Let's not lose the subject matter
We are talking of engagement not just a road side relationship that failed.

Pusyiter:
Let's not lose the subject matter We are talking of engagement not just a road side relationship that failed.

Do you have any?

LordKO:
Yes. And she's one of the most beautiful, intelligent and benevolent (at least towards me) women in the world - she was submissive with a genuine intention to make it work out between us. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to fall in love with her - even though I love her - despite trying my utmost. She wasn't perfect, just as no human being is, and her personal imperfection wasn't the main reason I was unable to fall in love with her.

Walking out of her life, despite all her pleas and considering the fact that we didn't quarrel even for a day, was one of the hardest decisions I've ever taken in life, but I couldn't afford wasting her time and continually raising her hope that I may succeed in falling in love with her.

Love is a mystery.

So therevare still rich and good women. Please connect me to her I need quality woman like her. I only meet hungry women as the full for this nairaland.

Antibrutus pocohantas na true say somebody break ihm engagement with anoda woman in oda to marry you?

some women juju dey stronger dan devil himself. Antibrutus who be your juju man?

NwanyiAwkaetiti:
So u needed someone to control you? OK I've picked something from this ur comment

Yes, I really needed someone to help curb my excesses then, cos I was on a spiralling jamboree of fun fun and more fun. No limits. Would come back home every night by 3am dead drunk and flying high. If she wasn't with me she would request for suya and a drink. Shikena! What kind of marriage would that have been? My wife changed me, to the new responsible me.
No late nights no excess drinking, 2 bottles max, and not on a daily basis. My wife also taught me how to control my finances, not that one that didn't care how the money was spent.

Biglittlelois:
Nope, never been engaged, personally don't like the ring thing before one becomes lord of the ring.

hmmm have u Eva be in love

MisterMan123456:


Yes, I really needed someone to help curb my excesses then, cos I was on a spiralling jamboree of fun fun and more fun. No limits. Would come back home every night by 3am dead drunk and flying high. If she wasn't with me she would request for suya and a drink. Shikena! What kind of marriage would that have been? My wife changed me, to the new responsible me.
No late nights no excess drinking, 2 bottles max, and not on a daily basis. My wife also taught me how to control my finances, not that one that didn't care how the money was spent.

Yea I understand you. I pray she meets someone who likes her for who she is.

LordKO:
Yes. And she's one of the most beautiful, intelligent and benevolent (at least towards me) women in the world - she was submissive with a genuine intention to make it work out between us. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to fall in love with her - even though I love her - despite trying my utmost. She wasn't perfect, just as no human being is, and her personal imperfection wasn't the main reason I was unable to fall in love with her.

Walking out of her life, despite all her pleas and considering the fact that we didn't quarrel even for a day, is one of the hardest decisions I've ever taken in life, but I couldn't afford wasting her time and continually raising her hope that I may succeed in falling in love with her.

Love is a mystery.

Man! Son of a bitch. You're courageous.

Guest007:
My first 'love'

It was a weird relationship because it wasn't an intimate relationship (1st Base tings, and nothing else) But it was the real deal for me. We planned everything down to the detail, we spent 24hrs marathon talking session

This went on from age 14/15 until I was 21...

when I was 19, we tried to go all the way, and when he reached my girls, with kisses, I nearly threw up in my mouth... It was shocking for me, and I didn't have the mouth to tell him the truth.

Few weeks later... He took me to a local funfair, and he spoilt me rotten, everything I wanted and somethings were a surprise. We stayed out until 4am... (I remember him in a short sleeve top, while I wore his oversized jacket) His blood was hot though
We spent the rest of the night on the Broadway, and when everything closed we went back to the funfair (Park) we had a picnic under the stars (drinks, snacks, and his cigarettes, and we cuddle and right there as I lay on his chest, listening to his heart beat, (I'd taken my headscarf off, and shawl, and used it as cove) He popped the question, and I accepted. Then I ghost him for 3/4 years. Oh, and I lost the ring, and I joined bad gang

Wow. You write well.

MisterMan123456:
Travelled down meet my ex's parents during a Christmas break, spent 3 days in their home, told em I wanted to marry their daughter, they were happy and accepted me, she took me round her uncles and aunts to get me introduced as her fiance, didn't give her a ring though. But in January I realized she wasn't the one for me. She wasn't ambitious, she had no plan set out for herself for the future, nothing!
She wasn't just a wife material, but good girlfriend material, the sex was da bomb!
she never complained about my excesses, I was free to live a reckless life and she never complained.
At that point I realized we will just end up in a wrecked marriage. So I ran........ I just tuned out, told her though, but she couldn't understand me, she felt I was happy living my life always high, late nights, clubbing, drugging etc.
Been married for over a decade, sadly she isnt. My wife controls my excesses 100%. I'm a more focused human being now.

Permit me to say, you're but a wayward fellow.

Not engaged but I would like to seek clarity.

I was in a pseudo-relationship once, we never finalised on the nature of our relationship but I seemed to love him senseless and felt whatever connection we had was crazy. I felt secure and insecure at the same time..in the 3rd year it came crashing like a pack of cards and I blamed it on our inability to truly define what we meant to one another. It still hurts but I had to wonder for the longest time if I was to blame for the 'inconclusive' way we panned out.

Did it all happen in my head?

candlewax:


If you meet a deranged person, he or she is usually the first to call you mad. Why? The fella has been deranged for a long time that madness becomes a language.

I understand you plight better now. I understand why you have to dump someone after proposing, you are not just evil, you come from a family with history of Mad Men, from your forebears down to your miserable father, let me point out that you embrassing the girl isn't ordinary, what befell your ancestors has finally caught up with you.

You'd call off everything in your life and think you have a noble reason till you find yourself walking aimlessly in the markets as your ancestors and father did. I could have helped but it's in the gene..

clap back of the year

NwanyiAwkaetiti:
So u needed someone to control you? OK I've picked something from this ur comment

You must be wondering, what exactly do men want

Guest007:


I'm shocked at the double standards . I 'waisted' a guy's time for nearly a decade, and you get called evil but I'm not because he is a man and he has a decade to 'waist'

Lol. Don't mind some of these people. The concerned lady understands better, yet some bumpkins are here yapping trash. Even up to this very moment, she still has an unrestricted access to one of my bank cards, and we see and communicate almost every day. She knows that in me she has someone who can stand for her in all conditions, except having her as a wife.

Perhaps, because I said among her other good attributes she was benevolent to me, they thought it was about money. lol. Yes, she has money in abundance, but I neither for one day exploit her nor set out to eat from her. So, if truly I was evil and opportunistic she wouldn't have wished to have me remain permanently in her life.

Besides, I neither wasted her time nor did she. We started in a position of mutual convenience and it was spontaneous.

kense88:
clap back of the year

Lol. That can only be so for a mentally parochial entity like you. Bumpkin.

UyaiIncomparabl:


Now tell me, why couldn't you just love her?

Some of us, despite being irreligious, have gift of divination and clairvoyance which usually make it possible for us to see what the future holds for us and those around and dear to us. So, going against the rule even after personally receiving several warnings always end up in a catastrophic manner no matter how sweet the present is. One who's attuned with his or her subconscious shouldn't be caught making some needles costly mistakes.

kense88:
You must be wondering, what exactly do men want

Like they know...

AntiBrutus:


Like they know...

Milady, believe you me, some of us do. But going against one's subconscious isn't palatable. Oh, I forgot, you're neither religious nor spiritual. Lol. For more information on how to be attuned with your subconscious, dial. . .

LordKO:


Milady, believe you me, some of us do. But going against one's subconscious isn't palatable. Oh, I forgot, you're neither religious nor spiritual. Lol. For more information on how to be attuned with your subconscious, dial. . .

Yea, I understand that bit and I think you took the best decision. I made that post because; I have seen guys here say no man ever wants a "controlling" woman. But then, I have met men who love their women assertive, albeit with reverence.

Lol, you remember correctly.
I am not into all that mumbo jumbo

LordKO:


Lol. Don't mind some of these people. The concerned lady understands better, yet some bumpkins are here yapping trash. Even up to this very moment, she still has an unrestricted access to one of my bank cards, and we see and communicate almost every day. She knows that in me she has someone who can stand for her in all conditions, except having her as a wife.

Perhaps, because I said among her other good attributes she was benevolent to me, they thought it was about money. lol. Yes, she has money in abundance, but I neither for one day exploit her nor set out to eat from her. So, if truly I was evil and opportunistic she wouldn't have wished to have me remain permanently in her life.

Besides, I neither wasted her time nor did she. We started in a position of mutual convenience and it was spontaneous.

I just have to probe further because you and her have unrestricted access to each other going by the bank cards and all, I know this type of relationship all too well, how do you think she feels/will feel when you are in a serious relationship? Do not say she is/will be good with it cos she says and shows that, she may be crying in her closet knowing you are able to fall in love with someone else other than her.......

Biglittlelois:



I just have to probe further because you and her have unrestricted access to each other going by the bank cards and all, I know this type of relationship all too well, how do you think she feels/will feel when you are in a serious relationship? Do not say she is/will be good with it cos she says and shows that, she may be crying in her closet knowing you are able to fall in love with someone else other than her.......

She's both altruistic and conscientious - a true independent/strong-minded woman - so I know what she can do and what she can't do at any given time either in my presence or absence.

LordKO:


She's both altruistic and conscientious - a true independent/strong-minded woman - so I know what she can do and what she can't do at any given time either in my presence or absence.

Smh!!! What a complex relationship.

Freehuman:


Permit me to say, you're but a wayward fellow.

I used to be a very wayward fellow for so many years till I met my wife. I've done things I'm not proud of. But all that's in the past now. Thanks to making the right choice for a wife.

MisterMan123456:


I used to be a very wayward fellow for so many years till I met my wife. I've done things I'm not proud of. But all that's in the past now. Thanks to making the right choice for a wife.

We all need checks and balances

AntiBrutus:

why he address you with honour "Milady"? i am curious to know because i know that men for the forum not like you much

Bossjakande:
hmmm have u Eva be in love

Of course, I'm not rigid.

Biglittlelois:



Of course, I'm not rigid.

That means you are ready to mingle, if yes let me help connect you to a destiny changer.

LordKO:



Lol. That can only be so for a mentally parochial entity like you. Bumpkin.

Yet my parochial mentality can spot the fact that your getting schooled in art of trash talk. Stop been a sour loser and say something better dickhead.

Theglobalman:


So therevare still rich and good women. Please connect me to her I need quality woman like her. I only meet hungry women as the full for this nairaland.

Maybe you should stop looking for women on Nairaland for a change.

LordKO:



Lol. That can only be so for a mentally parochial entity like you. Bumpkin.

LordKO, I may not be entirely familiar with the word true man but without fail I believe you are one. Some asked why couldn't you just fall in love with her? Haha like you could force it, even if you could would it last till forever? Some asked you why did you propose knowing how you feel? Well I doubt I can imagine what your answer would be haha...and then we have the bumpkins...Funny dudes.

The fact that you did not deceive such a genuine and elegant woman shows your upright standing.
I support the choice you made though I don't reckon you need my support. To those that oppose your decision I wonder if deceiving her feels like the right choice to them. Except one is placed in such a situation they'd probably never understand how hard such a decision is and most would make the wrong one.

I reckon the reason why I can relate to you is because I've found myself in such a situation albeit down-scaled.
I had to question myself: Should I just be with her out of pity and not break her heart despite leading her on, which would still inevitably break her at some point or should I just tell her how I feel?
Well I did, I told her I can give her everything else be it a support, a shoulder to lean on or just the fact that there's someone who'd always care 100 for her but not a relationship. Well, it wasn't up to a proposal so I don't suppose I have the right to share the actual story.

Way to go man...I respect you.

Biglittlelois:


Of course, I'm not rigid.

hmmm why did u guys brake up.