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She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. - Career (10) - Nairaland

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Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Misogynist2014(m): 7:19pm On Apr 03, 2015
Justfollowit:





This is the most sensible sentence you have written so far. I find it inspiring, I will appreciate it if you can keep it up.
Thanks
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by kaboninc(m): 7:20pm On Apr 03, 2015
bukatyne:


Would not even ask him to carry my bag in the first place.

In his boss shoes, I will mellow.

It would be better he apologizes to her personally.

There is something to learn from everyone esp bosses.

Yea....

Seeking redress....maybe lai lai

Make him talk to her personally

She will listen...
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by themejiwalker(m): 7:21pm On Apr 03, 2015
Seun:

He could have respectfully declined in a mature way that would have made the boss say, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked you to do that".

Is there a respectful way of turning one's boss request down?

In Nigeria
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by kunlejazz(m): 7:21pm On Apr 03, 2015
klark3:
I was employed as an architect in a medium size architectural firm, my boss happens to be a lady.

I hitched a ride in her car after a meeting with a client on site, It's was even my first time of hitching a ride in her car, as I have always eschewed it, on getting to the office she asked me to carry her hand bag along, but I turned deaf ear to her request and swiftly went straight to the office, but she came to my office and gave me a sullen glare.

I thought the malice won't last long, but unfortunately for me, she fired me this morning for a no cogent reason.

I'm downcast and bewildered, she's just privilege to be the manager because it's her dad firm, she's my contemporary, and I was on the verge of supervising a gigantic project.

Was I wrong?

OK. Let's look at a reverse scenario:

You are the boss and your dad owns the company. Would it be out of place to tell your employee (a lady who happens to be your contemporary) to carry your bag? I guess not.

So, you're wrong. You took offense because she's a lady. That's immature and unprofessional.

Also, if not for anything else but the big opportunities coming up, you should have played the fool.

Knowing when to 'fight' and when not is real virtue.

1 Like

Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by stonecoldcafe: 7:21pm On Apr 03, 2015
klark3:
I was employed as an architect in a medium size architectural firm, my boss happens to be a lady.

I hitched a ride in her car after a meeting with a client on site, It's was even my first time of hitching a ride in her car, as I have always eschewed it, on getting to the office she asked me to carry her hand bag along, but I turned deaf ear to her request and swiftly went straight to the office, but she came to my office and gave me a sullen glare.

I thought the malice won't last long, but unfortunately for me, she fired me this morning for a no cogent reason.

I'm downcast and bewildered, she's just privilege to be the manager because it's her dad firm, she's my contemporary, and I was on the verge of supervising a gigantic project.

Was I wrong?

Please be honest here. Would you have walked away if it was a man?
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by hemjaybest: 7:22pm On Apr 03, 2015
Its not too late Bro... Trace her to her boyfriend or pastor or someone that can talk to her but if she ask u to carry her bra again pls do it with every strength in ur bone... Goodluck Bro
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by drnoel: 7:22pm On Apr 03, 2015
JayKaba:
Yes, you are wrong. As long you are not working for yourself, you need to learn to 'suck up' to your boss, especially in our kind of environment (Nigeria). Sorry man, goodluck at your next job.

Pls tell the man. U got 2 suck up till u are ready to leave the firm then u stopping the ass licking
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Thinkr(m): 7:24pm On Apr 03, 2015
D33VA:


Clearly from ur grammar, u, Mr. r yet to find ur way into a higher institution. N if u have please ask for a refund, clearly all that education was wasted on u
you diverted from the main topic and attacked my institution and grammar hahaha. Nice to meet you too wink
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by magicfingers009: 7:25pm On Apr 03, 2015
disloman:
Mr master mentality,ao many times had d op's boss ask him 2 carry ha bag?Sometimes i just felt like slapping some pple.
You can start by slapping foolishness out of your head
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by stonecoldcafe: 7:25pm On Apr 03, 2015
kunlejazz:


So, you're wrong. You took offence because she's a lady. That's immature and unprofessional.

.

Spot on that's why he didn't carry it. He forgot this was his boss. This is work and not your home.
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by duni04(m): 7:26pm On Apr 03, 2015
Filmdirect:
OP listen,
I will tell you reality, as i would speak to my brother.
The world you are born into today is not what you are imagining. Women are now doing things, are upwardly mobile.
Fathers are now giving things to their daughters and they are having power that money brings. This is a worldwide thing.
Therefore, you must learn anew.
Not that you should be a door mat but you should immediately erased that man is better than woman mentality that you have.
Just look at them as sisters and mothers if that will help you.

See these men congratulating you? They will not give you money to start your business or offer you a job.
Actually an employer on this forum might likely not hire you, because although they might like your bold stand, they might be uncomfortable
with how you see life, and your quick insubordination. But they will not tell you that.

Remember you are first a follower before you are a leader and that even Joseph was in portiphar's house before Prime Minister of Egypt.
You could have handled that matter differently.

Look at the world in reality and know where and who you truly are at the moment, that will later change as you earn it aright. You were not equal to your boss, you were her employee. It is okay, you have learnt.

Now, please do not go to her and try to work her emotions, as she will see through that. If you want to apologize, do so succinctly and confidently. Don't lean in and look into her eyes or try to work up some feminine emotions. it is belittling and if it were me, i would not rehire you. I almost think for this case, the damage has been done.

Also i honestly do not think it was about the bag. I think you might have eluded pride even before then. She felt what you thought of her - that she is your equal who is no more deserving than you, and a part of your disdained her. I can bet it was in your body language way before the bag incident. Just learn from this.
Insurbodination? For refusing to do something demeaning that your contemporary has asked you to do?
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Nobody: 7:27pm On Apr 03, 2015
klark3:
I was employed as an architect in a medium size architectural firm, my boss happens to be a lady.

I hitched a ride in her car after a meeting with a client on site, It's was even my first time of hitching a ride in her car, as I have always eschewed it, on getting to the office she asked me to carry her hand bag along, but I turned deaf ear to her request and swiftly went straight to the office, but she came to my office and gave me a sullen glare.

I thought the malice won't last long, but unfortunately for me, she fired me this morning for a no cogent reason.

I'm downcast and bewildered, she's just privilege to be the manager because it's her dad firm, she's my contemporary, and I was on the verge of supervising a gigantic project.

Was I wrong?

You obviously couldn't do it because she's a lady, and secondly, she's your contemporary. But you forgot that she was your boss, and the one paying your salary. If your boss was an an older man, would you think twice before accepting to carry his briefcase for him?
Moreover, that was the first time, and it's not like she asked you to do what is morally wrong. If I were you, I would have carried it, albeit with displeasure. However, I would not take it if she decided to make it a habit.
Ladies sleep with employers just to get a job, because of the difficulty in Nigeria. Nigeria is not an ideal country, so we tolerate a lot of mess, just to survive. Yet you couldn't humble yourself to serve in dat little capacity.
I think your pride cost you your job.
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by seangy4konji: 7:28pm On Apr 03, 2015
U r not wrong mate...

Will never stoop so low and its not even part of my job in the company..

She will later send you to the market to buy efo and cray fish later.

Big up man...

ps..there is an adage from my side which say what you ill not accept when you are rich,you need to curb them from the time you were broke...


But if you are the type that can do anything for daily breadGo and apologize then and might forever be her errand boy but you can still apologize and never carry that Godamn bag.forget the fact that we r iin nigeria and there is no work...some things pass money depending on how you were raised or where you come from...if it was my father who owned the company,i would never had asked anyone to carry my bag so all the bull crap saying that if it wa because of woman and blah blah...It no go work for this side...
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by harjorlarh(m): 7:28pm On Apr 03, 2015
don't mind...he 1 form nigerian guy....wey gal no godey boss
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Nobody: 7:28pm On Apr 03, 2015
jaykaylegend:
you know how naija women dey behave na.. If they don get rank or money pass man, dem dey like to show theirselves..
Shall na the problem shall.
He for just use wisdom take tell her say no
He just dey Walker dey go.

1 Like

Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Nobody: 7:29pm On Apr 03, 2015
On the flip side though, I also think the ideal thing would have been to COLLECT the bag, but then when you two go inside perhaps to her office you can then tell her you didn't want to cause a scene out there, but you don't feel comfortable carrying her bag. And that you'd really appreciate it if it wasn't asked of you again.

She would be happy about the fact that you care enough about her image not to stand her down outside in everyone's eyes, but brought it up to her in private.....much like you would like your babe/wife to treat you cheesy

This will cause you to remain on good terms AND will also cause her to respect you.
As opposed to just boning her like that.

3 Likes

Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by klark3: 7:29pm On Apr 03, 2015
sukkot:
thanks for the response. let me ask you just one more question. was this a heavy bag or was it her personal makeup bag ?
That's the point, it's her personal make up bag, my male sensibilities wouldn't permit me to do it. if it were to be another thing, like a model, design proposal, I would have graciously oblige her request.

I guess she was beginning to perceive me as a rival, and was scared of my chances of taking over, because I was highly commended by her dad for a project I executed recently. She was supposed to handle the architectural drawings and specifications, but the layout wasn't working and the project was transferred to my desk.

You know women, her dad compelled her to study architecture, so she could take over from him. she is the lazy type and wouldn't have willingly go for architecture.

Guess she did it deliberately to get me out of her way. But she didn't know I wouldn't have accepted to be the manager, because it's her dad firm.

Just wanted to build my clientele.

It's all good though, thanks man for your concern.

2 Likes

Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by austine4real(m): 7:29pm On Apr 03, 2015
I thought she said u shud cvm on her face&u ddnt.
Op u'r nt tellin us d truth. Dd u c her usin d1ldo,fingerin hersef or u peep while she was in d toilet?
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by logica(m): 7:29pm On Apr 03, 2015
themejiwalker:


Is there a respectful way of turning one's boss request down?

In Nigeria
It's called deception. cheesy You feign injury (in this case). All of a sudden, you've developed a pain in your shoulder. Then you apologize for not being able to help her. grin
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Luckyir(m): 7:30pm On Apr 03, 2015
Guy u are very wrong,that is gross insurbodination, during my last job my supervirsor was a woman i may even be her senior but she is married with two kids like wise me but i always help her with her bag once she walk in to my office and when she is leaving i do d same @ times she say leave it and i will tell her dont worry let me help u . Guy u need to be on their good book should d case of raining days they will also stand by u otherwise u are ur own. i guess u must be full of regret now. good luck
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by LordReed(m): 7:32pm On Apr 03, 2015
klark3:
I was employed as an architect in a medium size architectural firm, my boss happens to be a lady.

I hitched a ride in her car after a meeting with a client on site, It's was even my first time of hitching a ride in her car, as I have always eschewed it, on getting to the office she asked me to carry her hand bag along, but I turned deaf ear to her request and swiftly went straight to the office, but she came to my office and gave me a sullen glare.

I thought the malice won't last long, but unfortunately for me, she fired me this morning for a no cogent reason.

I'm downcast and bewildered, she's just privilege to be the manager because it's her dad firm, she's my contemporary, and I was on the verge of supervising a gigantic project.

Was I wrong?

Hitching that ride roped you in so yes you were "wrong".
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Nobody: 7:32pm On Apr 03, 2015
D33VA:
If ur male boss had asked u to bring in his briefcase for him wouldn't you have done dat?

U were wrong, she's ur boss and it wasn't a big deal until u let ur ego get in the way
If your male boss tell you make he sleep with you

You go do am?

Woman, pls dey look other perspective.
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by dharay99: 7:32pm On Apr 03, 2015
habeebcole:

she fired him just for nt carrying her bag.....does it make sense at all........or wats she feeling like

yea dat looks stewpid of her buh at least, he should give wah it is for ceaser to ceaser
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Nobody: 7:33pm On Apr 03, 2015
RickRichards:

Carry bag? Chai! Nneka don fall my hand.
I'd tell her to her face: "sorry, but I find it rather demeaning to carry your handbag for you" and walk away. This is just one the reasons why I'd never choose to work for anyone but myself. One should know his worth. Don't let nobody push you around. Bill Gates, Dangote, Warren Buffet et all are no pushovers.


but do u know the errands and demeaning things these men you just stated their names have seen in their lives before becoming the great men they are today? All i see in this guy is just Ego.

1 Like

Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Nobody: 7:33pm On Apr 03, 2015
duni04:

Insurbodination? For refusing to do something demeaning that your contemporary has asked you to do?

Demeaning? Really? To carry a bag for your boss, who employed you and has the right to fire you at any time is demeaning?
They are just contemporaries by age, but it doesn't change the fact that she was the boss.

1 Like

Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Filmdirect: 7:33pm On Apr 03, 2015
duni04:

Insurbodination? For refusing to do something demeaning that your contemporary has asked you to do?

No, his reasoning behind it. And she is NOT his contemporary. She is his boss. It is really hard for
some men to accept that. That action was not demeaning because it was a handbag, it was demeaning because to him, she
was only there because of her father and he is her equal professionally, plus a woman. The man lied to himself.

Let me ask you. If you were in the same school as Warren Buffet's son and he later joined his father's company as a
VP of operations, and hired you would you honestly and foolishly imagine you were his contemporary? Honestly?!

I don't care if you shared the same desk, at that moment he is not. Now if you can not endure that, then do not work for him, but
if you do, guess what? He can have you fax papers for him as he talks to his true contemporaries on the phone.

2 Likes

Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by D33VA(f): 7:33pm On Apr 03, 2015
Thinkr:
you diverted from the main topic and attacked my institution and grammar hahaha. Nice to meet you too wink

u r obviously a small minded egoistic child trying to feel macho. Run along now. D33va has more important fish to fry. U can hav a lolly for ur troubles
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by greatgod2012(f): 7:33pm On Apr 03, 2015
You were not wrong!
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by Thinkr(m): 7:33pm On Apr 03, 2015
Luckyir:
Guy u are very wrong,that is gross insurbodination, during my last job my supervirsor was a woman i may even be her senior but she is married with two kids like wise me but i always help her with her bag once she walk in to my office and when she is leaving i do d same @ times she say leave it and i will tell her dont worry let me help u . Guy u need to be on their good book should d case of raining days they will also stand by u otherwise u are ur own. i guess u must be full of regret now. good luck
what if by next monday she calls you by your name "Daniel, carry this bag for me" like she's ordering you to do it. How will that feel? There's difference between what your willing to do and what your not willing but compelled to do. Its an official environment remember?

1 Like

Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by eyeview: 7:34pm On Apr 03, 2015
bukatyne:


It is not everything done for your boss that is written in your offer letter neither is it everything your boss does for you that is his/her 'duty'

@OP: you were proud and pride they say goes before a fall.

Your boss carried her bag and you lost your job.

Goodluck in getting another one.
How would you feel if you saw your father carrying the bag and towing behind a woman who happens to his contemporary simply because her dad is chairman? Be sincere.
Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by nnamdiosu(m): 7:34pm On Apr 03, 2015
klark3:
I was employed as an architect in a medium size architectural firm, my boss happens to be a lady.

I hitched a ride in her car after a meeting with a client on site, It's was even my first time of hitching a ride in her car, as I have always eschewed it, on getting to the office she asked me to carry her hand bag along, but I turned deaf ear to her request and swiftly went straight to the office, but she came to my office and gave me a sullen glare.

I thought the malice won't last long, but unfortunately for me, she fired me this morning for a no cogent reason.

I'm downcast and bewildered, she's just privilege to be the manager because it's her dad firm, she's my contemporary, and I was on the verge of supervising a gigantic project.

Was I wrong?

so instead of carrying her bag u decided to be carrying ur C.V. now to be looking for a new job abi? OK. humility is what u need bro, pride comes before a sack.

1 Like

Re: She Asked Me To Carry Her Hand Bag, I Refused And She Fired Me. by cococandy(f): 7:35pm On Apr 03, 2015
Orunto:
You are very wrong, insurbodinated abd covetous. How can your boss give you Instruction and you immediately start coquetting? You are on your own. You want to be Joseph without knowing how to dream.
i had to laugh
Where do you guys come youbwith such jokes grin

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