Please help save my marriage and guide me into cutting my coat acording to my size.

I recently got made redundant and now have to rely on my Hubby's £1,200 income after tax to survive with 2 kids under the age of 5. I was working for a private company, hence the severance pay i received is nothing to write home about, and will barely last into the new year. I have managed to procure a two hours a day playground assistant at my son's nursery because i cannot sit at home twiddling my thumb and doing nothing, or else i would die of boredom. I manage to bring in an extra £250 a month as a result of this, taking our total take home to £1450.

We have been searching for jobs outside London for around two years, to take advantage of the cheaper rent to no avail, but we are just grateful to God for the jobs we have in London. Because of this, our rent on our ONE bedroom apartment in East London which we had to downgrade into, one of the cheapest area comes to £780 per month, and by the time you factor in money for travelcard, food, bills, clothing for the children, we have nothing left to pay tithe, socialise or save. So we don't go out, can't afford to entertain and don't have any savings for now. Not being able to pay tithe is not mice, but that 10% is a chunk of our income.

The reason i have come to this nairaland community is to seek help to make our little income go further. For example, one of my friend came over to see me and she exclaimed how things where expensive when i had to pay £1 for 3 plantain and £4 for a tuber of yam. She lives in Wembley in Northwest London and they get 7 plantain for £1, and the same yam would cost £2.50. Now this might seem a paltry amount to some people, but when you consider that we are paying over double for the same quantity of food, it makes sense to sit up and pay attention. Another friend told me she does her hair in Dalston for £25, and i have been doing mine for £45 thinking i was getting a bargain.

So please my fellow Brothers and Sisters, please come to the rescue of me nd my family and kindly point us in directions we can get goods and services on the cheap. We have had to discontinue our Sky satellite tv package, made our phone incoming only, can't afford to buy clothes for ourselves for now, except the kids, WE WILL APPRECIATE AND TAKE ON BOARD ALL INPUT, THANKS EVERYONE. AND I AM SURE OTHERS WOULD ALSO BE ABLE TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THIS KIND GESTURES TOO. GOD BLESS YOU ALL.

please go on benefit.

@ Mz Frugal

I really really hope you get useful contributions here, this topic will help alot of pple in similar situation.

I think getting a house outside london will help alot, where the rent will be in the region of £500.

If you have papers, are you telling me you can't find ANY call centre, customer care, sales advisor, part time admin e.t.c e.tc jobs
I'm sure you'd have some sort of transferrable skills from your old job. . . ?

One advice I can give you is to find someone who'd rent out their council flat in London to you which is about £500 a month, it's not advertised, but an underground stuff. . ask Nigerians around.

The worst thing is that peeps at home won't understand. They will keep calling to ask for a $1500 HD TV. Do they even have HD channels in Nigeria?
Nonsense. Waiting for one mothersucker to call me and i will make sure i curse his Great Grand parents out

oyewolejos:

The worst thing is that peeps at home won't understand. They will keep calling to ask for a $1500 HD TV. Do they even have HD channels in Nigeria?
Nonsense. Waiting for one mothersucker to call me and i will make sure i curse his Great Grand parents out

Mz Frugal:

Please help save my marriage and guide me into cutting my coat acording to my size.

I recently got made redundant and now have to rely on my Hubby's £1,200 income after tax to survive with 2 kids under the age of 5. I was working for a private company, hence the severance pay i received is nothing to write home about, and will barely last into the new year. I have managed to procure a two hours a day playground assistant at my son's nursery because i cannot sit at home twiddling my thumb and doing nothing, or else i would die of boredom. I manage to bring in an extra £250 a month as a result of this, taking our total take home to £1450.

We have been searching for jobs outside London for around two years, to take advantage of the cheaper rent to no avail, but we are just grateful to God for the jobs we have in London. Because of this, our rent on our ONE bedroom apartment in East London which we had to downgrade into, one of the cheapest area comes to £780 per month, and by the time you factor in money for travelcard, food, bills, clothing for the children, we have nothing left to pay tithe, socialise or save. So we don't go out, can't afford to entertain and don't have any savings for now. Not being able to pay tithe is not mice, but that 10% is a chunk of our income.

The reason i have come to this nairaland community is to seek help to make our little income go further. For example, one of my friend came over to see me and she exclaimed how things where expensive when i had to pay £1 for 3 plantain and £4 for a tuber of yam. She lives in Wembley in Northwest London and they get 7 plantain for £1, and the same yam would cost £2.50. Now this might seem a paltry amount to some people, but when you consider that we are paying over double for the same quantity of food, it makes sense to sit up and pay attention. Another friend told me she does her hair in Dalston for £25, and i have been doing mine for £45 thinking i was getting a bargain.

So please my fellow Brothers and Sisters, please come to the rescue of me nd my family and kindly point us in directions we can get goods and services on the cheap. We have had to discontinue our Sky satellite tv package, made our phone incoming only, can't afford to buy clothes for ourselves for now, except the kids, WE WILL APPRECIATE AND TAKE ON BOARD ALL INPUT, THANKS EVERYONE. AND I AM SURE OTHERS WOULD ALSO BE ABLE TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THIS KIND GESTURES TOO. GOD BLESS YOU ALL.

   This is touching. Honestly, your write-up suggests that you're not a dum someone, so i really trust that you can get off this situation as long as you are not too selective with jobs: except of course, you don't have the right documents to work in the UK.

justwise:

@ Mz Frugal

I really really hope you get useful contributions here, this topic will help alot of pple in similar situation.

I think getting a house outside london will help alot, where the rent will be in the region of £500.

Mz Frugal (ignore my user id name)

Have you registered on the NHS website.

They have many admin/clerical vacancies. They are normally very flexible with regards to working hours.

The  NHS always do a CRB check but the cost will always be met by them,this means you will avoid paying the charges some agencies ask job applicants to fork out for .

'

try shopping in lidl instead of tescos

@poster

I wish I can give you an advise but like browncocos said, it will be hard to give any meaningful suggestion since you live in UK. But I asked the lord to keep you and your family save. Don't worry, something good is coming on your way in almighty name (Amen).

browncocos gives some good ideas you should consider following and it will help alot.


All the best to you and your family.

@Mz Frugal. If your able to go to the supermarket just before closing time, or even an hour or 2 before said, check the reduction counters, they ALWAYS reduce perishable items by more than 75%. Only buy what can be frozen, for example meat and poultry.

madlady:

Mz Frugal (ignore my user id name)

Have you registered on the NHS website.

They have many admin/clerical vacancies. They are normally very flexible with regards to working hours.

The NHS always do a CRB check but the cost will always be met by them,this means you will avoid paying the charges some agencies ask job applicants to fork out for .

Not when she ain't gonna be dealing with kids or vulnerable people.

@OP
What skills/qualifications do you have?

Are you collecting child benefit for the two kids 'cos that's certainly going to be >£100

Why is your 1 bed flat that expensive? A private one bed flat around zone 5-6 shouldn't be more than £550 so you need to have another look at that.

You can get help with working/child tax credit as both of you don't earn above the earning threshold.

Lastly, below is a link to the general tips to saving money

http://www.thisismoney.co.uk/50-ways

If you can organise alternative child care/school arrangements for your kids, the best option is to move into a cheaper apartment. . . .that will likely cause the most significant reduction in your rent.

Dunno much about buying kids clothing and the like, but I do know Asda did a baby/toddler event a few weeks ago with lots of discounted prices - you can still get a few items off their website if you need those kind of things.

I think you should explore the opportunity of getting a job as advised above.

Regarding the cheaper food at Wembley, always factor in transportation costs before buying from another location. . . .it might make all the difference.

Wish you all the best. . . . don't give up and I'm sure things will improve.

maybe not the enhanced disclosure. I am yet to hear of an applicant who's not had one, maintance and cleaning staff also need one.

I could be wrong so I bow to your greater knowledge.

Off to a meeting so brb to answer u

I would advise you to register with lots of agencies around your area and online like jobserve, jobsite and reed. It also depends on the job you want to do or qualification and experience. Concerning food products and hair, you can buy travel rail card to cover your cost for a day to make ur hair as well as shop for food stuffs in a cheap area and do some other things. It all about making the right plan.

Check out this website for useful tips from people in similar situations, www.moneysavingexpert.co.uk

its uk based so you would get things like the cheapest supermarkets to shop at, best deals for childrens clothing, even

suggestions on how to boost your income. And many many more!

Good Luck!

BTW theres also a benefit calculating tool on the website, you may be entitled to council tax and housing benefits.

@ poster

My prayers are with you, I know it's not easy at the moment.  Since you are already in a school environment, what about looking if they have an opening for a Teaching Assistant?  I'm betting that they would have already done a background check on you before allowing you near the kids.

Your rent is extremely high for a one bed, like some suggested, ask about renting a council place instead.  The area may not be up to standard, but just see it as a stop gap for now.  Your kids are still young, so transferring nursery/schools may not be a big deal for them - kids adjust fast.

Shopping in the evening is also another good idea - loads of offers.  Is your hubby opposed to eating some oyinbo food from time to time?  Iceland has some good offers on frozen foods.  You could then make our food 2x monthly for instance.

Your hair - can you braid? or at least do some single plaits on yourself?  if so, I would suggest getting yourself a wig or half wig, and ride it out.

All the best babe.

I feel your pains, but is coming home never an option?

Have you considered moving out of London? London is expensive, in other cities like Leeds, Manchester, Sheffield, you can get a two-bed HOUSE for £400, or even cheaper.
Jobs down there are also available.

@Poster,

I can feel your situation at this time in the UK. You are not alone. You are a true innovative wife.

1. When you shop at TESCO and Morrisons, look for VALUE range products

2. When you shop at Sainburys, look for BASICS range products

3. Be ready to shop around for basic food stuffs

4. Shop for vegetables and fruits in Saturday and Sunday street markets e.g. Dalston Kingsland street market, East Street market off Old Kent Road, Lewisham Centre street market, Peckham Pulse farmers market near Peckham Library on Sundays, etc.

5. Shop for clothes at Primark

6. If you buy petrol or diesel, avoid BP and Texaco filling stations because their prices are always more expensive than any others.

7. At your spare time, read -  http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/

@Poster,

You can buy wholesale (bulk) of african food stuffs at New Spitalfields Market, Sherrin Road, Leyton, London E10 5SQ in the morning (best time is from 4:00am to 7:00am). Share with your friends.
http://www.wholesalefruitvegetableflowers.co.uk/

For Example:
A box of yam is between £18 and £22, at least 8 tubers of yam per box. Its better than buying 1 tuber of yam for £4.

samtoye:

I feel your pains, but is coming home never an option?

This is the question I keep asking my friends here in the UK.

I came to the UK to do a top-up (final year) Bachelor degree course, which I have now completed. Since I completed my exams 3 months ago, I haven't been able to get a job (Security [I've got the SIA badge], Cleaning, Warehouse Picker etc etc), and this has to do with the fact that I'm on a student visa.

Whenever I mention to my friends that I intend going back to naija, they look at me as if I'm mad, meanwhile, they've all graduated at least 1-2years ago, and the jobs they have cannot be listed on their CVs!. Before I came here for my top-up, I was working in a small Business Consultancy in GRA Ikeja (without a B.Sc) and I was earning 100K (approx 400pounds). The money wasn't so fantastic, but my standard of living was a lot better than it currently is in London. I didn't have to pay rent, worry about feeding etc etc.

I don't believe living abroad is a do-or-die matter, especially as most people are actually suffering here. Moreover, naija is not the worst place on earth, so I don't see any reason why we can't go back home when living abroad turns into a living hell.

one tip will be learn to do your own hair. if you are not socializing that makes things even easier cos you can experiment at home, till u perfect your chosen style ( You tube has alot of self help videos ) . The most advisable way will be to start braiding your hair and go natural . That way you can always just braid and corn row without using chemicals that will damage your hair over time if not done by a professional . Friends who are handing with hair styles may also help ,you can barter their service for a few days baby sitting their kids .

An extreme choice will be to cut your hair . please consult husband first

Mz Frugal:

Please help save my marriage and guide me into cutting my coat acording to my size.

The reason i have come to this nairaland community is to seek help to make our little income go further. For example,  one of my friend came over to see me and she exclaimed how things where expensive when i had to pay £1 for 3 plantain and £4 for a tuber of yam. She lives in Wembley in Northwest London and they get 7 plantain for £1, and the same yam would cost £2.50. Now this might seem a paltry amount to some people, but when you consider that we are paying over double for the same quantity of food, it makes sense to sit up and pay attention. Another friend told me she does her hair in Dalston for £25, and i have been doing mine for £45 thinking i was getting a bargain.

I live in North-West London (Colindale) and I'm quite surprised to learn that one can get 7 plantains for 1pound in Wembley!. I've been to different stores and markets around here (Colindale, Hendon, Burnt Oak, Edgware), and the standard price for plantain is 3 for 1pound, I'll check out the market at Wembley ASAP.

Ghurka:

This is the question I keep asking my friends here in the UK.

I came to the UK to do a top-up (final year) Bachelor degree course, which I have now completed. Since I completed my exams 3 months ago, I haven't been able to get a job (Security [I've got the SIA badge], Cleaning, Warehouse Picker etc etc), and this has to do with the fact that I'm on a student visa.

Whenever I mention to my friends that I intend going back to naija, they look at me as if I'm mad, meanwhile, they've all graduated at least 1-2years ago, and the jobs they have cannot be listed on their CVs!. Before I came here for my top-up, I was working in a small Business Consultancy in GRA Ikeja (without a B.Sc) and I was earning 100K (approx 400pounds). The money wasn't so fantastic, but my standard of living was a lot better than it currently is in London. I didn't have to pay rent, worry about feeding etc etc.

I don't believe living abroad is a do-or-die matter, especially as most people are actually suffering here. Moreover, naija is not the worst place on earth, so I don't see any reason why we can't go back home when living abroad turns into a living hell.

@Ghurka,
The greatest expenses all over the world is accommodation cost. If you have free accommodation in London, life will be the best. In Nigeria (e.g. GRA Ikeja), accommodation prices for rent or buy are very high too. Everyone do not have free accommodation and free food as you.

@Ghurka,

Go to Wembley Market for a better price for plantain and other stuffs:
http://www.wendyfairmarkets.com/market/index/id/40/name/Wembley

beknown:

@Ghurka,
The greatest expenses all over the world is accommodation cost. If you have free accommodation in London, life will be the best. In Nigeria (e.g. GRA Ikeja), accommodation prices for rent or buy are very high too. Everyone do not have free accommodation and free food as you.

I wasn't living in GRA Ikeja, I was working there and living in Maryland. I do agree with you that accommodation cost is the greatest of all expenses, but you and I know that getting free accommodation in London is almost impossible (especially if u don't have a job). On the contrary, If u're jobless in naija, u'd at least have somewhere to live (friends', cousins', aunts' etc) and someone might still be kind enough to feed u, this is very unlikely here, as most people are also struggling to make ends meet. That was what I meant by "not worrying about accommodation and feeding".

Thanks for the info on the market. Cheers

do you have to eat yam and plantain ? why not buy 1 huge bag of potato (3 pounds). that will last you 3 weeks

buzugee:

do you have to eat yam and plantain ? why not buy 1 huge bag of potato (3 pounds). that will last you 3 weeks

My thoughts exactly. . . .save the Nigerian food for special occasions.

PS - who knows of cheap markets to buy naija food in the Wimbledon area?