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Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? - Family - Nairaland

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Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Nobody: 6:01am On Jun 25, 2018
We keep seeing new headlines of "baby mamas" and "baby kids". And it's easy to glamorize it.

But do we think of the kind of future we're preparing for the next generation?

How will these "baby-mama-kids" cope with life's issues when they're being raised by essentially immature adults looking out for their own pleasure?

What kind of society values would we have in the future? Would we value personal responsibility and self discipline?

This isn't about being preach-y, or someone telling you how to live your life

It's about realizing your life isn't lived in a vacuum: what you do affects the lives of others in ways you may not even know.

Just think: where would you be if your grandfather had died when he was a baby?

You have a responsibility to live the best life you can. There are people who are depending on you for that.

Thank you

34 Likes

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Chubhie: 9:15am On Jun 25, 2018
I'm worried for this age where women are licensed to bare it all in the name of baby showers or whatever name they call it.

25 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by dangotesmummy: 9:28am On Jun 25, 2018
Hmnnnnn
Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by KanwuliaExtra: 10:09am On Jun 25, 2018
Are they complaining? undecided
What solutions are you proposing if YOU see problems.
I don’t, so good luck! kiss

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Nobody: 10:39am On Jun 25, 2018
KanwuliaExtra:
Are they complaining? undecided
What solutions are you proposing if YOU see problems.
I don’t, so good luck! kiss

Thanks for the feedback

It's not clear whether you read through my first post or what you are actually proposing.

I posted that after watching a TV programme showing facilities in some foreign countries where they keep young people from no families.

These young people didn't bring themselves into the world.

They were born by people who felt they had a right to please themselves without considering the consequences of their actions.

By the way, most of the young people I saw on the TV programme were violent and some even suicidal. And it follows: they had no family to learn love and care from, so they naturally HATE themselves and society at large.

As I noted in the first post, personal responsibility and self discipline are key. We will build a better society when we weigh our actions and the impact they could have on other people.

That's one of the good things about platforms like this. We can have fruitful conversations and learn more on how to make better choices.

Thanks again

55 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Chubhie: 11:06am On Jun 25, 2018
alignacademy:


Thanks for the feedback

It's not clear whether you read through my first post or what you are actually proposing.

I posted that after watching a TV programme showing facilities in some foreign countries where they keep young people from no families.

These young people didn't bring themselves into the world.

They were born by people who felt they had a right to please themselves without considering the consequences of their actions.

By the way, most of the young people I saw on the TV programme were violent and some even suicidal. And it follows: they had no family to learn love and care from, so they naturally HATE themselves and society at large.

As I noted in the first post, personal responsibility and self discipline are key. We will build a better society when we weigh our actions and the impact they could have on other people.

That's one of the good things about platforms like this. We can have fruitful conversations and learn more on how to make better choices.

Thanks again
Imagine the keg of gun powder Nigeria is sitting on with the almagiri system? Do we even have such facilities to contain them so as to teach how to be better humans?

So many man madmen and women in suits and ties pervading Lagos that needs to be contained too.

17 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by KanwuliaExtra: 11:11am On Jun 25, 2018
alignacademy:


Thanks for the feedback

It's not clear whether you read through my first post or what you are actually proposing.

I posted that after watching a TV programme showing facilities in some foreign countries where they keep young people from no families.

These young people didn't bring themselves into the world.

They were born by people who felt they had a right to please themselves without considering the consequences of their actions.

By the way, most of the young people I saw on the TV programme were violent and some even suicidal. And it follows: they had no family to learn love and care from, so they naturally HATE themselves and society at large.

As I noted in the first post, personal responsibility and self discipline are key. We will build a better society when we weigh our actions and the impact they could have on other people.

That's one of the good things about platforms like this. We can have fruitful conversations and learn more on how to make better choices.

Thanks again

Like I stated earlier.

You feel there are problems.
Abi you need money to start an NGO? undecided
You keep writing “we” here and “we” there.
I nor join o.

Please, offer solutions. Na you see problems abi?
Thanks. kiss

1 Like

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Nobody: 11:13am On Jun 25, 2018
Chubhie:

Imagine the keg of gun powder Nigeria is sitting on with the almagiri system? Do we even have such facilities to contain them so as to teach how to be better humans?

So man madmen and women in suits and ties pervading Lagos that needs to be contained too.

Thanks for the feedback

I'm not sure of the exact point you're making, though...

Thanks again for joining the conversation...

1 Like

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Nobody: 11:16am On Jun 25, 2018
KanwuliaExtra:


Like I stated earlier.

You feel there are problems.
Abi you need money to start an NGO? undecided
You keep writing “we” here and “we” there.
I nor join o.

Please, offer solutions.
Thanks. kiss

You no join?

To anyone who doesn't see society as a NETWORK of people, nothing I said earlier would make any sense.

By the way, please how would you define what you mean by "solutions"?

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by KanwuliaExtra: 12:00pm On Jun 25, 2018
alignacademy:


Please how would you define what you mean by "solutions"?

There are some situations that are not in YOUR control. How do you deal with matters you can’t control?

You talk about “personal responsibility”!
Well there! How do YOU talk about personal responsibility for situations that are not YOURS? undecided

Do you have the resources or authority to deal with matters that concern others?

If you set up an NGO, and advertise your concerns, goals and preferred solutions to those CONCERNED. . . . you may have some luck.
Is your audience on NL? undecided

Till then, you are just writing for the sake of writing. kiss

No! I nor join o. Not my gaddem BIZZ! kiss

6 Likes

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Nobody: 12:02pm On Jun 25, 2018
KanwuliaExtra:


There are some situations that are not in YOUR control. How do you deal with matters you can’t control?

You talk about “personal responsibility”!
Well there! How do YOU talk about personal responsibility for situations that are not YOURS? undecided

Do you have the resources or authority to deal with matters that concern others?

If you set up an NGO, and advertise your concerns, goals and preferred solutions to those CONCERNED. . . . you may have some luck.
Is your audience on NL? undecided

Till then, you are just writing for the sake of writing. kiss

No! I nor join o. Not my gaddem BIZZ!

Thanks for clarifying your point of view...

4 Likes

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by KanwuliaExtra: 12:11pm On Jun 25, 2018
alignacademy:


Thanks for clarifying your point of view

You are very welcome.


How will these "baby-mama-kids" cope with life's issues when they're being raised by essentially immature adults looking out for their own pleasure?.

Till you can provide YOUR “personal” problem I can help you with, let US ALL go and face our own individual problems first! kiss It is almost July and bills are to be paid ON TIME! kiss

2 Likes

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Chubhie: 1:01pm On Jun 25, 2018
alignacademy:


Thanks for the feedback

I'm not sure of the exact point you're making, though...

Thanks again for joining the conversation...
I mean in a city as complicated as Lagos where it seems people from dysfunctional families congregate, evidenced by the aggressive nature of an average lagosian?You think we have enough facilities to contain them?

1 Like

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Nobody: 1:07pm On Jun 25, 2018
Chubhie:

I mean in a city as complicated as Lagos where it seems people from dysfunctional families congregate, evidenced by the aggressive nature of an average lagosian?You think we have enough facilities to contain them?

Thanks for clarifying

That's an interesting way of looking at the aggressive nature of the average Lagosian!

But instead of talking of facilities, how about looking at preventing the situations that lead to dysfunctional families?

For instance, through sharing ideas, more people can LEARN the impact of their personal choices on society, and DECIDE on wiser choices.

It's not going to be achieved by FORCING anyone. After all, people have the freedom to choose the lives they want.

However people are not free from the consequences of the choices they make. And these consequences usually have ripple effects that affect other people.

Thanks again for your input

4 Likes

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Chubhie: 3:22pm On Jun 25, 2018
alignacademy:


Thanks for clarifying

That's an interesting way of looking at the aggressive nature of the average Lagosian!

But instead of talking of facilities, how about looking at preventing the situations that lead to dysfunctional families?

For instance, through sharing ideas, more people can LEARN the impact of their personal choices on society, and DECIDE on wiser choices.

It's not going to be achieved by FORCING anyone. After all, people have the freedom to choose the lives they want.

However people are not free from the consequences of the choices they make. And these consequences usually have ripple effects that affect other people.

Thanks again for your input
Until we take the evil of poverty out of the people and create an ideal environment for civilized humans, I see no lasting solution.

We must at least provide our people with the basic things of life. food clothing and shelter.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by crackhaus: 7:39pm On Jun 25, 2018
Chubhie:

Until we take the evil of poverty out of the people and create an ideal environment for civilized humans, I see no lasting solution.

We must at least provide our people with the basic things of life. food clothing and shelter.

Lol..a utopian society - such a society does not exist, never has, and probably never will.
And even if it did, it still won't be a solution when taking into account 'The Human Factor'.

3 Likes

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Chubhie: 7:55pm On Jun 25, 2018
crackhaus:

Lol..a utopian society - such a society does not exist, never has, and probably never will.
And even if it did, it still won't be a solution when taking into account 'The Human Factor'.
Are you inferring that it's impossible to eradicate poverty and have access to 24hrs electricity and pipe borne water?

What is utopian about cultivating the basics necessary for improved human experience?

1 Like

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by crackhaus: 8:07pm On Jun 25, 2018
alignacademy:


Thanks for clarifying

That's an interesting way of looking at the aggressive nature of the average Lagosian!

But instead of talking of facilities, how about looking at preventing the situations that lead to dysfunctional families?

For instance, through sharing ideas, more people can LEARN the impact of their personal choices on society, and DECIDE on wiser choices.

It's not going to be achieved by FORCING anyone. After all, people have the freedom to choose the lives they want.

However people are not free from the consequences of the choices they make. And these consequences usually have ripple effects that affect other people.

Thanks again for your input
That's it basically...in fact, I dare say this is the only way to curb the situation.
The problem however is that there is only one medium for sharing ideas that is proven as the most effective, it's the 'Family Unit'.

Just in case you have not come across this book ' The Jewish Phenomenon', try getting a hold of it and you'll understand how having the right foundations in a family unit serve as the most important building block behind an upstanding society.
There's a reason the Jews are considered the most successful and accomplished race of humans in the world despite being the most persecuted, segregated, and smallest by numbers among all other groups.

5 Likes

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by crackhaus: 8:20pm On Jun 25, 2018
Chubhie:

Are you inferring that it's impossible to eradicate poverty and have access to 24hrs electricity and pipe borne water?

What is utopian about cultivating the basics necessary for improved human experience?
Nothing utopian about this, my comment however was a reference to the highlighted segment of your post.

Ideal environment = ideal society = Utopia

And yes, it is impossible to completely eradicate poverty in any society.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Nobody: 10:44pm On Jun 25, 2018
alignacademy:


Thanks for the feedback

It's not clear whether you read through my first post or what you are actually proposing.

I posted that after watching a TV programme showing facilities in some foreign countries where they keep young people from no families.

These young people didn't bring themselves into the world.

They were born by people who felt they had a right to please themselves without considering the consequences of their actions.

By the way, most of the young people I saw on the TV programme were violent and some even suicidal. And it follows: they had no family to learn love and care from, so they naturally HATE themselves and society at large.

As I noted in the first post, personal responsibility and self discipline are key. We will build a better society when we weigh our actions and the impact they could have on other people.

That's one of the good things about platforms like this. We can have fruitful conversations and learn more on how to make better choices.

Thanks again
You have the time to reply some airheads who thinks training a child is just by buying them things and feeding them.



Don't bother wasting your time on such filth,they are not worth it.Perhaps, they are products of dysfunctional family

7 Likes

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Nobody: 5:00am On Jun 26, 2018
crackhaus:

That's it basically...in fact, I dare say this is the only way to curb the situation.
The problem however is that there is only one medium for sharing ideas that is proven as the most effective, it's the 'Family Unit'.

Just in case you have not come across this book ' The Jewish Phenomenon', try getting a hold of it and you'll understand how having the right foundations in a family unit serve as the most important building block behind an upstanding society.
There's a reason the Jews are considered the most successful and accomplished race of humans in the world despite being the most persecuted, segregated, and smallest by numbers among all other groups.

Thank you for your input

I'll certainly look out for the book.

Thanks again

2 Likes

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by maxiuc(m): 4:23pm On Jun 26, 2018
smiley
Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Frankyboy1(m): 4:24pm On Jun 26, 2018
Your head ache!

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by YelloweWest: 4:24pm On Jun 26, 2018
sad
Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Nobody: 4:29pm On Jun 26, 2018
alignacademy:
We keep seeing new headlines of "baby mamas" and "baby kids". And it's easy to glamorize it.

But do we think of the kind of future we're preparing for the next generation?

How will these "baby-mama-kids" cope with life's issues when they're being raised by essentially immature adults looking out for their own pleasure?

What kind of society values would we have in the future? Would we value personal responsibility and self discipline?

This isn't about being preach-y, or someone telling you how to live your life

It's about realizing your life isn't lived in a vacuum: what you do affects the lives of others in ways you may not even know.

Just think: where would you be if your grandfather had died when he was a baby?

You have a responsibility to live the best life you can. There are people who are depending on you for that.

Thank you
trash, which family is not dysfunctional in nigeria whats d diff btw a baby mama and a widow

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by blazer2018: 4:40pm On Jun 26, 2018
Its so sad that baby mamarism and dadirism are d order of the day now...a new study in Sociology


sad

3 Likes

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Herrmes: 4:43pm On Jun 26, 2018
Yes, you should mind your business, if that's what you're asking...
Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by Nobody: 4:43pm On Jun 26, 2018
Who made you a supervisor over how others should raise their children ?

Is it your responsibility to uphold the tenets of marriage for the Gods of the Octopus AI ?

Marriage is not natural, it is not found in nature, it is a human construct designed to keep women as lesser mortals. There is no need for marriage other than companionship and sharing of bills and sometimes love. And love is fleeting mostly. As long as two or more people feel love for each other or one another, they have right to enjoy their sex lives and if children come during this intercourse, they should design a child support template to take care of the child's upkeep.

And if the love wanes away, the partners need to separate and move on with new partners and enjoy their sex lives. This practice of living with a partner you no longer love for ever because of religions, customs and traditions, or even the fear of what people will say should stop henceforth. When the love is over, do not force it, it is natural. Even if the Gods tell you to live together, tell them to come and stay with unhappy person. Do not let the Gods dictate for you to suffer for a lifetime. If it is so easy, let them come down to 3rd Density and deal and see how life is.

No parents should live together in hatred for the sole purpose of raising their children as a uniting factor, the children raise in such atmosphere are worst than those raised in atmosphere of loving single parents.


Marriage is a human construct and is not important in the eternal scheme of things except you meet with your twin flame and decide to work out your karma during this life-time.

I am pro-love, and not pro-marriage and if the Gods do not accept my stance, they should come here and do the time and see how it feels.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by 3Geez(m): 4:44pm On Jun 26, 2018
alignacademy:


You no join?

To anyone who doesn't see society as a NETWORK of people, nothing I said earlier would make any sense.

By the way, please how would you define what you mean by "solutions"?
See if you qualify for what?
Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by MarieSucre(f): 4:44pm On Jun 26, 2018
Chubhie:
I'm worried for this age where women are licensed to bare it all in the name of baby showers or whatever name they call it.


Lol that is your problem? Uncle you don't have any problem jare just looking to kill other people's joy.

1 Like

Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by AZeD1(m): 4:45pm On Jun 26, 2018
What's your definition of a dysfunctional family.

Let start from there.
Re: Should We Really Ignore Dysfunctional Families? by blazer2018: 4:45pm On Jun 26, 2018
Immediately i saw the topic, i knew pple will come for d OP's head... grin

Naturally it does look as if its not d OP's biz...yes its not his biz but it becomes our collective problem and biz when we begin to feel d ripple effect...because when we have too many dysfunctional homes in d society it will surely have domino effect on d country as a whole

The Yorubas will say 'inu ile to n toro, omo ale ibe ni o ti dagba'...meaning 'a house that is peaceful is due to d fact that d bastard in d house have not come of age'... grin

So 4 all d baby mamas and papas condemning him, e binu (make una no vex)... it's 4 our collective good grin

Note:Not all those that come from dysfunctional homes constitute nuisance to d society, but they contribute d highest percentage to it.

7 Likes

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