chaircover:

Many of us are forgetting one small detail which is that in our culture children are seen as gifts from God and also as a sign of fertility and prowess.

It is only now that we are beginning to see people gradually cutting down on the number of kids that they have.

Many of our parents had 4 or above while our generation on average have 2 kids.

Truth be told, many of these illiterates don't even know or have access to family planning.

To me, the sad picture that we saw on the first page is everyones responsibility;

The parents to cut down on the number of kids that they have, the Govt to provide jobs so that hard working and able men can work and bring money home without having to resort to child labour etc, the govt also has to provide family planning at grassroot level, and us as individuals to look out for the less privileged in the society and help them when we can. There is nothing wrong with us sponsoring a child or two through school and to pay our drivers and gardeners a decent wage and on time etc.

We all have a responsibility.

Yes Chaircover, you are absolutely right! God bless you for speaking the truth!

But my take is, our men are the culprit here - they should consider their circumstances carefully and tie their sausages very tight on their tighs so that they don't make another innocent child a victim of their own circumstance.  

Because, our culture gave women no rights over these things - we have no rights over our own bodies, to determine whether we want children or not and how many?  

It is the man that dictates the number of children his wife should have and society supports him in that (including women themselves - afterall, we are our worst enemies) and that's the trouble.  The contract is not in written form but it's implied, with pressure on women to submit and they usually do, that's why we are looking at these innocent little girls here, being abused by their own parents and society, abi?

What can a woman do when the Law and Culture are not on her side and she has no backbone of her own - no education, job, trade etc with which to challenge such evil ideas.  You see, risking someone else's life is better than risking your own, abi?  That's why women are pressed to undergo several childbirths, in their husbands quest for more children, they can not afford to feed, how foolish!

The men can only abuse, unfortunate illitrate and naive women and certainly, not someone like yourself and I and there's quite a few of us around you know - that's the worry!!

Theblessed:



But my take is, our men are the culprit here - they should consider their circumstances carefully and tie their sausages very tight on their tighs so that they don't make another innocent child a victim of their own circumstance.  Because, our culture gave women no rights over these things - we have no rights over our own bodies, to determine whether we want children or not and how many?  

Theblessed:


It is the man that dictates the number of children his wife should have and society supports him in that (including women themselves - afterall, we are our worst enemies) and that's the trouble.  The contract is not in written form but it's implied, with pressure on women to submit and they usually do, that's why we are looking at these innocent little girls here, being abused by their own parents and society, abi?

What can a woman do when the Law and Culture are not on her side and she has no backbone of her own - no education, job, trade etc with which to challenge such evil ideas.  You see, risking someone else's life is better than risking your own, abi?  That's why women are pressed to undergo several childbirths, in their husbands quest for more children, they can not afford to feed, how foolish!

The men can only abuse, unfortunate illitrate and naive women and certainly, not someone like yourself and I and there's quite a few of us around you know - that's the worry!!

aloy-emeka:


Are you sure you know Nigerian women very well?


Not in today's Nigeria. May be you are talking about Burkina Suffer.

rabzy:

There is little those kids can bring home to the family and they are way too young. But in our villages some these kids just carry those stuff to deliver to their mother's customers down the road or in the next street. I have not seen kids this small hawking in the streets of Lagos except accompanied by older siblings, and most times they just want to tag along and they cry if you don't take them. So their parents just put a miniature tray on their head ask them to follow their older siblings.

In some rural areas too, schools are so far away and ill-kept with no purpose in the teaching that it would equally be child abuse to send kids to such schools. In Nigeria the fact is, its not all school age kids that their parents can afford to send to school, its not all  kids that are interested in going to school and its not all places that schools are accessible.

i once had a family friend whose first son was always repeating classes and failing while his younger brother had passed him and was two years his senior. The father eventually asked him what he wants to do and the guy said he wants to be an 'eleran', a butcher. He dropped out of primary school and became a butcher. Before he graduated as a butcher or become independent, he had to hawk meat on the streets for his master, initially his master would be with him but later he was doing it himself. By the time he was 17, he was already an accomplished butcher. He could handle a cow and butcher it in minutes and that is what he lives on now. He already had a family long before i could think of talking to a girl.

Yeah, i believe we should all try as much as possible to reduce the number of kids we have. The government must have a policy of enlightenment and the campaign must be sustained. What shocks me most is that after seeing the struggle my parents did to raise us, my uncles also had numerous kids, the average was 7. My parents only had their standard 6 education, but all my uncles on both sides had more than that and they still were having 7, 8 kids.

Though they are not doing badly, their kids did not hawk like we did, they have built their own small house unlike us, but its a risk am not willing to take. Anything can happen in this country, there are no guarantees in this life. Just two days ago, i heard its like one of my uncles has been retrenched, in one of the airline servicing companies, though we have not confirmed it, he was their quality control manager and he was doing quite well financially, but what happens now and he still has little kids. Those ones can't even hawk if push comes to shove because they have lived a sheltered life.

Its wrong for the first child or the first kids to be working and taking care of their parents and also fending for the last ones. Its energy sapping and you can hardly plan your own life.

Guy, where did you get your common sense? 

Are there some left over, we could all share, on here?  Your mum raised a perfect gentleman, honest!  And, if you're not married, I envy the woman that would win your heart because, you'd make a perfect Husband and Son-Inlaw.

You think things through and, have so much empathy on others perhaps, due to the hardship you and your sibblings experienced growing up - what a man! You're considering and analysing every aspect of the issues - the implications of such irresponsible behaviour on the eldest children especially, the first and second child of the family who always bore the brunt of most sufferings in the family. 

They're usually, the first to be woken up early in the morning to go and fetch water or go sell akamu, akara and for those in the villages, join their mothers and fathers in the farm, before the sun rise - just pray, it wasn't the Harmatan season when you'd be shaking like a leaf in those your small pins! (Hey, childhood in Africa, we're analysing here remember?)

But, I want to know why we need so many people on earth? What we need, is it not to provide quality life, education, quantum love and affection for our children so that, they do not experience the hard life we endured, from our parents.

Now, considering the picture you painted above and with the level of education you had, I'm sure that experience thought you one thing or two about life.  You don't seem like someone who would embrace 6/7 children like them or, would you?

Well, they say, 'experience is the best teacher' and I must inform, all young members of our family have learnt from our parents experiences and, I hope others do too, as there's so many people in the world today, with very little resources left to support us all soon, we'll all be eating each other for food, when there's not enough food, to go round. 

Hope, everyone remembered what happened 2 year ago, when Rice was scarce in the World Market - that's just a tip of the iceberg of what's yet to come?