Bolade005:

You're the one up in my business, I don't remember quoting or mentioning you so you should swerve.

My girl was talking to me, and you decided to butt in. Rude much?

sweetcocoa:
If you no care, why not face front? Anybody call you? Amebo.

[quote author=sweetcocoa post=45625917]Let them die finish, na them sabi.

It became my business, no, our business when you typed that sh1t.

shaybebaby:

Hot daaaayuuuuuum!!!! Girl's going to be smoking hawt..(ouch!!! Burned my fingers on my phone, too much hotness radiating through it ). If you've got it, flaunt it..I got ya back hunni.

I'm well jel, I wanna party too. We have to sort something out, I have the whole summer to kill.

Lol, we definitely will.

[quote author=Bolade005 post=45627252][/quote]I never knew your name na 'them'.

sweetcocoa:
I never knew your name na 'them'.

Them craze.
Them no get better work.

Will the real "them" please stand up!!!

shaybebaby:

Them craze.
Them no get better work.

Will the real "them" please stand up!!!

See me trouble o, so babe you know someone by that name and you no tell me.

shaybebaby:

Them craze.
Them no get better work.

Will the real "them" please stand up!!!

That's a lousy attempt at mimicking Slim Shady.

sweetcocoa:
I never knew your name na 'them'.

All right.

[quote author=postmann post=45604125][/quote]

If she forgot her role as a husband clearly he forgot his as a husband in Nigeria managers are usually paid 10% yet she was paying him 40% because she appreciated his part in building her career. Is that not enough for a decent human being yet he went ahead to steal her money how can any wife have respect for such a man She had to fire him rather than let him ruin her with debt plus since he was taking money from people saying Tiwa will perform to things she never agreed to. She would have found herself in in legal mess very soon
So a man who earned 40% of a star lik Tiwa's earning for many years had no savings to pay anything for his own child's birth What does that say about such a man. This had nothing with wanting him to be like Don Jazzy but wanting him to be a responsible man. Teebillz had enough opportunity to leverage on a big client like Tiwa and build other stars but no he thought he had found a cash cow.

You cannot call yourself a head when you've deliberately shunned your responsibility. You Nigerian like picking Bible passage that suit you. Is it not the Bible that says a man that does not provide for his family is worse than an infidel

So Tiwa should be the one to hustle, pay all the bills including the house he lived in, everything for the baby , bringing home the bacon, breast feeding, taking care of the baby and yet the man couldn't cook himself the said bacon!

Nobody will be happy to carry all the responsibility in a marriage. Why not kuku.say the truth and be a single parent. Its like a housewife who still expects the husband to come and cook when he gets back from work for her while she sat at home all day. In this case Teebillz was the housewife

joseph1832:
That's a lousy attempt at mimicking Slim Shady.

You are still stalking my sweetcocoa everywhere abi? Stalker!
What does she have to do to shot of you? You are like that one poo in the toilet that one keeps flushing and it won't go- unflushable, that's what youuuuuu aaaaaah re ( in the voice of nat king cole) :

shaybebaby:

You are still stalking my sweetcocoa everywhere abi? Stalker!
What does she have to do to shot of you? You are like that one poo in the toilet that one keeps flushing and it won't go- unflushable, that's what youuuuuu aaaaaah re ( in the voice of nat king cole) :

Oh what are shame.

Mindfulness:
Bukatyne dear,

just a quick answer today because I am cooking rice.

We don't do such silly head and neck analogies. And we don't discuss authority or play immature power games that insecure people play.

We are best friends. We are lovers. We are parents. We are partners.

We both work.
We both do chores.
We both do the shopping.
We both take care of the child.



We both have chores we like doing and don't like doing so we do what we like and don't do what we don't like, this is where the other steps in.


And most importantly, we have a lot of fun.

Am i invited for some rice. Did you spiced it enough with pepper?
Great piece, BTW

analice107:

Am i invited for some rice. Did you spiced it enough with pepper?
Great piece, BTW

And that's why she's mindfulness. I love the way the fullness of her mind works.

joseph1832:
And that's why she's mindfulness. I love the way the fullness of her mind works.

She's actually very mindful.

analice107:
She's actually very mindful.

Indeed she is.

Mamatee07:


If she forgot her role as a husband clearly he forgot his as a husband in Nigeria managers are usually paid 10% yet she was paying him 40% because she appreciated his part in building her career. Is that not enough for a decent human being yet he went ahead to steal her money how can any wife have respect for such a man She had to fire him rather than let him ruin her with debt plus since he was taking money from people saying Tiwa will perform to things she never agreed to. She would have found herself in in legal mess very soon
So a man who earned 40% of a star lik Tiwa's earning for many years had no savings to pay anything for his own child's birth What does that say about such a man. This had nothing with wanting him to be like Don Jazzy but wanting him to be a responsible man. Teebillz had enough opportunity to leverage on a big client like Tiwa and build other stars but no he thought he had found a cash cow.

You cannot call yourself a head when you've deliberately shunned your responsibility. You Nigerian like picking Bible passage that suit you. Is it not the Bible that says a man that does not provide for his family is worse than an infidel

So Tiwa should be the one to hustle, pay all the bills including the house he lived in, everything for the baby , bringing home the bacon, breast feeding, taking care of the baby and yet the man couldn't cook himself the said bacon!

Nobody will be happy to carry all the responsibility in a marriage. Why not kuku.say the truth and be a single parent. Its like a housewife who still expects the husband to come and cook when he gets back from work for her while she sat at home all day. In this case Teebillz was the housewife

And you forgot to say where you're from. Botswana?
You also forgot to say which scripture I made reference to in my post.

Even if you're not religious, do you have a custom? Will you get married according to your custom and perform a church wedding.

If the customary and religious role bequeathed to a husband doesn't suit your "enlightened" perception, then you may opt for a court marriage only.

But engaging in a church and customary marriage then deviating from its tenets on which stood your bond and vows is hypocrisy.

crackhaus:

The only thing you should be bothered about is, does your husband clean up after himself?

I am not bothered.

I'm almost sure no woman has ever come to complain to you that her husband doesn't clean up after himself even when he doesn't.

Good you said almost because women complain all the time.

Do you know why?

I'll tell you:
It's because most women will not fuss or make a big deal out of it just to keep the peace...and by most women, I mean all of you that have been in that position and present on this thread.

Women will rather have be peace then be nagging?

Hey Mindfulness, how's it going? Just saying a quick hello.

crackhaus:
@ Mindfulness

I've read that article you posted on the Gates, and though I wanted to click on the link, I relented cos I already saw what I was looking for - it will surprise you to learn that you put in bold exactly what I will use to discredit your motive for bringing up the article in the first place.

I like how you try to research articles and use them to back up your arguments, but you almost always fail to read between the lines of your own 'posted articles'.

This was the first paragraph:
When Melinda Gates found that time and time again she was the last one in the kitchen after dinner, finishing off the clearing up, she didn’t simply wring her hands in frustration, she laid down the law: “Nobody leaves the kitchen until mom leaves the kitchen.” And that was that.

I put just that line in bold because it's obvious you missed how that rule was made for her children, not her husband.

In another paragraph:
So does Bill pull his weight and do his fair share of household chores? "He’s not much of a cook but he’s really good at doing dishes," she reveals (Bill admits in the letter that he can do "tomato soup" but not much else). And he does the school run too, inadvertently encouraging other dads at his daughter's school to follow suit after the mums went home to their husbands and said: "if Bill Gates can drive his daughter to school, so can you".

He's not much of a cook but he's good at doing dishes - this is not saying he does the dishes, I hope you get it?
If her children already spend all that time in the kitchen with mommy, what and whose dishes will Bill be doing?


You somehow missed the point of the article by a mile, lol.. The article isn't about domesticating one's husband, but about teaching children and the next generation why it will be good to have an all-hands-on-deck approach to housework.

But of course, are you not Mindfulness again..

You are funny.

And you are predictable.

Let us see how you will twist this source so that you can prove that Bill and Melinda do NOT share chores.

Bill: Playing Bridge is a pretty old fashioned thing in a way that I really like. I was watching my daughter ride horses this weekend and that is also a bit old fashioned but fun. I do the dishes every night — other people volunteer but I like the way I do it.

http://www.today.com/money/ask-him-anything-bill-gates-loves-chores-does-not-play-2D12093105


No need to read between the lines this time around.

crackhaus:
@ Mindfulness

Melinda Gates has grown kids that can assist with the chores as they should, I had my fair share of chores too growing up.
This isn't the point of this thread.

The thread is hinged on the context of a husband and wife with no kids (or grown kids) involved... is that not it, or did I miss anything?

Maybe I missed something but it wouldn't make any difference to me anyway.
Why would I be taking care of the household chores alone when doing it together would save a lot of time and energy so that I / we can spend it on more enjoyable activities?

And if this is the case, what then is the reason for this noise about 'when a woman contributes financially, her husband 'must' contribute domestically'..

1.) Exactly how many dishes, cups, trays, and spoons will she be washing that has now become too much work?
2.) Exactly how much food will she be preparing that becomes too much work? For just two people oo plus maybe a little child that can't even finish one sachet of indomie...lol
3.) How much clutter and dirt will a family of just a husband and wife produce that will become too much work to handle?

I don't know how clean your homes are but I love it very clean and there is something to do in the house every day.
And it's not about whether I can handle it alone or not but more about shared responsibilities, which we share out of respect and affection for one another. Why would I be spending more time doing chores alone when doing it together allows us to:

- spend more quality time with our child
- spend more quality time together
- have more time to read
- have more time to do sports
- have more time to go out and socialize
- have more time to watch good films
- have more time to take walks
- have more time to have friends and family over
- have more time to relax
- have more time to develop career-wise and thus make more money
- ...

I don't know what kind of women you socialize with and I don't care to know but I would much rather read a book / the newspapers than scrub the floors and toilets.

If one's husband is someone that doesn't clean up after himself, what does that say about the woman that married him?
Why the sudden complain?

Very good point.
The problem is that many young girls, who are planning on having a job, do not know what they are getting themselves into with a man who was brought up to treat a woman like a maid. Later they suffer and their relationships too.

I would strictly discourage any girl to get herself into a family where she will willingly take on the double load of having to work and having to do the chores all by herself because her husband feels that he has no responsibilities other than brining in money and sees nothing wrong with the fact that his wife is working twice as much.

I don't want to look a lll worn out at the age of 40. Life has much more to offer than chores.

A lot of men do many different things that can be classified as a chore in the home, they do it because they already used to doing it and probably enjoy doing it and they won't make a fuss over it.

I know. I married such a man.

But when a wife starts telling her husband " hey bae, you know I contribute financially so you will/must contribute with chores", na there pesin dey find trouble.

It is not even about money in the first place. It is about fairness. If the two of you work from 9-5 and you come home and expect her to continue working while you have the luxury of relaxing, then something is seriously wrong.

If the woman is willing to take this nonsense .... well, not my problem, at the end of the day.

You will not force a man to do what he hasn't been doing or enjoyed doing before.
If you doubt me, try it with your partners and come tell us the events that will follow.

I don't want to force anyone.

analice107:

Am i invited for some rice. Did you spiced it enough with pepper?
Great piece, BTW

I love it extra hot.

Be my guest. Mi casa es tu casa.

raumdeuter:


When the couple dont share bills the husband was probably killing himself working all round the clock 16hrs per day but his wife starts to work and he cuts down to 8hrs per day to have a better and longer life

But to these women that means he is slacking he isnt bringing in as much and now making the wife spend her hard earned money on her family instead of on herself

That is an example of the man slacking

Well, I would prefer to have less money, provided we can still afford a decent life style, than having my husband kill himself while at the same time not having enough time to spend with his family.

I could only accept such an arrangement if our survival was depending on such.

Money is important but money is not everything.

Health, love and respect for your partner, affection towards him or her and consideration for their mental and physical well-being plus the quality time you are able to spend as a family (=fun) are very important too, at least in my family.

shaybebaby:
Hey Mindfulness, how's it going? Just saying a quick hello.

Hubby and I had a drink too much with our friends last night but I am fine.

How are you hun?

Have a lovely Sunday.

Mindfulness:

I love it extra hot.
Be my guest. Mi casa es tu casa.

OMG, is that Spanish? ahhhh. romantico.
*quickly picks car keys, locks door*
babe, post me ya address.

analice107:

OMG, is that Spanish? ahhhh. romantico.

*quickly picks car keys, locks door*

babe, post me ya address.

Drive carefully.

Mindfulness:


True.

I never wanted to be. It's a matter of choice.

I must confess, your mature comment on threads always WOW me.

Can I have a chat with u?

Okikiki:


I must confess, your mature comment on threads always WOW me.

Can I have a chat with u?

Thank you. I appreciate.

Sure but no PMs please.

I don't believe in gender roles. House chores and financing the home can be shared between couple with anyone undertaking the chores they think its appropriate. No roles should be defined and allocated.

I also won't say coz Wifey is a sit-at-home mum and not partake in house chores. It is my responsibility to keep the house clean, tidy, fix meals and nurse my baby, married/working or not.

However, I won't accept any gender equality arrangement when I'm the sole financier of the house. Any woman who wants equality with me must take responsibility and contribute to the home financing.

In Teebills case the wife was the breadwinner and he shouldn't complain if he's the one taking care of their child. A woman won't feeds you and still retire home to nurse kids and prepare meals. Head of the family shouldn't be a show of gasconade but must come with responsibility.

ronald4lif:
I don't believe in gender roles. House chores and financing the home can be shared between couple with anyone undertaking the chores they think its appropriate. No roles should be defined and allocated.

I also won't say coz Wifey is a sit-at-home mum and not partake in house chores then I shouldn't. It is my responsibility to keep the house clean, tidy, fix meals and nurse my baby, married/working or not.

However, I won't accept any gender equality arrangement when I'm the sole financier of the house. Any woman who wants equality with me must take responsibility and contribute to the home financing.

In Teebills case the wife was the breadwinner and he shouldn't complain if he's the one taking care of their child. A woman won't feeds you and still retire home to nurse kids and prepare meals. Head of the family shouldn't be a show of gasconade but must come with responsibility.

Gbam

Mindfulness:

Drive carefully.

Yea, sure. *whistling, Jellof rice in my mind*

Mindfulness:


Thank you. I appreciate.

Sure but no PMs please.

OK your opinion is highly respected.

Needed an informed opinion on a critical but non public issue.

ronald4lif:


In Teebills case the wife was the breadwinner and he shouldn't complain if he's the one taking care of their child. A woman won't feeds you and still retire home to nurse kids and prepare meals. Head of the family shouldn't be a show of gasconade but must come with responsibility.

There were a few typos in the first 2 paragraphs of your post so I didint quite understand what you were saying.

Just out of curiosity, re Tiwa and hubby, when you say breadwinner, do you mean the higher earner?
I ask because at some point he was making 40% of something . . .which to you and me could have been a decent wage ( I dont know how much tiwa was earning)
Much as I feel like kicking his ass, I want to kick it for washing his dirty linen in public, his inmaturity and the embarrassment that followed.

If Tiwa wasn't a performer, what exactly would she have done?
She would have been an average chick earning an average wage and he would have found a job too and lived an average life.
Maybe it was her mega earnings that made the guys earning look like gari and peanuts.
celebrities also spend a lot on things that you and I don't even bother on.
It could be argued that her status made his inadequacy more pronounced.

He complained that she didnt cook for him, he was just being silly and a very lame excuse.
But the question is was she performing everyday and were there days that she could have cooked for him but choose not to.
Anyway showbiz marriages are on a totally different level
Only they seem to be able to make sense of it.