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What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? - Family (10) - Nairaland

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Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by ufotty2001: 11:22am On Oct 24, 2021
My advice for you is that get a decent man. Good in character! Get pregnant for him.. firstly don't let him know on till it get to 3-4months inform him.. if he says he will not carry on.. move on with your life don't disturb him or stress him.. just move on with your life.. !!
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by J2381: 11:25am On Oct 24, 2021
Hmmm. Well sh1t happens. I've often said it that people should live their life, not to the standard of any mother fvcking religion or traditional belief, but according to what makes you happy.

Life is short and full of fun. Live it, love it. If getting married or having kids out of wedlock is what you want, go right ahead, all people can do is talk. The amazing thing is they dare not talk in front of you. So live your life.

It's high time people get to know those standard set up by religion and tradition are mostly false.

You can have a good life without being married, having kids or even going to church or mosque.

So to the OP. it's never to late to start. "You're running out of eggs" isn't the same as you've ran out of eggs. So now is the time. Start having sex, lots of it if a kid is what you truly want. Best of luck.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Toks2008(m): 11:26am On Oct 24, 2021
pocohantas:


Toks zukwanuike!!! grin grin

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Toks2008(m): 11:27am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��


I just created a thread on this issue.

Check it out

https://www.nairaland.com/6817991/lady-late-30s-still-single

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by bjdon: 11:28am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��

You can freeze your eggs, or use a sperm donor.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Njaka: 11:31am On Oct 24, 2021
Can we talk, let's see how it goes
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Dhamio(m): 11:31am On Oct 24, 2021
Never give up...just grab any opportunity..dat comes ur way....pls...having a child is very important in life...u need a companion ....
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by topsam1(m): 11:34am On Oct 24, 2021
No mind am, na one oyinbo write am for quora, was expecting the posterto make reference to the original writerbut he'll no...
Ow0eg0kudi:
Hmmmm @duyox2004
You asked a question and answered it yourself.
You are old (though not too old) and you're already feeling like this, so just imagine what you'll be like in 10/20/30 years from now.

Perspectives: some give advice based on evil intent, some based on their personal circumstances, and some will give you advice that thy feel will be the best for you BUT the ultimate decision is ALWAYS yours to make.

Àmọ̀ràn: You can choose to marry before this year runs out because there are men waiting to marry your type - full yankee babe spec with better fonee - and will worship at your nether altar for the rest of their lives BUT are you willing and ready to marry such?

The ball is in someone's court...

A kú ojúmọ́...ẹ dẹ̀ kú ìsinmi, ẹ̀mí a ṣe ọ̀pọ rẹ̀
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by bluefilm: 11:35am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��

You sound like a man looking for ways to bash women today on Nairaland.

Nonsense. sad

1 Like

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Mcdubai: 11:38am On Oct 24, 2021
Hello sis, can we chat privately?
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by amNIGERIA: 11:43am On Oct 24, 2021
Life is about risk!

If you come back to Nigeria, you get many suitors, although for economic reasons tongue tongue.

Yes, for economic reasons many single Nigerian male will ask for your hand in marriage. Nigeria girls do it all the time, accept diaspora Nigeria men marriage proposal, for economic reasons

If ou make peace with this reality, then you can plan against heart break, that might come or not. Should the guy land in US and start acting like some Nigeria girls do when dey arrive US.


Additionally, have check all your male primary, secondary and tertiary schools classmate? From these pool, you might find someone looking for what you have to offer.

One good thing with these group, is that you know them when they are un-polluted by the World and they know you.





duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Spherical77(m): 11:49am On Oct 24, 2021
brownemmanuel43:

U hv said it all. 100% of them are not happy at all
And you think all married women are happy? Check within your family (nuclear & extended) neighbourhood et al, you'd see unhappy married women littered smiley
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Ojumisisire: 11:49am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��

Will you marry me?
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Zeinymira(f): 11:50am On Oct 24, 2021
Raalsalghul:


But seriously, how does this work? That a woman will get to a certain age and become desperate for marriage.

Reason I'm asking is because of the plethora of men vying for her attention in her youth.

I mean even if she doesn't see her type/spec/standard of man, then there must be something closer: "that is if she's interested in marriage oh".

Honestly, I find this hard to believe.

Not every lady has that, ok. But at the end of the day, if you're a woman interested in marriage and having kids, plan early with whatever options you have.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by MondayOsunbor(m): 11:54am On Oct 24, 2021
muderkid:
Saw this on Quora

yes i did too but it is really heart breaking
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by tctrills: 11:54am On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��
Stop blaming your parents and counselors. You are not the only woman with 2 degrees. Your mates that got married don't have 2 heads. Man don't want to marry you for a reason. So go fix yourself and stop blaming the world for your personal choices
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by icecool12(m): 11:55am On Oct 24, 2021
omooba969:


I understand your drift but everything is wrong with being a single mother or a single dad.

It's not in our nature to live in isolation neither are we built for such. You can ask the single parents to get the true picture of things.

Forgive my words, but fuch what society thinks. It is our “righteous” Nigerian mentality that has left a lot of people trapped in abusive marriages. I’ve seen lonely old people, and trust me, it’s a different kind of depression.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by icecool12(m): 11:56am On Oct 24, 2021
MeghaneMorgane:


Why didn’t she go and adopt. There are many children that need love in this world. If God blesses you to have yours, good for you. If not, go and adopt two or three kids to call your own instead of being miserable.

I don’t know for her o! Right now she can’t even do that because of financial constraints.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by koning: 11:58am On Oct 24, 2021
pocohantas:


Isn’t that the standard? Blame everyone but yourself?

That is why I will continue to commend Linda Ikeji for having that boy. She did what a right thinking woman should do. Not taking postinor 2 at 38.

If you want a child and you can cater for that child, by all means have that child. Even small girls of 21 are having their babies. Then a grown financially independent woman in her late 30s is somewhere asking “hope you didn’t cum inside”. undecided undecided

People must talk. When they are done talking, they will move on. With time they’ll appreciate the decision you took years ago.



I am 43. Not me.




No need for that. Menopause came early.



Most realistic, sensible and practical comment. If you are woman, 35yrs and above and financially stable, i really do not see why you would not allow a man you CHOSE to sleep with not to cum inside. That might be your last and only chance. Any man you choose to open your legs for is good enough for you and a potential baby daddy.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by adonis89(m): 12:00pm On Oct 24, 2021
Plz try and get a child if marriage isn't coming
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by samwillyco1(m): 12:00pm On Oct 24, 2021
Come make I marry you if you are serious
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by sixtus3606(m): 12:00pm On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��

Hi. Can I send you a private message?
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Nobody: 12:01pm On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��
Pele, it is well
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by samwillyco1(m): 12:01pm On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��

Come make I marry you if you are respectful and serious
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Bunmite1: 12:02pm On Oct 24, 2021
Can you send me your Email or your mobile number, which ever way let relate. God will help us
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by seyz91(m): 12:03pm On Oct 24, 2021
@ bolded

Then an elderly family woman told me something that forever shaped my view of things, she said and I quote " even the so called good ones, majority of them still cheat shocked shocked" if you judge male by cheating alone you will hate them all,

she said nothing but the truth

cheating on the male side not enough reason to end relationship cuz men cheats nonetheless
Kemight15:
Really complicated

I have an older cousin whose then fiancee cheated on, the lady was hell bent on ending the relationship, the guy apologize but my cousin was having none of that

All of a sudden, the guy met with my parents and the ladies parents, they intervened and advise my cousin to proceed with the marriage v cool shocked shocked my younger self was furious shocked shocked how can they not support ending things with a cheater

Then an elderly family woman told me something that forever shaped my view of things, she said and I quote " even the so called good ones, majority of them still cheat shocked shocked" if you judge male by cheating alone you will hate them all, including your brothers, nephews and I'll just exclude your father out of respect, haa big madam that's is too much, that's what my mum calls words that can scatter house infact this one can scatter the whole wide world, but this woman insist she said it and will say it again and again

Back to my cousin and her fiancee, they got married and as far as I know things have been going on very well between them, my aunt seems generally happy and accomplished and they've been leaving their life and moving on with their kids, the fiance turn husband is very caring to both wife and kid, doesn't smoke and not a troublesome flair

Up till now me myself I'm still confused, since then I don't usually trust popular/general opinion anymore but will rather look each and individual case

And what one person did and it went well another may try it and it will go bad and vice versa
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Bunmite1: 12:03pm On Oct 24, 2021
Connect me through this email kennybum6@yahoo.co.uk. thanks
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by MeeLan: 12:04pm On Oct 24, 2021
You need to first purge yourself of everything or help or lifestyle you think you are getting from whatsapp, insta and FB.
Date a guy, if he cheats, don't stop, nobody want to date a 41 year old and be playing virgin with her. He will reduce the act and maybe stop it as time goes on.
And as for you again, CALM DOWN, TIME NOR DEY AGAIN O
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by opecuddy(m): 12:05pm On Oct 24, 2021
Then lemme love you �
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by ultimateprof: 12:08pm On Oct 24, 2021
That is why I like Islam, you hardly see their girls enter mono-continue.
Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by Nobody: 12:09pm On Oct 24, 2021
pocohantas:


Isn’t that the standard? Blame everyone but yourself?

That is why I will continue to commend Linda Ikeji for having that boy. She did what a right thinking woman should do. Not taking postinor 2 at 38.

If you want a child and you can cater for that child, by all means have that child. Even small girls of 21 are having their babies. Then a grown financially independent woman in her late 30s is somewhere asking “hope you didn’t cum inside”. undecided undecided

People must talk. When they are done talking, they will move on. With time they’ll appreciate the decision you took years ago.



I am 43. Not me.




No need for that. Menopause came early.
my favourite moniker on this forum. Poco the Queen.

2 Likes

Re: What Is It Like To Grow Old And Never Be Married? by dejavuh0007(m): 12:13pm On Oct 24, 2021
duyox2004:
I hate it. I’m 41, never married, no kids.

I’ve been close…twice. But ended both relationships when they were caught cheating.

I’ve dated several men since then, most older than me, and they seemed to be in no hurry to even be in a committed relationship. Which is crazy to me that these men are mid-40s and still trying to hangout with the guys and party. I met a whole guy group of friends in Houston 2 years ago…all single, all 36–45 years old. They were throwing house parties during the quarantine…parties!! ��

When I was in grade school, I was told to get a degree, don’t get pregnant, just enjoy being single, make friends, keep dating, and the right man will find you.

Now that I have two degrees, traveled the world, developed hobbies, and avoided pregnancy…my doctors are telling me to just be a single mom because I’m running out of eggs as I type this message. �

I beat teenage pregnancy to be considering single motherhood at 41. �

Damn you, parents, counselors, pastors, and everyone who gave me that advice. I can’t get that time (or my eggs) back. I hate being single at this age!! ��

I'm 26 yrs, that's if u r interested in younger men. Whatsapp: +2348121618724

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