We've dated for 9 months now, and we've agreed to get married next year. Now, he wants to go back to school to study a full time course that will last for 2 years (this was not part of our initial plan). This means that we will have to delay the wedding plans for two years or more.
I'm 27years old now, should I wait for him, or move on with my life? I don't have any one else I'm dating apart from him.

Ps: we've introduced each other to our parents, friends and pastors.

HMMM DIS ONE DEY HARD OOO...2YRS TIME U GO DEY 29 WITH DRIED UP EGGS. MUST U WAIT TO GET MARRIED? Y NOT STILL MARRY BY NEXT YR WHILE HE CONTINUES HIS EDUCATION.

Full time study means he will not be in any employment...how will I get married to a guy that does not have a job?

Though, I'm gainfully employed, I can't afford to be the "husband" while he becomes the "wife".

feature11: Full time study means he will not be in any employment...how will I get married to a guy that does not have a job?

Though, I'm gainfully employed, I can't afford to be the "husband" while he becomes the "wife".

SEE IT BE LIKE SAY U NO LOVE THE GUY, IF NA THE CASE THEN DROP HIM. IF U REALLY LOVE THE GUY THEN U CAN SACRIFICE BY BEING THE HUSBAND FOR JUST 2 YEARS. U R EMPLOYED THUS U GUYS CAN LIVE BELOW UR MEANS FOR A WHILE. ONCE HE IS DONE N GETS A JOB THEN HE CAN BE THE BREADWINNER. MONEY IS NOT EVERYTHING IN A RELATIONSHIP BUT IF U NO FIT WAIT THEN BOUNCE BUT REMEMBER THE PATIENT DOG EATS THE FATTEST BONE

You can have a traditional wedding or a court wedding nah. And what is bad if he does not have a job now?

Taking care of ur husband while he is stil not employd dosnt make u a husband sister,been in sch 2 shudnt stop u pple frm getting married except he is saying odawise...pls talk/ask ur patner,nt asking nlanders if u shud move on or wait 4 him

^^

@chideyhls...he's saying otherwise. I need n'laders that has gone thru to share their experience with me, so as to enable me make an informed decision. We've talked. He wants me to wait for him.

He is a man not God,so he can possibly fail u.What if u wait n in d end he sees u as too old,or too ugly,or find one stupid fult dt guys finds in ladies wen they wanna break up? I will advice u not to break up,but double date,not for fun bt for real.Dnt put all your eggs in one basket.

Drop him and drop him now.Why? Cos he deserves much better than you.
Your posts don't sound like you really love the dude. Even though I think its nuts for a guy at his age not to have a decent job and easily afford a wife but reality is life hands us different paths in life.
If you as a lady can't support your guy for couple of years (in the name of not wanting to be a husband), then you shouldn't be with him. He shouldn't be with you either as you can't help support his dreams and future.
If I was him, I'd drop you like its hot.

This a big risk,I understand your pain.If you have to wait for two years then you must be sure he is going to marry you.But he is also getting the degree for the benefit of both of you.
Tell him your fears and ask him for assurrance that you will always remain number one.

@Feature11.

I'd advice you to drop him because it appears he is taking you for granted. I agree that the alteration in plans is a response to present circumstances. However, a real man should honour agreements of such magnitude...especially when his pride, honour and commitment quotient are at stake.

He may come back to you almost immediately or after the stipulated time. Whichever way, (if he does come back) he would return more serious and committed.

I'm gonna ask u one question; have you found the love of uR life? If yes then the rest doesn't matter! 2 years is not a big deal ok. I know it wasn't uR agreement but don't u think he knows that going for that course will secure a betteR future for the both of u?
Pls don't have this notion of "I will get marRied after 6 months of dating" cos its a huge delusion. If u leave this guy you might end up with the one that will date u foR 8yrs.
It has not happened to me tho, but I have a close fRiend who thought she will get maRried after a yeaR of dating her bf.....but something happened...the guy went abRoad for a couRse, came back and struggled with employment.....they ended up dating for 5ys but they aRe getting married this month.
Baby pls life is so unpredictable, stick to ur man, he needs you!

vivian chinaza: I'm gonna ask u one question; have you found the love of uR life? If yes then the rest doesn't matter! 2 years is not a big deal ok. I know it wasn't uR agreement but don't u think he knows that going for that course will secure a betteR future for the both of u?
Pls don't have this notion of "I will get marRied after 6 months of dating" cos its a huge delusion. If u leave this guy you might end up with the one that will date u foR 8yrs.
It has not happened to me tho, but I have a close fRiend who thought she will get maRried after a yeaR of dating her bf.....but something happened...the guy went abRoad for a couRse, came back and struggled with employment.....they ended up dating for 5ys but they aRe getting married this month.
Baby pls life is so unpredictable, stick to ur man, he needs you!

Lovely reply

Things like these only happen when ppl get involved in a relationship and see it as a means to marriage alone. 9 months and marriage comes up a few months? 27yrs now and would be 29yrs old in a maTter of 2 yrs? Me the husband and he the wife? I can't marry a man who has no job since I'm gainfully employed... I think its obvious, something is missing somewhere -'Love'!

Is he d only guy dat GOD created? Mtshewu

Try to convince him to do traditional wedding, while he goes to school. Explain to him what your heart desires. Communication is vital here. Honest conversation. ....but don't try to trap him thru pregnancy or stop him from going to school.

Think of it this way, him going to school now, only benefits you and your family so its a worthwhile investment for future job and career opportunities. Marriage is about COMPROMISE. If you or him don't want to compromise then you should both: MOVE ON.

Please move on, you obviously don't love the guy, you just want marriage. Challenge me and I will tell you why I said so.

[quote author=Mcleo007]Things like these only happen when ppl get involved in a relationship and see it as a means to marriage alone. 9 months and marriage comes up a few months? 27yrs now and would be 29yrs old in a maTter of 2 yrs? Me the husband and he the wife? I can't marry a man who has no job since I'm gainfully employed... I think its obvious, something is missing somewhere -'Love'![/quote

Thanks broda, I didn't see that you had taken it outta my mouth already. She is just selfish, I pity the dude if he ends up marrying such a lady!

just do a court wedding. its simple and less expensive and requires few family presence. then u can do d rest later.after his programme

nomsochris: just do a court wedding. its simple and less expensive and requires few family presence. then u can do d rest later.after his programme

Abi oooo...pple jst make their life unnecessarily difficult... If the guy truly loves you and you truly love him, and he can't do a big wedding you guys should simply do a small court wedding and get married. And he cn do his masters. When he is true then u cn nw do the white wedding if u so desire and have ur fan fare. But u can't trust him to marry u after his masters. Even married pple fail and divorce talk less of someone that hasn't shown commitment to you yet.

There is definitely no love on her part. She is just looking for someone to make her a Mrs smth.
I know her type, she had wasted her youth and is just looking for any available husband. Ask her and she will tell you f..ck love

One of the most sorrowful things in life is that nothing is guaranteed.

mich2012: Please move on, you obviously don't love the guy, you just want marriage. Challenge me and I will tell you why I said so.

True talk. The girl does not want to sacrifice anything just wants to take and take

Do you think you can get another man that will marry you..lets say 12months from now..?

How is she sure that she will find another man that will love her at all

@all, thanks for ur candid responses.
One thing I want you all to understand is that I love my guy, with all my heart, hence I'm scared of being heartbroken. The issu is nt in waiting, the issue is the likelihood of him finding me desirable to marry.

I'm not desperate to get married, I'm not in a haste at all. I'm tender hearted, and I try as much as possible to protect myself from being hurt emotionally.

For all you've said, I've heard. Some pple understood my fears, some pple didn't. I only wanted you to advice me, not to point accusing fingers at me. fyi, if I don't love him, I won't even accept his proposal. I love him, and I want the best for him.

For those who said we shuld get married, while he's stl in sch, how would u feel if u get married, and u can't cater for ur household, as a man? The whole thing ll be too complicated.

Please whenever anyone asks for youropinion on issues whatsoever, don't point accusing fingers, just give ur candid advice and move on. I love my boyfriend, and I av been very supportive even up to this point.

@all, thanks for ur candid responses.
One thing I want you all to understand is that I love my guy, with all my heart, hence I'm scared of being heartbroken. The issu is nt in waiting, the issue is the likelihood of him finding me desirable to marry.

I'm not desperate to get married, I'm not in a haste at all. I'm tender hearted, and I try as much as possible to protect myself from being hurt emotionally.

For all you've said, I've heard. Some pple understood my fears, some pple didn't. I only wanted you to advice me, not to point accusing fingers at me. fyi, if I don't love him, I won't even accept his proposal. I love him, and I want the best for him.

For those who said we shuld get married, while he's stl in sch, how would u feel if u get married, and u can't cater for ur household, as a man? The whole thing ll be too complicated.

Please whenever anyone asks for youropinion on issues whatsoever, don't point accusing fingers, just give ur candid advice and move on. I love my boyfriend, and I av been very supportive even up to this point.

Why not talk to him about it and what he thinks about this?

@feature11
I love the way you responded.
It is well.. also try to take advise from your parents..
Cheers

@ OP: how do you presently cater for your self?

@ obowunmi, yeah.

I don't want to drag my parents into this yet, so it won't look as if I'm reporting him or trying to convince him.