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I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me - Family (8) - Nairaland

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Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by echepops(m): 12:43am On Feb 22, 2020
Mandem12:
I had to open a new account for this, pardon me for Punctuation errors. I have to go straight to the point so as not to bore you... My story goes thus

I'm a young man of 25. I met this very beautiful girl, aged 23 now, we've dated 4 years now. She's so humble, the love grew out of nowhere. She does everything a woman would do for a man and I do everything a man will do for a woman.

I found myself not doing anything without her and she cannot do anything without involving me, we actually love each other very much.

She started pestering me to have a blood oath with her because she was scared I would leave her. I laughed it off cos I knew I wouldn't cheat on her, she is everything I wanted in a woman.

Trouble started when I brought her home to meet my parents, I was actually happy that I had found my wife...

When she left, my father asked me where she was from, and I told him and my father told me I can't marry her because she was from the same village with me and thereby related by blood thereby marrying her is an abomination that she was my sister so to say and said our kinsmen would not be Involved if I insist on marrying her... I felt my world crumbling down like a pack of cards...

I told my girl and she was like, it's an old tradition and nobody will dictate to her who she would marry and she loves me and there was no going back...

As a man, I thought about it and wanted to let her go because I wouldn't want the stigma to be on us and my unborn kids... I showed her some attitude to make her hate me but she didn't, rather she would rather beg me not to leave her even when I'm at fault. I feel bad anytime I do anything to hurt her feelings...

Now, I actually want to get her pregnant and damn the consequences, do a court wedding if the need arises and relocate with her out from our state and start a new life elsewhere...

Another mind is telling me to let her go so we can move on with our lives, or even be a fugitive for her... I however know she will hurt herself if I leave her... I'm very confused about everything, I seriously need help... Why is Igbo tradition this way? I found love with this girl, now everything is about to be stripped away from me, just like that... I seriously need an advice please...

I love this girl so much and she make me happy


Please move this to front page so I can hear from others please...

Don't allow the devil to use you, pray for God's wisdom

1 Like

Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by BRATISLAVA: 12:43am On Feb 22, 2020
Makavelli25:
Same shit happening to me. Am in love with my stepsis
We are planning to run away

Why can't you find someone else? People live under the same roof as relatives not to fall in love with each other.

What is wrong with you people?

Is it fear or laziness to find another person? Lustful lot.
Later they claim the person has all the qualities they want.

Can't you get those qualities in a less scandalous way? Reason they bring in a staff or housemaid and they suddenly only want that person instead of them to find someone else. Ineptitude and laziness.
Everything is love and running away.

You were not put under the same roof with another person, be it for work or as family or any other way, to fall in love with the person. Keep your lust in check.

1 Like

Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by therajah: 12:44am On Feb 22, 2020
Gooddoorman:

Where did he mention igbo pls?
Read it well and see. Abi you dint pass comprehension in school?

1 Like

Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Neroiam(m): 12:45am On Feb 22, 2020
Gabbyodogwu:


This is the most stupid comment ever it seems that you are in the stone age all this practices are in the stone age this is modern day 21st century
Love is the most important factor in marriage d major reason why most marriages fail is cos of lack of love. Mehn you re such a dumb ass

No mind am. Na him type him parents dey carry for back go meet girl parents so...
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Auto200: 12:46am On Feb 22, 2020
Hehehe. My guy! !! I hail! Make I no waste time explaining things to you. Please you can go and marry as same

Do you know why Saudi Arabia and UAE has the highest rate of slowpoke?? They marry each other to help maintain the flow of wealth . I’m telling to first hand cos I’m a teacher here in one of the mental schools
Neroiam:


Respect which mumu tradition?

tradition that was created by ignorant ancestors swearing allegiance to stupid deities...

Respect God.. That's what you should say.

2 Likes

Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Auto200: 12:47am On Feb 22, 2020
There are some things that even God will not come to your rescue when you call him

Do you know why? Because he sent ppl like us to advise you but you no hear
Neroiam:


Anything pass God?

3 Likes

Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Neroiam(m): 12:49am On Feb 22, 2020
BRATISLAVA:


Why haven't you married your siblings or relatives? What are you waiting for?

Oga, ur thinking shallow o... Read deductively, this time, slowly
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by BRATISLAVA: 12:52am On Feb 22, 2020
Neroiam:


Oga, ur thinking shallow o... Read deductively, this time, slowly

You have been thinking shallow all over this thread. Are you Adam? And if Adam was right, why haven't you had sex with your relations to prove that there's nothing to it? What are you waiting for? Empty barrel.

1 Like

Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Neroiam(m): 12:55am On Feb 22, 2020
Auto200:
There are some things that even God will not come to your rescue when you call him

Do you know why? Because he sent ppl like us to advise you but you no hear

Last time i checked, the Holy Spirit is given to me to profit withal. God no talk to me, Him pikin, na to send you... So na u go talk to me when i go hear? Human beings sha...

Guy, sleep.. Night don cover.
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Neroiam(m): 12:56am On Feb 22, 2020
BRATISLAVA:


You have been thinking shallow all over this thread. Are you Adam? And if Adam was right, why haven't you had sex with your relations to prove that there's nothing to it? What are you waiting for? Empty barrel.

Ehn .. you win.. Sleep
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Finnese001: 12:57am On Feb 22, 2020
this guy must come from my village lol
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by BRATISLAVA: 12:58am On Feb 22, 2020
uzohrome:



Same thing am asking... We are talking waitin go make sense dem dey bring eve and Adam join. Is the guy or the girl came from the same village with Adam or Eve? We all from Africa have culture and norms even some of us from eastern part of this country are culturally homogeneous. Remember this culture has been there for centuries. Sure culture can be altered to fit in with modern life but we must state the facts not coming up with my history book or documentary without proof. All these spiritual books was written via inspiration not knowing where the inspiration comes from. If you can stay silent and concentrate for a long time you will be inspired most times you will hear clear voices talking to you. Hypnosis happens all the time. What you hear will be differed from what another person hears. But one will come and force or make you Belive that what he had was original and you should believe it and practice it. I have read plenty spiritual books they are all good. We Dont have to be dogmatic or sentimental or irrational to our sense of humor. Bringing Adam and Eve is extremely nonsense to the subject of discuss.

Don't mind that shallow character. He said he's being stubborn. All he has is stubbornness, not even the spirit of God he's using to insult people who don't agree to his talk about Adam.

The gene pool is so wide that there is no need for people related by any blood whatsoever to find themselves and get married. Yet he is playing the fool all over this thread. He should marry and have sex with his relatives before anyone will take him serious. Otherwise he's just an empty barrel.

2 Likes

Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by BRATISLAVA: 12:59am On Feb 22, 2020
Neroiam:


Ehn .. you win.. Sleep

No. You sleep.

When next you want to make your stubborn assertions based on your empty pride, leave God out of it lest you test Him.
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Neroiam(m): 1:01am On Feb 22, 2020
BRATISLAVA:


No. You sleep.

Oya dey dia make pant dey wear u na
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by BRATISLAVA: 1:02am On Feb 22, 2020
Neroiam:


Oya dey dia make pant dey wear u na

It is yourself.
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by corjiakor(m): 1:02am On Feb 22, 2020
Never marry a woman your parents rejected, the consequences are heavy that you can't bear.

This love you are mentioning can fade away within a short period of time, also remember there is room for divorce.

A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.


Mandem12:
I had to open a new account for this, pardon me for Punctuation errors. I have to go straight to the point so as not to bore you... My story goes thus

I'm a young man of 25. I met this very beautiful girl, aged 23 now, we've dated 4 years now. She's so humble, the love grew out of nowhere. She does everything a woman would do for a man and I do everything a man will do for a woman.

I found myself not doing anything without her and she cannot do anything without involving me, we actually love each other very much.

She started pestering me to have a blood oath with her because she was scared I would leave her. I laughed it off cos I knew I wouldn't cheat on her, she is everything I wanted in a woman.

Trouble started when I brought her home to meet my parents, I was actually happy that I had found my wife...

When she left, my father asked me where she was from, and I told him and my father told me I can't marry her because she was from the same village with me and thereby related by blood thereby marrying her is an abomination that she was my sister so to say and said our kinsmen would not be Involved if I insist on marrying her... I felt my world crumbling down like a pack of cards...

I told my girl and she was like, it's an old tradition and nobody will dictate to her who she would marry and she loves me and there was no going back...

As a man, I thought about it and wanted to let her go because I wouldn't want the stigma to be on us and my unborn kids... I showed her some attitude to make her hate me but she didn't, rather she would rather beg me not to leave her even when I'm at fault. I feel bad anytime I do anything to hurt her feelings...

Now, I actually want to get her pregnant and damn the consequences, do a court wedding if the need arises and relocate with her out from our state and start a new life elsewhere...

Another mind is telling me to let her go so we can move on with our lives, or even be a fugitive for her... I however know she will hurt herself if I leave her... I'm very confused about everything, I seriously need help... Why is Igbo tradition this way? I found love with this girl, now everything is about to be stripped away from me, just like that... I seriously need an advice please...

I love this girl so much and she make me happy


Please move this to front page so I can hear from others please...

1 Like 1 Share

Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Neroiam(m): 1:05am On Feb 22, 2020
BRATISLAVA:


It is yourself.

grin grin grin ..guy, make e b lata
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by BRATISLAVA: 1:09am On Feb 22, 2020
Neroiam:


grin grin grin ..guy, make e b lata

It is yourself. When next you want to make your stubborn assertions based on your empty pride, leave God out of it lest you test Him.

1 Like

Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Nobody: 1:11am On Feb 22, 2020
Neroiam:


First you said it's Oracle meting the punishment, now you're saying God. Which one should we take? Eh Madam..

Of course God doesn't support incest..

But in village of 2,000+ people you're saying everyone is related by blood and so mustn't marry.. Wakanda rubbish is that na

No worry, if you aren't married, let this fresh bobo from ur village come from US or Europe or even Ghana seff.. and proposes to you and because y'all from the same village, you tell him NO..

Na u go cry when ur small sister later marry am.
You'll wait for Oracle to kill them but Oracle no go do anything because Oracle no get level.

Hello.. Do you read to comprehend or you read to attack?
You asked who metes out punishment, and I asked you if I'm an oracle to know and you turn round to say I told you oracle metes out punishment.

As for whether I can't marry from my village, op and I do not share or have same tradition. In my place, we can marry from my mothers kindred but not from my father's kindred (same village) and every one respects that tradition. But if OPs tradition says otherwise, then let him respect it!
I will never ever make such mistake cos even at friendship level, I'll try to find out your roots and if you cannot trace your roots, then we ain't taking it no further. Forget all those things you said up there. We are not dumb in our family.

3 Likes

Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Parablesonmarble: 1:12am On Feb 22, 2020
priscaoge:
When they tell Youths of this generation to know their root, Cultures and traditions they will insult you and call you archaic/ancient. My Dear incest is NEVER accepted anywhere even in the Bible. Trust me you won’t be able to handle the consequences. If truly you both are related by blood, don’t go ahead with that plan of yours because it will backfire.


People on this NL who doesn’t understand how related you both are or what your traditions are will tell you to damn the tradition and marry her. Remember they won’t be there tomorrow to bear the consequences with you. They have their sacred traditions they respect and uphold but will quickly thrash yours just to sound woke undecided


There’s a huge difference between CIVILIZATION and TRADITIONS. Some cultures and traditions are still powerful no matter how civilized or how religious the World is. Listen to the WORDS OF WISDOM, Listen to the WORDS OF THE ELDERS

Please sir, this is not out of being rude or insensitive but more out of being curious. What do think happened to Albert Einstein, the greatest scientist of our time, on whose idea this phone and internet I'm communicating with u was fabricated? He married his first cousin after the end of his first marriage and heaven didn't fall. Was he given a special grace or was it just a case of love is where u find it? Not saying incest is good, just looking for more submissions to convince me man didn't evolve from lower animals. Thanks.
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by ngwababe(f): 1:21am On Feb 22, 2020
priscaoge:
When they tell Youths of this generation to know their root, Cultures and traditions they will insult you and call you archaic/ancient. My Dear incest is NEVER accepted anywhere even in the Bible. Trust me you won’t be able to handle the consequences. If truly you both are related by blood, don’t go ahead with that plan of yours because it will backfire.


People on this NL who doesn’t understand how related you both are or what your traditions are will tell you to damn the tradition and marry her. Remember they won’t be there tomorrow to bear the consequences with you. They have their sacred traditions they respect and uphold but will quickly thrash yours just to sound woke undecided


There’s a huge difference between CIVILIZATION and TRADITIONS. Some cultures and traditions are still powerful no matter how civilized or how religious the World is. Listen to the WORDS OF WISDOM, Listen to the WORDS OF THE ELDERS

You don't need to speak big grammar for him, it's totally an abomination. Their children won't even survive. Happened to my cousin, I think the lady and her child are late now.

But then, the kinsmen will need to divide themselves to represent each of them. grin
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Nobody: 1:23am On Feb 22, 2020
Your village people might by blood related, she might be your distant relation, it's the same with my village too. Most of them bear the same surname with me. Your father might not know how you're related to her but the elders do, her ancestors and yours could be siblings by blood. When you meet a girl for the first time, Ask her where she's from if you're interested in her! If she's from the same village as you ask your family indirectly if your tradition is okay with it.
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by johnsonaigbokie(m): 1:28am On Feb 22, 2020
Good story. I had a similar experience but overcame same then with superior argument and importantly dialogue. Please dialogue more with a convincing fact of multiple cross marriages have upturned the hitherto belief
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Neroiam(m): 1:31am On Feb 22, 2020
AshiraWealthy:


Hello.. Do you read to comprehend or you read to attack?
You asked who metes out punishment, and I asked you if I'm an oracle to know and you turn round to say I told you oracle metes out punishment.

As for whether I can't marry from my village, op and I do not share or have same tradition. In my place, we can marry from my mothers kindred but not from my father's kindred (same village) and every one respects that tradition. But if OPs tradition says otherwise, then let him respect it!
I will never ever make such mistake cos even at friendship level, I'll try to find out your roots and if you cannot trace your roots, then we ain't taking it no further. Forget all those things you said up there. We are not dumb in our family.


"Shey i resemble oracle ní" ...could also mean how I've interpreted it.. Read it again, slowly and reconcile it with my interpretation. You'll find it makes sense..

And nobody accepts being dumb.
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Nobody: 1:38am On Feb 22, 2020
Neroiam:



"Shey i resemble oracle ní" ...could also mean how I've interpreted it.. Read it again, slowly and reconcile it with my interpretation. You'll find it makes sense..

And nobody accepts being dumb.

Well I'm telling you that was not what I meant and it doesn't in any way affirm that the oracles mete out punishment. You go read it again. You misinterpreted the whole thing prolly due to your mindset.
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by bleskid: 1:55am On Feb 22, 2020
let me call brother as my tiv people use to call blother my people use to say if maket no sell bring the goods home ... i don't need to explain myself,,,or u wan surprise your village people ... en actor?
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Neroiam(m): 1:56am On Feb 22, 2020
AshiraWealthy:


Well I'm telling you that was not what I meant and it doesn't in any way affirm that the oracles mete out punishment. You go read it again. You misinterpreted the whole thing prolly due to your mindset.

Ehem.. I'm not wrong either... You're the author, I'm the audience.. Your mood and tone could be misinterpreted.. It gets clearer from text to audio and then visuals showing gestures.. I can read that single phrase and make a bunch of meanings outta it
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by jasontrigga(m): 2:01am On Feb 22, 2020
Mandem12:
I had to open a new account for this, pardon me for Punctuation errors. I have to go straight to the point so as not to bore you... My story goes thus

I'm a young man of 25. I met this very beautiful girl, aged 23 now, we've dated 4 years now. She's so humble, the love grew out of nowhere. She does everything a woman would do for a man and I do everything a man will do for a woman.

I found myself not doing anything without her and she cannot do anything without involving me, we actually love each other very much.

She started pestering me to have a blood oath with her because she was scared I would leave her. I laughed it off cos I knew I wouldn't cheat on her, she is everything I wanted in a woman.

Trouble started when I brought her home to meet my parents, I was actually happy that I had found my wife...

When she left, my father asked me where she was from, and I told him and my father told me I can't marry her because she was from the same village with me and thereby related by blood thereby marrying her is an abomination that she was my sister so to say and said our kinsmen would not be Involved if I insist on marrying her... I felt my world crumbling down like a pack of cards...

I told my girl and she was like, it's an old tradition and nobody will dictate to her who she would marry and she loves me and there was no going back...

As a man, I thought about it and wanted to let her go because I wouldn't want the stigma to be on us and my unborn kids... I showed her some attitude to make her hate me but she didn't, rather she would rather beg me not to leave her even when I'm at fault. I feel bad anytime I do anything to hurt her feelings...

Now, I actually want to get her pregnant and damn the consequences, do a court wedding if the need arises and relocate with her out from our state and start a new life elsewhere...

Another mind is telling me to let her go so we can move on with our lives, or even be a fugitive for her... I however know she will hurt herself if I leave her... I'm very confused about everything, I seriously need help... Why is Igbo tradition this way? I found love with this girl, now everything is about to be stripped away from me, just like that... I seriously need an advice please...

I love this girl so much and she make me happy


Please move this to front page so I can hear from others please...

Are you from Benue state ?
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by spafu(m): 2:17am On Feb 22, 2020
michlins:
in this situation, you're told that she's literally your own sister. Where on Earth is incest okay. This is what happens when family don't communicate and tell their kids where their root starts and ends. If you like, pregnant her, she will still be your sister and it's not changing the fact that you can't marry her
You asked, Where on Earth is incest okay? And my question is, how is she is sister? If she was his sister, how cones the boy's father did know her? What of other lands where people marry from the same village? In the north, cousins marry? Who did the first offsprings of Adam and Eve marry?
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by bezimo(m): 2:22am On Feb 22, 2020
Mandem12:
I had to open a new account for this, pardon me for Punctuation errors. I have to go straight to the point so as not to bore you... My story goes thus

I'm a young man of 25. I met this very beautiful girl, aged 23 now, we've dated 4 years now. She's so humble, the love grew out of nowhere. She does everything a woman would do for a man and I do everything a man will do for a woman.

I found myself not doing anything without her and she cannot do anything without involving me, we actually love each other very much.

She started pestering me to have a blood oath with her because she was scared I would leave her. I laughed it off cos I knew I wouldn't cheat on her, she is everything I wanted in a woman.

Trouble started when I brought her home to meet my parents, I was actually happy that I had found my wife...

When she left, my father asked me where she was from, and I told him and my father told me I can't marry her because she was from the same village with me and thereby related by blood thereby marrying her is an abomination that she was my sister so to say and said our kinsmen would not be Involved if I insist on marrying her... I felt my world crumbling down like a pack of cards...

I told my girl and she was like, it's an old tradition and nobody will dictate to her who she would marry and she loves me and there was no going back...

As a man, I thought about it and wanted to let her go because I wouldn't want the stigma to be on us and my unborn kids... I showed her some attitude to make her hate me but she didn't, rather she would rather beg me not to leave her even when I'm at fault. I feel bad anytime I do anything to hurt her feelings...

Now, I actually want to get her pregnant and damn the consequences, do a court wedding if the need arises and relocate with her out from our state and start a new life elsewhere...

Another mind is telling me to let her go so we can move on with our lives, or even be a fugitive for her... I however know she will hurt herself if I leave her... I'm very confused about everything, I seriously need help... Why is Igbo tradition this way? I found love with this girl, now everything is about to be stripped away from me, just like that... I seriously need an advice please...

I love this girl so much and she make me happy


Please move this to front page so I can hear from others please...

It may be a good idea as if I am face with similar situation I will consider doing that..what kind of stupid tradition is that..how can someone coming from your village be your relation..i don't understand..is the village not made up of different clans and families.Honestly your dad is been ridiculous.Like is this how igbo people think?

Guy be a man and stand your ground. Dont leave her.Insist on marrying her and if your kinsmem dont want to be involved then so be it..What will determine the longevity and happiness in your marriage is tied to you and her decision.


The girl loves you indeed from what you have stated.To find this kind of genuine love again Is not easy and would be very difficult..Its mainly yeye nonsense girls out there.So better don't leave her.If you were a girl I would have said it might be hard..but you are the man and it's easier for you to stand your ground.
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by Ramirezkhay(m): 2:23am On Feb 22, 2020
I just dy read comments since, all those taboo no dy work on their own OP... Na pipu way dy warn you go hide under taboo dy pepper you!
Re: I Want To Marry From My Village Against Everyone's Will please help me by bezimo(m): 2:30am On Feb 22, 2020
72Morale:
No matter how stubborn and wise you think you are; Don't ever go against tradition and against your family wishes once it has to do with marriage.

Love isn't even one of the top 5 things to consider in marriage because it's just a self-deceptive word that does not contribute anything to a marriage.

I agree but if the wishes are birthed from the place of sentiment and not objective perspective..it can be contested and rejected..i have seen many such cases..for instance..my dad was telling my elder bro don't marry igbo girl..we don't trust them...but my elder bro stood his ground and went ahead..today my dad was proved wrong as she is a good person from all indication.

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