For married couples: I have observed that most couples start their relationships as friends, but after kids and other demands of family life kick in, it seems as if they start losing the emotional intimacy and friendship they once had - settling for a boring marriage where all they talk about is everything else but themselves. Why does it happen? Would you consider your spouse your best friend? Why?

No. not my best friend for all the reasons you stated and many more

hmm

I think your marriage is in trouble if your wife is not close to being your best friend. Why? Well, it is that friendship that will see you through the hard times when you have your serious disagreements which are almost inevitable. I think this is the reason why many marriages fail. Looks may fade-away, sex may become jaded, money may vanish but true friendship endures and should be the foundation of any marriage.

Very correct Mac.

At post, my husband is most definitely my best friend. We started as friends actually, and it was clear from the start that we both understood the importance of beings friends. Now many years after, with all the usual storms married people experience, we have managed to keep the flame burning. Not easy in the least bit. There was a time when we almost gave up, but I thank God that the hard times have merely helped to strengthen us. I'm most definitely enjoying my marriage now more than when we got married 13 years ago.

No, he is my very good friend, my spouse and my confidant but definately not my best pal. I like to shoe shop, he cant be with me in the store for more than 20 minutes, I like to gossip he doesnt, I like to talk about silly stuff, he calls it silly and says " how does this affect me" ,lol, my best friend on the other hand does all these things with me. However, My hubby and I hang out a lot but there is a place for hubby there is a place for bestie

debrief08:

No, he is my very good friend, my spouse and my confidant but definately not my best pal. I like to shoe shop, he cant be with me in the store for more than 20 minutes, I like to gossip he doesnt, I like to talk about silly stuff, he calls it silly and says " how does this affect me" ,lol, my best friend on the other hand does all these things with me. However, My hubby and I hang out a lot but there is a place for hubby there is a place for bestie

I could have written these words

Miss_Ife:

I could have written these words

heheheeeeeeeeeeeee, lol. We na d same sha. women and our guilt pleasures

I am not married but I think in most cases, if the marriage is predicated on good reasons, they become confidant and best friends over time because they are not ashamed of discussing anything.

maclatunji:

I think your marriage is in trouble if your wife is not close to being your best friend. Why? Well, it is that friendship that will see you through the hard times when you have your serious disagreements which are almost inevitable. I think this is the reason why many marriages fail. Looks may fade-away, sex may become jaded, money may vanish but true friendship endures and should be the foundation of any marriage.

I can only say you are a breath of fresh air!
Very well said.
Thanks

debrief08:

No, he is my very good friend, my spouse and my confidant but definately not my best pal. I like to shoe shop, he cant be with me in the store for more than 20 minutes, I like to gossip he doesnt, I like to talk about silly stuff, he calls it silly and says " how does this affect me" ,lol, my best friend on the other hand does all these things with me. However, My hubby and I hang out a lot but there is a place for hubby there is a place for bestie

Lucky you, my husband hates shopping, but he is everything a wife will wish for.

Shola (f):

Lucky you, my husband hates shopping, but he is everything a wife will wish for.

All men hate shopping. If your husband loves shopping then he's probably gay

My husband is my best best friend. I believe in quality not quantity of friends so I have few of them. When am with my friends we chat and discuss issues they re goin through and other gist immediately my husband gets back not that I want to tell him but there is this force that I just must tell him and vice versa. Things I sholdnt no he tells me and all. We are buddies. Not easy though we have our differences but compare to things that bind us together they are minute

Once you take those marriage vows,your spouse becomes your best friend.

Hmmm,this is a very big question. As a woman,when growing up we all prayed to have a happy home with the best hubby were are hubby is our best friend and confidant,cause they are our crown. Our spouse are supposed to be our best friends,but with a whole lot happening now,lots of women are regreting being married to their man and women too regreting having such husbands and wished they could turn the hands of tme. So many challenges comes with marrige,alot makes spouses turn to enemies while fews makes them sronger in love. It is only Gods grace thet makes spouses bestfriend forever.
As for me my hubby is my best friend and i pray by God grace he remains my best friend.
@agiboma,i have always admired your responce in all thread and i know woth you have been tru. I realy feel for you,but i assure you that God is in control and will surely make you the happiest at the end. God bless you and may your kids make you a proud mum.

No way which kind best friend be dat one nah,shopping he no dey do,partying he no like am,any way he his my husband not my best Friend.

My Husband is my best friend, he is my gossip buddy!!! he loves to gossip!!!   , we share virtually everything, he is not afraid to wear my shorts even if it rips while he is trying to squeeze into them.

@ chelsea4su
 
no every husband need to go alone with wife to make shopping and party. Some body like me i will not cos 80% of the women spent more time when bargaining, the scale of preference may change in any given time and a lots. Secondly, some women think their spouses are not trust to them a case of if their is remaining changes and so on.

I can't imagine anyone else being my best friend but my husband. What I can tell my closest girlfriend is not even up to 10% of what I can share comfortably with my hubby. We talk, laugh, joke about practically anything & everything. From intimate 'female' issues to who scored the last goal on his Inter milan, from gossiping about the lady that just walked by with huge chests (lol) to dissecting the plot of our favorite TV series, from gleefully informing me when he gets home about the long time he spent in the men's room/toilet that afternoon (eewww! lol) to 'honey, you put too much pepper in the stew again' lol. No topic is off-limit or taboo . . . infact self na that one we dey talk pass lol. My hubby is my best buddy and always will be!

 All in all, communication lines must be way way more open between spouses than between anyone else.

The earlier u start cin ur hubby ur best friend d beta 4 u

My wife is my best friend.

To have one's spouse as his/her best friend is ideal in every marriage and if there is anything short of this, one can never get the best out of marriage. However this intimacy is not automatic. It has to be built by concious effort. Some couples were 'lucky' to have married as best friends but if they dont deliberatly build thier marriages their intimacy will degenerate over time. When i married my wife i cant say we were that close friends. We had a number of differences that usually make us disagree. But over time our intimacy have grown and she is my best friend now. each day our marriage is becoming sweeter. We already have a child. Its all by God's mercies though. However I think this issue of "keeping communication lines always open and not having off-limit topic" is crucial in buildind intimacy in marriage. [b][/b]

I wish she is, but she is not
Fourteen years down,I wonder why i married her
I wish i could draw back the hands of time
Though I have not given up hope yet
I am still hoping, hoping for a change
Believing that with God, all things are possible (Luke 1:37)

My spouse is my best friend. She is the one I gossip stuffs with

@ayodele 123, sorry to hear I know we women can be a very hard bone to crack please try to mend the walls btw you two. Has you are hurting she is hurting even more. You can talk about it reminding each other how it use to be.God will help ur home

JeSoul:

I can't imagine anyone else being my best friend but my husband. What I can tell my closest girlfriend is not even up to 10% of what I can share comfortably with my hubby. We talk, laugh, joke about practically anything & everything. From intimate 'female' issues to who scored the last goal on his Inter milan, from gossiping about the lady that just walked by with huge chests (lol) to dissecting the plot of our favorite TV series, from gleefully informing me when he gets home about the long time he spent in the men's room/toilet that afternoon (eewww! lol) to 'honey, you put too much pepper in the stew again' lol. No topic is off-limit or taboo . . . infact self na that one we dey talk pass lol. My hubby is my best buddy and always will be!

 All in all, communication lines must be way way more open between spouses than between anyone else.

I think you have a great marriage. Keep it that way with God's Love, humility, Communication. Wish you the best.

pspeak:

[b], but after kids and other demands of family life kick in, it seems as if they start losing the emotional intimacy and friendship they once had

well, Marriage is sweet to those who are there cos they follow their heart desire(for both the man and the woman) though some marry gay and some marry lesbians, some also marry ladies with too many friends, those can nt work.
For any marriage to be enjoyed your spouse has to be your sister, brother, best friend, confidant, father, mother infact everything to you.

Ya!, why not?

She 's ma lover and ma BEST FRIEND!

chelsea4su:

No way which kind best friend be dat one nah,shopping he no dey do,partying he no like am,any way he his my husband not my best Friend.

lol my words exactly

my husband is 1st my best friend, then my husband and then my lover. Anything i cant tell him,i can tell no other and vice verse. Couples should be very open to each other cos its d only way to build trust which is one of d most important ingridents of marriage. Friendship,the most important ship in marriage.