White007:
Open your mouth. If talking gets you nowhere then you need to face that what you want and what they want are diametrically opposed, and split amicably.


The point is compatablility. If one partner wants sex and the other doesn't that is a problem. Especially when those contraints were not agreed upon prior to marriage.

ANANABA000:

I saw that frown again, clearly as it lingered with the accompanying deep lines between her eyes while she found her way to our matrimonial bed reluctantly.

It was one of our few nights of love making urge quenching.
With her back turned on me in bed as usual, waiting for me to do whatever it was I wanted while she endured?
At the final minute, when it was time to seal the matter and enjoy the spoils of a penetration, I’m interrupted by that soft voice….”are you wearing a condom?”

For months, I’ve watched the coldness when it was time; it has been same ugly attitude.
She’s not the maid or a neighbor’s daughter; she’s my Wife of five years.
We have two daughters between us and that’s the attitude I get when I ask for sex.
I don’t do that often except when I’m pressed but that’s natural.
I don’t know when my woman is in her monthly flow, I get turned down sometimes on that pretext.
I go to bed every night like a young bachelor, alone in bed and wondering how many other men live like me.

Weekends are hell for me, both boring and lonely.
I’m still looking for what hit me, when exactly and how.
I trust a few of you nairalanders can help me figure all that out.
I’m waiting for both sides of the coin.

pinkiberry:
am a woman and am telling u now that your wife is cheating on u with another man .

Ujoan:


Is this a joke or what?

pinkiberry:
[s][/s]am a woman and am telling u now that your wife is cheating on u with another man .[s][/s]

pinkiberry:
am a woman and am telling u now that your wife is cheating on u with another man .

Ujoan:




Is this a joke or what?

pinkiberry:
isn't it obvious she z cheating.

Dyt:


He's a saint na
A very white one at that, no single stain
All he wrote had proven that black woman is just being a typical Nigerian woman

He even sounds egoistic and proud
I can imagine him telling his wife to behave or he brings in another wife


#dunno what's wrong with me these days sha, aproko woman

Bibors:


i already know how your home is like, you have actually heard those words from ur hubby too.

Ujoan:


There is nothing here that indicates she's cheating.

It's very common for women to lose interest in sex especially when they are with a non romantic partner. She's not some teenager with raging hormones. At 31 and after 2 kids, sex may no longer be as important as it used to be.

It is time for her husband to help her get her groove back.

x240:

Y'all Nigerian ladies were groomed to see sex as something not to be enjoyed, something you do just to satisfy him. sleep on the bed tie wrapper and lay like a log of wood.

What do we get instead? Log of wood, no action, dead style of sex. Why won't it be tiring and get boring?


When you would never take the initiative to request for sex or try to enjoy it. Our mothers made the mistake and the new generation ladies are towing that same line again. No wonder there's so much failed marriages and bitter people out there. If the sex was good and mutual you would be 50% more happy and this would sip into other areas of your lives and makes bonding much more stronger.
It is a no brainer.


This is not absolving the male of wrongdoing but you ladies should please remove the "getting old and loosing apetite story".It's boring to hear already.

Ujoan:


Dear OP . ..

1. Is your wife over 30? Sex drive reduce with age . .

2. Did she just have a child? Childbirth can reduce sexual pleasure . .

3. Has she always been that way? Well people rarely change . .

4. Is she trying not have another child? This would totally explain the Condom request (I do it too )

5. Did you cheat on her or betray her trust in any way? This could kill any form of attraction she has of you . . .

6. Does she have a domestic help? I've never seen a libido killer as great as exhaustion . . .

Irrespective of the answer to these questions, one thing is certain your wife is no longer attracted to you sexually. This is the time for you to quit grumbling and find a way to regain her interest

If you were a woman I would tell you to buy sexy red lingerie, romantic fragrance and hot costume

But since you are man, you may want to consider a romantic get away (without the kids), go down on her (MouthAction) . . . Don't make it all about inserting your kini . . . You can give her a massage starting from her shoulder and graaaaadually go down . .

You need to work hard . . . and I wish u the best!

x240:

And why should it be the husband that has to help her get her groove back?
and aside that, your assertion that most women lose apetite for sex is a big lie with no single fact backing it. Y'all Nigerian ladies were groomed to see sex as something not to be enjoyed, something you do just to satisfy him. sleep on the bed tie wrapper and lay like a log of wood. Yes, some males are to blame but most guys would want a lady who is "mad fun and crazy" in bed. Let him try introduce a new style or taking it a notch higher and she starts complaining that she isnt a slut and he cant expect her to do those acrobatic styles.
What do we get instead? Log of wood, no action, dead style of sex. Why won't it be tiring and get boring?
When you would never take the initiative to request for sex or try to enjoy it. Our mothers made the mistake and the new generation ladies are towing that same line again. No wonder there's so much failed marriages and bitter people out there. If the sex was good and mutual you would be 50% more happy and this would sip into other areas of your lives and makes bonding much more stronger.
It is a no brainer.
This is not absolving the male of wrongdoing but you ladies should please remove the "getting old and loosing apetite story".It's boring to hear already.

armyofone:
ummm, generalization bros.
Which is worst, men seeing ladies as a tool or object of pleasure, or a woman laying in bed like log of wood due to being told sex is bad ?
He should because his vows said for better or for worse. Btw, isn't he the proverbial head of the house
Op, do not threatened her anymore or make a u-turn...the grass isn't greener out there.

pinkiberry:
am a woman and am telling u now that your wife is cheating on u with another man .

greatgod2012:
@op
you're supposed to have asked her before coming here. What did she say it's the problem. Leave NL now and go and ask your wife what the problem is, ask her why she treats you the way she does. Communicate, listen to her and reassure her. Your first point of contact when having marital problem is your spouse, not social forum. Nobody can know why your wife treats you as such, until you ask.

Please do have a heart to heart talk with her. You might find some answers and be willing to work it out with her.
The success of every marriage comes from both party involve.

Also, I will advice you like a page on Facebook called AMARA VAN LARE. You will be glad you did.


GO AND COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR WIFE.

allycat:
My advice is for you to take your mind off sex for a short while and get to know each other again. Maybe she feels all you want from her is sex. Take her out alone without the kids sometimes, for a movie or for dinner take a bat with her wit out inai sting it ends with sex. Play scrabble or whatever game the two of you once enjoyed. Talk to her, if she doesn't come to bed go and meet her and join her in whatever she is doing even if she says it's OK. Become her boyfriend again. Sometimes we get caught up in our roles as parents and forget our spouses matter. Sometimes it's small resentments that build up and snowball into big things.
Then again if your last child is less than two consider post part depression, it can turn the bubbles and most fun woman into a ghost of herself. Everything around them becomes hopeless and they cannot explain to themselves what's more to another person why they are acting the way they do.
Good luck!

Dyt:


He's a saint na
A very white one at that, no single stain
All he wrote had proven that black woman is just being a typical Nigerian woman

He even sounds egoistic and proud
I can imagine him telling his wife to behave or he brings in another wife


#dunno what's wrong with me these days sha, aproko woman

cococandy:

Dyt:


I am changed


Btw you look 13
Chai
Omalicha poraro
Even after one
Keep it up pretty

Abeg
See as you dey shine
Nna mehn

cococandy:

Mr Dyt