Hi lovely nairalanders...
Pls I need your advice on someone's behalf.
There's this couple about to get married, I've been councelling them for a while...
The bride to be said while she was living with her elder sister at the age of 12, her brother in-law made advances on her...
Years after she had left them, shortly before she met her now fiance, her sister gave birth(5years ago), and she went there to help, the sister remained in the hospital, while she had to go home to sleep, the brother in-law came home and raped her again(now has a grown lady).
She didn't tell the sister because she was scared of how it will affect the sisters health, the family etc.....
She is still scared to speak out, but her fiance wants her to.
Note... Her sister has 2 daughters, and while she was there, she had the feeling her brother in-law was touching his daughters, although she never caught him red handed, she said she sometimes noticed blood in the girls private part when bathing them...(just suspecting).

She says it will scatter her sister's marriage and the family....
Pls advice.... Thank you.

And you say, you are a counsellor.

If she has evidence to prove her point, she should by all means do tell.

Omo. Orishirishi

Since the Fiance is already aware & is urging her, she has no option but to tell the tale.

Else she could have kept the whole secret to herself & lived happily ever after, unless of course her conscience was unbearably bothering her.

Mysteriousworld:
Hi lovely nairalanders...
Pls I need your advice on someone's behalf.
There's this couple about to get married, I've been councelling them for a while...
The bride to be said while she was living with her elder sister at the age of 12, her brother in-law made advances on her...
Years after she had left them, shortly before she met her now fiance, her sister gave birth(5years ago), and she went there to help, the sister remained in the hospital, while she had to go home to sleep, the brother in-law came home and raped her again(now has a grown lady).
She didn't tell the sister because she was scared of how it will affect the sisters health, the family etc.....
She is still scared to speak out, but her fiance wants her to.
Note... Her sister has 2 daughters, and while she was there, she had the feeling her brother in-law was touching his daughters, although she never caught him red handed, she said she sometimes noticed blood in the girls private part when bathing them...(just suspecting).

She says it will scatter her sister's marriage and the family....
Pls advice.... Thank you.

She should speak out to her sister with sense.

She was raped as an adult and no visible bruises/injuries on her and the assumed culprit?

Let there be justice if you have senze.

the choice is hers:
A) tell the truth and shame the devil
B) stay quiet and suffer in silence

IMHO next time she is in the presence of the rapist (and while recording him), she should tell him that what he did back in the days was not right and that she wants to confess to her sister etc....record his answer and present it to the world as you expose him.

Aren't you the counsellor?

Foodqueen:
And you say, you are a counsellor.

I'm not a councellor ....
Besides, what's bad with this, if you have nothing to say keep silent.

1Sharon:
Aren't you the counsellor?

I'm not a counselor, I said Im counselling them... Besides, a good counselor wouldn't shy away from this kinda platform, there are people with experiences here.

Get evidence before coming out to say anything. Most people shouting talk talk talk are just being sentimental. Use sense in things like these. Get him to talk or chat about it. Get voice recordings or something. Anything he can’t deny. That’s when you can now come out.

BrighterSyde:
Get evidence before coming out to say anything. Most people shouting talk talk talk are just being sentimental. Use sense in things like these. Get him to talk or chat about it. Get voice recordings or something. Anything he can’t deny. That’s when you can now come out.

What's the next step after that?

Mysteriousworld:


What's the next step after that?

Contact any human rights organization platform or go to any police station and report the case. If they can also get the young girls and ask questions to be sure while recording the discussion that will help in proving if they have been molested.

Silence is golden sha.

I don't pray for any woman to be a victim of rape but what about shouting and let the whole neighbor come to your rescue, I really don't know how rape works but it's very hard to even penetrate a well consensual sex not to talk of rape ... I can never understand women.

Somebody rape you when you were 12, and you still went there to sleep now that you are an adult. What happened to sleeping in an hotel, what happened to going back the same day.

Mysteriousworld

Justice is good, but there are implications -

1. Your sister's marriage will end and her children's destinies will be altered one way or the order.
2. Your relationship with your sister will also be affected as you will be questioned why you kept it unknown for so long and what your motives are at this time.
3. You will feel better initially, but your relationship with your fiancée will be affected in future. In the event that you face your own relationship crisis, you will be reminded of your capacity to keep information compartmentalized.


Decision is yours.

everythingtall3:
I don't pray for any woman to be a victim of rape but what about shouting and let the whole neighbor come to your rescue, I really don't know how rape works but it's very hard to even penetrate a well consensual sex not to talk of rape ... I can never understand women.

Somebody rape you when you were 12, and you still went there to sleep now that you are an adult. What happened to sleeping in an hotel, what happened to going back the same day.

lol