Dear single ladies, I want to give you some brutal advice.


Please my advice is mostly for the single unmarried ladies who really desire to get married to deserving men, so if you are one of those single ladies who don't see getting married as a desire or priority in life, please kindly ignore my counsel. That said, let's move on.

First, let me make it clear to all single ladies that the world has changed, I mean things have changed and still changing so fast with the advent of social media and internet technology revolution. What do I mean? Don't expect men or guys to act the same way men acted or treated women some 10 20 years ago. Social media is revolutionizing everything and changing the way we live our daily lives when compared to some years back.


Gone are the days men played absolute fools for love or to make ladies love them, yes there are still naive guys ready to simp around for ladies, but the number of such men is fast reducing as days passes.

Social media have made things that used to be secret to become open. Different love stories have been shared and guys have learned from other people's past mistakes. So don't expect any sound reasonable guy today to be your fantasy Prince Charming you once read in the romance novel or watched in the movie.


Another thing that has complicated issues for love, romance, relationship and marriage today is global economy struggles that have pushed so many able men to the edge, making them become more emotionless due to daily life struggles to meet up with their financial responsibilities.


Because of this global financial hardship that has made life more difficult for men, especially the graduates, men are now more conscious of the background and financial prospect of their future spouse unlike before when most men didn't bother much about whether their future spouse was jobless or not.


The big question is:

How does this affect you as a single unmarried lady desiring to settle down and build a healthy marriage/family?

It means that unlike before, to stand a good chance of getting a well to do husband, you as a single unmarried lady must:


Have a means of livelihood; be it a paid job/career, stable business, trade or craft. So prepare yourself to add some financial value to your future husband. Gone are the days men expect nothing from ladies they wish to marry, the game is fast changing, and to fit in, you must adjust your mindset going forward.



So you must prepare to add extra value to your future husband, if not, it may not be easy finding a deserving husband now as a single lady.


Beyond financial euipment and preparation, you as a single unmarried lady must equip yourself with some good home keeping skills. Learn to prepare simple meals.


Prepare to japa; don't sit back waiting to japa through your future husband, you too can japa on your own to increase your chances of securing a husband in the current scarce husband market, how? Explore study routes via scholarship grants. Google about Erasmus Mundus scholarship and research about it, and some other female gender based scholarships, I know a lot of ladies that migrated out of Nigeria via these fully funded scholarship opportunities and they moved with their husbands and family members.


Before you japa, secure a good man for yourself because there is no husband abroad. Reason being that most Nigerian guys abroad don't like marrying Nigerian ladies that just arrived abroad, and its more of a cultural thing, nothing else. So before you japa as a single unmarried lady, don't think husbands full abroad, I know a lot of beautiful single unmarried Nigerian ladies abroad still praying to God for a spouse because they abandoned their good Nigerian relationships thinking they would find better men when they get to their abroad destination but on arriving there, they got the cultural shock and are stuck with randy men abroad only interested in quenching their sexual thirst for the moment without intention of committing to any lady.



So before you japa from Nigeria, humble yourself and get hooked with a good guy in Naija, and if possible hurry and get a court wedding with him before you board that flight to obodo oyimbo.


If you make the mistake of boarding that flight to abroad without any solid relationship with a good guy in Nigeria, Nne, Omoge, I am telling you the truth that you may end up single forever. Yes you will have financial freedom oh, but nothing beats being a happily married lady with financial freedom. If you can achieve both feat, why leave one for the other?

Don't listen to any lady or woman telling you that marriage does not worth it oh. It is over worth it, especially for women if you marry the right man.


Make my wife hear una say marriage does not worth it hehe, na she go carry that person go court all by herself


My sister, marriage is over worth it for women that married the right man. And how do you marry the right man?


Be realistic.

Don't expect too much from men.

Don't look too up, and don't look too down, just be realistic and humble.

Wear respect, humility and friendliness like a clothe if you want to marry a good husband in Nigeria.


Please drop that feminist nonsense they practice in Nigeria which is synonymous with men-hating and even abroad. Be an original African woman with some modern touch and you will be a hot cake in the spinster market.


Stop moving around in a group with your so called girlfriends

Learn to be independent, learn to keep only healthy female friends, and limit the number to like 2 or 3 great minds who are focused on same goals of achieving career, businese and marital success.


Leave that your squad or friends that say "men are scum". Men are not scum oh, make my wife or some of my close friends' wives hear una say that kind thing hehe, na only Vladmir Putin go separate una fight.



Do you know that potential good husbands in Nigeria don't like those long eyelashes, heavy makeup and tall nails?


Hehe, I forgot to tell you that potential good husbands in Nigeria hate visible tattoos, nose rings and all those unnecessary piercings.

Do you know why? Potential good husbands in Nigeria respect their parents a lot, any guy that doesn't respect his father and mother is a potential bad husband.

Any guy that respects his father and mother and elderly family members will never marry a lady with some weird and waywardly looking appearance, remember we are religious hypocrites in Nigeria, but leave us like that oh you hear, it is helping to curtail our Nigerian badness. If not for religion eh, Nigeria for bad pass the middle of hell fire hehe, so leave us with our religious hypocrisy because it is helping to reduce our badness

My dear beautiful sisters, I love you Nigerian ladies so so much, una too fine, sometimes una beauty the make me want to marry all of una to myself alone kai lol, that is why I am giving you gorgeous ladies some of this secret advice, abeg learn some things from my mumu advice.


Stop talking about your ex, how he spends on you, how wonderful he was, haba na, if he was that wonderful, why is he not your wonderful husby abi na horseband according to my beautiful sis Poco hahahaha


Abeg leave that failed project and focus on your current porfolio. Let bygones be bygones. He belongs to history, and such history can only be told to nobody because nobody cares about such irrelevant history.


Bestie. Me too, with the permission of my gorgeous wifey, I am looking for a female bestie. Please if you are interested, apply with your credentials via PMs, remember you must be beautiful as in flat tummy is a must, average standing boobs is good, we don't like it big or flat, just average is okay for our ministry, giggling buttocks is a must oh, we no even mind about facial beauty. If you have jingling voice that's awesome for our gossip time as besties, height is not a barrier but you should be at least 5ft5 and above. Your skin color abi complexion no matter at all. Please you must be below 30yrs cos any lady that really wants to find a good hushand must not have a bestie lol.



If you are single lady in Nigeria and you want to find a good husband, this is one of the bitter truths I must tell you, as a single unmarried lady in Nigeria, please avoid living alone.

Yes you are working in the city and your parents may be living in the village or in another state or city, sister, find a relative, like your siblings or something to live with.

We Nigerian men abi boys are not well you know, we mostly de on colos and e de affect our reasoning most times, abeg avoid living with your fellow girlfriends oh, that kind thing de make guys cancel you as a potential spouse.



Another wahala na car. It is time to tell you the brutal truths, yes no lies here. Most potential good husbands in Nigeria have some atom of insecurity in them, yes na me talk am lol.


We derive ecstasy in giving beautiful ladies car lift on Sundays after Church service or even other days. How do you want us to feel happy and fulfilled when we wash our car finish to come impress you and spoil you, from nowhere you come jump enter your own car in this Nigeria? For what? Who gave you such audacity to buy a car when we never marry you? Lolz


How do you intend to meet a potential hubby when you drive around in your own luxury car as a single lady and its not as if you came from a rich family and surrounded by rich childhood friends and schoolmates that don't see owing a car as a single lady in Nigeria as a big achievement? By the way, who is bought the car for you? How is you to be humbling inside big car? How is we boys going to impress you self?


Church will not even close you don reach house. Or Church will close you remain for inside Church without coming outside so boys can toast you once and for all, haba na.


A guy says hello to you, you begin to rate his atire, haba haba, don't you know big boys hardly dress to kill? Nne calm down oh, good products don't always come in shiny packages oh, I am warning you now oh.


But I cannot marry from another Church? Na your Papa get the Church? As a lady, you have no permanent Church, your husband's Church is your Church, unless its all those garment Churches, I may agree with you sha cos their own Church na another level lol.


I can understand you not wanting to marry from another tribe, but you see not wanting to marry from another state inside the same tribe, na special deliverance you need oh lol.



Above all, pray pray pray. Don't let anybody tell you that there is no God, there is God oh and He answers honest prayers that aligns with His will for you. God's will for you is to see you live a fulfilling life filled with joy and happiness. Pray seriously before you accept any man as husband, this should never be compromised.



You can pray in combination with fleece or other ways that God speak to you. Even if you are not a born again, that doesn't mean you shouldn't seek God's face when selecting a life partner.

No husband no hushand no mean say you go accept a man without vision as your husband, God forbid. A visionless man is like an accident-bound car, it must crash, so avoid them. How do you know a man without vision?


He is stuck with I am a graduate.
He doesn't know how to improvise when things aren't working as planned.
He hardly take steps towards his goals. He procastinates.
He takes too long to take a decision on critical things.
He doesn't take calculated risk.
He likes comfort so much.
He doesn't like dirtying his hands to make money.
His only life ambition is to get a good job, no plans ever to start his own business or plan B in case good job doesn't come.


He loves spending a woman's money.
He loves borrowing.
He asks you for money always.
He is shameless.
He talks anyhow, no decorum even in public.
He likes food more than anything.
His hobbies are drinking, partying, watching movies and sleeping.
His siblings doesn't respect him.
His friends have no regard for him.
He spends most of his time in Church or Mosque hoping for a miracle with no or less work.
He believes so much in connection, miracle and luck.


Once you notice these things in a man, please run oh and never look back.



Let me go back to the oza room to finish my assignment, I will be back

Y

franchasofficia

This is super insightful...
Please keep em coming...

Fahvvy:
franchasofficia

This is super insightful...
Please keep em coming...

Glad you enjoyed it

Persephone1:
I don't know how a grown up will wake up early in the morning and would pick advising single women as a quest of all problems of the world and Nigeria specifically. Small-mindedness or boredom?

Hehe, time difference plus I love Nigerian ladies to pieces, including you hun

Good points

You are the one suffering from boredom... Why una hate truth like this...

Persephone1:
I don't know how a grown up will wake up early in the morning and would pick advising single women as a quest of all problems of the world and Nigeria specifically. Small-mindedness or boredom?

Thank you for the advice..
I don't even know why I was smiling while reading, make sense

*Abeg leave that failed project and focus on your current portfolio *
This one hit me hard o

As for living alone, don't you think it's better for sanity after a certain age, even though unmarried?

.

Unmarried elderly woman and an impotent man who are more bitter

An unmarried woman in early thirty is already bitter and violent... From experience...

Rucheen:
Unmarried elderly woman and an impotent man who is more bitter

All your point are top notch but the part you said single girls should not be driving their own car around, well I can argue that point with you, Me personally I don't see anything bad in a woman driving her own car beyond attracting good man, what about stress of taking public transport, what about security reasons and so many other reasons among others. A guy who sees a girl in her own car and likes her should go for her if he is bold and courageous enough

Vijuchoco:
Thank you for the advice..
I don't even know why I was smiling while reading, make sense

*Abeg leave that failed project and focus on your current portfolio *
This one hit me hard o

As for living alone, don't you think it's better for sanity after a certain age, even though unmarried?

lolz


As for living alone as an unmarried lady in Nigeria, that thing has cost many good ladies their potential husbands even without their knowledge.


Its more of a cultural thing in Nigeria which we haven't learned to embrace completely; only few Nigerians have embraced some of things which civilization has brought to us, sadly

Crucialgem:
All your point are top notch but the part you said single girls should not be driving their own car around, well I can argue that point with you, Me personally I don't see anything bad in a woman driving her own car beyond attracting good man, what about stress of taking public transport, what about security reasons and so many other reasons among others. A guy who sees a girl in her own car and likes her should go for her if he is bold and courageous enough

You know its good and in fact awesome when viewed from the civilized mindset, but based on Nigeria's cultural and traditional mindset, majority of Nigerian men won't find it so easy to look beyond such, its sad I know but like I said, its a very bitter truth single ladies must learn and find way to make it not stand as a disadvantage to their dating, relationship and courtship. It requires a lot of wisdom from the lady

Persephone1:
I don't love you.
Why not leave Nigerian ladies alone and focus on women within your time zone if lecturing women on Marriage is your life goal. I mean we've read threads like this over and over again, don't you guys ever get tired?

Even the ones overseas don't seem to get motivated to do other things than discuss women and marriage. Phew!

I have listen to that song that said you must marry me?



You must love me back hehe



Aside dishing out advice, I also use Nairaland as a jotter to jot down things that comes into my mind; from politics, leadership, relationship, romance, marriage, business, etc as the spirit leads.


Nigeria must work by fire by force

Allow each person learn..before you turn motivational speaker for their eyes.

Nice writeup'' when a teacher is teaching in a class, is not compulsory everybody will learn but atleast some will learn from your writeup..
Others will learn the d hard way.....
When regret take ur peace of mind you will understand better....

Persephone1:
I look forward to reading your knowledgeable epistles on other matters aside an overflogged topic on Nl.

Thank you in advance.

Click my profile and read my topics on politics

talented321:
Nice writeup'' when a teacher is teaching in a class, is not compulsory everybody will learn but atleast some will learn ur from writeup..
Others will learn the d hard way.....
When regret take ur peace of mind....

Na so

You're married, bro. And with a kid, if I recall.


Why don't you leave single ladies alone already?

Persephone1:
I don't know how a grown up will wake up early in the morning and would pick advising single women as a quest of all problems of the world and Nigeria specifically. Small-mindedness or boredom?

Na ignorance dey do u so

.

Persephone1:
Abi... Lessons is supposed to save for his wife and daughters. Imagine what a grown man is writing epistles on.

And you, welcome back. Try not to go back

Likeee.


Thank youuuu 💕💕. Though, I'm not really back like that. But I may consider staying a little bit longer now that you asked 😊.

NL just doesn't seem as engaging as it was to me. How have you been? And the restless stalkers/trolls?