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Why You Shouldn't Rush Your Marriage plan - Romance - Nairaland

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Why You Shouldn't Rush Your Marriage plan by MrCaesar: 2:56pm On Nov 04, 2019
Marriage is a process. A process that should follow a procedure. When the procedure is not properly followed chances are that grave mistakes will be made. One indispensable fact about marriage is that it is a process that is not meant to be rushed. Why rush something you expect to last for a lifetime? Things hurriedly performed are most times bound to be erroneous. Some of these errors may not be easily corrected with just a wave of hand. Some people have lost their happiness as a result of errors related to marriage. Others have trade their lives along the line. One thing is certain about some of these errors, if the marriage lasts, it is doing so at the expense of someone's happiness.

One may be asking, what is hurriedly performed marriage? A hurriedly performed marriage with respect to this article is a marriage where two people just met and got married over a very short period of time, let's say within a maximum of three months. Most times, marriages that take this pattern are arranged marriages. Arranged marriages are marriages where partners are introduced to each other by either a relative or friend. It must be noted too that some religious marriages can be categorized under hurriedly performed marriage. Here, the people are either recommended by their pastor or through rigorous prayers and because of how authentic the sources appear to be, the participants see no need to wait or accommodate any delay as delay may be viewed as being rebellious.

Hurriedly performed marriages might have been favourable to some people, but the fact that it has strong pressing disadvantages cannot be overlooked. Some of its disadvantages are as explained bellow:

1. It may not be based on Love: This is one of the most scary disadvantages of hurriedly performed marriages. We have several feelings that disguise as love that are in fact not love. Some of these feelings are lust, infatuation, and likeness. Some of these feelings disappear after sex. In most cases, these feelings hardly last the test of time. Apart from these three above mentioned feelings, the fact that the feeling could be love, but a fake kind of love is another scary phenomenon. If you think you love someone, time helps a lot in validating your thought. You need time to truly be sure that what you feel for him or her is love, but the time you need to use in discovering your feeling, you already chanelled it into getting married. What if after everything, it wasn't love? What if you later discover that you don't love them? What if they later discover that they don't love you? How do you now handle it? At that particular time you feel pressured; at that particular time, when the feeling seems so hot; at that particular time when you feel you are on the right track; that particular time when you feel so madly into each other; why not give everything more time? You might be saving yourself a lot of stress by taking your time.

2. It might be love, but fake love: He might be a fake lover. She might be a fake lover. A fake lover will never treat you well. The peoblem here is not that they don't love you, but that they can never place you first. They are so self-centered that being with them will only render you damaged. You will never have lasting happiness with them. They are the type that will cheat. They are the type that will beat you. They are the type that will have no respect for you. They are the type that lack understanding. Your life with them will be like hell on earth.

3. You are married to a stranger: The fact that the marriage was hurriedly performed does not rule out the fact that the both of you are total strangers to each other. You will have zero level understanding. You may always have misunderstanding, or may not always have misunderstanding, but one thing might be certain, each time you have misunderstanding, heaven may get loosed. That you know someone from a far doesn't mean they will be good after marriage. Some people may be very good as a friend, but once they become a lover, they make life miserable for you. The worst happens when the both of you are not compatible or when there is no single chemistry.

4. You are not friends: This is a very big problem. When lovers are not friends, they can't communicate well. The both of you didn't have time to build friendship, it will bring in a big blow into the marriage. A marriage that lacks communication is dead on arrival. No marriage survives without communication, or better-still, no marriage is happy without communication. Marriage gets better with time, but somethings in marriage remain as they were when the marriage started. One of them is communication. If the both of you don't communicate well at the beginning of the marriage, there are higher chances that it will always remain that way. For you to have a long lasting marriage, your partner should be your best friend and your lover.

5. They may be hiding something: Have you ever considered that your partner may have a very dirty secret he's hiding? Have you ever considered she may be hiding something? This might perhaps be their reason for rushing the marriage. Perhaps, they don't want you to discover something about them. Allowing the whole process to linger and letting the both of you know each other more may blow everything out. What if they are criminals? What if they have very challenging health issue? What if they are into cultism. Cultism had in most cases resulted to the death of many women in Africa. It is very common for men into cultism to use their wives as sacrificial lamb. Some women don't have womb. Some already had unsuccessful abortions that had damaged their wombs. They may want everything rushed so the dude doesn't get to discover on time. In as much as someone having a health challenge may not always be enough reason to stop a marriage plan, but stuffs like this should be clearly known by your partner. If you have health issue, your partner should know before marrying you.

In conclusion, hurriedly performed marriage is the reason for most unhappy marriages in the world. You have to take your time. More than any other person else in the world, you need to know that person you are getting married to. You need to know them very well just as you know yourself. The disadvantages are very glaring. The end road is abject sadness. Please take your time.
https://www.caesarscircuit.com/2019/11/disadvantages-of-hurriedly-performed.html?m=1

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