lekibraky: How are you so sure he is coming back for you and not for his family u dot visit or the new girl friend he has gotten. U have showed the house the kind of girl you are when u honestly tell us u don't visit his family me and my husband settle it mata d way u like jare

Im sure he is coming back for his family. That's fine, that's what he should do. I can only go by what he shows me and what he tells me. He says he is coming back for me. Like at first when he left I was the one who dropped him off at the airport and I'll be the one picking him up when both times I have suggested a family member to do so, but he is clear to them and to me that he wants me to do it. Just like he is clear about his feelings.

Mad Cow: It looks like someone has been fhucking around in the last six months...

What makes u say that?

You start with getting all the goodies, including but not limited to sxxx. Then ask him to marry you and promise never to leave you ever. If the sxxx is good, then you are on point cos he will definitely do as you say.

You should either hold him spellbound or sxxbound. Good luck with your love matters.

Omo Alata: Ol'girl, you need to be frank with him. Yeah, it'll hurt but he'll get over it. On no accounts must you let him cohabit with you He can squat at one of his family's place.

there is noting to understand here. It is not possible finish

OP is making it look like the chap is returning from the penitentiary.

@Poster, I feel something is not right here and I would make my feeling clear to you, You said you are not very good at distance relationship and he's been away for 6months or so, does it mean while he was away you gave up on the relationship and moved on ? Moving on includes finding someone else and sleeping with the person already; you can tell us the truth here. And if the answer to my question is yes, whats wrong with your present relationship? Is it worth letting your long gone BF go? and if its not worth letting him go, are you planning to tell the guy coming around now that you've been with someone else while he's away? he's probably done the same thing but one thing I know for sure is that when a guy really loves a lady, no matter the number of women/ladies he sleeps with, the person he loves remain his NO.1 and he would always come for her but that is not the case for women, women are cool with whoever they see around them, most especially when they are already getting intimate.

Babe, for us to really know what to say about your relationship with this guy, you should brief us about what has happened during the past 6months. I don't have a problem with you not visiting his family while he's away, you are only his girlfriend according to what you said, not his fiance.

Gbyte: @Poster, I feel something is not right here and I would make my feeling clear to you, You said you are not very good at distance relationship and he's been away for 6months or so, does it mean while he was away you gave up on the relationship and moved on ? Moving on includes finding someone else and sleeping with the person already; you can tell us the truth here. And if the answer to my question is yes, whats wrong with your present relationship? Is it worth letting your long gone BF go? and if its not worth letting him go, are you planning to tell the guy coming around now that you've been with someone else while he's away? he's probably done the same thing but one thing I know for sure is that when a guy really loves a lady, no matter the number of women/ladies he sleeps with, the person he loves remain his NO.1 and he would always come for her but that is not the case for women, women are cool with whoever they see around them, most especially when they are already getting intimate.

Babe, for us to really know what to say about your relationship with this guy, you should brief us about what has happened during the past 6months. I don't have a problem with you not visiting his family while he's away, you are only his girlfriend according to what you said, not his fiance.

I like your points but I have a question on your last sentence. If she was a fiancee, would it have been proper if she visits his family or otherwise? As far as I am concerned, until one is married, it is no obligation to go visit families and for that reasons, I think I got no problem with she not visiting while he was away.

GboyegaD:

I like your points but I have a question on your last sentence. If she was a fiancee, would it have been proper if she visits his family or otherwise? As far as I am concerned, until one is married, it is no obligation to go visit families and for that reasons, I think I got no problem with she not visiting while he was away.

It wouldn't have been a problem either, but atleast it makes more sense when a fiance visits parent than when girlfriend does, thats what am trying to say.

Somebody said most women are cursed with ingratitous perversity......now i know better!!!

KateSpade:

He knows. Told him months ago.

keep reminding him until he stays off everyone needs privacy

Mad Cow: It looks like someone has been fhucking around in the last six months...

and maybe nt just f..kin around alone, seems dia'z alot to hide frm d 6months, it explainz d need 4 'som space' i guezz. She dint even exprezz like as if dey wa communicatin durin d dstnce period

Mynd_44:
I wonder if you actually believe what you just wrote there

And sincerely i tink he changes women like he does wid his boxers. Its all game 4him.

na wa for this post....is everything all about u katespade?

@OP, i know your problem...this guy must have travelled outta the country to hustle but unfortunately, things didn't go well with him financially. Now he's coming back home to start life afresh and u are trying to back out on him. If he had shipped in 6 solid jeeps from wherever he is coming from, you would'nt have posted this here...See why i can never give my heart to a Nigerian woman. I'd rather love my pet dog

FoolS...God Punish U N ur Yeye post

From wat u wrote, u seem to hav everythin under control...! Jus Re-read yr own post, lik u didn't write it! In it is all d advice u need!

Gbyte: @Poster, I feel something is not right here and I would make my feeling clear to you, You said you are not very good at distance relationship and he's been away for 6months or so, does it mean while he was away you gave up on the relationship and moved on ? Moving on includes finding someone else and sleeping with the person already; you can tell us the truth here. And if the answer to my question is yes, whats wrong with your present relationship? Is it worth letting your long gone BF go? and if its not worth letting him go, are you planning to tell the guy coming around now that you've been with someone else while he's away? he's probably done the same thing but one thing I know for sure is that when a guy really loves a lady, no matter the number of women/ladies he sleeps with, the person he loves remain his NO.1 and he would always come for her but that is not the case for women, women are cool with whoever they see around them, most especially when they are already getting intimate.

Babe, for us to really know what to say about your relationship with this guy, you should brief us about what has happened during the past 6months. I don't have a problem with you not visiting his family while he's away, you are only his girlfriend according to what you said, not his fiance.

Whoa there I never said I was moving on. I want to be with him. I just know from previous times when he or I are away and then when we are together I act very awkwardly. Nothing has happened since he has been gone, started grad school, busy summer working. I hang around a lot of my family a lot. Yea there have been guys trying to creep since they know he is gone but I've ignored them and ended a few friendships (male and female) because of them disrespecting my relationship.

Omogbhollahorn:
keep reminding him until he stays off everyone needs privacy

Thanks, Will do.

Decryptor: @OP, i know your problem...this guy must have travelled outta the country to hustle but unfortunately, things didn't go well with him financially. Now he's coming back home to start life afresh and u are trying to back out on him. If he had shipped in 6 solid jeeps from wherever he is coming from, you would'nt have posted this here...See why i can never give my heart to a Nigerian woman. I'd rather love my pet dog

No, its not like that at all. As long as he is secure with himself, I'm fine. I don't ask him for anything material.

SimplySEA: From wat u wrote, u seem to hav everythin under control...! Jus Re-read yr own post, lik u didn't write it! In it is all d advice u need!

Thanks! I'll just take things slow.

KateSpade:

Thanks! I'll just take things slow.

Well, miss Kate you really seem confused about alotta things. obviously you don't love him no more. For you to call his being away for 6 months a long distance relationship! You know what will make you happy. Better still, move on. Your heart doesn't seem to be in it anymore!

KateSpade: I am currently in a long distance relationship. My bf will be returning in about two months after being away for over 6 months. Over the course of the 6 months, it has been difficult for me at times. I miss him but I also resent him for being gone for so long.

I know certain adjustments will have to be made
Adjustments like making time for him and possibly not keeping up with all of the new tasks I did in his absence. Seeing his family again (some of them live her but I haven't seen the majority of them since he has been gone). The only time I have seen them is when it was work-related.

I don't want to bombard him when he returns. However, I know that he and I will have to have a conversation about our relationship because I know I won't be able to pick up right when we left off. I don't want him to be with me simply because I'm still around and I want to be clear about each of our intentions and future plans without being too rude.

Has anyone here ever been in this position before? Any advice, tips?

Pls complete complete ur story by tellin us ur keepin a date with some1 while he was away..If u knw what is means to be without ur man for 6months then I don't tink u wud have brought this topic up on NL..

demitola:
And sincerely i tink he changes women like he does wid his boxers. Its all game 4him.

Too bad

OP,

It seems you are having second thoughts or even afraid of commitment. Something women usually accuse men of.

I also think that your guy hasn't made it enough yet and in your opinion, he may seem not to have the potential to achieve the kind of status you expect your future husband to have.

Years from now you will have JD after your name. What will he have? Yes people can be that shallow and you are not alone. So be sincere to yourself and your guy. If you want to shop around first and make him your back-up, fine.

If you don't love him with all your heart, don't go into it just because he loves you. It will hurt everyone long term. The guy deserves a guy who equally loves him irrespective of his current stage in life.

I lived apart from my girl way longer than you guys have, and she didn't even have the right to visit at will. I never even thought of cheating one day despite a few temptations.

OP, even though you say you want your bf, you're apprehensive over his coming back and his plans for your future, you want him to discuss said future immediately and that your plans are different from his. Well, I kinda agree with everyone that it seems you're not really into him anymore (maybe you never were). Try to figure out what is causing that, do you like him as a person, and are just managing till someone you like more comes to sweep you off your feet? Is something going on that makes him less attractive to you? The worst you can do is waste his and your time. I think you should have a clear talk with him, better for both of you to be free to go after what you really want than for you to feel like you're stuck with him, while he loves you. No?

KateSpade: "I met someone about a two months ago. I've never felt so comfortable so quickly around another man as I do this man. Usually I am pretty shy and standoff-ish but with him things flow so easily. I certainly didn't expect to be attracted to someone because the only reason I met him is through work. However, I have a bf, I havent done anything but talk to this other guy but still I want to know.

Has anyone ever left a relationship for someone else or just to try dating someone else and then regretted it later? And what were your reasons to do so?

I could just be feeling this way because I'm currently in a long distance, but this other guy and I seem to have so much more in common and he would gel with my family and friends so easily'. https://www.nairaland.com/939369/regrets

There's no smoke without fire.

Baba1010: KateSpade: "I met someone about a two months ago. I've never felt so comfortable so quickly around another man as I do this man. Usually I am pretty shy and standoff-ish but with him things flow so easily. I certainly didn't expect to be attracted to someone because the only reason I met him is through work. However, I have a bf, I havent done anything but talk to this other guy but still I want to know.

Has anyone ever left a relationship for someone else or just to try dating someone else and then regretted it later? And what were your reasons to do so?

I could just be feeling this way because I'm currently in a long distance, but this other guy and I seem to have so much more in common and he would gel with my family and friends so easily'. https://www.nairaland.com/939369/regrets

There's no smoke without fire.

10q u very much. I was jst abt referrrin ha back to ds thread. Seriously i think there's cockroach in ha cupboard.

i wish i knew dis guys num (d one comming back) would have talked some sense to him. got some questions for u though

1. did u have a bf b4 d coming guy?
2. did u develop an affair with the comming guy while still with old guy
3. has old guy proposed ?
4. i have a feeling old guy proposed / every one knows you with him (and you cant hide that when coming guy moves in with u)

@all, experience has proven that when a lady starts complaining, she isnt into d guy again otherwise op would have gone to buy some nice undies, scents, flowers, planned dinner, welcome party e.t.c and even have sleepless nyt over his coming.


in conclusion, you cant eat your cake and have it, u r probably a still growing and not experienced, a lot of teenagers are often myopic with their thoughts, cant settle wit a man on time,cos another comes quickly to do something different and exciting (wait till u r jilted over and over, you will be glad a man is coming for u after six months)

Complain too much. D time u used writing dis trend. U wld ve used it to tink abt hw u wil fix d ish

Annie.salis:


10q u very much. I was jst abt referrrin ha back to ds thread. Seriously i think there's cockroach in ha cupboard.

The poster is a lair!.....she met another guy and her mind is divided as who to choose.I just pity the other guy coming home.let me even ask u this...on what ground do u believe this guy u just met is bera than ur boyfriend money, career,....I just pity d guy.

@poster,there's really no need to be judgemental here.everyone has the right to what makes him/her happy.from my point, if u have chosen to devote and be committed to your relationship at hand,I see no reason u asking advice about how to move on irrespective of kinda of relationship(long, distanced or short).what I do believe in this case is for u to affirm d status of ur relationship wif dis guy when he gets back.moving in with u while u try to confirm or get answers to ur questions is really a wrong move and ur guy should know dat.u guys should just patiently work things out and believe me, u need no soothsayer to tell you if things are still ok and sure for you to move on.we are all at one time or the other caught up with the vagaries of life but let me let out a secret,make your relationship no matter how bad or good they are your priority.if u do things will fall into place.try it out