When all roads seems heading to a stumbling block n d only way out is calling it quit. Though I know there is no right time/special moment of breaking someone's heart; especially if the person is truly in love with you. My curiousity grows when my friend(girl) told me she just ended her relationship of 5yrs with a phone text message (funny isn't it). Maybe that is the reason I ended up with so many GFs! Just want to know how u pop d pop question. Or how u got d message (bang). D method being used, without much hard feelings.

there is no HOW without hurting the other person's feelings!
Just say it and get it over with already!

Slimyem its OVER!
simple. If she wanna go hang herself on a tree, who cares?
Mchewwww

phemi3: When all roads seems heading to a stumbling block n d only way out is calling it quit. Though I know there is no right time/special moment of breaking someone's heart; especially if the person is truly in love with you. My curiousity grows when my friend(girl) told me she just ended her relationship of 5yrs with a phone text message (funny isn't it). Maybe that is the reason I ended up with so many GFs! Just want to know how u pop d pop question. Or how u got d message (bang). D method being used, without much hard feelings.

Have balls
There is no nice way out

Chimezie198: Slimyem its OVER!
simple. If she wanna go hang herself on a tree, who cares?
Mchewwww

Anuofia!

THERE IS NO EASY WAY OUT ON THIS Op, no matter ow u serve it, it wil def hurt.

The Cowardly, immature way:
1. Disappearing, no calls, no texts. The person will get the message.
2. Breaking up harshly, blame the other party completely. You did nothing wrong and you just want that person gone fast.
3. Insensitive, sending a text. When you started the rel, you did it in person. Now you avoid the messiness.

The following 3 guarantees you'll end up regretting your decision or begging whilst that person moves on and laughs. Trust me. I've done all 3, you will regret that decision. Reason being, is that how you break up reflects how you were in the relationship (Shocking!!), so breaking up immaturely shows you made an bad decision with your immature mind, hence you'll regret it.

The Good way:
1. Trying to fix things first. Everyone wants readymade nowadays: the generous good guy, the humble pretty, calm girl. No-one wants to build anything and work with flaws. So look first.
2. If that fails, call the person to a meeting. Say, "I'm sorry, this isn't gonna work out. It's both of us, we're too different/bla blah and I don't want to waste your time further. I wish you the best". Do not start laying blame. If the person asks why, assure them they'll get an answer by email in a month's time (giving you time to calmly tell the truth, rather than give a hot answer). Then don't contact them. If they say hi, say hi 6 hours later. Don't be friends, not for a while. They need to heal.

The 2nd scenario closes the door, the first slams it shut. You NEVER wanna slam any door shut in Life.
All the guys I did the 2nd one to, lovely. It hurt, but I was glad, they were glad. The first scenario left me with a lot of unfinished business and regrets and some begging. Make your choice

Seriously, you don't wake up having problems in your relationship and magically fix them with a breakup. Your breakup reflects your relationship, I've seen this 100% of the time. If you go about it immaturely, you will regret, because you made that decision to break up with an immature mind. So better think things through and be slow to break up, just as you were hopefully slow to enter the rel.

just keep it real.

don't be a punkass and text "it's over", don't call any more, or ask for some puny "break" with no intentions to reconnect.

Keep it real. Time will heal their wounds...and hopefully they won't wound you!

Yup, never do the "Let's take a break one". Your chances of you humbling yourself and begging go upto 1:1 lol!! I've never seen that scenario end well, you will regret it mehnnnn. Better a clean cut, you can start afresh should you choose to, than let's take a break. because it plays with the person's emotions and they will HATE you with a smile. You'll find out this one day if you go back accidentally.

Onegai: Yup, never do the "Let's take a break one". Your chances of you humbling yourself and begging go upto 1:1 lol!! I've never seen that scenario end well, you will regret it mehnnnn. Better a clean cut, you can start afresh should you choose to, than let's take a break. because it plays with the person's emotions and they will HATE you with a smile. You'll find out this one day if you go back accidentally.

MsDarkSkin: ...and hopefully they won't wound you!

HE BETTER LISTEN!!

190: mzdarkskin - I love u only on Nairaland.

190: and wats the meaning of that

Guess what I did today?

I taught Fok'n Bois how to speak patois...

190: wow and whos these bois

skype?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFfO2JCD6ZM

*runs from the mob!!*

well redownload it pls and lets skype

wud ring u 2mrw

Onegai: The Cowardly, immature way:
1. Disappearing, no calls, no texts. The person will get the message.
2. Breaking up harshly, blame the other party completely. You did nothing wrong and you just want that person gone fast.
3. Insensitive, sending a text. When you started the rel, you did it in person. Now you avoid the messiness.

The following 3 guarantees you'll end up regretting your decision or begging whilst that person moves on and laughs. Trust me. I've done all 3, you will regret that decision. Reason being, is that how you break up reflects how you were in the relationship (Shocking!!), so breaking up immaturely shows you made an bad decision with your immature mind, hence you'll regret it.

The Good way:
1. Trying to fix things first. Everyone wants readymade nowadays: the generous good guy, the humble pretty, calm girl. No-one wants to build anything and work with flaws. So look first.
2. If that fails, call the person to a meeting. Say, "I'm sorry, this isn't gonna work out. It's both of us, we're too different/bla blah and I don't want to waste your time further. I wish you the best". Do not start laying blame. If the person asks why, assure them they'll get an answer by email in a month's time (giving you time to calmly tell the truth, rather than give a hot answer). Then don't contact them. If they say hi, say hi 6 hours later. Don't be friends, not for a while. They need to heal.

The 2nd scenario closes the door, the first slams it shut. You NEVER wanna slam any door shut in Life.
All the guys I did the 2nd one to, lovely. It hurt, but I was glad, they were glad. The first scenario left me with a lot of unfinished business and regrets and some begging. Make your choice

Damn,you must undergone lots of breakups

solomon111: Damn,you must undergone lots of breakups

Actually, no. But I had to help a lot of people in their breakups, especially guys. And it always seemed the stupider stunts were pulled by them, and then they would regret it, but hold onto some reason not to try win the girl back. I'm working with 2 whom I'm trying to convince to go back to their girls: one is sitting on his hands (and when the babe marries, I will delete him if he comes crying because he did nothing), the other is too focused on his problems(some which he caused himself).

slimyem: Anuofia!

Bushmeat!

cowgurl: THERE IS NO EASY WAY OUT ON THIS Op, no matter ow u serve it, it wil def hurt.

I know; but I've never in my life told someone 'It's over': I just pretend things are going to be well till she reads the line but It's not easy though!

mornin

Onegai: Seriously, you don't wake up having problems in your relationship and magically fix them with a breakup. Your breakup reflects your relationship, I've seen this 100% of the time. If you go about it immaturely, you will regret, because you made that decision to break up with an immature mind. So better think things through and be slow to break up, just as you were hopefully slow to enter the rel.

Well noted; thanks! But I've seen some relationships that one can't break slowly/one cant break without a fight. because I was once in that relationship before and my saving grace was 'my relocation'. Immature breakup like u'ved highlighted is not good but it also depends on the circumstances involved! Anyway; thanks.

phemi3: I know; but I've never in my life told someone 'It's over': I just pretend things are going to be well till she reads the line but It's not easy though!

Reason no. 3,123,652 I don't understand boys. You want to be treated like a man, yet you don't want to act like one. You pretend till she realises and leaves, shey? Don't you realise everything you do shapes you for the future? Or abi you will keep ignoring the problem till it leaves, then marry and miraculously expect that when problems come in marriage, you will ignore it till it leaves or know how to solve them, after all, you havs SOOO much experience dealing with stuff. Then you now see thread: "my wife is contacting her ex, what should I do, am so confused"

I think that should not be a problem.. as far as you have your real genuine reasons, just state out your reasons and you both should talk about it.. then go your different ways.

Onegai:

Reason no. 3,123,652 I don't understand boys. You want to be treated like a man, yet you don't want to act like one. You pretend till she realises and leaves, shey? Don't you realise everything you do shapes you for the future? Or abi you will keep ignoring the problem till it leaves, then marry and miraculously expect that when problems come in marriage, you will ignore it till it leaves or know how to solve them, after all, you havs SOOO much experience dealing with stuff. Then you now see thread: "my wife is contacting her ex, what should I do, am so confused"

So what do u suggest I do? To tell her that 'the dress I once told her fitted on her well; is now exposing her body too much' or she should stop sending text messages to me; when she knows I love messages especially if it's from her. Things are just not working out 'she knows it so do I'. Just wished I've a better way of saying it (It's over)! Never really told anyone that. Maybe that's why I have too many GFs; just cant say it in a matured way like you said. We are just too different!

phemi3: So what do u suggest I do? To tell her that 'the dress I once told her fitted on her well; is now exposing her body too much' or she should stop sending text messages to me; when she knows I love messages especially if it's from her. Things are just not working out 'she knows it so do I'. Just wished I've a better way of saying it (It's over)! Never really told anyone that. Maybe that's why I have too many GFs; just cant say it in a matured way like you said. We are just too different!

I'm not that mature, but I've had guys disappear on me and mehn, I'm over them o,but if they dare come back, I will deal with them out of vex. What I do is tell guys "it aint gonna work out, wish you the best, not your fault" and they appreciate that. I did the whole "leave me, u caused this!" last year to a dude and later felt ashamed when he called one day and said he thought I was nicer and had better manners (because I was then avoiding his calls). So I apologised, because he's a human and deserves to be treated with courtesy, and now we talk. Is he still trying his luck, sure, but I've made it clear and was polite. No hard feelings and if we end up together, I've shown my character truly than if he had seen me dancing in church. There's no excuse not to treat someone the way you wanted to be treated. So either work on you or get ready for the babe that will deal with you

@all, u know when u r in a rship nd things go awry, its usually difficult to talk things over just like dt...there seems to be a break in communication nd i think dt's y those lines come out d way they do, not really cos d parties r immature buh cos our emotions play us many atimes. This accounts for d reason y a rship counsellor has a break up nd a marriage counsellor gets a divorce. They r not immature, they r simply played by their emotion. This leaves most of us crying for help!

Emotions playing you is the big problem. If it happens, sure, but control it and see what next. I've seen good relationships hit the rocks because they had problems and emotions got out of control. That's what a Break is for, to rein in yourself and emotions, refocus and decide what next. Instead, we use it to scout for the next babe/guy. Even if your emotions play you, control it. That's the difference between an adult and a child: one controls his/her emotion. So if you break up messily, take the time to go back and break it right, and proper.