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Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? - Romance - Nairaland

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Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by blacknight(m): 10:51am On Mar 03, 2006
Why do Nigerian ladies lay much emphasis on age when it comes to relationship? I'm in love with a lady,but she said we can't go out because she is older than me.so i want to know if age is really important in a relationship.
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Thagodfada(m): 3:49pm On Mar 03, 2006
well to tell you the truth, i used to think it wasn't but i found out a few months ago that it is.

For Nigerian women, age is a huge thing. Some of them would not want to date anyone younger. Plus the fact that it has been shown that women develop much more faster emotionally than men. So if a woman is dating a guy 3-5yrs older than her, they are probably at the same stage emotional maturity.
So if a girl is going out with a much younger guy, she has the advantage of being more emotionally matured.

But i think all that is bullcrap. People should be able to date regardless of age. But a guy should only marry a girl younger than he is. Word to the wise grin
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by chrisd(m): 7:49pm On Mar 03, 2006
All my women have been older and taller than me. And bed them no problem.
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by diyobdw(f): 7:56pm On Mar 03, 2006
blacknight:

Why do Nigerian ladies lay much emphasis on age when it comes to relationship? I'm in love with a lady,but she said we can't go out because she is older than me.so i want to know if age is really important in a relationship.
It simple!!!
She doesnt love you enough to absorb wot the society will say.
I would date a boy younger( not more than 2yrs sha!)But i wont marry someone a year younger!! i
it in the culture, undecided We av been nutured to believe that. sad it goes back to the african ego thingy!! tongue
if he is younger how will he be the head!!
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by chrisd(m): 8:10pm On Mar 03, 2006
shown that women develop much more faster emotionally than men. So if a woman is dating a boy 3-5yrs older than her, they are probably at the same stage emotional maturity.
So if a girl is going out with a much younger boy, she has the advantage of being more emotionally matured.

Or perhaps too much emotional maturity makes her cry all the time. Never understood what it means to be emotionally matured.

Steps to Emotional Maturity

1. Eliminate Magical Thinking (Impossible if she is pentecostal/charismatic)
2. Learn to Tolerate Your Anxiety (Women are always anxious about everything)
3. Learn to Recognize and Appropriately Express Your Anger (Especially if you see him kiss another girl)
4. Learn to Cope With Pain and Hurt (He going out with his friends only and does not invite you)
5. Facing Your Guilty Feelings (Having that chocolate or icecream which you know you should not have ate)
6. Learn to Live With Your Failures (Not ever getting that sexy boy)
7. Put Your Feelings in Perspective (Cannot happen since women usually cry a lot)

So you see, women can never be Emotional Mature.
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by chrisd(m): 8:12pm On Mar 03, 2006
Fidel Castro was 26 when he started the Cuban revolution. So I think a truly great man can outwit any woman whatever her age. Especially if he is a lawyer or surgeon. grin

1 Like

Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Seun(m): 12:36pm On Mar 04, 2006
According to chrisd, an emotionally mature woman is one who takes a lot of rubbish from her boyfriend without complaining. It is better for a woman to be single forever than to be with a man who expects her not to complain when he goes about kissing and sleeping with other girls, ignoring her feelings, putting his friends ahead of her, et cetera.
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by smartsoft(m): 12:40pm On Mar 04, 2006
Well to me Age is notting but number as many ppl do say, it all depends on your mature reponse and your thinking faculty.!
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by henchyk(m): 5:30pm On Mar 04, 2006
Say whatever you want to say, the most important factor in a relationship is Age. Followed by the bucks.
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by chinani(f): 9:08pm On Mar 05, 2006
i agree w/ many of the replies. my opinoin? well, AGE IS A FACTOR in so much as IT INDICATES EMOTIONAL, PSYCHOLOGICAL and physical MATURITY.

believe it or not, but women try their hardest to meet men where they stand. & when you love it's important to take the good w/ the bad (though only to a certain extent).

situations mature people. LIFE MATURES PEOPLE. but if the man is not mature to a certain degree at the beginning of the relationship than he will only "go so far" so to speak. (same goes for women.) this means, a man might not be mature enough to balance a relationship, family, school and/or a job. one of these things might be neglected. or the stress might lead him astray ---> to cheat or dropout or underachieve.

also, many relationships end b/c men do not understand women, in general or as individuals. many young men STILL believe that women are to be scoffed at and ridiculed for their differences w/ men. ***chrisd, anyone?*** [/i]until a man can understand that a woman is her own "species" so to speak, w/ reactions/thoughts/feelings/inclinations /dreams that may not necessarily match your(his) own ----> until then man isnt all that mature. (i mean i'm just getting there w/ men & i'm a smart cookie! grin)

if the woman is your friend than it is b/c she cares for you that she is being so honest.

i mean, wouldnt you rather have a [i]friend
than an ex-girlfriend anyday?
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by manmustwac(m): 12:52am On Jun 08, 2008
age is an factor in relationships in nigeria its very rare for a woman to amrry a man that seniors her but its a common thing here in Europe. And since the man is the head of the house he should me older therefore wiser than his female counterpart
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Nobody: 12:54am On Jun 08, 2008
i guess
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by beauteous(f): 12:56am On Jun 08, 2008
yep
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Xerxes4(m): 12:59am On Jun 08, 2008
Age is not important. It depends on the individual

Blimey. . . . .there are 22 year-olds that are smarter and more matured than 38 year-olds. . . . .
The single most important factor is the chemistry. . . .Age is not important at all. . . It's just a number.
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Nobody: 1:06am On Jun 08, 2008
Yes it is important to me. . .chemistry buries itself as soon as I know you're younger than I am.
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Nobody: 1:09am On Jun 08, 2008
stillwater:

Yes it is important to me. . .chemistry buries itself as soon as I know you're younger than I am.
lol same
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Xerxes4(m): 1:11am On Jun 08, 2008
These women don't even apply real life scenarios to simple topics like this.

Still, a guy is asking u out and he lied about his age in the beginning. . . .
U began dating him and after few years, he fesses up that he is actually 3 years younger than you.
What will u do? Throw him out of the house?
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by 4Him1(m): 1:12am On Jun 08, 2008
stillwater:

Yes it is important to me. . .chemistry buries itself as soon as I know you're younger than I am.

what a heart rending blow to me. sad
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Nobody: 1:13am On Jun 08, 2008
~Xerxes~:

These women don't even apply real life scenarios to simple topics like this.

Still, a guy is asking u out and he lied about his age in the beginning. . . .
You began dating him and after few years, he fesses up that he is actually 3 years younger than you.
What will u do? Throw him out of the house?
well if he can't even tell me the simple truth. . . . undecided
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Xerxes4(m): 1:15am On Jun 08, 2008
ibkaye:

well if he can't even tell me the simple truth. . . . undecided

What if he confesses after the wedding? U will get a divorce?
Y'all gurls like to pretend. . . . . . Does age matter after a long time in a relationship?
The answer is a freaking NO!!!!
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by 4Him1(m): 1:16am On Jun 08, 2008
ibk has a valid point, if he could keep such a fundamental lie for so long only God knows what else he has up his sleeves that he's not come clean on.
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Nobody: 1:17am On Jun 08, 2008
~Xerxes~:

What if he confesses after the wedding? You will get a divorce?
Y'all girls like to pretend. . . . . . Does age matter after a long time in a relationship?
The answer is a freaking NO!!!!
why would he lie to someone he loves? to me, not only does age matter in a relationship, but also trust

4 Him:

ibk has a valid point, if he could keep such a fundamental lie for so long only God knows what else he has up his sleeves that he's not come clean on.
exactly
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Nobody: 1:20am On Jun 08, 2008
~Xerxes~:

These women don't even apply real life scenarios to simple topics like this.

Still, a guy is asking u out and he lied about his age in the beginning. . . .
You began dating him and after few years, he fesses up that he is actually 3 years younger than you.
What will u do? Throw him out of the house?

Why should he lie about his age? That just screams immaturity and deceit which gives me enough reason to kick his butt to the curb.

4 Him:

what a heart rending blow to me. sad

Are you still in your teens or what? shocked
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Xerxes4(m): 1:20am On Jun 08, 2008
ibkaye:

why would he lie to someone he loves? to me, not only does age matter in a relationship, but also trust

That answer is simple. . . . .
He lied because he wanted u so much and he knew his age disqualifies him in the first place.
Naturally, he had to lie just like guys lie over material stuffs and girls like over the number of their exes/virginity.
What will a woman do after sleeping with a guy younger than u for 3 years? U quit and stop loving him cos he is younger?
Blimey. . . . .Nairaland is a land of Philistines.

1 Like

Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Nobody: 1:23am On Jun 08, 2008
~Xerxes~:

That answer is simple. . . . .
He lied because he wanted u so much and he knew his age disqualifies him in the first place.
Naturally, he had to lie just like guys lie over material stuffs and girls like over the number of their exes/virginity.
What will a woman do after sleeping with a guy younger than u for 3 years? You quit and stop loving him because he is younger?
Blimey. . . . .Nairaland is a land of Philistines.

All I can say is you don't lie to me period!!!!!! wink
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Nobody: 1:24am On Jun 08, 2008
stillwater:

All I can say is you don't lie to me period!!!!!! wink
I agree grin
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Xerxes4(m): 1:26am On Jun 08, 2008
stillwater:

All I can say is you don't lie to me period!!!!!! wink

And if he does and u find out after ur wedding, would u kick him to the curb?
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Nobody: 1:28am On Jun 08, 2008
~Xerxes~:

And if he does and u find out after your wedding, would u kick him to the curb?
Isn't one of the things needed for a marriage 'trust', that would be so immature of the guy, lying about your age during a normal relationship is bad enough but marriage? Jeez, what kind of marriage is that embarassed
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by 4Him1(m): 1:33am On Jun 08, 2008
~Xerxes~:

Blimey. . . . .Nairaland is a land of Philistines.

easy there! We dont want the "palestinians" coming to claim it tomorrow. grin

stillwater:

Are you still in your teens or what? shocked

you didnt know? smiley
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Xerxes4(m): 1:35am On Jun 08, 2008
ibkaye:

Isn't one of the things needed for a marriage 'trust', that would be so immature of the guy, lying about your age during a normal relationship is bad enough but marriage? Jeez, what kind of marriage is that embarassed

Answer the question and ignore what kind of marriage it is.
The question is would u walk out of a marriage because u belatedly found out the guy lied about his age?
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by Nobody: 1:37am On Jun 08, 2008
~Xerxes~:

And if he does and u find out after your wedding, would u kick him to the curb?

I don't know.

4 Him:

you didnt know? smiley

And I've been talking about lipsticks all this while. Oh gosh I've spoilt you shocked Liarrrr!!! You're in your twenties tongue
Re: Is Age Really Important In A Relationship? by 4Him1(m): 1:38am On Jun 08, 2008
stillwater:

And I've been talking about lipsticks all this while. Oh gosh I've spoilt you shocked Liarrrr!!! You're in your twenties tongue

hehe grin i may be 19 for all you know.

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