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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich (35077 Views)
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Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Nobody: 7:46pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
efosky1246: For Infidelity Yes, not for financial aspect though, because Married men cheat too much, that is why. We are talking about Finance here, what steps should a Man take to act like a leader exactly? Patriarchy & women's subordination is the order of the day, this is how Nigerian men show leadership, they want to control your life, where you go, what you eat, friends you keep. Women have to pick a struggle, freedom with a Rich man is not free. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Hathor5(f): 7:48pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
truthsayer009: Really? |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Romangalactic(m): 7:50pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
efosky1246: efosky1246: 2 Likes |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by efosky1246(m): 7:55pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Romangalactic: Context is important. 2 Likes |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Romangalactic(m): 7:59pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
efosky1246:If you don't know any Nigerian man who deliberately wants to treat his wife like a doormat or control her like a bull, yet you also believe most dysfunctional marriages are the fault of the man, is it a context issue or a constrast issue? 5 Likes |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Nobody: 8:40pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
I am Happy we have some sound men ALIVE, enjoying the inputs from them. 4 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Hathor5(f): 8:41pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
loveymom: So refreshing! Great profile picture. 1 Like |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Klass99(f): 8:45pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
. 7 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Nobody: 8:48pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
1 Like |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by efosky1246(m): 9:00pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Klass99: Well said, however, I am not excusing wrong judgement on the part of the woman. A man that you'd be taking his name; you need to do your homework in all aspects before submitting to that man. The scenario you painted goes to show that there is some truth in the saying that "you don't know the true character of a man until he has money". Money doesn't necessarily change a person but amplifies their true character. So if a man is a naturally arrogant person, it might not be obvious until he has money because the confidence of a man is directly proportional to the size of his pocket. But if you study the man closely, you would still see those traits but the problem is many people turn a blind eye to it. Women should choose right. But men greatly determine the dynamics of a relationship. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by bukatyne(f): 9:01pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
efosky1246: @Klass99 Note the bold. And if you think because a man is a Church member or religious or even a pastor means he is a good man and/or will make a good husband, you are on a long thing. Maybe it is a gift, however, when I study people, I know them. When their spouses complain in future, I think to myself 'how didn't you see this?' It was there all along. To choose a spouse is not easy, I agree however, if done well would yield good fruits. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Klass99(f): 9:07pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
. 4 Likes |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by bukatyne(f): 9:09pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Klass99: I have updated my response. Some flaws are serious, some would manifest later. Every flaw has a trace. Like I said, maybe it is a gift. Once I have studied someone long enough, nothing the person does moves me. I have seen the traces before. |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Acidosis(m): 9:12pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Khonifer: But there are more poor single women out there na. Is marriage a poverty alleviation scheme? If you're single and poor, you can as well be married and poor. 3 Likes |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by bukatyne(f): 9:14pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Romangalactic: If you are a true leader by example, you will weed cray cray a lot. Personally, I like young relationships before both sexes have fragmented souls through multiple sex partners and have become hardened and stiff. 1 Like |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by bukatyne(f): 9:15pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
truthsayer009: What's wrong with Patriarchy? (not the Nigerian version) 1 Like |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Klass99(f): 9:21pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Nobody: 9:23pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
When I saw a response from Bukatyne to Mariangles on a thread saying it is a lazy man's thinking to believe the phrase "People change" ,she went on and on to emphasize on "how it is important and possible to know all of a person especially when it comes to dating. I knew she never experienced some aspect of LIFE. My problem isn't about importance of knowing who one is dealing with. My problem is the possibility, How possible is it to know all about a person. But the question is: Do you as a person know all about you? If yes why do we claim to do things unintentionally, why do you hear phrases like " had I know" , "I don't know what came over me" " She made me believe in myself" , "I didn't know I could achieve that" ... etc. These sentences shows the limitation of human knowledge of themselves. Now how anyone would expect another being to know all about another to the extent of predicting them or actions they are capable of rightly all the time beats my imagination. People change, People evolve! It isn't a lazy man's thinking or anything. It is just the fact of life. You can only know what a person let you know or is careless enough to reveal. A lot of things can cause people to change Money, Fame, wealth, poverty, other people's attitude etc. We aren't made static to continue a pattern, sometimes people can decide to handle some things differently. Now I'm not saying it isn't good to know your partner but saying you must know ALL a person is capable of before going into relationship with him or her is unachievable and always making this the reason behind every relationship failure is just totally unthinkable. Just watch, pray and be wise. 14 Likes 9 Shares |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Hathor5(f): 9:27pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Klass99: Girl you have patience to teach people who think in black and white categories only. They ain't seen nothing yet. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by bukatyne(f): 9:31pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Palema007: If you want to quote me, it would be appreciated if you quote me properly. Ending your sermon with watch, pray and be wise isn't necessary if you believe people change, people evolve so we can't know them. I have even accepted maybe it is my gift some posts back. Some people can discern others, some can't. I hear you. And NL is wide enough, everyone should type what they believe in biko. |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Nobody: 9:33pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
efosky1246:What qualities should a woman look out for in a Man. I want to learn from an Unknown Man's perspective on this. 1 Like |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Nobody: 9:37pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
bukatyne:You don't have to be combative when people point out errors in your reasoning. You can't know it all, be humble enough to learn. You don't have to be right all the time. Yes you can only watch (expect to be surprised) pray (seek guidance from God who sees it all) and be wise ( be ready to adapt or confront situation). Like I typed earlier you don't know it all. My last response to you on this. 17 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Klass99(f): 9:46pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by bukatyne(f): 9:47pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Palema007: I have updated my post. If you did not want a feedback, you should have done the usual NL way and said some people or leave my moniker out of your post. And what make your reasoning the right one? Or mine wrong? To Jennifer Lopez, singing on key is knowing the key and singing beautifully; To bukatyne, singing on key is a miracle yet to happen. Is J-Lo's perspective in this case wrong? Or wouldn't it be strange to J-Lo if I kept telling her that singing on key is impossible because I can't do it? I have spoken of my experience with several people so it is possible for me and my reality. I have read enough posts to see that some people can't see what I can and I have decided it must be a gift and I am grateful for it. Checked the moniker again and just registered today. Hmmmm 6 Likes |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Romangalactic(m): 10:04pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
bukatyne:The ability to do that is a gift, not a trait, meaning very few people are blessed with it. In agreement with your second paragraph 1 Like |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Romangalactic(m): 10:08pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Palema007:Good one, but why not use your main to tell her all this so it doesn't seem like you're on a mission 2 Likes |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Nobody: 10:08pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Klass99:There is something called self discovery, knowing more about one self, and it has no end. Now if I as a person discover things about myself how possible is it for anyone to know ALL about me? It goes for everyone out there. You can't know all of a person but just what they let you know intentionally or not. Even those with discerning spirit don't know all about an individual. Holy Spirit isn't a talkative neither does he gossip, He won't sit one down and start telling that person everything about another reveal person.He will only reveal signs and reveal further if one inquire about this signs. That's why some Christians make mistake because they weren't sensitive enough to WARNINGS. Even those with discerning spirit will be allowed to learn the hard way. Yes People pretend a lot and can go to any extent of they want something,Both Men and Women. Lol @ your example. So many issues are happening right now because people aren't honest. Unfortunately we live in a society that doesn't appreciate HONESTY the way it should. You will be surprised that so many people have wishes and fantasies like yours but because Society consider these things absurd and abnormal people hide them and play along but deep down in them it's there and some exhibit their wishes secretly or indirectly at the detriment of their partners. Money change people. There's a saying : A man exhibit his real character when he is rich or has more than enough. Money gives some sort of power, power intoxicate people, it takes lot of self control , determination and awareness to subdue it. Unfortunately only few have been able to achieve that quest. One of the reasons I don't blame or call out ladies who would rather go for a rich or comfortable Man. They claim whatever personality such man has is who he is. 3 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Nobody: 10:09pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Romangalactic:Because it's on Ban. And I do tell her with my main that she's always barking the wrong tree. 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by bukatyne(f): 10:14pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
angelfallz: I almost missed this: Please see explanation below: 1. Baby heads/leaders: husbands who are babylike in a negative way; don't lead by example, don't understand sacrifice or strength of character, wants everything to revolve around their needs and/or wants, do not understand the concept of responsibility, want everyone to pamper them, are only there for fair weather, have short memories etc. 2. Financial sperm donors: fathers/husbands who are only financially responsible in the home. They provide no morals, teaching, encouragement, discipline, mentorship, protection, spiritual guidance etc. 3. Wives unwilling to take responsibility for their choices: This is clear. A woman choosing the wrong man or unwilling to face the consequences of their actions etc. 4. Wives who revel in victimhood: Closely tied to 3. Because they do not take responsibility for their choices, they paint themselves as victims when the consequences of their actions/ inactions comes calling. A prime example: When God came to the Garden after Adam & Eve had eaten the forbidden fruit ( i would use apple hence forth, shorter), watch the scene that played out: Adam said: It was the woman you gave me. He did not question God's gift of the woman when they were probably running around the garden playing hide and seek; That was lack of responsbility and leadership. He should have reminded Eve of God's command and not eat the apple. Eve said: It was the serpent. O poor Eve! One would think the serpent forced her to eat the apple or wrapped it inside watermelon so she did not know it was the apple. Eve had a lengthy conversation with the serpent before agreeing to eat the apple which she confirmed was good. This was classic victim mentality at play. 4 Likes |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by bukatyne(f): 10:16pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Romangalactic: So I have learnt. |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Ybaby: 10:16pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
jornwhite: So sorry! Did we have a conversation - I cannot remember you or the conversation.... Either way they will call you! Please donot impregnant anyone while you wait. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigerian Ladies Stop Marrying Men That Are Not Already Rich by Ybaby: 10:17pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
bukatyne: Wow!!! Love this! 1 Like |
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