pearl~hapi:
dis part is very annoying and I wonder why guys do this•i can actually slap a guy for it

AmBeautiful:


My dear,
i still totally disagree.
Testing on a first date, is weird.
First date is a time for observation not testing.

I still say, never offer to pay especially on a first date
And especially when the guy initiated the date.

Instead stick to taking a drink or something light!
That's my take.

Am saying this because all guys are not the same.
It worked for that person in real life because the person you met a guy who liked the idea.
I know some guys who may not like this idea.

What if you offer to pay and the guy allows you pay?
Are you saying the guy is bad?
No he is not bad, HE TOO IS TESTING YOU NOW.

testing on the first date is not it,
observation is the key!

dlex21:
is it a crime for a guy 2 appreciate God's creation

12 inches!:


So being hungry is now a crime now...Or shows u don't have etiquette.

D-Explorer:

Nah! Don't quote me wrong. Being hungry is NOT a crime yet the last grain on your plate WON'T save you to live. It's gross! You go out on a date (maybe not even a date but an occassion) and you pick every seed till the plate is clean. C'mon! It's not done. Ok dude, if that isn't absurd, can you lick your plate on a date because you don't like "wasting food" ?

centje: cleaning up plate isnt advisable but people mannerism differs. You cant force a culture on someone.
What i dnt like is people leaving almost half of food or drink.

D-Explorer:

Nah! Don't quote me wrong. Being hungry is NOT a crime yet the last grain on your plate WON'T save you to live. It's gross! You go out on a date (maybe not even a date but an occasion) and you pick every seed till the plate is clean. C'mon! It's not done. Ok dude, if that isn't absurd, can you lick your plate on a date because you don't like "wasting food" ?

centje: cleaning up plate isnt advisable but people mannerism differs. You cant force a culture on someone.
What i dnt like is people leaving almost half of food or drink.

kunletiwoo:

lol... Some will do this and tell you; "After all the food was paid for"

MRbrownJAY: @Cuddlemi
your list is very dangerous o!!!!!! do you really believe the stuff you wrote?!
Do you believe in the stuffs you write? Now you gonna make me do this back and forth writing y'all do all the time

[b]1.Don’t have se-x on the first date.
why not?! not everyone is closed minded and insecure like that. if a woman is fully comfortable with her sexuality then why shouldnt she enjoys herself, if thats what they BOTH want to do?
Sweetheart, not all men are as westernized, understanding and open minded as you. Some men would even go as far as spreading it as a rumor to people and spoiling the girls name. Its a safety measure but if the girl wanna give it up on the first day, then thats entirely/solely her biz.

3. Don’t arrive too early or before the guy. Arrive on time or slightly late(maybe 5 mins)
in my world, even arriving 1min late is considered a lack of respect. people should ALWAYS arrive earlier to make sure that they dont make their date waiting. making anyone wait on a first date is WRONG on so many levels.
Most men arrive late as well and you see a lady waiting for them. Naija time is usually late na

4. Don’t talk too much because men make use of the vital info you give and sometimes use it to their advantage. It’s better for you to be unpredictable and keep him in suspense.
KAI!!!!!! there is nothing worst than a date who DOESNT talk, thats a sure date killer IMHO. the lady doesnt have to talk about her past r/ship, but she must take part in the date fully, in order for both of us to enjoy it, and not just one person.
What I meant by talking too much was giving unnecessary details on the first date like how men are toasting her, how her father gave her this, her ex disvirgined her bla bla bla. All that is irrelevant and can trigger certain effects.

5. Be yourself, be composed and don't show off.
again, the first date is very important, and although you shouldnt go overboard, you should DEFINITELY showcase some of your "qualities" (whatever they may be)..... no need to tone who you are in real life. if you like to sing then do so, and if you like to dance on your seat then do so....... it may actually make you look DIFFERENT than most.

I said mumbling/humming nonsense(words that don't relate to the words of the song) in order to feel trendy or impress the guy. I find it irritating but hey its just my opinion!

6. Maintain eye contact so he knows you are confident and bold.
constantly staring at someone's eyes?! here is what i would think of such person: madness/crazy/on drugs/ plotting something etc lol!

;DHaba, not constant gazing/eye contact but occasional eye contact for confidence. Would you prefer to have a lady look at the floor through out the date?

9. Don’t over dress.
the simplest thing to do is to always ask where y'all are going so that you can dress accordingly.
Yep, what if he tells you its a surprise? Sometimes the location might be known and yet you still see some over dressed peeps on a date.

9. Make sure you leave on time.
why so much faking?! if you guys have a great time together, then spend as much time as you can together. nothing worst than killing something good with pretence etc. there is nothing wrong in showing someone that you are actually liking this date.....and ladies, when you finally get home, let the guy know that you had a great time and enjoyed his company!!!!
I used 20hrs as an example of overtime. Yes if you are having a good time you can enjoy but at the same time you want to leave the impression of a responsible girl. Leave him longing and curious for more. I mean it's not like that is the last date, is it? Give room for you to explore more on other subsequent dates. Don't exhaust all you can offer in one day.

10. When he is about to pay for the bill, offer to assist, just form by bringing out your purse and ask “you sure you can handle it all by yourself, do you want me to chip in, we both know naija economy is not easy na” Obviously you just did that to fulfil all righteousness, you were not going to pay.
BLASPHEMY!!!!! are you trying to start a NL war of the sexes?! these women are not willing to pay for shiit......and we all know that. a man who makes the mistake of asking a girl to pay for half, will automatically be branded STINGY!!!! as for pretending to do something that you do not want to do?! i think not![/b]

I reserve my comment!

btw, any reason why you had #9 twice?

kavey10: @AmBeautiful, I totally support ur stance. Dnt mind dat Cuddlemii!

AmBeautiful: Also learn to eat appropriately.

The way you eat in public matters.
Though some girls don't mind,but I hate guys that eat like garage touts,banging their cutlery,on the plate, chewing and breaking bones,spitting food from mouth, messing their eating area with crumbs of food, pinging& over talking while eating, licking fingers, and some other irritating ones I don't want to mention.

Many Nigerian guys have quite an irritating way of eating in public,from my observations which I normally do when I eat out.

Please eat& drink, but then mind ur manners.

omega25red:
b. gives you a hug while smiling = good sign

8. the good night kiss: this is the tricky part. you can always feel the chemistry of the date. Sometimes you can tell if she is feeling you so you should make sure you had a mint or gum before you try to plant one on her. easiest way to get a kiss at the end of the date is to ask.
say something like i'm so happy with this date and i was wondering if it would be ok if i kissed you.

pearl~hapi:
not a crime but then don't do it lustfully and don't even let her know your spoilt eyes are on her bossom

dlex21:
see this 1 o!!! spoilt eyes ke?? wetin God give me eyes 4?

all fings bright and beautiful
all creatures great and small
all fings wise and wonderful,
the lord God made dem all...sooo i can look as i like, but guys will def be wise abt it nah...

i'll like 2 go on a date wiv u o!

MRbrownJAY: @Cuddlemii
1: but shouldnt a woman be proud (and stand) for who she truly is? so you mean to say that its ok to be "open minded", but to pretend to be different.....only to show your true self some months/years down the line?

proud and stand for having se-x on the first dates? so if for example a lady goes on 50 first dates, is she allowed to screw the 50 guys because she has the urge? Mehn mrbrownjay no be me go talk this kind talk O, e get as e be

3: i know that many Africans arrive late but just because they do, doesnt change the fact that it is rude..... and if women dont say anything when they do, then maybe thats the reason why they keep on doing it.


9: if the guys says that it is a surprize, then a lady should then reply:" well how shall i dress for your surprize?". if you are going to a fun fair for example, then i doubt you should wear high heels and a tight fitting dress that you cant bend from.

9: why the need to have people be hooked on you? i dont understand it. if you guys enjoy each other's company, and have no other plans, then why not continue the date as long as possible. i dont understand why a woman should pretend that she is busy, when she aint. dont you think that people should be impulsive, and take as much as is available from that person? you want to save some for later when you are not even sure that there will be a later. i guess this is why so many men believe that 9ja women play hard to get.....oh well!

We all type what we want don't mean everyone must accept it. If you see some parts of a post u like, u digest....the one that is garbage or mediocre, u purge out. Me just came in and posted for fun, didn't know I will be psycho analyzed like this

All in all, you always impress me with your liberal personality. Probably you need to start a thread to teach nig men how to treat women.

Cuddlemii:

We all type what we want don't mean everyone must accept it. If you see some parts of a post u like, u digest....the one that is garbage or mediocre, u purge out. Me just came in and posted for fun, didn't know I will be psycho analyzed like this

All in all, you always impress me with your liberal personality. Probably you need to start a thread to teach nig men how to treat women.

CFCfan: Dating can be a nervous experience for both men and women. What advise would you give to someone going on a first date?

pearl~hapi:
cuddles don't u think I should open a thread too?am a liberal woman nau and know ow to treat a man ryt too

pearl~hapi:
av got terms and conditions!if you meet it good for you but if not,dey your lane abeg

Cuddlemii:

Yes, you should!

How to treat men from a liberal lady's perspective by Pearl~hapi

How to treat women from a liberal man's perspective by mrbrownjay

dlex21:
hmmmm...trust me, i've met them already...but for the sake of asking, what are they?

pearl~hapi:
you must be a gentle man
Fun to be wit
Not boring and not a talkertive
You must be handsome[that's number one]
You must be a very liberal person with an open heart[your heart must be butiful]
You must know how to make me laugh
You must speak well
You must not look at my bossom[lustfully or any other part]else I would tag you a “name”
I think that's just the lil I can say here!so do you fit into any of those?

Name kwa?

pearl~hapi:
you must be a gentle man
Fun to be wit
Not boring and not a talkertive
You must be handsome[that's number one]
You must be a very liberal person with an open heart[your heart must be butiful]
You must know how to make me laugh
You must speak well
You must not look at my bossom[lustfully or any other part]else I would tag you a “name”
I think that's just the lil I can say here!so do you fit into any of those?

centje: seriously? You truely have a list? Jeez!!

That's her own 9 commandment

kunletiwoo:
Name kwa?

centje: seriously? You truely have a list? Jeez!!

pearl~hapi:
ooooh yes a name and not a good name too

My dear, do NOT blame any guy for that o cos we all are subject to curiosity. You Know?

pearl~hapi:
that's not. List jare•its just what every person would require from he's or her date!who doesn't want something good?I would actually prefer a person with the qualities I listed than some proud,feel rich baboo

Sijo01: Don't ping!