Tango123:


You rightly described it. I was lucky.
Good women are scarce. Very scarce.

I will say just keep being yourself. Never ever try to impress a woman with money or gifts or by doikg ridiculous things

I met my wife at a function. She is tall, slim, very dark complexioned. What attracted me to her was her black skin. I was like, who is this dark skinned lady who never bleached or lightened her skin. I went to her and we spoke. We became friends initially. No dating on the cards. No sex. Just friends. The more i got to know her, the more i realised this is the one for me

First gift i bought her was a wrist watch. For her birthday. It was about 20k. Many years ago, when 20k was money

On my birthday she bought me s phone. A phone worth about 30k then. This is many years ago. When 30k was money

How many women do that.


When she visited me the first time, i didnt cook anything outlandish, or take her out to a nice place. No. She just came to my apartment. I was real. No pretences.

When we go out for meals, we struggle over who pays the bill.

We once went on holiday. I looked at a cloth and liked it. But felt it was too pricey. She insisted on paying for it herself. For me.

Women like that are rare


I wish u luck bro. Just dont pretend. Dont go out for dating. Begin woth friendship. In that way u are likely to see the true person. If thenperson is for u, then move it to dating.

Well, i dont know ur age and if u are in a hurry. I was not in a hurry. And as u said, i was lucky

Very lucky man, in present Nigeria that a woman will be earning and will still wait for you to come back and give her money for Maggi

davien:
scammed me Wella oh, I did it all. Today I wise die because of it.

Lol congratulations that's how one stupid girl made to become an alpha male now no Time for dulling

Zzor:
assist her if you can from your heart and I believe she's wise enough to know where and when to assist you as per responsibilities.

You can't assume the level of someone's wisdom. Wisdom is measured first by words and then actions. So she's simply failed her first chance to prove her level of wisdom.

You know the story of the virtuous woman in the Bible? Yeahh?

It's from the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.

The lady might just be the selfish type from all indications. I dated her type and it can be sickening to see that a person who you're willing to sacrifice so much for isn't willing to any length for You.

The guy needs to be very careful coz he'll be in serious danger if he faces any financial challenge.

oyinella:

Yes! It's the duty of the man to provide for his family, and the duty of the wife to help.. She said she was going to help didnt she? Then again, that's my opinion

Okay o

Alwaysachick:



She has a family oga.

Lazy men. Leeches looking for girls to feed them. Isn't it the order of the day now.

I will tell the OP not to give her the 1.2m promised. Let her go to her family.

Hassanmaye:

Another lucky man from another planet, for you to get a woman that buys you clothes in Nigeria bro you should fast for one month and thank almighty God

Bro. Gender roles are becoming blurred by the day. Most of the things you said men and women are "wired" to do doesn't apply to my home. My wife and I just understand what needs to be done and get it done, whether cooking, washing, buying stuffs in the house. Couple need to understand themselves and work in agreement.

For the OP, he sought for that agreement but the fiance is not in sync with his expectation. They still need to come to an agreement before proceeding to other matters. This is important, so that they don't get disappointed when married. They must to have these kind of discussion to create a peculiar path for their family. Your experience and mine may not be their template, just what they have agreed that will work for them

There's no wrong with sharing the finances 50/50 with her only if you share the house chores 50/50 with her. That includes doing laundry, washing dishes, cooking, nursing the kids, going to the market etc.

Whenever it comes to responsibilities in the family,, the females always forget about their cherished Feminism..

for this response,if I were you. I'd invest that money into something else. now get a reality check,even if you didn't provide that money for her,you will provide for her,same as if you did. and if you are not sure of returns from Her side of the hustling,why not reinvest that same money into a hustle you can oversee to get that money to provide for her at least you'll be "sure" you're getting the returns. unlike when you give her all that money and provision is done "when she feels like it"

SweetCunt97:
Atleast she did not pretend. Best you remove eye from woman money sha or go marry oyibo

Hello sweetcunt. I like sweetcunt & I dont wanto be gay no more. I like to enjoy u. Please can I no u please?

Biglugard:


You're a compound fool

Is there no better way to get your message across aside insult?

Check am, have you made any sense from this statement?

Zzor:
Is he marrying her for gains, why are you men becoming leeches smh

So what is she expected to bring to the table?

Anoymus:
I have a girlfriend I am meaning to propose to during the festive period, she's everything I want in a woman except few exception which might be a hindrance to the proposal.
Gist is, my babe is a graduate but lack of work made her to learn fashion designing, she's done with the training and she's very good with what she does.

After marriage, I have told her that I'll assist in her business, I'm planning to get a bigger shop space for her and equip it with modern day machines, tools and tailoring materials goods to help make her work lucrative. I'm budgeting about 1.2-1.5m for this.

The issue now is that, 3 days ago, I asked her what her role would be if eventually after marriage she gets the shop, equipments and all, where she would come in in terms of responsibilities in the house. Her reply was she doesn't want to assume any responsibility and that it's my duty to cater for the family and she can only help & I shouldn't make anything compulsory for her. So many thoughts came through my mind. One of it was that, where the proceeds of her investment would be going to if I should shoulder all the responsibilities in the house knowing fully well that she makes money.

I rang my mum and told her of her response, I was shocked that she backed her saying that I shouldn't have asked her to foot anything in the house that it was my sole responsibility as a man to cater for my family my wife inclusive. My dad too, same thing. Even told my gf mum about it too , she giggled and said I shouldn't have asked her n that it's my duty to provide for my family. They all sounded foreign to me. Or am I the one not understanding?

My question now is, why invest that kind of money in her when I'm not sure of getting little or nothing in terms in return help to run the family. That sum of money could get me 4 brand new bikes and 2 neatly used Keke Napep for transportation business. I'm sure I'll be getting returns from these investment weekly or monthly basis.

I don't want who wouldn't have any sense of responsibility at home after investing in her, even if she's covering 10% or 5% I wouldn't mind. Mere helping doesn't go down well with me, she might have and decide not to give out. I rather not invest at all and expect nothing from her.

I don't know if I'm the one over thinking this things or my parent and her mum aren't seeing things from my perspective or am I being inconsiderate?

Criticism, Insults and bashing are welcomed. Thanks

Woah! Lol.

What part of Nigeria or Africa
are you and your folks from?

So women don't make even
small financial household
contributions in your ethnic
culture?


Your gut instinct is right though,
so invest in yourself first. She has
to do something however small
even if you are a Billionaire IMHO.


#Wake up!

RomanGreen:


Let me ask you, is she the type that buys you stuffs...expensive gifts or things according to her pocket....if yes then go ahead but if no then it's a huge red flag she will deal with your sorry ass when the land isn't green or when she is financially secured, better use that money for yourself.... A man shouldering responsibilities alone is what has sent many men yo their early grave due to HBP, stress and nagging from the woman.... Evaluate your options well, most ladies change for the worse when they get married except of course if she truly loves you.....again I feel you flaunted a lot of cash before her....check well man

Word!

jelel6:


Reading your opening piece, I think the way you presented your perspective may be the problem for her.

You come across as someone who's well to do and as a result, she thinks you should be responsible financially every step of the home front cause it's easy for you.

You said you asked her what her responsibilities would be, not where or how she can help. Responsibility means duty in this scenario for her and not filling-in when there's a need

Hence, she's highly unlikely to contribute to major recurring expenses like rent, school fees, feeding, cable, water, electricity, and medical procedures.

As a man, I personally would like to be able to handle all that myself no matter what. (circumstances permitting). I'm sure you intend to yourself.

I'll tell you an open secret, your mom, her mom, my own mom, and the majority of the women out there purchase almost everything needed to run the kitchen themselves. Except the budget for food, the women who earn something would contribute most of the things that prepares a meal. Maybe not at the very beginning of the marriage, but with time they'll shoulder the majority because everybody wants to be responsible for something. And they'll buy all the little things that the kids need without the husband knowing.

If you sense she won't do any of the above then I'm afraid she's immature about what constitutes marriage. Like the one that'll ask you to buy toothpaste and body cream for the family while she earns.

Because I don't expect that you'll spill water on the floor and wait for her to come home before it'd be taken care of.

Modified: just to emphasize, you don't have to invest in her business before you can expect her to help any way she can financially. That's why common SENSE is the most important thing to look for in any human being. People who are too set in their ways and beliefs don't see the bigger picture.

Well said!

Anoymus:

1. I just support her the little way I can. I never paid her school fees while she was in school I just gave her pocket money not more than 10k and it happens only once every 1-2 months

2. They dread their dad so much cos he is a retired soldier, the fear also rubbed on me on the long run. he just knows me as his daughter's friend. We haven't got that opportunity to discuss intimately yet. Her mum na my padi, I speak to her freely. Unlike her dad

3. I'm not sure. I think they should be responsible for all their own finances. More reason why I'm asking questions, make I no go marry person wey go dey carry money dash their people while I expenses go dey choke me.

4. No sir, she isn't. I am also a graduate, and was fortunate to venture into a booming business after graduation in 2014. I'm also not ugly or
handicapped in anyway (I'm sorry if you are a handicap reading this, this is not to spite you in anyway) she's certainly not doing me a favour being in the relationship.

#2. Cracked me up.

Anoymus:
I have a girlfriend I am meaning to propose to during the festive period, she's everything I want in a woman except few exception which might be a hindrance to the proposal.
Gist is, my babe is a graduate but lack of work made her to learn fashion designing, she's done with the training and she's very good with what she does.

After marriage, I have told her that I'll assist in her business, I'm planning to get a bigger shop space for her and equip it with modern day machines, tools and tailoring materials goods to help make her work lucrative. I'm budgeting about 1.2-1.5m for this.

The issue now is that, 3 days ago, I asked her what her role would be if eventually after marriage she gets the shop, equipments and all, where she would come in in terms of responsibilities in the house. Her reply was she doesn't want to assume any responsibility and that it's my duty to cater for the family and she can only help & I shouldn't make anything compulsory for her. So many thoughts came through my mind. One of it was that, where the proceeds of her investment would be going to if I should shoulder all the responsibilities in the house knowing fully well that she makes money.

I rang my mum and told her of her response, I was shocked that she backed her saying that I shouldn't have asked her to foot anything in the house that it was my sole responsibility as a man to cater for my family my wife inclusive. My dad too, same thing. Even told my gf mum about it too , she giggled and said I shouldn't have asked her n that it's my duty to provide for my family. They all sounded foreign to me. Or am I the one not understanding?

My question now is, why invest that kind of money in her when I'm not sure of getting little or nothing in terms in return help to run the family. That sum of money could get me 4 brand new bikes and 2 neatly used Keke Napep for transportation business. I'm sure I'll be getting returns from these investment weekly or monthly basis.

I don't want who wouldn't have any sense of responsibility at home after investing in her, even if she's covering 10% or 5% I wouldn't mind. Mere helping doesn't go down well with me, she might have and decide not to give out. I rather not invest at all and expect nothing from her.

I don't know if I'm the one over thinking this things or my parent and her mum aren't seeing things from my perspective or am I being inconsiderate?

Criticism, Insults and bashing are welcomed. Thanks

you're thinking well,as you see the red flag of a liability,just know how you'll Japa stylishly no time

Boxer007:



Hello sweetcunt. I like sweetcunt & I dont wanto be gay no more. I like to enjoy u. Please can I no u please?

She hasn't been online in close to 365 daiz sir.. shey you wee nuh go back to sucking preeqz Bai?

Selfish response from her, shows the mindset.