| Re: . by bukatyne(f): 4:44pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
CsRockefeller:
You people are wicked. How can someone who just want a man to be happy with be reaching out of her league?
Chisos!! What type of world are we in? Is being a single mum a punishment or a disease?
Let me talk any further. You guys here make me weak everytime. It is her want to want: Does she deserve the men she wants? It is the men to decide. And hanging around men who claim to like/love you and marry someone else is seriously time wasting. Of course, the truth can sound wicked sometimes. Let her in addition to prayers review the men she is rejecting. 2 Likes |
| Re: . by MrToothBrush: 4:47pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
Mariangeles:
Kikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikiki 
OK. It depends on the spiritual realm you're referring to. abi oo |
| Re: . by CsRockefeller(m): 4:47pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
A lot of Nigerians are dumb and too stupid for my liking.
When a person makes a post like this, the first thing they seek is comfort. They need a hand over their shoulders first. You don't just tell someone that they are wallowing in self pity and co, gosh I'm angry.
Even Christians, do you think we are called Humans for jokes?
Jesus wept when they told him his friend Lazarus was dead, he had to power to bring him back, yet he wept.
If you don't have meaningful things to say on this platform please get the Bleep out of here!!!
No different from the disciples that tried to prevent the little children from seeing Jesus and trying to send the hungry 5000 men away.
Always trying to suppress people's pains, terrible people forming woke. 10 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: . by thorpido(m): 5:27pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
Op,while I acknowledge the spiritual,the biggest issue is your mind......Bible says 'casting down imaginations'.
Stop thinking you are yoked or cos you fornicated,God is forever punishing you.
The job market is tough and a lot of people are unemployed so your case is just one of them.Work more on hands on skills.The biggest issue you have with finances is the child you have to take care of cos you're doing it alone.
As per the men moving away,the honest truth is that you are a single mother and that may be the reason some of them move away.Review your positions with men that come around.Leave the fluffy feeling called love and look for purpose.The men that claim to want you,how serious are they? 1 Like |
| Re: . by Omar09(m): 6:35pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
divaluvmiz:
I can't believe I've spent 10 good years of my life without achieving any meaningful thing.
I was young, with great potentials and vision. I graduated early. Everybody wants me, but I don't know how it turn out like this.
I'm 32 already.
I graduated 10 years ago yet, I don't have a good job, I don't have a good marriage.
I felt this is not my life. Is like there's a switch somewhere.
Years ago, my late dad told me to send him my personal earned money so he can use it to buy goat and make some sacrifice to nulify some things on my behalf, otherwise, I would not be able to get a job with my certificate and I can't get married. then I was pregnant and wanted to get married to my child's father who was my friend. but I told my father that i can not do that. Because I'm a child of God and i don't believe in all that. (My dad was not a Christian. He was diabolic) Shortly, he died.
To my greatest surprised, my friend whom we were so much in love, who begged me with everything to keep our first child and not to have an abortion, the same guy who took me to his family and decleared we're having a baby and we wants to get married, left after 7 months into my pregnancy without any reason.
This is 7years already and nothing exciting has happened to me.
The only thing I heard from him, is messages of appology, no fianancia support. Nothing.
Till date, I don't have a meaningful job, I've watched good friends who loved me still walk away to marry some other people.
The last was my best friend who just got married. He told me few days to his wedding how much he loved me.
(What surprised me was: why didn't he tell me all along?) He's been so good to me. Every member of my family know him and they loved him. Nothing he can't do for me.
I had to block him on my phone so he can concentrate on his new life Instead calling me always.
He's not the first person who truly loved me, but can't marry me. I'm always meeting good people, who can walk a mile for me, but they can't marry me for no reason and they can't let me go.
The one I love to be with, always walk away. The one I have no connection, no interest in, are the one around me.
I just woke up and realized that I've really wasted time without achieving anything.
Could it be there are powers beyond God?
Are they prayers God don't answer until we appeal traditional gods?
Are they sin beyound God's forgiveness?
I was innocent and in love, had pre-marital sex and had a baby outside weddlock. Is this beyond God's forgiveness no matter how I tried?
I have been praying and asking God to fix my life even if there's a family course that I knew nothing about. Yet, nothing positive have changed. is there something I'm not doing well?
I feel depressed.
I don't even know how to help myself
Well good day ma'am. Wanted to let you know that there's nothing too big for God. And now we have seen the reason God abolished pre-marital sex... It leads to so many things of which being a single mom is one. While you are still waiting for that man, I'd like you to pick yourself up from the dirt and dust yourself up and train that child. Because the whole issue is now complicated with the child and your age. Your child is your home and abroad.... Keep him. Let him be your joy. I can not advise any man to be with a single mom cause they come with a lot of baggage of which the child and it's father is one. But I'm not here to bash you. For the part of job, people over qualified have not gotten any. All you have to do is be self employed. Look for something doing no matter how small. You can have a shop where you will sell soup condiments and rice.... You know. 2 Likes |
| Re: . by Nobody: 8:04pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
I appreciate some comments here. |
| Re: . by Bluehill1051: 8:19pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
Trash talk! 
|
| Re: . by Nobody: 8:32pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
Bluehill1051:
Trash talk! It would have been better you walk away without commenting. 1 Like |
| Re: . by travelland(f): 9:29pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
Go for deliverance 1 Like |
| Re: . by Nobody: 9:35pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
|
| Re: . by travelland(f): 9:41pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
1 Like |
| Re: . by Lalissa(f): 9:48pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
Amanee:
You have still not taken responsibility for your life and your life decisions, it's a shame...
You're 32, wallowing in self-pity and still blaming forces for the negative choices you made
Sorry to say, you're not ready for success yet. Can you be a little nicer? 1 Like |
| Re: . by Lalissa(f): 9:49pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
Xavfra:
Op.....
Good morning........
I understand what you feel even though not up to 5%....
But you gotta love yourself......
Accept yourself........
You see apart from other points you raised here....
One of your major challenges is comparison.....
One sad important good thing about life is that life is fairly unequal........
Everyone has their different roads on which they run life.....
You trying to compare yourself to someone else will distort your everything.....
Also you trying to run the way someone whose road is slippery runs means that you wouldn't get to your desire....
Life is a separate business we all are fully separate and different from other people....
Don't expect life to throw you what it throws at Mr A.........
You not getting a good job for you and your child in this situation is terrible in the current situation of Nigeria....but that doesn't mean that you should compare or begin to lose yourself......
Life is like boat in the ocean.....
You must brace yourself in order for you not to fallout.....
Also remove your mind from any thing like diabolic related not because they don't exists but because you yourself have nothing to do with it........it's a hard situation but brace your mind and pull it together, settle your mind, infact take your time and take up your destiny, your life.....hold it cause it's yours and no one else.....
Redesign your life not look like your neighbors on but how it should be.....
The moment you try to copy someone else you begin to limit your abilities....
Recreate your life and take charge
......
The marriage aspect........hmmmmmmmmmmm
It appears to be terrible because of what the society tends to believe.......
Ask yourself if the society fed you or bathed or cooked for you or gave you job......
Your life goal shouldn't be to please anyone or the society.....
But rather you should please yourself and achieve your desires......
You are you and no one else ......
The employment situation is really terrible....
But you shouldn't try to kill yourself because you can't get the kind of job you want......
Have you tried exploring other areas you must not work for others ......
In the current situation of this world, your degrees or certificates cannot provide what you want.....
Rather to survive in today's world you gotta use your brain so much..... utilize it......
Think outside the box.......
Try different things.....
Search things people can do on Google.....
It is hard in this life but the truth is that there is money......
We just gotta look beyond where we are ....
Stop comparison.........
Don't feel low....
There has never being a day age or degree has being a determinant of who will succeed or not....
What determines it isn't just hard work but smart work......
We humans create smart phones.....we too must be smart like them.....we must work smart like them....
Try your hand in many things....
You said your child is about 7 years ..... don't underestimate the power of your child.....as you begin to think outside the box carry your child along.....your child could work along with you .....
In this world your certificate is worthless......
Your certificate is only a credential in getting you to be able to work for someone else but it doesn't guarantee your success......
Just pull yourself together......
Recreate yourself.....
If you're an insider then you gotta open up yourself wisely to people and new ideas ....
For you to put your problems here.....I means you are ready to change and take the big leap today.....
To your marriage life ..
..
I don't see marriage as a thing for everyone
......
And that's why I tell you not to base your life in way to please the society......
Marriage is also no determinant of success or a peaceful life....
You are a woman ...
You are greater than you know.....
You don't have to let others exploit your potentials.....
Exploit your potentials to your benefit..
......
Keep our head up......
Create a good network of friends.....
Turn your friends to your customers, turn your customers to your friends......
Good luck
....
I would have said more but I think the little I've written here should at least compensate you to about 2 percent....
But don't forget God.....
If you believe him then stick to him...
If you believe in African traditional religion then stick to it....or if you're a Muslim stick to it except it contradicts your personal views .......
I wish you the best of luck....
Cheer up....
Live happily.....
No more comparisons..... Damn, you are intelligent. 1 Like |
| Re: . by Nobody: 10:05pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
Lalissa:
Damn, you are intelligent. Thank you.... I appreciate....... Most of of what I wrote are from my experiences........... I have separate stories for each....... I know how devastating it is...... ..... Wish you all good luck and success 1 Like |
| Re: . by Nobody: 10:19pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
Xavfra:
Op.....
Good morning........
I understand what you feel even though not up to 5%....
But you gotta love yourself......
Accept yourself........
You see apart from other points you raised here....
One of your major challenges is comparison.....
One sad important good thing about life is that life is fairly unequal........
Everyone has their different roads on which they run life.....
You trying to compare yourself to someone else will distort your everything.....
Also you trying to run the way someone whose road is slippery runs means that you wouldn't get to your desire....
Life is a separate business we all are fully separate and different from other people....
Don't expect life to throw you what it throws at Mr A.........
You not getting a good job for you and your child in this situation is terrible in the current situation of Nigeria....but that doesn't mean that you should compare or begin to lose yourself......
Life is like boat in the ocean.....
You must brace yourself in order for you not to fallout.....
Also remove your mind from any thing like diabolic related not because they don't exists but because you yourself have nothing to do with it........it's a hard situation but brace your mind and pull it together, settle your mind, infact take your time and take up your destiny, your life.....hold it cause it's yours and no one else.....
Redesign your life not look like your neighbors on but how it should be.....
The moment you try to copy someone else you begin to limit your abilities....
Recreate your life and take charge
......
The marriage aspect........hmmmmmmmmmmm
It appears to be terrible because of what the society tends to believe.......
Ask yourself if the society fed you or bathed or cooked for you or gave you job......
Your life goal shouldn't be to please anyone or the society.....
But rather you should please yourself and achieve your desires......
You are you and no one else ......
The employment situation is really terrible....
But you shouldn't try to kill yourself because you can't get the kind of job you want......
Have you tried exploring other areas you must not work for others ......
In the current situation of this world, your degrees or certificates cannot provide what you want.....
Rather to survive in today's world you gotta use your brain so much..... utilize it......
Think outside the box.......
Try different things.....
Search things people can do on Google.....
It is hard in this life but the truth is that there is money......
We just gotta look beyond where we are ....
Stop comparison.........
Don't feel low....
There has never being a day age or degree has being a determinant of who will succeed or not....
What determines it isn't just hard work but smart work......
We humans create smart phones.....we too must be smart like them.....we must work smart like them....
Try your hand in many things....
You said your child is about 7 years ..... don't underestimate the power of your child.....as you begin to think outside the box carry your child along.....your child could work along with you .....
In this world your certificate is worthless......
Your certificate is only a credential in getting you to be able to work for someone else but it doesn't guarantee your success......
Just pull yourself together......
Recreate yourself.....
If you're an insider then you gotta open up yourself wisely to people and new ideas ....
For you to put your problems here.....I means you are ready to change and take the big leap today.....
To your marriage life ..
..
I don't see marriage as a thing for everyone
......
And that's why I tell you not to base your life in way to please the society......
Marriage is also no determinant of success or a peaceful life....
You are a woman ...
You are greater than you know.....
You don't have to let others exploit your potentials.....
Exploit your potentials to your benefit..
......
Keep our head up......
Create a good network of friends.....
Turn your friends to your customers, turn your customers to your friends......
Good luck
....
I would have said more but I think the little I've written here should at least compensate you to about 2 percent....
But don't forget God.....
If you believe him then stick to him...
If you believe in African traditional religion then stick to it....or if you're a Muslim stick to it except it contradicts your personal views .......
I wish you the best of luck....
Cheer up....
Live happily.....
No more comparisons..... Nice one my brother 1 Like |
| Re: . by Nobody: 10:28pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
Meeyankee:
Nice one my brother Thank you.... God bless you..... |
| Re: . by Nobody: 10:39pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
GboyegaD:
First, you need to get yourself out of the thoughts of what your dad told you because the mind is a very powerful tool and just as the Bible says that "As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he".
You are the one you need to set yourself free and please, love yourself. Except you love yourself, no one will love you because what you project of yourself is what people get to see.
Most importantly, stop comparing yourself to others. Engage in things you love and watch your life blossom again. Above all, you need contentment, knowing it can only get better. |
| Re: . by Nobody: 10:45pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
divaluvmiz:
I can't believe I've spent 10 good years of my life without achieving any meaningful thing.
I was young, with great potentials and vision. I graduated early. Everybody wants me, but I don't know how it turn out like this.
I'm 32 already.
I graduated 10 years ago yet, I don't have a good job, I don't have a good marriage.
I felt this is not my life. Is like there's a switch somewhere.
Years ago, my late dad told me to send him my personal earned money so he can use it to buy goat and make some sacrifice to nulify some things on my behalf, otherwise, I would not be able to get a job with my certificate and I can't get married. then I was pregnant and wanted to get married to my child's father who was my friend. but I told my father that i can not do that. Because I'm a child of God and i don't believe in all that. (My dad was not a Christian. He was diabolic) Shortly, he died.
To my greatest surprised, my friend whom we were so much in love, who begged me with everything to keep our first child and not to have an abortion, the same guy who took me to his family and decleared we're having a baby and we wants to get married, left after 7 months into my pregnancy without any reason.
This is 7years already and nothing exciting has happened to me.
The only thing I heard from him, is messages of appology, no fianancia support. Nothing.
Till date, I don't have a meaningful job, I've watched good friends who loved me still walk away to marry some other people.
The last was my best friend who just got married. He told me few days to his wedding how much he loved me.
(What surprised me was: why didn't he tell me all along?) He's been so good to me. Every member of my family know him and they loved him. Nothing he can't do for me.
I had to block him on my phone so he can concentrate on his new life Instead calling me always.
He's not the first person who truly loved me, but can't marry me. I'm always meeting good people, who can walk a mile for me, but they can't marry me for no reason and they can't let me go.
The one I love to be with, always walk away. The one I have no connection, no interest in, are the one around me.
I just woke up and realized that I've really wasted time without achieving anything.
Could it be there are powers beyond God?
Are they prayers God don't answer until we appeal traditional gods?
Are they sin beyound God's forgiveness?
I was innocent and in love, had pre-marital sex and had a baby outside weddlock. Is this beyond God's forgiveness no matter how I tried?
I have been praying and asking God to fix my life even if there's a family course that I knew nothing about. Yet, nothing positive have changed. is there something I'm not doing well?
I feel depressed.
I don't even know how to help myself
|
| Re: . by Nobody: 10:52pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
divaluvmiz:
I can't believe I've spent 10 good years of my life without achieving any meaningful thing.
I was young, with great potentials and vision. I graduated early. Everybody wants me, but I don't know how it turn out like this.
I'm 32 already.
I graduated 10 years ago yet, I don't have a good job, I don't have a good marriage.
I felt this is not my life. Is like there's a switch somewhere.
Years ago, my late dad told me to send him my personal earned money so he can use it to buy goat and make some sacrifice to nulify some things on my behalf, otherwise, I would not be able to get a job with my certificate and I can't get married. then I was pregnant and wanted to get married to my child's father who was my friend. but I told my father that i can not do that. Because I'm a child of God and i don't believe in all that. (My dad was not a Christian. He was diabolic) Shortly, he died.
To my greatest surprised, my friend whom we were so much in love, who begged me with everything to keep our first child and not to have an abortion, the same guy who took me to his family and decleared we're having a baby and we wants to get married, left after 7 months into my pregnancy without any reason.
This is 7years already and nothing exciting has happened to me.
The only thing I heard from him, is messages of appology, no fianancia support. Nothing.
Till date, I don't have a meaningful job, I've watched good friends who loved me still walk away to marry some other people.
The last was my best friend who just got married. He told me few days to his wedding how much he loved me.
(What surprised me was: why didn't he tell me all along?) He's been so good to me. Every member of my family know him and they loved him. Nothing he can't do for me.
I had to block him on my phone so he can concentrate on his new life Instead calling me always.
He's not the first person who truly loved me, but can't marry me. I'm always meeting good people, who can walk a mile for me, but they can't marry me for no reason and they can't let me go.
The one I love to be with, always walk away. The one I have no connection, no interest in, are the one around me.
I just woke up and realized that I've really wasted time without achieving anything.
Could it be there are powers beyond God?
Are they prayers God don't answer until we appeal traditional gods?
Are they sin beyound God's forgiveness?
I was innocent and in love, had pre-marital sex and had a baby outside weddlock. Is this beyond God's forgiveness no matter how I tried?
I have been praying and asking God to fix my life even if there's a family course that I knew nothing about. Yet, nothing positive have changed. is there something I'm not doing well?
I feel depressed.
I don't even know how to help myself
TBH,we men find it hard to marry a woman with another man's child. We think of a lot of things like why didn't the father of her child marry her, what kind of life style led her to this and lot more questions like that. The truth is that having a child out of wedlock will reduce the number of suitors and those who even marry her will not want the child around him cause he see the child as extra baggage or only if he has a baggage of his own. It not easy to see a man who will love a woman and her child with another man. So I will suggest you pray to God to help you raise your child while you hope for a man that will love you and your child. Being a single mother always reduce a woman's chances of getting the man she wants because of the child, so unlike a single lady you don't get a lot of choice. Sorry if i sound harsh 1 Like |
| Re: . by Nobody: 11:07pm On Mar 18, 2020 |
MrToothBrush:
I think you already have a clue to what your problem is. It's never too late.
Struggle to get money and buy the goat. Look for people to help you cook and and go and give it to beggars.
Stop the sarcasm, this is a serious thread |
| Re: . by cococandy(f): 12:06am On Mar 19, 2020 |
If You let a social time line, time table, dead line or whatever you call it dictate your life you will never measure up. 4 Likes |
| Re: . by Anjola80: 12:34am On Mar 19, 2020 |
It's well with you sis. Please do not give up, continue to ask God for Mercy and Divine intervention. He will give you beauty for ashes. You will smile again. Just draw closer to Him. All must be well. 1 Like |
| Re: . by baby124: 10:10am On Mar 19, 2020 |
You need to stop telling all these men about your so called curse. Some women meet men and all of a sudden they become best friends and start talking like tap. There is nothing they cannot say! Why won’t the men run away? Who wants a cursed wife?
If you know where your dad needed to sacrifice that goat you better go and find where to do the ritual so mentally you can be free. Sometimes you need to give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar. Even though I don’t believe in this shits but just do it for your peace of mind to cancel that angle out. 5 Likes |
| Re: . by Nobody: 10:12am On Mar 19, 2020 |
M00N:
TBH,we men find it hard to marry a woman with another man's child. We think of a lot of things like why didn't the father of her child marry her, what kind of life style led her to this and lot more questions like that. The truth is that having a child out of wedlock will reduce the number of suitors and those who even marry her will not want the child around him cause he see the child as extra baggage or only if he has a baggage of his own. It not easy to see a man who will love a woman and her child with another man. So I will suggest you pray to God to help you raise your child while you hope for a man that will love you and your child. Being a single mother always reduce a woman's chances of getting the man she wants because of the child, so unlike a single lady you don't get a lot of choice. Sorry if i sound
harsh |
| Re: . by Nobody: 10:15am On Mar 19, 2020 |
bukatyne:
It is her want to want:
Does she deserve the men she wants?
It is the men to decide.
And hanging around men who claim to like/love you and marry someone else is seriously time wasting.
Of course, the truth can sound wicked sometimes.
Let her in addition to prayers review the men she is rejecting. Deserve as how? Like the men are too good for her or what do you mean? 2 Likes |
| Re: . by bukatyne(f): 10:18am On Mar 19, 2020 |
easyconnect:
Deserve as how? Like the men are too good for her or what do you mean? If she levels up with the men she is interested in. Just how a guy wants to chyke a lady and they tell him 'he is not in her level.' Water seeks its level. 2 Likes |
| Re: . by bukatyne(f): 10:21am On Mar 19, 2020 |
easyconnect:
Some of you claiming we can't marry single mother are not even capable of loving yourself not to talk of loving a single lady. I blame the @op who brought her personal life here in the first place.
You don't need to be sorry. You are harsh already Everyone has the right to their choice. I know a lady who did not marry a single dad even though her own sister was a single mom. 1 Like |
| Re: . by UjuJoan2: 10:29am On Mar 19, 2020 |
CsRockefeller:
You people are wicked. How can someone who just want a man to be happy with be reaching out of her league?
Chisos!! What type of world are we in? Is being a single mum a punishment or a disease?
Let me talk any further. You guys here make me weak every time. You just have to face facts, being a single mother/father comes with a lot of consequences. Most people would not want to get involved with them. I remember meeting an OAP when I was single, he was a local celebrity and was all over me. I was even catching feelings and falling for his moves already. He would play me love songs in his morning shows and do 'shout out' to me all day. It was wonderful . . . until I found out he had an 8-YO daughter. You see I didn't see myself becoming a mother to an 8YO that wasn't mine. I just couldn't. You can't judge people for the choices they make and the actions they take. That's why when you make a decision, you need to be ready to face the consequences. 4 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: . by UjuJoan2: 10:34am On Mar 19, 2020 |
easyconnect:
Deserve as how? Like the men are too good for her or what do you mean? Everything in life has a class/level. There is a reason why the Cinderella story is a fairytale, it doesn't really happen that way in real life. Even if people love outside their social circles, getting married to them is a whole different ball game. That's just the way life is. Besides, I always believe a woman should have more to offer aside from her body. If you want to 'marry up', you better make sure you are worth something yourself! 1 Like |
| Re: . by Acidosis(m): 10:45am On Mar 19, 2020 |
You're just bored sis. Change your location and get a job. 1 Like |
| Re: . by CsRockefeller(m): 11:09am On Mar 19, 2020 |
UjuJoan2:
You just have to face facts, being a single mother/father comes with a lot of consequences. Most people would not want to get involved with them.
I remember meeting an OAP when I was single, he was a local celebrity and was all over me. I was even catching feelings and falling for his moves already. He would play me love songs in his morning shows and do 'shout out' to me all day. It was wonderful . . . until I found out he had an 8-YO daughter.
You see I didn't see myself becoming a mother to an 8YO that wasn't mine. I just couldn't.
You can't judge people for the choices they make and the actions they take. That's why when you make a decision, you need to be ready to face the consequences. Alright. |
| Re: . by Nobody: 12:16pm On Mar 19, 2020 |
. |
