it depends on the parties involved

Yeah, don't they just hate it when a Lady is successful? Hiding behind crap to disguise what they really are, PATHETIC LOOSERS and you know what...
*middle finger* cos you all SUCK!

newtontoyo:

ohhhh...so just because my wife has made her career a mini-god in her life,i have to wash the plates,clean the house,take the children to the school even cook for her every single day of my Life !!!!!!!

i dont have any problem with doing those things outlined above nor do i have a problem with men that do them.Infact,i do them once in a while But what i have a problem with is her making it my responsibility to do them just because her work is more important to her than the state of the home.In addition,do you think married couples who hardly spend quality time with each other due to their engagements with work are not creating problems for themselves and the kids ?

when a woman is a housewife, it's her duty to see dat the home is clean. when a woman is a working wife, it's d shared responsiblity of both of them (husband n wife) to make d home clean. so an husband that does house chores is doing not extraordinary just how a wife that complements her husband financially is doing nothing extraordinary. i agree that when d parents re too busy, it might cause problems for the kids.

lat4real:

i didn't said you should kill your your ambitions because of marriage, but your ambition shouldn't be your priority at the expense of your home. Your home must come first while other things follow. I can't marry a liability as a wife but i can't also marry a lady that her career is all she care about. And as a typical yoruba man, i was brought up to believe that man "must" be the one that will be providing for the needs(financial) of the family( woman can help if needs be) while his wife should reciprocate by cater for the welfare of the family. Above all, understanding and Love is the key to any successful marriage, if you understand, tolerate and Love each other, career or no career you will have a happy HOME.

I ll agree wit u only if u believe that career should not be the top priority for a married man also. A woman doesn't pursue a career for money, it is to make a place for herself in the society. i'm sure u admire the dora akunyili's of this world.

Bo-large:


YOUR STATEMENT SHOWS THAT THERE ARE POSSIBILITIES FOR YOU TO HAVE LEFT. PROBABLY IF YOU HAD LEFT, WHAT WILL PEOPLE SAY ABOUT U?

PRESSURE FROM FAMILIES AND FRIENDS OR CHURCH?.

WELL, 90% OF WOMEN OF FAME HAD TERMINATED THEIR MARRIAGES.

A YORUBA ADAGE SAYS "A WOMAN WHO WANTS TO BE RICH AND FAMOUS WILL NEVER STAY IN A MARRIGE"

I WANT TO CONGRATULATE YOU FOR YOUR HUMILITY FOR SUSTAINING YOUR MARRIAGE. KEEP IT UP AND GOD WILL INCREASE U AND UR HUSBAND.

Mr., marriage is not d highest achievement a woman can have so please throw that ur crazy adage out of d window! it takes two to make a marriage work! u men want to sit down and contribute nothing to d success of ur homes! if there is a husband i admire, it is omotola's. i'm not saying they are problem free, but d guy obviously supports her and doesn't ve d stone age mentality most of u have. imagine quotin such terrible adage! don't worry, don't train ur daughters so that they would have 'successful' marriages!

Atheist:-D:
So finance plays a major role in women divorcing men.... hmmmm!!!

Why bother getting married in the first place. The women marry for the comforts and benefits only to divorce the men when they have gained all they can. Men are getting shortchanged in marriage.

Men are also getting wiser.

Mrs.Chima:


That's not what I said. Don't make up shit. I am financially sound and I AM STILL WITH MY HUSBAND.

Me too.

Mrs.Chima:


That's not what I said. Don't make up shit. I am financially sound and I AM STILL WITH MY HUSBAND.

Na lie!!!

Excuse me!

Men are you guys still living in the stone age?
Where is it really stated that career women are prone to divorce?
(A sensible career woman balances her career& home together)
I know so many of these women and till date they are still very much glued to their husbands and they are even more romantic than this present generation!

***eyes rolling****

If you don't want your wife to pursue a career, then better go marry a girl from the village, when i mean village, i mean the really uncivilized villages.
There you would get full time home makers and baby making ovens!

Lots of Loving, Loving!

bukatyne: when a woman is a housewife, it's her duty to see dat the home is clean. when a woman is a working wife, it's d shared responsiblity of both of them (husband n wife) to make d home clean. so an husband that does house chores is doing not extraordinary just how a wife that complements her husband financially is doing nothing extraordinary. i agree that when d parents re too busy, it might cause problems for the kids.

I agree with you and if u check my previous post,I said I also participate in the house chores as well.My Point is,some women are so addicted to their careers,they transfer those responsibilities to their husbands just because they feel they are much more busier than he is or because they feel they put more money on the table than he does.In addition,just because a woman puts more money on the table does not give her the right to disrespect and treat her husband unfairly.I also see this happen a lot.

amefi:


Na lie!!!

You just mad cos I don't want you. Hell...nobody wants you.

NEROSKY:
Maybe his hand is behind ur success

My education and drive is behind my success...but I digress. My point is that not all women who have the means to support themselves divorce all nilly willy simply because they can. If I wanted to leave my husband....I would have done it YEARS AGO and why would I divorce my husband when he hasn't given me ANY REASON TO?

I take my marriage serious and don't think it is something to play around but I can only speak for myself.

Mrs.Chima:


My education and drive is behind my success...but I digress. My point is that not all women who have the means to support themselves divorce all nilly willy simply because they can. If I wanted to leave my husband....I would have done it YEARS AGO and why would I divorce my husband when he hasn't given me ANY REASON TO?

[b]I take my marriage serious [/b]and don't think it is something to play around but I can only speak for myself.

na lie joor.

amefi:

na lie joor.

Awwwwww. A jealous hater.

Some of the statements here are absolutely ridiculous. So it's a crime to be a career woman and family woman at the same time? What's the point of going to school and getting a degree if your only purpose is being a housewife? Nonsense.

This message is not Africa friendly. People write stuff that sell, so better chew the meat and spit bones.
It's common knowledge that Africa lags behind in as far as education is concerned esp for the girl child.
African communities also respect the marriage institution.
Now imagine the impact such a message can have on rigid traditional men who abhor female education.
We need to encourage girls to study to the highest level possible for development sake.
The only way a career can bring about divorce,imo is if everything else stops for career sake.And that could happen to both sexes.

Take what is applicable to you and the society you live in or else you suffer.

Mrs.Chima:


Awwwwww. A jealous hater.

sanb: You just made the point "understanding type" which is what a husband should be if he has a career wife...

In other words, the hubby should be able to tolerate the crap the lady begines to dole out when she starts to earn the big buck? No thank you.

.

Men really really make me laugh! its unbeliveable

You want career women, then a housemaid, then a submisive wife. If you choose to have a career woman that you share the bills half you most share the chores to into half she is not your slave.

If you are man enough to be the alpha male and provide for your family needs then you have the luxury of a submissive wife; check your make up before your venture into marriage otherwise you will not only be suprised you will be shocked!

newtontoyo:

I agree with you and if u check my previous post,I said I also participate in the house chores as well.My Point is,some women are so addicted to their careers,they transfer those responsibilities to their husbands just because they feel they are much more busier than he is or because they feel they put more money on the table than he does.In addition,just because a woman puts more money on the table does not give her the right to disrespect and treat her husband unfairly.I also see this happen a lot.

when u say transfer of chores, it means u stil see it as solely that of d women. most men would see disrespect and unfairness in anything that a wife who earns higher does. i'm not saying that some women don't treat their husbands unfairly though. men should learn how to earn respect and not demand it.

ocelot2006:

In other words, the hubby should be able to tolerate the crap the lady begines to dole out when she starts to earn the big buck? No thank you.

and wat makes u think d woman ll dole out crap when she earns higher? ll u dole out crap to ur lady when u earn higher? a bully ll always see a bully in everyone

ebonyvibe: Men really really make me laugh! its unbeliveable

You want career women, then a housemaid, then a submisive wife. If you choose to have a career woman that you share the bills half you most share the chores to into half she is not your slave.

If you are man enough to be the alpha male and provide for your family needs then you have the luxury of a submissive wife; check your make up before your venture into marriage otherwise you will not only be suprised you will be shocked!

ebonyvile, i beg to disagree. a wife submission has nothing to do wit her education or stand in life; all women should be submissive to their husbands. however, wat a lot of people understand submission to be is not submission but slavery. a husband is to love his wife and we find the characteristics of that love in 1cor13:1-8 and the wife responds to her husband's love by submittin. a husband who loves his wife esteems his wife above himself, considers her first when making suggestions and does everything in his power to please her. the wife in turn esteems her husband above herself (submits) and does everything in her power to please him. so submission is to balance d man's love so that he doesn't seem like a fool! else the man is esteeming d woman and the woman is not esteeming the husband and he is left hanging. d prob is that most men want to esteem themselves and also want their wives to esteem them too that's why d women find it difficult to submit because it has become slavery! that's why a man doesn't want to tolerate d rubbish of his wife but his wife must tolerate his rubbish, afteral, he is d 'head' not knowing that d head is a position of duty and performance. it takes a God fearing man to genuinely love his wife. God ll help our men and remove the spirit of selfishness, ego, hard heartedness and pride and He ll help d women submit. take care

@bukatyne

I agree with e everything you have said but I think we are saying the same thing just using different words.

ebonyvibe: @bukatyne

I agree with e everything you have said but I think we are saying the same thing just using different words.

no problem then. have a splendid sunday. p.s.: didn't u go to church?

Mrs.Chima:


My education and drive is behind my success...but I digress. My point is that not all women who have the means to support themselves divorce all nilly willy simply because they can. If I wanted to leave my husband....I would have done it YEARS AGO and why would I divorce my husband when he hasn't given me ANY REASON TO?

I take my marriage serious and don't think it is something to play around but I can only speak for myself.

you barely cuz i av seen woman who fears n respect her husband very much while she was D one who brought the success, she even bought a car 4 her husband i fink endin last year..
you need 2 see their 2,wif their kid how they synchronize n respect each oda..am jealous
i wish to av dat kinda family, not her been behind my success,buh jst a sensitive woman...

of course, hence why the divorce rate is higher in countries where women are more educated. since being married isnt considered an achievement in these countries and women arent required to trade in dignity for social status. if he mucks about you throw his ass to the roadside and even collect all his money. . . . .

bukatyne: when u say transfer of chores, it means u stil see it as solely that of d women. most men would see disrespect and unfairness in anything that a wife who earns higher does. i'm not saying that some women don't treat their husbands unfairly though. men should learn how to earn respect and not demand it.

I never said its solely the woman's responsibility to take care of the chores but it behoves the husband to assist the wife in doing the house chores and if I understand you perfectly,u mean because my wife works and puts more money on the table,I should take over the house chores as well as taking care of the kids as my responsibilty to earn the respect of my wife ??
Husbands don't need to beg or demand respect from their wife.As u just quoted d bible in one of your posts,the wife should 1st respect and submit to her husband den the husband should in turn honour her.
Their is a big difference between a woman seeing d well being of the home as her responsibility and what u understand as slavery!!! That a woman takes care of the house chores does not make her a slave to the husband.The husband has his sole responsibilty too as I would not expect my wife to wash our car on my behalf for example,
Bottom line is,each couple has their responsibilty in the home.They should come to each other's aid in taking care of those responsibilities not transfer it totally to the each other.

Pump!

Yes, sooner a woman begins to see her bank account swollen far more than her husband what next do you expect to happen to that marriage. that is why when we pastors are counseling married couples in things like this - it is a crucial matter,are then saying that wife should not take up paid jobs capital NO!

Yes, sooner a woman begins to see her bank account swollen far more than her husband what next do you expect to happen to that marriage. that is why when we pastors are counseling married couples in things like this - it is a very crucial matter,are we then saying that wife should not take up paid jobs capital NO!

That's not a good idea cause she will regret it at last. Even she hides her regret from the public, on her own when she is lonely she will always fill the pain