Nl folks, pls your opinions are needed.
I'm currently 31, earning reasonably well and with greater prospects for the future.

The pressure to settle down is getting stronger by the day. However, I don't consider myself psychically fit for marriage in the midst of the deterioration that the marriage Institution is experiencing.

Judging by my current perspective and disposition on the subject of marriage, I don't see myself setting down even in the next 5years. I try to carefully look at the pros and cons of contracting a marriage in today's world and I always come to the conclusion that there are more cons than pros.

I'm also not a very family oriented person in the sense of creating familial bonds and deeply cherishing them hence I derive my fulfillment and pleasure in doing the things I love to do, acquiring wealth and giving help wherever I deem necessary.

The thought of opting for an adoption is beginning to occupy the greater part of my consciousness and the reasons are few and in my opinion very valid.

1. Progeny is very important in social arrangements especially in the Igbo society. I'll definitely be needing someone to carry on the family's name and legacy when I'm no more.

2. If my perspective on marriage changes for any reason and I decide to take the step towards contracting one, I may have become a little too old then to handle the perculiates of marriage and family life( parenting, school runs issues etc). But with a child already in picture and almost a teenager by then, that part of the problem would have been kicked out..

Nb:As for raising the adopted child, myself, parents, siblings and a helper will be involved while financial responsibility will be exclusively mine.

Kindly help me with insightful and mature advice that is based on direct or third party experience.

Hmmmmmm,
Why not simply get yourself a babymama?

tasalanoni:
Nl folks, pls your opinions are needed.
I'm currently 31, earning reasonably well and with greater prospects for the future.

The pressure to settle down is getting stronger by the day. However, I don't consider myself psychically fit for marriage in the midst of the deterioration that the marriage Institution is experiencing.

Judging by my current perspective and disposition on the subject of marriage, I don't see myself setting down even in the next 5years. I try to carefully look at the pros and cons of contracting a marriage in today's world and I always come to the conclusion that there are more cons than pros.

I'm also not a very family oriented person in the sense of creating familial bonds and deeply cherishing them hence I derive my fulfillment and pleasure in doing the things I love to do, acquiring wealth and giving help wherever I deem necessary.

The thought of opting for an adoption is beginning to occupy the greater part of my consciousness and the reasons are few and in my opinion very valid.

1. Progeny is very important in social arrangements especially in the Igbo society. I'll definitely be needing someone to carry on the family's name and legacy when I'm no more.

2. If my perspective on marriage changes for any reason and I decide to take the step towards contracting one, I may have become a little too old then to handle the perculiates of marriage and family life( parenting, school runs issues etc). But with a child already in picture and almost a teenager by then, that part of the problem would have been kicked out..

Nb:As for raising the adopted child, myself, parents, siblings and a helper will be involved while financial responsibility will be exclusively mine.

Kindly help me with insightful and mature advice that is based on direct or third party experience.

It is a good idea provided you will not discriminate against the child in the future when you change your mind on having your own biological kids.

What you are looking for is companionship not a progeny(you just don't know what it is yet) Yes you are aware of a gap but you are mistaking it for something else.

If you dig deeper, you will see a crave for a female partner. And when you dig even further down the root, you will see something unclear, undefined, impossible to grasp by you but if light should prick your heart, you will see your creator's arms wide opened.

phorget:
Hmmmmmm,
Why not simply get yourself a babymama?

Rephrase your delusional statement.
You should say " get a surrogate mother"
Baby mamas are ladies who dated a man and had kids for them,but they broke up due to one reason or another.

Onyiiobi7735:

Rephrase your delusional statement.
You should say " get a surrogate mother"
Baby mamas are ladies who dated a man and had kids for them,but they broke up due to one reason or another.

You are busy blowing grammar but I'm sure you know exactly what I'm talking about.

dawnomike:
It is a good idea provided you will not discriminate against the child in the future when you change your mind on having your own biological kids.

That's completely out of the picture.

phorget:
Hmmmmmm,
Why not simply get yourself a babymama?

The idea of a babymama sounds somewhat immoral, deceitful and wicked to me. I believe that if a lady is good enough to produce a child for you, she should also be good enough to be brought close as a wife rather than a mere baby making machine

tasalanoni:

The idea of a babymama sounds somewhat immoral, deceitful and wicked to me. I believe that if a lady is good enough to produce a child for you, she should also be good enough to be brought close as a wife rather than a mere baby making machine

Some ladies cant subject themselves to live under any man but they'll appreciate having a child and cater for the child even without the mans support.

Make sure you think it thru proper.
among the existence God love the most are orphans.
Make sure you av all in place to make the child's comfortable. Also make a vow to ur self upon having ur own family, there won't b discrimination.


Good luck

phorget:




You are busy blowing grammar but I'm sure you know exactly what I'm talking about.

Of course I know what you are saying.

"I'm also not a very family oriented person in the sense of creating familial bonds and deeply cherishing them".....You are not family oriented and you still want to raise a child not biologically yours?

In a system where social service truly works and scrutiny is properly done......you will not qualify to adopt a child because you don't have the capacity to, outside money.

tasalanoni:
■ I'm also not a very family oriented person in the sense of creating familial bonds and deeply cherishing them hence I derive my fulfillment and pleasure in doing the things I love to do, acquiring wealth and giving help wherever I deem necessary.
The thought of opting for an adoption is beginning to occupy the greater part of my consciousness and the reasons are few and in my opinion very valid.
1. Progeny is very important in social arrangements especially in the Igbo society. I'll definitely be needing someone to carry on the family's name and legacy when I'm no more.
2. If my perspective on marriage changes for any reason and I decide to take the step towards contracting one, I may have become a little too old then to handle the perculiates of marriage and family life( parenting, school runs issues etc). But with a child already in picture and almost a teenager by then, that part of the problem would have been kicked out..
Nb: As for raising the adopted child, myself, parents, siblings and a helper will be involved while financial responsibility will be exclusively mine. Kindly help me with insightful and mature advice that is based on direct or third party experience.

I would not recommend you adopt any child into your situation.

phorget:
Hmmmmmm,
Why not simply get yourself a babymama?

.
did he tell you he was looking for a babymama?

Uyi168:
.
did he tell you he was looking for a babymama?

He should have simply gone for adoption rather than seeking our validation.

Go for anything u want pls...but don't come back to regret it pls.

Mindlog:
"I'm also not a very family oriented person in the sense of creating familial bonds and deeply cherishing them".....You are not family oriented and you still want to raise a child not biologically yours?

In a system where social service truly works and scrutiny is properly done......you will not qualify to adopt a child because you don't have the capacity to, outside money.

He is just confused and don't know d next step to take

phorget:



He should have simply gone for adoption rather than seeking our validation.

If proper scrutiny is done, he would not qualify for adoption.

One lady broke his heart.
Kpele.
Give it time, you will heal and try again.

I'll definitely be needing someone to carry on the family's name and legacy when I'm no more.

When you are no more, you cease to exist & you lose all feelings & consciousness. So why would you be bothered about when you are no more?

Do whatever makes you happy while alive, & leave a legacy that will positively impact humanity.

&for a Christian, aim to make heaven.

Nice one, the best is to get a girl pregnant. If in future you change your mind you can still marry her.

Many people I know that got married they either got a girl pregnant or they got married for materials gains.

Many didn't wake up one morning And think about marring or to settle down.

Something happened that warrant it.

Damnnn niggar

That thing called marriage is not for me

Ok

Once gave this some thoughts.......

nice idea

Nice one boss.. God bless you... Adopt a kid and take good care of d kid... Adoption is something people shy away from most of the time especially in Nigeria... I wonder why

Why not impregnate a woman and then pay her off after childbirth

Ain't no fan of marriage

Wise man
For men, marriage na setup (in my own opinion)