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What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? - Family (8) - Nairaland

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Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by DeeMain(m): 10:26am On Oct 24, 2021
Streamz:


Damnnn, I posted shiiit like this some weeks ago.

How did it pan out for you?
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Hathor5(f): 10:27am On Oct 24, 2021
kkins25:
grin grin grin grin
with the army of prayer warriors going for night vigils in search of husbands? if Doctors advised her to remain single, then i guess its probably because her eggs are loosing viability and fast. Unfortunate, that some get lost in the career pursuit. Capitalism is yhe wombs devil.

Your point is?
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by MarketDispatch: 10:27am On Oct 24, 2021
pocohantas:



I am 43. Not me.




No need for that. Menopause came early.

Have you tried or just gave up?

One lady i know just got preggers at 47
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by kliverpool(m): 10:27am On Oct 24, 2021
Get a man and have your baby before it is too late.
I know plenty women in your position,and i know what they are going through.
It is always a different story if you are single and have a child or two.

No matter how you look at it ,its better than not having husband and no child .
Act fast ,all the best .
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Enimoney3: 10:29am On Oct 24, 2021
Relocate, you might find someone who will make your dream come true

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by kkins25(m): 10:29am On Oct 24, 2021
Kobojunkie:
How can they be happy when they were raised by parents like yours to believe they need to have a man in their lives to complete them in some way? undecided

Jesus Christ taught us that God Almighty made created some - male and female alike - Eunuchs from birth, some become Eunuchs in life and others chose to become Eunuchs for the sake of the Kingdom of God - Matthew 19 vs 5 - 15 undecided

Sadly, some of those who were created Eunuchs are indoctrinated by ignorant parents into believing they are meant to marry and reproduce, setting their life into confusion from their very beginning. It is not mandatory to marry or have companions. This choice ought to be left to individuals to make on their own and in their own time. undecided

God made marital companionship a choice.... no one needs it to be happy,not even in old age. Those who don't have it can still be happy if they desire to be. And those who have it and are not happy can also choose to be happy regardless. undecided
I like how Paul tells his widowed or single and searching followers that they are probably meant to be eunuchs in life. If true then they didnt need to have a funtioning reproductive organ heH.
more so thats agaisnt the laws of biology, every individual should make sure that his genes are passed down. how else does one obtain imortality?
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by DaCharis2016: 10:29am On Oct 24, 2021
I advise u to go to @naijasingle on Instagram and search for guys in Nigeria for serious relationship. Don't disclose ur current location as yankee, it may work against ur goal as guys may look at u as a big and achieved lady. Use any Nigerian city as ur location if u are a Nigerian based abroad. I may even shoot my shot when I see such request that's not yankee-based challenging to an average Nigerian man. grin I bet if this strategy doesn't work, I will pay for the damages caused. grin grin grin grin

Don't even mind these doctors talks joor

You're even still younger

2 Likes

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Yankee101: 10:29am On Oct 24, 2021
Extract and preserve your eggs if you can afford it
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by We4all: 10:30am On Oct 24, 2021
revived:
Ohk


Dm Me I Go Fertilize You With Two

And I Will Take Responsibility For Them

But No Marriage

If Agreed Dm

Attractive offer but it has to be through insemination and the pregnancy should be carried by another woman.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by raphy(m): 10:30am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��

My sister dont worry just keep believing in love it will surely find you
Don't look at life as you are growing old just wakeup and thank God for life you will still give birth no matter what the doctor said some are trying nto make someone worry but God has the final say on your story I knw someone who couldn't give birth for many years after marriage but she give birth this year and she is dedicating the child in church on November 7.
Thts my cousin .
.so be hope ful
Happy Sunday smile Jesus love you .am also a single guy .in my 30s
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by yommen: 10:31am On Oct 24, 2021
Ow0eg0kudi:
Hmmmm @duyox2004
You asked a question and answered it yourself.
You are old (though not too old) and you're already feeling like this, so just imagine what you'll be like in 10/20/30 years from now.

Perspectives: some give advice based on evil intent, some based on their personal circumstances, and some will give you advice that thy feel will be the best for you BUT the ultimate decision is ALWAYS yours to make.

Àmọ̀ràn: You can choose to marry before this year runs out because there are men waiting to marry your type - full yankee babe spec with better fonee - and will worship at your nether altar for the rest of their lives BUT are you willing and ready to marry such?

The ball is in someone's court...

A kú ojúmọ́...ẹ dẹ̀ kú ìsinmi, ẹ̀mí a ṣe ọ̀pọ rẹ̀

Well, I am interested if she won't feel I'm below her standard. I clocked 40 this month, more than ready.

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Angelacruz: 10:32am On Oct 24, 2021
Mma,wat if u adopt a child?? Wont be bad
pocohantas:


Isn’t that the standard? Blame everyone but yourself?

That is why I will continue to commend Linda Ikeji for having that boy. She did what a right thinking woman should do. Not taking postinor 2 at 38.

If you want a child and you can cater for that child, by all means have that child. Even small girls of 21 are having their babies. Then a grown financially independent woman in her late 30s is somewhere asking “hope you didn’t cum inside”. undecided undecided

People must talk. When they are done talking, they will move on. With time they’ll appreciate the decision you took years ago.



I am 43. Not me.




No need for that. Menopause came early.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Spherical77(m): 10:32am On Oct 24, 2021
Foodempire:


I asked my wife to inform her sister to go get pregnant because her time was ticking fast, 45 now,she said God forbid, she's waiting for a proper marriage. Though marriage came her way much later but she's finding it hard to conceive, now she wishes she had gotten a child to console her than the husband, because the man only came for the money and do not bothered about their childlessness, he's so useless that he's never work from the inception of the marriage.

Most men that marry single ladies in their forties are only in the marriage for some benefits sort of
please tell her to adopt as fast as possible. That man is likely to leave her at the end

There are useless Men like that
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by obowunmi(m): 10:32am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��

Many Nigerian women use Black Magic and Blood covenant to hook men. Why don’t you try that option

You can turn your potential man into a mumu.

I know at least 25 women who used Black magic to marry their Nigerian men.

Also, LEAVE Nigerian men alone and date Men from other parts of the world.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by mysticgal(f): 10:32am On Oct 24, 2021
Ghoxt:


It's a repost from Quora, don't sweat it.
Don’t mind him
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Tayosteve(m): 10:34am On Oct 24, 2021
nairabacks:
[s][/s]

It's good to read before concluding grin

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by confydoedowaye(m): 10:34am On Oct 24, 2021
Hmmmm @duyox2004
You asked a question and answered it yourself.
You are old (though not too old) and you're already feeling like this, so just imagine what you'll be like in 10/20/30 years from now.

Perspectives: some give advice based on evil intent, some based on their personal circumstances, and some will give you advice that thy feel will be the best for you BUT the ultimate decision is ALWAYS yours to make.

Àmọ̀ràn: You can choose to marry before this year runs out because there are men waiting to marry your type - full yankee babe spec with better fonee - and will worship at your nether altar for the rest of their lives BUT are you willing and ready to marry such?

The ball is in someone's court...
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by kkins25(m): 10:34am On Oct 24, 2021
Hathor5:


Your point is?
there are plenty women in her shoes. might not be a made up story.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Zeinymira(f): 10:35am On Oct 24, 2021
A woman should always work with her biological clock, that's the honest truth and we've to be very realistic. Once you're 20, be intentional about every of your relationships. Don't date for fun, date who you can marry; someone that is acceptable to you and your folks. And incase fate is unkind, you're already 35+ and no man, go the second wife or third wife route. Because from age 30, your fertility is declining.

3 Likes

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by MarketDispatch: 10:36am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��

This is just a copy and paste posts by a guy called Peter.
The poster of the article is not female.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by TuFab(f): 10:38am On Oct 24, 2021
Anyahuruagu:
I actually discussed this with my folks the other time.

The single lifestyle of our generation affects the female gender more than the male gender.

When you age you will understand that the most important aspect of marriage is actually companionship, sex is while you are younger but as you age.

You need a confidant, a partner no matter how hard it is you need someone.

To our single women out there, please use the opportunity now.

I have met plenty aged single women, i must confess that 85% of them aren't happy with their life.

You're very very very wrong on this.
Well, it shows how myopic and shallow your thinking is though, so I can't blame you.
If not you would know that happiness is a very personal and intentional choice which isn't dependent solely on external factors.
There are numerous married people who are worse than miserable while there are equal number of single people who are genuinely happy.
The truth is, as a human, if you're waiting for a husband, wife or kids to make you happy, then you're on a long thing, because if you're not a happy person without them, even with them you'll continue to be joyless all your life, it's that simple!
That why I wonder why some ttc women bother themselves so much to the point of depression.
If they knew the stress (financial, emotional, psychological etc) and pain that comes with childbirth and care, if not fully prepared for, you would wish to remain childless.
Don't get me wrong, children are great to have, but if not well prepared for, the misery is worse than being childless.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Freeman85(m): 10:40am On Oct 24, 2021
Sorry dear
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Dada4me: 10:40am On Oct 24, 2021
The counsel to avoid teenage pregnancy is not the cause of your woes, teenage pregnancy couldn't have given you the happiness you seek. I advice you don't regret taking to the advice.

You missed it somewhere probably because you did not align with God, you kept fornicating in the name of dating.

It's not too late.

Start a relationship with God by repenting of your past deeds and accept Jesus as your Lord and saviour. God can and will fix your life.

Invite me to your wedding that will take place soon.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by humilitypays(m): 10:41am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��
In life, destiny is real no matter what we do. We can do little or nothing to change our destiny.


No matter how hard we try, some people will never get married not because they are bad, but because it is their destiny.


You can still freeze your remaining eggs or use surrogate or go the adoption route, what's important is make sure you fulfill your destiny here on earth before you depart by making impact, helping lives, lifting souls, changing lives with whatever little you have and be at peace with your inner being.


With social media, internet, and more economic hardship due to population explode, more people will end up single for life, that's the saddest reality.



Many young men are shying away from marriage due to financial lack, the ladies aren't helping matters by placing high priority on financial buoyancy as prerequisite for an eligible bachelor, many guys are going into crime hence more will end up in prison for life, terrorism is wasting so many able men, thereby reducing the population of men who would have married our beautiful ladies.


So the factors against marriage today are huge.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by jaxxy(m): 10:43am On Oct 24, 2021
Narldon:




Mr Peter Ademiju, when did you start laying eggs?

Pathetic TroLL!

Lol u mean like a chicken lays eggs?? grin undecided

Whichever the case this is a story that has affected a lot of women and it probably needs to be addressed.

They say a stitch in time saves nine!

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by studentwriter(m): 10:43am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��
if you're interested in marrying a man who needs no kids and would accept you the way you are
What he wants is just a life long commitment and partnership to curb his loneliness then send me a PM.
You both can adopt kids though it's fine by him

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by hush15: 10:43am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��

My advice for you is quite simple. Be kind, be good, be humble and most importantly, be God-fearing. The right man will surely come. Just be open and be right. About pregnancy, just believe it will happen for you. Afterall, apart from Sarah that we all read in the Bible, there recent testimonies of women who still had their babies even when many, including themselves had gone from menopause to menostop but God said, no and that theirs is menocontinue. Never loose your hope and faith in God cos with Him, all things are possible.

But going back to marriage and companionship, that's entirely up to you and your character. Mould yourself right, be done with all those feminism stop, embrace humility and submission. Be ready to do your part. I am not saying it will be easy but I can bet you it will be worth it cos I know no man finds a good woman as portrayed in proverbs 31, and will never hold on to her or sing her praise but don't let that praise change who you ought o be.

Lastly, which I don't really don't talk about because many misunderstand this but salient truth is women must learn to share. Yes, women must learn to share with other women their men. Many tend to disagree or outright condemn this but honestly, I don't see anywhere in God's word that is against sharing. Many don't understand how this helps so much if we walk from the position of love, obedience and fear of God and now, when I begin to expound on that, it will be endless but know this, if you can do without marrying, there is nothing wrong about it. It's a choice and you can still live a fulfilled life making positive impacts on others, especially children. There are so many children who don't have someone to call their own, you can become their own and as long as you are a good woman, you will be fine with them. If that's not what you want and you wish to have your own family, there is nothing wrong with it. Just be patient and still mould yourself right, if you do that, your man will come and you will have your children and you will be able to impact your family with your wonderful character in amazing and God fearing ways that will have a ripple effect on their own world but then again, should you find yourself in a position of sharing your man, don't be afraid either. As long you Building yourself right, you still live a fulfilled live that speaks your name till end of time.

Hope I make sense.

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Raalsalghul: 10:45am On Oct 24, 2021
Zeinymira:
A woman should always work with her biological clock, that's the honest truth and we've to be very realistic. Once you're 20, be intentional about every of your relationships. Don't date for fun, date who you can marry; someone that is acceptable to you and your folks. And incase fate is unkind, you're already 35+ and no man, go the second wife or third wife route. Because from age 30, your fertility is declining.

But seriously, how does this work? That a woman will get to a certain age and become desperate for marriage.

Reason I'm asking is because of the plethora of men vying for her attention in her youth.

I mean even if she doesn't see her type/spec/standard of man, then there must be something closer: "that is if she's interested in marriage oh".

Honestly, I find this hard to believe.

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Freeman85(m): 10:45am On Oct 24, 2021
I think you don't get it.
Kobojunkie:
How can they be happy when they were raised by parents like yours to believe they need to have a man in their lives to complete them in some way? undecided

Jesus Christ taught us that God Almighty made created some - male and female alike - Eunuchs from birth, some become Eunuchs in life and others chose to become Eunuchs for the sake of the Kingdom of God - Matthew 19 vs 5 - 15 undecided

Sadly, some of those who were created Eunuchs are indoctrinated by ignorant parents into believing they are meant to marry and reproduce, setting their life into confusion from their very beginning. It is not mandatory to marry or have companions. This choice ought to be left to individuals to make on their own and in their own time. undecided

God made marital companionship a choice.... no one needs it to be happy,not even in old age. Those who don't have it can still be happy if they desire to be. And those who have it and are not happy can also choose to be happy regardless. undecided
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by MeghaneMorgane(f): 10:46am On Oct 24, 2021
Anyahuruagu:
I actually discussed this with my folks the other time.

The single lifestyle of our generation affects the female gender more than the male gender.

When you age you will understand that the most important aspect of marriage is actually companionship, sex is while you are younger but as you age.

You need a confidant, a partner no matter how hard it is you need someone.

To our single women out there, please use the opportunity now.

I have met plenty aged single women, i must confess that 85% of them aren't happy with their life.

This is exactly the problem I had some months back. Relationship to me is more than sex. Sex is just an additional benefit. Relationship to me is having a companion and someone on my side.

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Nobody: 10:47am On Oct 24, 2021
pocohantas:


There have never been a single misconception of African men marrying early. Definitely not Nigerian men.
Hmmmm! I should have explained better. Your statement is actually true.

See eh, 36 years is becoming an early age for men now to get married. And really 45 years is also becoming not a big issue again. More men are becoming comfortable staying single till 50. So, I was not even thinking about 23 to 28 years for men. That one is already premature or dad/mom is super rich, and easily set up the kids getting married.

Now, the misconception I was really talking about is for Nigerian men abroad (I forgot to say this). And for the fact she mentioned Houston, that was the reason I got carried away.

Most Nigerian men get married as soon as they leave Nigeria. I think only students take their time to finish school before hooking up. And more 20s leave Nigeria. So, they always get married fast. The ones that lady talked about are divorced on paper (or those born there).

I kinda target women with abroad experience when I wrote that there is misconception that Nigerian men get married early. To girls western girls, Nigerian men get married early. But they dont know that we really dont cos the economy is bad. There are more men these days in their 40s still living with their parents or in their family houses where they pay no rent.

Cc: duyox2004

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by captainking(m): 10:48am On Oct 24, 2021
omoharry:
This write up was copied from Quora (an America site) this op just went to copy and pasted it here just to bash single women . It was written by an American.
Oh. Wow.. I did not know that.
It doesn't make sense shaa. .
The lady in question would meet a man that would adore her. No doubt bout that

2 Likes

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