**MATHEMATICAL LOVE LETTER**

My Dear Love, Yesterday, I was passing by your rectangular house in trigonometric lane. There I saw you with your cute circular face, conical nose and spherical eyes, standing in your triangular garden. Before seeing you, my heart was a null set, but when a vector of magnitude (likeness) from your eyes at a deviation of theta radians made a tangent to my heart, it differentiated.

My love for you is a quadratic equation with real roots, which only you can solve by making good binary relation with me. The cosine of my love for you by making good binary relation with me. The cosine of my love for you extends to infinity. I promise that I should not resolve you into partial functions but if I do so, you can integrate me by applying the limits from zero to infinity. You are as essential to me as an element to a set. The geometry of an element to a set.

The geometry of my life revolves around your acute personality. My love, if you do not meet me at parabola restaurant on date 10 at sunset, when the sun is making an angle of 160 degrees, my heart would be like a solved polynomial of degree 10. With love from your higher order derivatives of maxima and minima.

Yours lover

A man went to meet his fatherin law to be & was
chewing gum.The farmer in law shouted on him in a harsh
voice...
Father In Law :- Young man, U're coming to seek my
daughter's hand in marriage and u're chewing gum.
That's a sign of disrespect!
Man :- Sir, I only chew gum when i drink or smoke.
Father In Law :- U mean u drink & smoke and u're here to
seek my daughter's hand in marriage?
Man :- Sir I only drink & smoke when i go to the club.
Father In Law :- U club too?
Man :- I'm sorry sir, I startedclubbing when i came out of
prison.
Father In Law :- U've also been in prison before? Omg!
Man :- Sorry sir, I went to jailwhen i killed somebody.
Father In Law :- What!!! U're akiller
Man :- Sir, It happened out ofanger.It was certain man
that didn't allow me to marry his daughter so i killed him.
Father In Law :- U are highly welcome my son.U are on the
right track. U're absolutely the right man for my
daughter. Have ur seat pls n let me get u some kola nut.......lol.. ­...GUD AM

An old woman has a daughter who lives abroad but she cannot afford 3square meals a day.
One day, the landlord visited d woman and asked her: Madam why are u struggling to eat when u have a child abroad? The old woman
replies: Don't mind that girl, uponall the money we spent on her,she is only sending me photograph of an old white men,I wouldn't. Know if he wants to marry an old man. The land lord asked: Pls, can i see the photo?
woman brought it out and it wasbundles of 100 dollars Bill.
if You were the landlord, what will you do?

If you entered into
the church and sat
close to your EX and
the next thing you
hear is your pastor
sayin "Tell your
neighbour I LOVE
YOU,"
what will you
do?

Gr8

A man and a woman meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks.

"I'm going down to give blood."

"How much do you get paid for giving blood?"

"About $20."

"Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman angrily gets off the elevator.

The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again.

"Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?"

"Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.

Police: where do u live?
Akpos: with my parents
Police: where do ur parent live?
Akpos: with me
Police: where do u all live?
Akpos: togerther
Police: where is ur houz?
Akpos: next to my neighbor houz
Police: where is ur neighbor houz?
Akpos: if I tell u, u won't believe me
Police: tell me
Akpos: next to my houz

A farmer was in a bar drinking and looking all depressed.
His friend asked him why he was looking depressed and he replied, "Some things you just can't explain. This morning I was outside milking. As soon as the bucket was fill the cow kicked it down with his left foot so I tied up his left to a pole.
I began to fill up the bucket again and he kicked it down with his right foot, so I tied his right to a pole too.
As soon as I finished milkin'' him again he knocked down the bucket with his with his tail and I took off my belt and tied up his tail with my belt.
As I was tying up his tail, my pants dropped down, then my wife came out and well, trust me, some things you just can't explain!

Two Brothers nick-named
P-SQUARE sang a song called DO ME
and got IFUNAYA
pregnant. They ran to escape the TEMPTATION
but their BIZZY BODY couldn't allow them
stay, because,
E NO EASY.
While running, they ran into DANGER
till they began to ROLL IT
until the GAME IS OVER.
This twin brothers have now decided to trick BEAUTIFUL ONYINYE
by telling her 'you must CHOP MY MONEY'

I knw delta iz 5k

Girl : "Forgive me father for I have sinned."

Priest : "What have you done my child?"

Girl : "I called a man a son of a bitch."

Priest : "Why did you call him a son of a
bitch?"

Girl : "Because he touched my hand."

Priest : "Like this?" (as he touches her hand)

Girl : "Yes father."

Priest : "That's no reason to call a man a son of a bitch."

Girl : "Then he touched my breast."

Priest : "Like this?" (as he touched her breast)

Girl : "Yes father."

Priest : "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

Girl : "Then he took off my clothes, father."

Priest : "Like this?" (as he takes off her
clothes)

Girl : "Yes father."

Priest : "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

Girl : "Then he stuck his you know what into
my you know where."

Priest : "Like this?" (as he stuck his you know
what into her you know where)

Girl : "YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES
FATHER!!!"

(after a few minutes)

Priest : "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

Girl : "But father,he had AIDS!"

Priest : "THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!"

If allawi no dey mora dey if allawi dey mora dey hight

Das gr8 it is better for that

Wahala dey oo

In WAEC examination, Akpos was asked to complete the following:

1) He who fights n run away?
Akpos: e don surrender be dat na, na fear catch am.

2) A rolling stone?
Akpos: No fit just dey roll, na person push am.

3) He who lives in a glass house?
Akpos: Na rich politician e go be.

4) A stitch in time?
Akpos: dey prevent further tear tear.

5) Birds of d same feather?
Akpos: Na d same mama born them.

6) One good turn?
Akpos: Na correct power steering fit do am.

7) A bird in hand?
Akpos: Wetin e wan be again if nobe barbeque. Dem plenty for chicken republic.

Half bread is better than?
Akpos: Puff puff, buns or garri without sugar.

9) A journey of a thousand miles?
Akpos: Na d person wahala be dat na, Why e no enter car or aeroplane jeje?

10) He who laughs last?
Akpos: Get brain problem. Make dem examine am becos na begining of madness be dat.

11) A patient dog?
Akpos: Na hunger go kill am.

12) All work and no play?
Akpos: Na bank job be dat bros.

13) Once beaten?
Akpos: Naa revenge go follow b dat.

14) A fool at forty?
Akpos: U never see Naija own, our own start at 50.

15) A friend in need?
Akpos: Na parasite b dat.
(16) Slow and steady... Akpos: walahi na last u go carry. Mownin