What's difficult to get married? Do a court wedding, that's all!
If you don't have enough money then delay having children for like a year or two!

val4sure:
Please nairalanders, I need advice on a pressing matter on my neck now, I will try and keep it very short.

There is this lady I have been dating way back during school days, we've known each other for ages, everybody knew us as the perfect couple then, until after our graduation, we passed out together last year from NYSC, after that reality sets in.

I searched for job, nothing was fort coming, I have to change plans and was introduced to an online business which am currently doing, with the business, I have been able to secure a self con apartment as a hustling guy, got it furnished and still doing the same business which has its good and bad times

The issue now is that my girlfriend is not getting any younger, both of us are going to be 28 years old this year and suitors has been flocking around recently to marry her

The issue now is that her family member thinks she is possessed by not accepting any of the suitors that is coming for her, everybody is on her neck to marry, the pressure on her body is just too much that the family members are conducting series of meetings all the time to know if something is wrong with her.

And the reason for her actions is all because of me and am not financially bouyant enough to be able to save her from the pressure by getting married to her now, business just started.

I love the girl so much that I really want to spend the rest of my life with her because she's a rare gem, never seen her type of woman before, but am worried also, no fund for such and I don't think asking her to keep on waiting for me is a good idea base on the pressure on her everyday.

Please nairalanders, am losing it seriously, I have asked so many of my friends for idea, different opinions from different people, please I seriously need advice on this case, what should I do in this situation.

In this kind of scenario,family is always the problem. Your situation almost looked like mine,but mine was faced not only with lack of money but age barrier,and a religion issue.
I'm a Christian and she is Muslim,and we are of the same age. We met in 1999. She graduated in 2008 when I was struggling to run a part time studies in yabatech.
Then I was broke like church rat but she stood by me with the help of her mum. While I was struggling to have OND cert,she was somewhere in Jigawa serving. I am writing all these to let you know that if what she feels for is genuine and you being a responsible person she will stand by you no matter how ugly the situation is.
Against all odds,we got married in 2012. We are blessed with two lovely boys. As at December last year the marriage was 6yrs old.

Op I think you have got all the advice you need. I was in a similar situation, but I had to let go. I am still filled with regrets.


If you are kind enough, can you introduce me to your sorta business. I am looking for better ways to make money.

emerged01:


In this kind of scenario,family is always the problem. Your situation almost looked like mine,but mine was faced not only with lack of money but age barrier,and a religion issue.
I'm a Christian and she is Muslim,and we are of the same age. We met in 1999. She graduated in 2008 when I was struggling to run a part time studies in yabatech.
Then I was broke like church rat but she stood by me with the help of her mum. While I was struggling to have OND cert,she was somewhere in Jigawa serving. I am writing all these to let you know that if what she feels for is genuine and you being a responsible person she will stand by you no matter how ugly the situation is.
Against all odds,we got married in 2012. We are blessed with two lovely boys. As at December last year the marriage was 6yrs old.

Wow.. Good to hear she didn't give up on you

Life.
Even when there is money, issues that prevents marriage still happen.

Money. Just money seems to be your only problem.
Work hard and double your hustle.

op.

I know know u feel. I really know.

but u know what, u are not wicked but the guys that ask u to free the girl are telling u the truth.

calm down,

the ball is in her court.

she is telling u she has 3 suitors and so.

does she want u to kill them.

Sir the girl like u, she does not love u.(I think)

if she love u, I mean real love, she will be the one telling u what to do(because she knows her people very well)....in fact she will suggest pregnancy as a LAST RESORT...pls do not suggest this to her. if it does not come from her u are imposing ur will n u will get it wrong.

if she tell her pips that she will get kids for u if they can not wait, they will be the ones calling u.

so sir, whenever she bring any story to u just keep mum (silent and say not a word) and pretend (and know)u have nothing to loose by her going.

let her make her decision.


let me tell u a truth. my quote.

"love is a decision at the height of it"

if u loose her, the way u will run your businesses eh, people will think u are mad , u are likely to succeed.
take a breath, pray, cry if u have to,

but let her make her decision.

best of luck Sir

Greenrevolt:
Op I think you have got all the advice you need. I was in a similar situation, but I had to let go. I am still filled with regrets.


If you are kind enough, can you introduce me to your sorta business. I am looking for better ways to make money.

Am into importation of goods, if you want more details about the business you can contact me with the number on my moniker.

Mightyraw:
Which online bussines bro

I need money too

Am an internet marketer, primarily into importation of goods.

val4sure:

Am an internet marketer, primarily into importation of goods.

Can I contact you

I do a little of that too

Mightyraw:

Can I contact you

I do a little of that too

No problem, you can

Mikaelson21:
Take a deep breath and relax...
Yes she is getting older, it's only normal family and external pressure will be all over her case, sadly in this part of the world that's what they do PRESSURE but she is the one who is gon stay in the marriage, obviously she loves you, I advice you both go and see the family, relax, before you start shouting you don't have the cash, this way by seeing the family together, she will introduce you as her fiancee, that's if the family hasn't know. Who you are all this while, so you both go, she introduce you, this way, it put a little break on the pressure nonsense, and stop the family from saying some so wrong with her, but that introduction, It could buy you a little more time, maybe let's say 6 months, I pray for you both sake, before then, let's business boom and God elevate you...
She too shouldn't be idle,let her find something doing, and also talk to God in prayers, I believe say na once person story dey change... Peace ✌

Abstract:
The bolded suggests that in other climes particularly developed Countries, people are pressurized to get educated, invent things and start a business. So we have students loan , feeder programs(for intending inventors) and a good system of entrepreneurial loans. At the end of the day 3 out of 10 American and Europeans get married to their "high school Sweethearts".
Unfortunately , here where pressure is put on people to marry we do not have couple loans. I intend to start a couple loan business but failure to pay back with interest when due will result in castration of the groom or hot fücking of the bride.

The cause of your Misery:
First of all I commend you for being steadily delusional and imaginary these past years. What the fück is "I'm into online business". These businesses take a long time to pay. Imagine what will happen if you lost your laptop today. Just imagine. You should have started working in your Final year in the University and even NYSC if you were real about marrying her understanding the country you live in . Well I forgive you and because I have forgiven you for unintentionally toying with that girl's emotion , you will succeed in life.

The way forward:
Do not leave her or make her leave. Marriage is an euphoria(short term happiness) when you become richer and remain still handsome than the much older man she may marry if you leave her , she will regret and you will regret. Those advising you to leave still regret deep inside they left.

Follow these steps and see things work out for you:
1. Bring her home and show her this piece of trash I'm typing.
2. Cry with her and assure her you will live with her forever.
20th February - 31st March
3. If you do not have up to 80,000 naira at the moment plead with your family and friends , add your life savings and get the 80,000 naira on 31st of March.
4. Impregnate her on 31st of March after you've had the best sex of a lifetime.
5. Buy half bags of rice, beans,salt, big tins of milk and milo 2 each, two cartons of indomie and 2 crates of egg. (The idea is for these things to finish during her the beginning of her last trimester)
6. Give her the laptop and teach her how to do your yeye online business.
7. Be a man and ready to be dirty while hustling legally. Remember you will be working for love, your woman and your baby.

1st April to 10th January 2020
8. Leave her with the remaining money from the 80,000 probably 35,000 naira after you bought those food items above.
9. Tell her you are leaving so you can be a responsible father and husband ,you will visit her during weekends .
10. Look for construction sites and start carrying blocks and other materials, you can learn how to mix cement for the main builder. Sometimes you may clear grasses and do menial cleaning for people and take a night shift cleaning dead bodies at a mortuary in the evening. Or you may just organise for Keke napep before April 1st and start riding.

11. If you work hard you will have more than 5000 naira daily but save at least 5000 naira daily. If you save 5000 naira daily : 5000*300 = 1,550,000 . Even if its not organised 3000 sometimes ,4000 sometimes ,5000,6000,7000 sometimes before your child is born you will have more than one million, two hundred thousand.
12. During the last 3 months of the pregnancy , your girl must return to her mother for proper care because she is a first timer. Believe me , there is nothing greater than a mother's love.
13. Don't save your money anywhere, go to the bank on Tuesdays and Wednesdays between 9-10 am. To keep your weekly savings. There are usually no queues during that time no matter what.
14. After work each day during that period, find churches that do tarry night and sleep. This will help you wake up the next day by 5am, give you connection to people who believe you are trustworthy and give you sense of hope and belonging because there you will meet people worse than you as Dangotes and Otedolas do not go to such places and no one will steal your keke tyre or parts or whole(if you choose the keke path) if you park inside the the church environment.

15. Watch and pray with her during the weekends you meet her. Not because prayers work, if they worked you wouldn't be here in the first place. They always prayed to be forever with their first love. But pray with her to give her hope because when you thank God for what you are beginning to have she will hear and develop a sense of security. When you pray for health and mercy she will know about what you pass through and know you are a real man.

16. When she gives birth at least 1.2 million + money from the online business she handled is ready. You will pay her hospital bills, rent a 2 bed room flat with toilet. Give her mother a good wrapper and 70,000 naira. Thank her mother for being there for you. Her mother will love and forgive you as an inlaw especially with a bigger apartment you have rented. Give her father an expensive drink and kneel down in submission to him, he is a man and he will understand. Give your wife money to buy new clothes and take care of herself and the baby and give her 200,000 to save for the babies school or the future. Keep 100000 for yourself and begin the circle all over till December 2020. The profit gotten will be for an investment.

At the end of this long exercise, you will understand 3 things.
(1) How to be a loving father and husband.
(2) Life is not easy , if it gives up on you ,never give up on it. Work hard and get what you want.
(3). Get into the dirt and do something menial but legal. It will give you more money than some online jobs.

Do not drink alcohol so you will not be poisoned, do not smoke or inject drugs so you will not be wayward and do not gamble so you will not be suicidal.

Man is born free but everywhere he is in chains.

Freehuman,(2019)

[quote author=val4sure post=75894919]
No problem, you can [/quote
OK 08160745171
You can drop yours

[quote author=Mightyraw post=75911658][/quote]
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