. Money can't buy love neither is it a substitute for love. Finally, don't be pressured. Marriage is something that should be enjoyed and not endured. It is the only institution where the certificate is issued before lessons are learnt. Don't rush into it out of pressure. If u believe in God, do not fail to pray to him. I know he will make your sun shine in due time. |
Re: 3 Guys Say I Am The One. What Do I Do? by Dvampire(m): 5:14pm On May 11, 2012 |
For me, the first guy is it for you. Why do I say so? Certain things you mentioned about him reminds me of ME. Being out of work has a way of bringing out the ugly side in a guy. It creates a sense of being a failure. U begin to feel like others are more progressive than u are. It takes the grace of God, sheer determination and the warm companionship of family and friends to pull through. I suggest you give him a second chance. But do not fail to highlight ur observations in his attitude during part 1. As for the USA guy, I'm not a fan of relationships built over the internet and other electro or telecommunication devices. There is nothing like seeing what a person can do and how he reacts to circumstances or situations, in the flesh. I can paint pictures on the screen of a computer or chat forum that would make me an angel, but is that really who I am? No need talking about the other guy who left his girl for u. Money can't buy love neither is it a substitute for love. Finally, don't be pressured. Marriage is something that should be enjoyed and not endured. It is the only institution where the certificate is issued before lessons are learnt. Don't rush into it out of pressure. If u believe in God, do not fail to pray to him. I know he will make your sun shine in due time. |
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