The Journey Of A Monk - Romance - Nairaland
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / The Journey Of A Monk (5343 Views)
The Nun And The Monk Who Fell In Love And Married / Why I Decided To Stay A Monk Forever / Gay Buddhist Monk Having Drug Gay S.ex With Monks In Temple, Leaked On Facebook (2) (3) (4)
(1) (2) (3) (4) (Reply) (Go Down)
| The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:21pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
In a tenuous battle against my flesh, I went through 170 days—5 months and a half—without sex, põrn and mastürbation. I was tired of being a degenerate lust-controlled põrn addict and aspired to be greater. For this, I needed to conquer my lust like a warrior on a battlefield. I decided to go 365 days without sex, porn, and masturbation, and from there carry on as a man in control of his life. During the journey, I maintained a small journal in which I reflected on the battle. I decided to share it with you today. All text in Arial font that follows is from the journal. I hope that other warriors can get a thing or two from it. Besides, I would be more than grateful to receive the wisdom and insights from more experienced warriors. 6 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:23pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
I keep falling Will I ever stand? Is it possible to get out? Please, help me… Help… I wrote this before I started my 170 day streak. I kept relapsing and relapsing and thought I could never break out of the pörn loop. I was in a very sad place in life and was at one of my weakest, if not my weakest, point ever. 4 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:25pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
I want to get out. I try, but fall every time. But I think that writing affirmations like the one I wrote on Nairaland might help. So here is my affirmation: I am *****, grandson of *****, great grandson of *****. I am currently a degenerate porn addict. But I am fighting! It is a fierce battle against myself and the world. And I do not intend to lose it. This world bombards us with lust triggers. From the media becoming pornofied and women becoming porn stars online and offline, everything is being sexualized at an uncontrollable and worrying rate. This makes it exponentially much harder for a man to control his lust and sexual urges. So, as never seen before, the vast majority of them indulge in porn and masturbation. The last barrier against this degeneration of the man (or the human) is his inner self. That is, the fabric and substance of his mind and spirit. So, the man must forge his mind and nurture his spirit to escape the tornado of degeneracy this world is caught into. 6 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:25pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
Why do we do what we do? I observe that I do things for attention. Any ambition that I have in mind, I envision myself being seen by people. Especially women. Why am I like that? I need to write it down. 4 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:28pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
I am on my seven day no-fap, no-pörn, no-sex streak. It is very hard to not indulge in lust. I want to fück so bad. I want to take a woman and stroke my pènis into her vagina. But I know deep down that these thoughts are not constructive with respect to my life and my heart. I had finally crossed the one-week bar here. I was extremely hard but harder was the journey ahead. PS: I apologize for being graphic. When I wrote in my journal I did not think of sharing it publicly one day. 5 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:31pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
Doing things for women. Lust is very powerful. I imagine myself fücking all the time. Why is it like that? I imagine myself doing things in front of women so that it can impress them and get their vaginas wet. Thus, making it easier for me to quench my lust on them. I know these thoughts are not good. Here “good” means having a desired effect on my heart and my life. I am thirsty. I am very thirsty as I write this. I can watch pörn and masturbate to quench my thirst. But I refuse to. For many reasons. First, it is highly demeaning. Let’s think about what is truly happening here. A man that watches porn is a man that is looking at another man fücking a woman he wants to fück. Pause for a moment and think about it. This is very disgraceful to your honor and masculinity. How low did you get to the point that you resort to watching another man fück a woman. Suppose the man in question was someone you know. Say, your friend, your coworker, a family member, or a neighbor. Now, would you ever sit down and mastürbate to your friend having intercourse with a woman who you want to fück? Don’t you think that places you below him? Don’t you think that’s humiliating? Second, it is very draining. Porn takes your sexual and spiritual energy. Third, it has science-proven physiological negative effects. Fourth, it can mess up your sexuality. In a pörn movie you are watching the both the woman and the man, both the vagina and the pénis, both the woman’s ass and the man’s ass. You are hearing the moans of the woman as well as those of the man. Fifth, it messes up your interactions with people. You carry that energy with you. Plus, you start to look at people in a strange way. Sixth, it strips you of your potential. Seventh, you don’t want to be addicted to anything in life. Eighth, it just shows that you are weak. It takes real strength to not follow one’s carnal desires. 9 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:32pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
What do I do then? What do I do about this lust and this pent-up sexual rage? I want to ravage a woman’s insides. I want to make love to her. But, I don’t have a woman. There is most likely zero woman around here that would do it for me. (Even though most of them are just as hôrny, if not more.) So, I am left on my own. I don’t want to watch porn and masturbate for the several aforementioned reasons; and I don’t have a woman to fück with. What am I supposed to do about my body that is raging to fück? This may be seen as a good opportunity to learn to control my mind and caliber my lust. Since I do not have a woman around, it would be opportune to learn to manage my lust without a woman. This way, when I’ll be in a relationship, a woman won’t be able to manipulate me with her vagina. I would already be used to getting none. I would already know how to deal with raging lust. Many women close their legs hoping that this will force their man to bend over and do what they want. This can’t work on a man that has sexual discipline. And right now, I am in a situation where I can (and should) build an unwavering and deep sexual discipline. That would substantially help me in my life, and so in several aspects: with women, with finances, in society, and with myself. I will hardly have a more opportune period in my life to develop and solidify my sexual discipline. Yes, this is how I should look at the situation. It is a challenge. It is a fight. It is a test. And the reward for passing the test, strong and authentic sexual discipline, is well worth the struggle. Let’s fight. 8 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:33pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
I have been keeping up with the challenge pretty well now. It has been at least 20 days since I masturbated or watched porn. I am happy about this. I feel like a recovering addict. I want to live a live fully free of porn and I am fighting for that. By the way, it does not even feel like a fight anymore. I just don’t watch porn. I just don’t masturbate. I fully acknowledge and accept my sexual urges, but I don’t canalize them toward porn or masturbation. Either I try to put them away because I want to think about other things or I start to fantasize about what I would do and how it would feel to have an available woman next to me. I am getting slightly hard writing this. I also notice that I am more in tune with my sexuality. I understand my body and my mind better. China White’s content certainly has a lot to do with this. Currently I feel much happier, fulfilled, and lively than in my porn addiction days. I don’t want to be a man guided by sex and lust like most men these days. I want to win this challenge. 345 more days to go! 4 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Nobody: 6:33pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
Lamentation of a frustrated redpiller. Redpillers truly do not have inner peace. 1 Like |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:34pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
I realized that as a man, I should not care about women in this life. I should take women out of my focus. I should not do things for women. And I should focus on myself, my ancestry, and nature. No, I have not been heartbroken. No, I have not been hurt by any woman. No woman has ever done me anything wrong, really. But I have eyes, and I can see. And what I see is that women are not reliable and a man is better off not trusting women. It was not easy for me to accept that. 5 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:34pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
I am on a 41-day streak out of porn and masturbation. This is great! I had never gone this far since I first ejaculated from watching porn. This is a huge victory. I intend on completing 365 continuous days on semen retention. 324 more steps ahead. 5 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:37pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
53 days completed. There are only two types of people: people who succumb and those who resist. I choose to be in the second group. I will endure during these 312 days left. I was so pumped up when I wrote: "there are only two types of people: people who succumb and those who resist." That motivated me so hard to keep up retaining and abstaining from sex/pòrn/mastürbation. When I wanted to stroke myself, I thought: "Are you among the ones who succumb? No! Stay in the battlefield!" 3 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:39pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
Crossing the two-months bar was not easy. These last two days, I felt strong sexual urges. I truly want to fück…. Even though I do not want a woman. Let me explain. Right now, I am not particularly interested in any woman. There is no woman who I like. There is not woman who I would like to have deep serious conversations with. There is no woman I would like to lead. There is no woman who I would like to have kids with. There is no woman who I would to take care of in the long term. There is no woman I would like to be in a meaningful relationship with. Why do I think about women every day then? It is just because I am hôrny. My body wants to ejaculate. Pòrn and mastürbation are out of the way, for reasons I mentioned before. The only outlet left to quench my thirst is the woman. So, I start to think about the woman. This is all. Women do not have any power over me. I think that women in general do not have any power over men. It is lust that has power over men. That lusts directs them to women, and women exploit it in their advantage. Remove lust from men and watch how powerless women become. A thought crossed my mind as I was resisting sexual urges. What if I could feel this same vibrant lust for something meaningful? What if I had a strong lust for learning languages? What if I had a strong lust for improving my expression (writing, speaking, drawing, graphic design)? What if I had a strong lust for polishing my mathematical abilities? What if I had a strong lust for sculpting my body? What if I had a strong lust for contributing to a better society? What if I had a strong lust for taking my whole family out of poverty? What if I had a strong lust for becoming an expert in many domains? What if I had a strong lust for understanding myself, my past, and my future? What if I had this same strong lust to have a meaningful existence? It is high time I rethought my desires. Three hundred and three more days. I keep going. 11 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:41pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
It is easy to be weak. Right now, nothing prevents me from closing the door and the curtails, getting under my couch, and viölating myself while watching questionable strangers having acted intercourse in another country. I can do it. I can 100% do it. My flesh wants me to do it. But my mind doesn’t. I can’t let my flesh rãpe my mind. My will has to be harder than my pénis. It is exceedingly tough. But we resist. If it was easy, it would not be very valuable. Only the strongest survive. I am the strongest. Sixty-three days completed, 302 days left. I simply can’t fail now. I have already endured for so long. I have to keep up. Ten months ahead. Ten months to endure. 4 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:41pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
I am happy right now. My life is not perfect but I feel like a wholesome human being. Being able to live out of perversion is a blissful experience. I do not even dream about fücking that much. Many of my thoughts are now about my future, my life, and philosophy. Life just feels overall better. I appreciate the trees, the waters, the soils. I appreciate people, I greet them with a smile and wish them well. I am thankful to all the material and immaterial entities that encouraged/facilitated this semen retention journey. Thank you so much. (365 - 81) days left. 5 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:43pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
Ninety-three days completed. The fight is still hard. I can say ‘fuçk it’ and open a pòrn website. But no! I can’t succumb. I don’t want to succumb. I have higher objectives in life. I have a family to get back to. I have an Africa to build. I have a semester to pass. I have skills to acquire. I have plans to establish. I have a world to explore. I can’t be drowning in lust when I have all these things. I should focus on my work. It is hard, and that is why only strong men can make it. I have three quarters left in this journey. 4 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:44pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
We are the 22th of May. I just marked the 105th day completed. Yes, I passed the 100 days checkpoint. This is major. I have never done this in my entire life. Nonetheless, I want to mention that I happened to watch about six or seven risqué and semi-nude pictures while browsing online for less than a second each. It was accidental and not on a pörn site. It has been 105 days since I have been in any pörn site, or watched a pörn video, or read a pörn comic/manga. I have 260 more days to go! It is exceedingly hard, but we fight. 5 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:45pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
May 29, 2023. 112 straight days without pörn/sex/mastürbation. But today, I browsed some NSFW subreddits and saw some sexual gifs and images. Most were just risqué and suggestive without nudity (at least not nudity around breasts, vaginas, and butts), while a minority contained naked breasts, asses, and sometimes vaginas. This minority did not include any form of sexual intercourse or masturbation, just women twerking or posing, and it was no near as sexually charged as porn found on porn sites. Plus, I have seen each of them for less than 5 seconds. But I cannot ignore the fact that it was not unintentional. The subreddits did not just pop off. And after watching one of these sexually explicit images, I still continued to browse. For this reason, I consider my continuous day streak without porn to end here, and I am starting a new one tomorrow. Since I did not masturbate, the no masturbation/sex streak continues. After completing 365 days without masturbation/sex, I will continue an additional 112 days so as to complete 365 days without porn too. I refuse to accept weakness. I sometimes fantasize about having a feminine and loyal housewife who just wants to take care of her home, her kids, her husband, herself. But how can I have that if I’m weak? How can a woman be fully feminine around a weak man? 5 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:50pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
After that last entry, I stayed 58 more days in the fight before relapsing on the 171st day. I failed to reach the 365. I did not even make it half way. This was the hardest battle I ever engaged in in my entire life. But it was extremely rewarding. I came out a stronger man with a more mature outlook on self, sex, lust, and life. This doesn't mean that I am satisfied with my performance. I need to go at least 365 days straight. I will be soon back on the front-lines because I choose strength over pleasure. 4 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 6:55pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
I lost the battle, but not the war. Lust will not win. Degeneracy will not win. Evil will not win. I am back on the front-lines! 5 Likes
|
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 7:22pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
I would like to express my greatest gratitude to the man who inspired me to take this joirney and whose message was a primary factor that kept me going: Mr. Keep It Simple https://youtube.com/@travelingonabudget7309 One the realest and most impactful content creators on youtube. 1 Like |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Snowx: 7:41pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
Interesting..I read to the end 2 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 7:48pm On Aug 03, 2023 |
Snowx: Thanks. I hope you got a thing or two from it. If you have any question, please let me know |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 1:10pm On Aug 04, 2023 |
I am getting back on the fight today! Mark August 4, 2024 on your calendar! I will go a full year without porn, sex, and masturbation. Not even risqué images are allowed. Not even sexual texts are allowed. No girlfriend. No relationship. I need to take women and sex out of my focus. I already lost this battle many times but I am not afraid of taking the challenge again. I want to become a strong man, a grand warrior. May the ancestors watch over me on this journey. Let's go! 4 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Alearna: 1:21pm On Aug 04, 2023 |
Kipaji:I'm with you brother on this journey. Let's get it done. Would you very much obliged to be my accountability partner? |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 1:32pm On Aug 04, 2023 |
Alearna: What does it mean? How does it work? Are you doing the challenge yourself? |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by TERMlNATOR(m): 1:41pm On Aug 04, 2023 |
. |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 1:49pm On Aug 04, 2023 |
I feel like a sayian in the hyperbolic time chamber.
|
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Alearna: 3:46pm On Aug 04, 2023 |
Kipaji:Yes, I've been on the journey and failed countless times. So I might as well join you on the journey today and occasionally relay my progress to you. I so much align with you on this for many reasons. We share similar sentiments. We both understand how difficult monk mode can be, having someone to be accountable too should help. Is this okay by you? |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Kipaji: 7:32pm On Aug 04, 2023 |
Yes. Let's go to the front lines, comrade! |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by BOSSkesh(m): 9:22pm On Aug 04, 2023 |
I’m in with this journey with you guys may the ancestors give strength You will conquer this evil You’re stronger You’re better 3 Likes |
| Re: The Journey Of A Monk by Alearna: 10:30pm On Aug 04, 2023 |
Kipaji:Okay, thank you. I will like to do weekly report.(Every Saturday maybe?) How do I report to you? I might as well stop frequenting nairaland. Should I drop my email address? 1 Like |
Bride Or Groom: Who Is Happier During The Wedding? / ..what Every Guy Really Wants To Know? / How True Is This? (pix)
(Go Up)
| Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 84 |