zed7:
Successful marriages are successful because one or both parties put sentiments aside. Marry whom you like, not necessarily love. Don't go for beauty or shape or wealth, go for compatibility, similar values, one whom you know will give you peace and you're good to go.
However a man or woman has to like his or her spouse. Having the best partner in the world without being attracted to them will not work.
As for the question, the hardest part of marriage is staying faithful for most men and remaining submissive for most women, especially this generation of women. It's not easy to be earning your own income and not be forced to disregard or challenge your husband from time to time.

Why should income be the criteria or reason to challenge your husband. This is simple ego trap. It is the strength of your point of view or belief that should determine if you will challenge your husband on an issue.

PanickMode:
who is this best friend people keep talking about getting married to? is it that we first agree that we are best friends before getting married or something

I read your post and cracked up
Then I saw your username and got finished cos I imagined your panic with regards to the OP

This is the kind of class I like!!!

Let me get my pen. I need to take several notes!

Keep it coming!!!

I concor

Tomide007:
Marriage is friendship between two individuals that are attracted to each other. The moment singles begin to think that way, you'll enjoy ur marriage...or what do u think married people do? They talk. Cose at a stage, you will be used to ur spouses fine face that it will become normal to you. The backside and front side won't freak u again, the breast may have fallen sef. Sex when ure 50 is going to be very rare. If you guys aren't friends, you're in for boredom......

Mazikic:
Marriage is just a formalized Ponzi scheme!

Fortyfifty:
Constantly seeing more beautiful women every day. Some will even give u correct green light but u are stocked with one babe for ever. Its depressing :

Oniranu

UyaiIncomparabl:
Jesus Christ! This marriage business thing is one of the most stressful thing that has ever happened to mankind.

The part which scares me in marriage is having to deal with the fact that someday, the ATTRACTION and BUTTERFLIES at the initial stage will fade away. It's a definite boomerang.

I hope to stay in love, be in love, forever honor my husband and be LOYAL. Na who go be the right man na him dey scare me, because men of these days have totally lost their sense of worth and are just about themselves. It's a load of work finding one.

I think the hardest part for me is having to find the compatible, loyal and understanding person. Once you have these, everything else can be tolerated. Compatibility is very important.

Are you not the one that creates Sparks and Controversy for a living?? Mtcheew

Staying faithful 2 your spouse. Infidelity is d cause of most marriage crisis

bukatyne:


Is there something wrong with your dad that you believe he deserves to be cheated on?

You sound disrespectful to her Dad tho!!!

UyaiIncomparabl:
Jesus Christ! This marriage business thing is one of the most stressful thing that has ever happened to mankind.

The part which scares me in marriage is having to deal with the fact that someday, the ATTRACTION and BUTTERFLIES at the initial stage will fade away. It's a definite boomerang.

I hope to stay in love, be in love, forever honor my husband and be LOYAL. Na who go be the right man na him dey scare me, because men of these days have totally lost their sense of worth and are just about themselves. It's a load of work finding one.

I think the hardest part for me is having to find the compatible, loyal and understanding person. Once you have these, everything else can be tolerated. Compatibility is very important.

Couldn't agree more...

Lamanii22:



Nah... Far from that...

Ok

Such a soft answer

Some girls would have replied with an insult but you did otherwise

Can we be friend

Davesaves:
So because it's 2020 u shouldn't submit to ur husband? pls sister forget marriage.. it's not ur calling ( i'm being very honest here)

K.

bukatyne:


The hardest part of marriage is choosing the spouse who is the best for you now and is capable of evolving to be the best for you in future.

Deep...

What round of sex is enough

Incandescent:
Money matters a lot

For you not for everybody

The hardest part of it is that knowing you have a cheating spouse and the cheating spouse still expect you to trust and respect him or her.

you just have to corporate and still give the culprit respect to avoid divorce.


So hard.

Sometimes you feel so lost

Someone that asks questions don't usually get lost, make dem clear me nah

merahki:



I read your post and cracked up
Then I saw your username and got finished cos I imagined your panic with regards to the OP

eni4real:
Are you not the one that creates Sparks and Controversy for a living?? Mtcheew

What does creating sparks and controversies have to do with my ability to keep a home? There's no correlation, my dear.

Swinger60:
You are making us fear marriage.

Now you are ready for it. The sensible fear for marriage is the wisdom needed in preparing for Wedding.

UyaiIncomparabl:


What does creating sparks and controversies have to do with my ability to keep a home? There's no correlation, my dear.

Controversy will destroy the extended family o

PrimadonnaO:


Couldn't agree more...

Brokenness will go a long way if we want to achieve success in marriage.

tobidipity:


You kinda right though. People become unfaithful for several reasons. Majority do cheat because of lack of real intimacy or some come from a family full of miserable relationships and/or have a long history of miserable relationships, so to them, it’s not even miserable, it’s just normal. So the possibility of someone (who's parents are faithful to each other) to be unfaithful is low. Just my opinion.
Yes U can't vouch for anyone, but people who are faithful exist. Yes we do. lol. Been unfaithful as a man is expensive sef

the percentage is low for people who are faithful i have seen noble people and honorable people cheat for no reason i just believe it is a sin of opportunity lets do a little illustration here try to do a body count on yourself you have slept with women you are not married too ,some you offered them money ,some you stayed in the same hostel with them during school days or some you work in the same place with .Some you even met at social functions and you slept with them just not to spoil the fun of the night most of these women have serious partners so what makes you think our sisters mothers and wives are better than this set of women .Some have even cheated on their partners with people that cant match their partners when it comes to intimacy .It is just crazy so bro it is better to prepare your mind for the worse so when it eventually happens it does not break you down totally

tripplephi:
Well, I do not know what you mean by LOVE in your own language, BUT LET ME BE BRUTALLY HONEST....

The dreadful part where ALL BUTTERFLIES HAVE EITHER DIED OR FLOWN AWAY and HORNnINESS is now a memory AND THE PRESENCE of your spouse feels like a burden cos singleness become so so attractive again like a LIFE GOAL, yet you have to just KEEP FAKING IT AND DOING EVERYTHING when you know it is no longer how it felt like in the beginning.

its Haaaarrrd

I'm sure this is one major cause of cheating.
I'm scared of it. What's the solution to this. I know it will definitely happen to me. I have enjoyed been alone over many years. I know that after a while in my marriage, I will want my wife to give me some alone time so I remember memories of my life she didn't share with me

bigpicture001:
Financial compatibility....

This does not mean being rich by the guy,instead it means being able to share na be of help financially in marriage..,.

Women are non not to be supportive in this aspect nd that see it as their right....

This is a silent home breaker especially for the middle income spouses.


A guy I know divorced his wife straight after sh delivered of their first child... He saved for the D- day..but still fell short of 95k cuz there was complication of deliverering that no one expected.....

While he run from pillar to post to his friends seeking a soft loan pending wen he is paid..the wife still held at the hospital sent her younger sis,who stays with them to secretly go to the house go nd to her matrimonial room nd collect the 65k sh kept in her bag b4 d hubby mistakenly sees it

Unfortunately for her the hubby went home nd met his teenage in law with 65k cash....sh TLD him her elder sis instruction....


He was shocked...nd told the gal to go ahead nd deposit d money to d wife's bank as sh was instructed by her. He continued his nuzzle nd two days later he got them out of the hospital paying 126k additional from the first delivery cost...

Sh came back home nd can't look him in the eyes...quarell after quarelk ensued DT led to divorce exactly one month later....

Gals of this days are too stingy nd mny of them take d Character into marriages.....never ever Marry a lady DT will not b supportive..as a guy,u can't solve all them financial problems in marriage...

This is a big p,no one talks abt

This is the star comment

Very notable point.
Girls are actually very stingy. They can't give what they want to take

tripplephi:
Well, I do not know what you mean by LOVE in your own language, BUT LET ME BE BRUTALLY HONEST....

The dreadful part where ALL BUTTERFLIES HAVE EITHER DIED OR FLOWN AWAY and HORNnINESS is now a memory AND THE PRESENCE of your spouse feels like a burden cos singleness become so so attractive again like a LIFE GOAL, yet you have to just KEEP FAKING IT AND DOING EVERYTHING when you know it is no longer how it felt like in the beginning.

its Haaaarrrd

The problem is usually our definition and interpretation of the bolded, LOVE.

Love is best described by 3 words- Responsibility, Tolerance and Sacrifice.

When the butterflies fly away and the sex slowly fades to black; And the eyes open to see the "real" person you married and the issues that come along with.
That is when you know if you truly love your spouse.
Love is not what you expect to get only but especially how much of you that you can give your spouse.

The poor keep talking about se.x and marriage while we the extremely rich keep getting richer that even Dangote no see our back

Marriage is the union of two bleeped up people trying to figure out how much fuckery they can take from each other and in the process acquiring the wisdom not to push past those limits.

Kokaine:
I'm sure this is one major cause of cheating.
I'm scared of it. What's the solution to this. I know it will definitely happen to me. I have enjoyed been alone over many years. I know that after a while in my marriage, I will want my wife to give me some alone time so I remember memories of my life she didn't share with me

SOLUTION:

Get married but stay SINGLE. Let the ANKO(same clothe wearing tradition) stay with just clothes.... LIVE YOUR LIFE NORMALLY.... attachment is not the goal of marriage but COMPANIONSHIP, RESPONSIBILITY, HOME BUILDING, VALUES, SHARING MOMENTS, etc. But none of those things should ROB you of your individuality o.

Be able to be WHOLE whether your spouse is available(emotionally, financial, sexually,relationally) or NOT.

The concept of 'BETTER HALF' is false and its wrong. NO ONE IS BETTER of anyone... We are both WHOLE and only break into one another when we FUSE in the union called marriage.

Meaning MARRIAGE IS MEANT TO BREAK YOU, break your ego, pride, or any thing that you may not have known was not really nice, it is in marriage we see ourselves through the eyes of another and begin to make some amends.


Change is necessary hence it should not be feared but be prepared for, know the limits of CHANGE. Any CHANGE that CHAINS you is slavery, break free from it. The CHANGE marriage is meant to bring, is supposed to be the one that will make you at your BEST SELF.

So sir, yes, you can go for conferences alone, your wife too may do her own thing with other good women AND there you will have your free "single" space for that period... then you will miss her and long for her... That is the beauty of the union and it goes both ways.

No part of marriage is hard.