jedisco:
When you settle down with an average Western lady, then you'd likely notice yourself praying for the problems your average Nigerian lady would give...

Take some examples...

With a Nigerian lady, you both may be arguing about how often your parent/her parent would come over and budget for that. For a white lady, she does not even understand why your mum or dad wants to leave Nigeria and come over talk more of budgeting for such.

With a Nigerian lady, you both may be arguing about how often she'd cook fresh food or eat semi-processed food. With her white counterpart, it'd be at least 50-50 spread between you both to cook


This is not even considering the occasions where you msy have dinner with her family snd be the only black person on the tabke with its attendant effects. When you 'make it', you wouldn't want your kids to pass through some trash or discrimination among relatives.

Only a Nigerian lafy (or of similar background) would understand and appreciate the struggle you went through to migrate. The problem is that some Nigerian men want to be 100% traditional men in a White mans land

There are lots of reasons why once Nigerian dudes xan get on thrir feet, they look home

lefulefu:
all these assumptions una dey use on white girls ehn ..who told u she wouldnt want ur parents to visit.Exept maybe if ur siblings are naturally trouble makers and ur mom is a replica of a patience ozokwor.And take note any woman who does not like ur siblings weda she is white,black,akata,green or whatever she is not a good woman and u shoudlnt be wiving such a woman

prince2pac:
That your last statement na confirm... I have these two white girls if mine... when ever we are on video call and they haven't spoken with everyone around that call never start... and like you said, all these are assumptions... person weh like you, don like you... no be my Brit girl I de teach how to cook okra last three weeks.... she too like food... so always like I want to know how to cook this or that...

lefulefu:
yes nau..there are white girls who learn how to cook foreign menus of the men they are married to..there some who even learn how to prepare mediterean and african diets just for fun.op hasnt met italian and eastern european girls thats why he's sounding ignorant.And even american women that many ppl would say dont cook there many who prepare home made meals.havent u heard about country girls in the south?
Have u not heard about Martha Stewart?
Martha Stewart is american and she is rich and she had a cooking show back in the day where she cooked her own meals
what is even funny is that many westerners are now seeing the dangers of eating junk with the advent of obesity and child obesity and many are now doing home made meals for their families whole we africans are now embracing junk and eating unhealthy meals outside
date a ukranian or iranian girl and u would see she is no different from a homebred african woman
Its not only african women who cook for their kids
other women in other regions also cook

jedisco:
Of late, much has been said of how Nigerian ladies destroy their men when they get abroad and of course, the usual nairaland women bashing was rampant on such threads. I decided to repost a thought I has on this and follow up views


What many people forget are certain things I'd outline for clarity.

1. Being married in the west is different from marriage in Nigeria. That is what many don't get. Just as with kids, no matter how 'African' and disciplined you claim to be, don't go about using whips on your kids or you'd get into serious issues. Same applies with marriage. People want to get married in the west but want to lord it all as in Nigeria


2. To add to the point above. Most naija guys would go out and treat younger European kids with respect and dignity but they come home and want their wives to kneel and serve them. Most ladies would see how u treat their fellows outside and take a cue.

3. There are multiple privileges that come with being a man in Nigeria that no one would give in the West.
There is nothing that the Nigerian lady did that an average white lady wouldn't do and exceed. If in doubt, ask the white married dudes what they pass through. It's in Nigeria that a married man would have lots of girlfriends and the wife would know and do nothing.

4. Another phrase getting common on nairaland is that 'most Nigerian ladies are entitled'. I'd hazard to say that if you think they're entitled, then you've not come across a white lady living in the west. You can ask the average white lady what they think about the roles we've come to expect from ladies in Nigeria

5. There are lots of success stories with Nigerian marriages. Most successful marriages are based on compatibility. Fact is for most Nigerians who grew up in Nigeria, they'd be most compatible with a fellow Nigerian and hence having likelihood of long lasting relationships with them.


6. They're are lots of things that are taken for granted with a Nigerian brought up lady that would be major issues if it was a white counterpart e.g maintaining a relationship with relatives, model of training ones kids, maintaining ones heritage in their offspring, food, domestic chores e.t.c.
Except if you're marrying for survival (papers) but if you're standing on both feet, it'd be difficult to gel with the average white lady for a long-term relationship. Good luck finding a British lady that would rather spend her summer touring your 'boring' relatives in Nigeria than vacationing somewhere else
I'm not even talking about Asians, cos they too have a very strong cultural background.

7. In the US, it seems there's a pattern with Nigerian nurses. But it seems some guys idea of bringing a lady over is for her to work as (or train her to be) a nurse, make much more that him while he expects her to bring it back for them to spend, and he'd still Lord ot over her like they were back in Nigeria. In the west, the society would not expect a lady to remain in such a relationship for the sake of being married.

8. Finally, the fact is that a good number (didn't say all or majority) of Nigerian dudes abroad are in the lower economic classes and take up humble jobs. But these same dudes want to get married to a lady and not be humble at home. They want to be Hitler at home but outside they become doves...


I agree that some ladies are the devil's incarnate and would bring anyone down. But that trait is not shared by Nigerian ladies alone or by one sex for that matter.

J111333:
There is no doubt that some Nigerian wives abroad are evil but sometimes, take a good look at their husbands.

Oftentimes, our Nigerian "[i]businessmen[/i]" abroad bring young wives as their retirement packages.

When the hidden reason for marrying and bringing somebody's daughter abroad is a mischievous one, karma will surely give the man a golddigger for a wife.

Some of these our older brothers were mostly doing "businesses" abroad and wasting the proceeds when the goings were good. No job, no fall back plans and they were mostly efulefus back in the day going from one party to another. Their mates today are police captains, military colonels, senior government employees, business managers and senior medical workers but our brothers after acquiring irrelevant educational degrees with accumulated student loans, started sending cars back to Nigeria making fast money and never planned for old age.

As soon as the so called "businesses" started going south, they hurriedly went back to Naija at over 50yrs of age, married some young village girls to be trained as nurses and settled at home before the television waiting for them to be doing account like Oga wey give pesin keke Napep on hire purchase forgetting that there's a word like revolution in the dictionary.

Even some young men today don't wanna be useful to themselves and their young families. They won't hold steady jobs, won't help their wives at home to the extent that their wives work two jobs with all the overtime and still pay for childcare whereas the husbands sit idle at home claiming to be businessmen.

With their attitudes, they end up making good women (in some occasions) turn to evil witches out of frustration.

lefulefu:
most new generation nigerian guys i know are certainly not coming home to pick wives.the few u see who come home to pick girls are those who left their girlfriends back home while on their foreign trip.many guys are wise now and learning from the mistake of their predesors .One of my guy who left since 2016 is married to a mexican lady.he has a child with the lady now.Sometimes when i jokingly ask him if he will go back to naija to pick to pick a homebased wife he always say no and that he satisfied with his wife in the US.So men are learning from their mistakes

AfroKnight:



Gbam!

Bros, you know the 411.

The OP just posted a very unfair portrayal naija men.

Naija babes are the real issue. Men no dey gree import wife again cos their wahala too much. Even those who relocated as singles. Marrying them is quite the risk.

Make I no too talk before dem face me.

lefulefu:
younger guys overseas have broadened their options.To be honest with u the nigerian guys i see overseas who tend to urge their ppl to look for wives for them are mostly men in their 60s and upwards.these ones don marry multiple times and divorced.In such cases they will now urge their ppl to look for one small girl for village or his ppl will force one small girl on him.Thats when u hear about such girls dumping them and going for younger men wen they finish from nursing or med school

jedisco:
Of late, much has been said of how Nigerian ladies destroy their men when they get abroad and of course, the usual nairaland women bashing was rampant on such threads. I decided to repost a thought I has on this and follow up views


What many people forget are certain things I'd outline for clarity.

1. Being married in the west is different from marriage in Nigeria. That is what many don't get. Just as with kids, no matter how 'African' and disciplined you claim to be, don't go about using whips on your kids or you'd get into serious issues. Same applies with marriage. People want to get married in the west but want to lord it all as in Nigeria


2. To add to the point above. Most naija guys would go out and treat younger European kids with respect and dignity but they come home and want their wives to kneel and serve them. Most ladies would see how u treat their fellows outside and take a cue.

3. There are multiple privileges that come with being a man in Nigeria that no one would give in the West.
There is nothing that the Nigerian lady did that an average white lady wouldn't do and exceed. If in doubt, ask the white married dudes what they pass through. It's in Nigeria that a married man would have lots of girlfriends and the wife would know and do nothing.

4. Another phrase getting common on nairaland is that 'most Nigerian ladies are entitled'. I'd hazard to say that if you think they're entitled, then you've not come across a white lady living in the west. You can ask the average white lady what they think about the roles we've come to expect from ladies in Nigeria

5. There are lots of success stories with Nigerian marriages. Most successful marriages are based on compatibility. Fact is for most Nigerians who grew up in Nigeria, they'd be most compatible with a fellow Nigerian and hence having likelihood of long lasting relationships with them.


6. They're are lots of things that are taken for granted with a Nigerian brought up lady that would be major issues if it was a white counterpart e.g maintaining a relationship with relatives, model of training ones kids, maintaining ones heritage in their offspring, food, domestic chores e.t.c.
Except if you're marrying for survival (papers) but if you're standing on both feet, it'd be difficult to gel with the average white lady for a long-term relationship. Good luck finding a British lady that would rather spend her summer touring your 'boring' relatives in Nigeria than vacationing somewhere else
I'm not even talking about Asians, cos they too have a very strong cultural background.

7. In the US, it seems there's a pattern with Nigerian nurses. But it seems some guys idea of bringing a lady over is for her to work as (or train her to be) a nurse, make much more that him while he expects her to bring it back for them to spend, and he'd still Lord ot over her like they were back in Nigeria. In the west, the society would not expect a lady to remain in such a relationship for the sake of being married.

8. Finally, the fact is that a good number (didn't say all or majority) of Nigerian dudes abroad are in the lower economic classes and take up humble jobs. But these same dudes want to get married to a lady and not be humble at home. They want to be Hitler at home but outside they become doves...
LOL!!

I agree that some ladies are the devil's incarnate and would bring anyone down. But that trait is not shared by Nigerian ladies alone or by one sex for that matter.

jedisco:
Of late, much has been said of how Nigerian ladies destroy their men when they get abroad and of course, the usual nairaland women bashing was rampant on such threads. I decided to repost a thought I has on this and follow up views


What many people forget are certain things I'd outline for clarity.

1. Being married in the west is different from marriage in Nigeria. That is what many don't get. Just as with kids, no matter how 'African' and disciplined you claim to be, don't go about using whips on your kids or you'd get into serious issues. Same applies with marriage. People want to get married in the west but want to lord it all as in Nigeria


2. To add to the point above. Most naija guys would go out and treat younger European kids with respect and dignity but they come home and want their wives to kneel and serve them. Most ladies would see how u treat their fellows outside and take a cue.

3. There are multiple privileges that come with being a man in Nigeria that no one would give in the West.
There is nothing that the Nigerian lady did that an average white lady wouldn't do and exceed. If in doubt, ask the white married dudes what they pass through. It's in Nigeria that a married man would have lots of girlfriends and the wife would know and do nothing.

4. Another phrase getting common on nairaland is that 'most Nigerian ladies are entitled'. I'd hazard to say that if you think they're entitled, then you've not come across a white lady living in the west. You can ask the average white lady what they think about the roles we've come to expect from ladies in Nigeria

5. There are lots of success stories with Nigerian marriages. Most successful marriages are based on compatibility. Fact is for most Nigerians who grew up in Nigeria, they'd be most compatible with a fellow Nigerian and hence having likelihood of long lasting relationships with them.


6. They're are lots of things that are taken for granted with a Nigerian brought up lady that would be major issues if it was a white counterpart e.g maintaining a relationship with relatives, model of training ones kids, maintaining ones heritage in their offspring, food, domestic chores e.t.c.
Except if you're marrying for survival (papers) but if you're standing on both feet, it'd be difficult to gel with the average white lady for a long-term relationship. Good luck finding a British lady that would rather spend her summer touring your 'boring' relatives in Nigeria than vacationing somewhere else
I'm not even talking about Asians, cos they too have a very strong cultural background.

7. In the US, it seems there's a pattern with Nigerian nurses. But it seems some guys idea of bringing a lady over is for her to work as (or train her to be) a nurse, make much more that him while he expects her to bring it back for them to spend, and he'd still Lord ot over her like they were back in Nigeria. In the west, the society would not expect a lady to remain in such a relationship for the sake of being married.

8. Finally, the fact is that a good number (didn't say all or majority) of Nigerian dudes abroad are in the lower economic classes and take up humble jobs. But these same dudes want to get married to a lady and not be humble at home. They want to be Hitler at home but outside they become doves...


I agree that some ladies are the devil's incarnate and would bring anyone down. But that trait is not shared by Nigerian ladies alone or by one sex for that matter.

jedisco:
Of late, much has been said of how Nigerian ladies destroy their men when they get abroad and of course, the usual nairaland women bashing was rampant on such threads. I decided to repost a thought I has on this and follow up views


What many people forget are certain things I'd outline for clarity.

1. Being married in the west is different from marriage in Nigeria. That is what many don't get. Just as with kids, no matter how 'African' and disciplined you claim to be, don't go about using whips on your kids or you'd get into serious issues. Same applies with marriage. People want to get married in the west but want to lord it all as in Nigeria


2. To add to the point above. Most naija guys would go out and treat younger European kids with respect and dignity but they come home and want their wives to kneel and serve them. Most ladies would see how u treat their fellows outside and take a cue.

3. There are multiple privileges that come with being a man in Nigeria that no one would give in the West.
There is nothing that the Nigerian lady did that an average white lady wouldn't do and exceed. If in doubt, ask the white married dudes what they pass through. It's in Nigeria that a married man would have lots of girlfriends and the wife would know and do nothing.

4. Another phrase getting common on nairaland is that 'most Nigerian ladies are entitled'. I'd hazard to say that if you think they're entitled, then you've not come across a white lady living in the west. You can ask the average white lady what they think about the roles we've come to expect from ladies in Nigeria

5. There are lots of success stories with Nigerian marriages. Most successful marriages are based on compatibility. Fact is for most Nigerians who grew up in Nigeria, they'd be most compatible with a fellow Nigerian and hence having likelihood of long lasting relationships with them.


6. They're are lots of things that are taken for granted with a Nigerian brought up lady that would be major issues if it was a white counterpart e.g maintaining a relationship with relatives, model of training ones kids, maintaining ones heritage in their offspring, food, domestic chores e.t.c.
Except if you're marrying for survival (papers) but if you're standing on both feet, it'd be difficult to gel with the average white lady for a long-term relationship. Good luck finding a British lady that would rather spend her summer touring your 'boring' relatives in Nigeria than vacationing somewhere else
I'm not even talking about Asians, cos they too have a very strong cultural background.

7. In the US, it seems there's a pattern with Nigerian nurses. But it seems some guys idea of bringing a lady over is for her to work as (or train her to be) a nurse, make much more that him while he expects her to bring it back for them to spend, and he'd still Lord ot over her like they were back in Nigeria. In the west, the society would not expect a lady to remain in such a relationship for the sake of being married.

8. Finally, the fact is that a good number (didn't say all or majority) of Nigerian dudes abroad are in the lower economic classes and take up humble jobs. But these same dudes want to get married to a lady and not be humble at home. They want to be Hitler at home but outside they become doves...


I agree that some ladies are the devil's incarnate and would bring anyone down. But that trait is not shared by Nigerian ladies alone or by one sex for that matter.

AfroKnight:



Gbam!

Bros, you know the 411.

The OP just posted a very unfair portrayal of naija men.

Naija babes are the real issue. Men no dey gree import wife again cos their wahala too much. Even those who relocated as singles. Marrying them is quite the risk.

Make I no too talk before dem face me.

jedisco:
Of late, much has been said of how Nigerian ladies destroy their men when they get abroad and of course, the usual nairaland women bashing was rampant on such threads. I decided to repost a thought I has on this and follow up views


What many people forget are certain things I'd outline for clarity.

1. Being married in the west is different from marriage in Nigeria. That is what many don't get. Just as with kids, no matter how 'African' and disciplined you claim to be, don't go about using whips on your kids or you'd get into serious issues. Same applies with marriage. People want to get married in the west but want to lord it all as in Nigeria


2. To add to the point above. Most naija guys would go out and treat younger European kids with respect and dignity but they come home and want their wives to kneel and serve them. Most ladies would see how u treat their fellows outside and take a cue.

3. There are multiple privileges that come with being a man in Nigeria that no one would give in the West.
There is nothing that the Nigerian lady did that an average white lady wouldn't do and exceed. If in doubt, ask the white married dudes what they pass through. It's in Nigeria that a married man would have lots of girlfriends and the wife would know and do nothing.

4. Another phrase getting common on nairaland is that 'most Nigerian ladies are entitled'. I'd hazard to say that if you think they're entitled, then you've not come across a white lady living in the west. You can ask the average white lady what they think about the roles we've come to expect from ladies in Nigeria

5. There are lots of success stories with Nigerian marriages. Most successful marriages are based on compatibility. Fact is for most Nigerians who grew up in Nigeria, they'd be most compatible with a fellow Nigerian and hence having likelihood of long lasting relationships with them.


6. They're are lots of things that are taken for granted with a Nigerian brought up lady that would be major issues if it was a white counterpart e.g maintaining a relationship with relatives, model of training ones kids, maintaining ones heritage in their offspring, food, domestic chores e.t.c.
Except if you're marrying for survival (papers) but if you're standing on both feet, it'd be difficult to gel with the average white lady for a long-term relationship. Good luck finding a British lady that would rather spend her summer touring your 'boring' relatives in Nigeria than vacationing somewhere else
I'm not even talking about Asians, cos they too have a very strong cultural background.

7. In the US, it seems there's a pattern with Nigerian nurses. But it seems some guys idea of bringing a lady over is for her to work as (or train her to be) a nurse, make much more that him while he expects her to bring it back for them to spend, and he'd still Lord ot over her like they were back in Nigeria. In the west, the society would not expect a lady to remain in such a relationship for the sake of being married.

8. Finally, the fact is that a good number (didn't say all or majority) of Nigerian dudes abroad are in the lower economic classes and take up humble jobs. But these same dudes want to get married to a lady and not be humble at home. They want to be Hitler at home but outside they become doves...


I agree that some ladies are the devil's incarnate and would bring anyone down. But that trait is not shared by Nigerian ladies alone or by one sex for that matter.